Kokoke Na Hoaloha
by Bugsbunnyaloha
Summary: When Steve receives an invitation to a reunion between high school friends on the mainland, it forces him to relive painful memories of a lost friend that had drowned and to seek out much needed forgiveness from the twin sister. But the trip turns out to be more than he expected; closure and forgiveness aren't the only things he returns home to Hawaii with.
1. Chapter 1

Steve sat at his office desk staring at the picture on his computer. Of the five people in the photo along side of him, his eyes were on one individual in particular. Her beautiful smile radiated off the page. Her jet-black hair was in a high ponytail over her head. The emerald-green eyes shined and danced as she had one arm around him and the other around her identical twin sister. The picture was sixteen years old and of all the people in the photo she was the only one that hadn't aged past that day.

There were six of them and they shared everything together from classes to lunches to weekends. They were inseparable; friends for life; until that one fateful day when Karen had been taken away from them in the blink of an eye. He hadn't been strong enough to pull her from the raging water that sucked her down under the rocks in the river. He would have died with her if Jack and Craig hadn't jumped in and pulled him back from going down after her. He could still hear his girlfriend Carly screaming hysterically as she watched her twin sister disappear.

They were just two weeks shy of graduation and the group hadn't been together since her funeral sixteen years earlier.

He read the email a second time, inviting him to a reunion at a place called Eagle Lake, someplace in Northern California. The invitation was more of an encouragement, expressing their hopes of seeing him. The email came from Julie, or Jules as they had always called her. Last he heard she and Jack were still married. They were high school sweethearts and wed not long after graduating from college. Steve was in the Seals by then and hadn't received the invitation until after the wedding had already taken place. He'd only spoken to them twice over the years, mostly because communication to the outside world was not something that was easily done, or that's the excuse he allowed himself, especially when it came to Carly.

The email mentioned that Craig owned the house on the lake. He was the only one of the four that Steve had seen over the years. They met up once not long after he'd moved back to Hawaii when Craig had been in town on business. He had just gone through a nasty divorce and stayed over a couple of extra days at Steve's house and they just hung out like old times.

He wondered if that trip was the fire that started the reunion idea. Whoever started it, they had been wise to pass the reins on to Jules. She was and always would be a cheerleader at heart, and would stop at nothing to get the gang back together. He could sense it in her email to him. She kept it brief, but made subtle hints such as she would rather catch up in person than over an impersonal computer or that they weren't getting any younger, life was too short. He smiled at the thought of her and Jack. She was the head cheerleader and Jack was Steve's wide receiver on the football team. They were a match made in heaven.

He wondered if Carly was going to be there. She was the only one of the four he hadn't spoken with since Karen's funeral, and even that day they had barely acknowledged one another. He had so much guilt over losing his grip on Karen and she had so much sorrow over losing a piece of herself in her twin's death. It had been difficult for all five of them, but Carly and Steve had taken it the hardest. The fact that they had been together as a couple for only a few weeks before that took backseat to everything they were dealing with. They had never broken up; they just stopped seeing each other all together. He worked over the summer and then in the fall left for the Navy. He knew she had been accepted to UCLA, she and Karen both had, but he heard a couple of years later that she had dropped out her first semester and moved back home. Last he heard she was married, no kids.

His eyes roamed the photo, remembering each person fondly. They were his family those last couple years of high school. He never would have made it after moving to LA from Hawaii without them. He had met Craig and Jack first and then of course Jules who had brought on her fellow cheerleading partner Karen and her twin sister Carly who opted for swimming instead, 'less of an attention getter,' he thought.

Carly looked identical to her sister, but personality wise, they were completely opposite. Karen was outgoing and loved the attention she would get from pulling pranks at school, nothing harmful, usually just something spirited, like taking balloons with their high school colors and filling the opposing football teams locker room with them, or at half time at the football games she would target a teacher, and with a microphone in hand she would seek them out in the crowd, asking them random questions about the game to see if they were paying attention. It became a Friday night ritual and the crowd loved not only her questions, but also her quick replies, which was like watching a comedy show. The fact that she was incredibly beautiful didn't hurt either. People were drawn to her. The staff at the high school let her get away with most of her high jinx because her good nature and kindness were just as apparent.

And then there was Carly, just as beautiful but unlike her sister, she didn't like the attention. She was often mistook for Karen and told Steve one time that she was contemplating wearing a big C on clothes, like the girl did in that old TV show so people would know she wasn't Karen. He was one of only a few people who could tell them apart. It took some time and they would even try to fool him, but he would always catch on after a couple of minutes and call their bluff. While Karen was a cheerleader, Carly was a swimmer. Her senior year she took first in State as her sister stood on top of the stands with the rest of them and screamed the loudest, cheering her on as she won on the final lap. Even though they were opposites there was never any rivalry between them, they were best friends. Jules completed the sisterhood by being a little more like Karen personality wise, but considered Carly her true best friend.

Steve, Craig and Jack all met the beginning of their junior year. It was Steve's first year at the new school and when he beat out the starting quarterback on the football team, Jack had become his wide receiver and Craig was his offensive guard. The three hit it off immediately and soon the six were inseparable. The only two who dated were Jack and Jules, who had been together since freshman year. The friendship among the other four became more like a family bond and none of them wanted to jeopardize the friendship. They all dated others who tried to implicate themselves into the tight-knit group, but eventually understood that that was impossible, and soon it would just be the six of them again. It had gone on that way until senior prom when Steve asked Carly.

Karen had offers months before and Jules had Jack. Steve knew of Carly's shyness outside the group and held off asking anyone until she had a date. He had been approached by a couple of girls who had hinted around that they were available, but he waited to see what would happen with Carly first. Two weeks before prom when most everyone was already hooked up he joked around at a party that they should go together. They both laughed it off at first, but by the end of the night, he had her convinced and the plans were set, they were going together.

His eyes moved to her image on the computer. She was just as beautiful as Karen but her body language was just the opposite. She had to have known she was pretty, but she couldn't bring herself to revel in it the same way that her sister did. It was almost as if she were uncomfortable in her own skin. He wondered if she was still like that. Thinking back now he remembered how she used to stay close to them at parties. She could be just as fun as Karen but in different ways. She was more like one of the guys than one of the girls. She could drink the three of them under the table and enjoyed the gross, dirty jokes. She would play in the touch football games unlike Karen and Jules, who would sit on the sidelines and cheer her on. His thoughts went back to prom night, standing by her front door at two o'clock in the morning dropping her off. They talked for a couple of minutes feeling slightly awkward for the first time all night. He smiled, remembering how he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do, kiss her or hug her; after all it was prom. The uncomfortable moment was interrupted as Karen opened the door after being dropped off a few minutes earlier.

"Hey, Dad says you have to come in," she announced with a wicked grin, "so hurry up and kiss before he comes out here and tells you to come inside." She closed the door again.

Carly didn't hesitate and quickly reached up and kissed him right on the lips. She might have said 'Goodbye' or something to that extent but all he could recall was wanting another one. He reached out before she had a chance to go inside.

"Wait," he whispered and pulled her back out by the hand and really kissed her.

He looked up over the computer as Danny entered the office.

"Geez," Danny chuckled, "what's with the smile?" He came around the side of Steve's desk setting some folders down. "You need to sign off on these."

Steve ignored the first comment, picking up a pen.

"Is that you?" Danny squinted, leaning over toward the picture.

"Yea, my senior year."

He whistled, admiring the girls, "Was that your girlfriend?" he pointed at Karen who had her arm around him.

"No. We were all just really good friends."

"Twins?" he said, giving him a look, "and you never hooked up with that?"

"I told you, we were just friends." He didn't feel like divulging he and Carly's relationship and then having to explain why they broke up if asked. He wanted to keep that to himself.

Danny looked closer, "Is that the guy that stayed with you a couple of years ago?"

"Yes. Craig." He signed the last report and closed the laptop.

"Where did the picture come from?"

"It's group of people I used to hang out with in high school. They want to get together next month someplace up by northern California."

Danny sat on the edge of his desk. "Are you going to go?"

"I don't know. Probably not."

"Why not?" he pushed.

"Because it's for two weeks and…" he raised his hands, "it's in California."

"So."

"So? Well that's a long time and it's along way."

"When was the last time you took a vacation?" he held his hand up before he could answer, "Wait I know. Never! Not one time since I've known you have you gone anywhere off this island."

"I went to Maui last year," Steve reminded him.

Danny rolled his eyes, "That was for two days. That's not a vacation. That's a weekend." He crossed his arms, "Do you not want to see these people?"

"It's more complicated than that."

"How so?"

Steve pushed back away from his desk and away from the interrogation, "It just is." He walked past him.

"Got some skeletons in the closet there?"

Steve turned around sharply, "Bad choice of words. Just drop it."

Danny nodded and shrugged," Ok."

* * *

Steve heard the knock on the front door and as he came around the corner of the kitchen he saw Danny walking in with a six-pack of beer and a smile.

"I thought you might be thirsty, so I stopped by."

"Well aren't you the Good Samaritan," he said crossing his arms, knowing that he was there because of their last conversation at the office. Sometimes he was a pain in the ass.

Danny set the beer on the coffee table and took two out, twisting off the top and handing him one. "It's about one of the girls in the picture isn't?"

Steve took the beer but didn't reply, giving him the stink eye, knowing he going to badger him to death.

"That's it, isn't it?" he lifted his beer like it was no big deal, "You were young. Did you get your heart broken by one of them?"

Steve picked up the six-pack and walked towards the backdoor, "Yes, but not in the way that you think." He knew he wouldn't get rid of him until he just came clean.

Danny followed him outside, grabbing the bag of chips sitting on the counter.

* * *

"Holy shit," Danny groaned, "I didn't know it was like that." He looked over at Steve who just stared out over the water. "I'm sorry man."

He just nodded slightly, acknowledging him, "Now you understand why it's not so easy for me to go."

"It doesn't seem to me that anyone blames you though, otherwise why would they invite you?"

"They don't, but I'm not sure I can face Carly, because I think she might."

"Do you really think they would set you up for an ambush?"

He looked at him peculiarly, "No!"

"I didn't think so." He shrugged, "Besides, this might be a good chance for some closure on the whole thing."

"It happened sixteen years ago. I closed it."

Danny huffed, "If you closed it, then you would have already bought your plane ticket and taken the days off."

Steve looked over at him annoyed, "Wow, that was a great diagnose Dr. Fraud."

"Thank you," he replied pulling out his cell phone and opening it to Google, "so are you going to fly Hawaiian or Alaska?"

Steve took a drink of his beer, "Hawaiian," he replied caving in. He really did want to see everyone, but was nervous about Carly. "Are you sure you don't want to tag along just to make sure I don't need another session?" he said sarcastically.

"Nah. I wouldn't want to interfere in your personal life."

"Oh no," Steve growled, "that would be so unlike you."


	2. Chapter 2

Steve got off the plane in San Francisco to a crowded airport. He followed the fellow passengers down to baggage claim and pulled out his cell phone waiting for the carousel to begin displaying the luggage. He flipped through Jules last email expressing her excitement that he was coming, giving him the address of Craig's cabin. It was almost two hundred miles away and it was probably going to take two hours just to get out of the city. He glanced around; trying to get eyes on the rental car shuttle when he sensed someone close behind him and then a voice over his shoulder.

"Hey, do you think Ms. Evans the Art teacher still goes commando?"

A smile spread across Steve's face before he even turned around. He knew exactly who it was.

"Jack!" he claimed, partly laughing at his statement and the other half just glad to see him. He dropped the small duffel bag on his shoulder and reached out hugging his old friend. "What's up Buddy?!"

Jack returned the hug as they slapped each other on the back once and then as guys do, quickly released as they both held their palm up in a 'bro' handshake, each still having a hand on the others shoulder.

"I knew that was you!" Jack laughed, "We just got in and we're picking up our luggage on the next row." He squeezed Steve's shoulder, "Jesus man, look at you?" he shook his head, "What do you eat nails for breakfast? You're made of iron!"

Steve laughed, "Rubber nails maybe." He looked around, "Where's Jules?"

"Ahh," Jack waved toward the bathroom, "she's got a peanut bladder and refuses to go on the plane."

Steve stepped back looking Jack over, "You look good!" He meant every word. His blond hair had no sign of gray or receding and his 5'10" frame showed that he kept active. He had always been a good-looking guy and age seemed to agree with him. Other than the natural aging of a few lines here and there, he was plain ole' Jack.

Jack patted his slight beer belly; "Yea well I spend more time on the baseball field coaching the boys than in the gym."

"That's more fun than the gym anyway." He went to ask him about the boys when he heard his name yelled from across the way in a high-pitched squeal. They both turned, as well as most of the crowd around them. Steve smiled at the 5'7" blond that clapped rapidly with excitement and then raised both her arms over her head like she was about to begin a cheer for the crowd. "Steve!" she yelled again.

Jack sighed, "Once a cheerleader, always a cheerleader."

Steve opened his arms, "Well, are you coming or not?"

She was just as he had remembered her. Her natural blond hair was shorter, shoulder length, but her figure had held up well for having three kids. She ran towards him with that same bright smile that made him feel like he just stepped back in time sixteen years. She flung her arms around his neck, as his arms went around her.

"Oh my god! I'm so glad you're here!"

"I could sense the threatening tone in your emails and was afraid you'd sent out a hit man if I didn't." he teased her.

They released each other and she stepped back, putting her hands on his biceps, "Damn, you look better than you did in high school! Hawaii suits you!" she turned toward her husband, "I love you Jack but I might spend a majority of the time attached to these." She joked, clinging to one of his arms with both of her hands.

Jack grinned at Steve, "You know I pride myself on giving my wife whatever she wants." He walked by slapping him on the back, "she's all yours Buddy."

Steve looked down at her, "A beautiful wife for two weeks and then I can give her back? Nice!" He looked beyond her, seeing his bag come around on the belt, "Hold on wifey, that's me over there."

Jules laughed and let go of him, moving over toward her husband who gathered their luggage on a carrier. As he made his way back she picked up his carry on that was over his shoulder, putting it on top of their stuff. "How are you getting to Craig's house?" she asked.

Steve motioned toward one of the car rental signs, "Renting a car."

"You should just come with us," she declared. "We reserved an SUV. There's plenty of room and we can catch up on the way there."

"Won't I need a car while I'm up there?"

"For what?" Jack jumped in, "We have ours. Craig will have one. Carly will have one, and her husband is coming up later so he'll have one. You're covered."

He shrugged, "Ok, if you guys don't mind. I'm good with that."

* * *

Jack turned off the freeway toward the direction of Lake Wildwood. They had made surprisingly good time getting out of town. The conversation had been geared toward what they had done over the last ten years and then his time in the Navy and a brief discussion of his Seal life, which to his pleasure neither one asked too many questions about. It was always uncomfortable when people would get personal with him, asking about missions and such. He didn't like talking about it even if he could, which he couldn't and most people had the common sense to realize that.

He decided to breach the subject he had been mostly avoiding and afraid to get into. "So," he said, sitting in the backseat of the SUV, "how's Carly doing? Last I heard she got married."

Jules turned in the passenger seat so she could see him. "Yes she did. About five years ago."

"What's he like?"

She looked over at her husband who gave her the stink-eye, "Jules, be nice."

"Of course," she said, slightly annoyed as if she didn't need him to remind her. She looked back and Steve and smiled, "He's an asshole."

"Jules!" Jack reprimanded as Steve laughed.

"He is Jack and you know it!"

He glanced at Steve in the rearview mirror. "He can be pretty obnoxious at times."

Jules rolled her eyes, "He's one of these guys that tries to be something he's not and laughs too loud at his own jokes."

"Is he good to Carly?" he asked, surprised that she would be with someone like that.

"I compare all men to my Jack," she rubbed his arm, "so no, he's not a good husband compared to him, but I guess she thinks he's good, so that's all that matters."

"Why would she marry someone like that?"

Jules got another warning glance from her husband.

"It's not like I'm talking to a complete stranger, Jack," she countered him. "It's Steve."

He concurred, "I guess you're right.  
Jules focused on the backseat again, "She was pregnant. They flew to Vegas and got married."

Steve's eyes lit up, "I didn't know she had kids."

"They don't. She had a miscarriage in her fifth month."

His faced showed a painful expression, "I'm sorry to hear that."

"I think she was more upset than Allan was. That's his name."

"Why does she put up with him?"

Jules gave him a look like he should already know that answer. "You know Carly, she never wants to hurt anyone. I don't think she wants to admit that she married him because she was pregnant, and he knows he's got it made with her. She's beautiful, smart and puts up with his shit."

"How often do you see her?"

"We get together a couple times a year." She smiled sweetly at him, "She asks about you every time, wanting to know if we've heard from you. How you're doing. She's really glad that you're coming on this trip."

That pleased him. "It'll be nice to see her too. I have to admit I was a little nervous about it. We haven't talked since Karen's funeral."

Jules reached back and touched him on the leg. "She doesn't blame you at all. That always worried her, that you would think that, or that you would blame yourself in some way. Which is ridiculous, because you did everything possible to save her."

"That's true," Jack jumped in, "You would have gone down with her if Craig and I hadn't wrestled you out of the water and then pinned you down. You did everything you could."

He forced a small smile for her as her motherly touch tried to ease him.

"It's Carly Steve, she really hasn't changed at all. You should be excited to see her. I know she is to see you."

He nodded, wanting to change the subject. "So how's Craig? Are you guys going to the wedding?"

"No," Jack replied, "It's in Barbados, too far for a weekend trip."

"Have you met her yet?"

"Not yet," Jules answered, "I've seen pictures. She's really pretty. Craig hasn't changed at all."

"Except the money," Jack chimed in.

"Money?" Steve asked.

Jack looked at him through the rearview mirror again. "Yea, I thought you guys got together a couple of years ago?"

"We did, but we didn't talk about money. He was in town on business but we didn't discuss it too much. It was right after his divorce. Why? Is he doing well?"

Jack and Jules both looked at each other and chuckled.

"What," Steve asked, "has he got a couple million or so?"

"More like seventy or eighty million," Jack said.

"Holly shit!" Steve laughed, "good for him! You'd never know it by talking to him."

Jules laughed with him, "Or looking at him. He still drives just a plain ole' Suburban, nothing fancy. Although;" she raised her finger, "the house we are going to is really nice. It's his summer-house."

Steve sat back in the seat, feeling more at ease. He was really glad he came. Danny was right, he needed a vacation and he was also right about needing closure on Karen's death. So far being with the two of them had settled some the uneasiness he had, but the first encounter with Carly was still weighing heavy on him.

* * *

Steve whistled from the backseat getting a look at the house for the first time as they made their way up the driveway. "Wow, that's nice! It's like a little resort." He leaned forward between Jack and Jules, looking out the windshield.

"I told you," Jules smiled, "we're going to have a great time!" She looked over at him, "Maybe we'll get a game of quarters going."

Steve grinned, sitting back, "Sure, I'd love to see you hammered again."

"She's been practicing," Jack warned.

Steve laid his head back laughing, "Ahh Jules, you never learn," he teased. "I've been taught to put a bullet through a hole an inch wide from a hundred yards away. I'm even better at tossing that coin in the cup than I was in high school."

Jack laughed with him, "She's convinced she can beat us."

"I'll take that challenge and I'll hold your hair back when you puke like I used to back then too."

Jack and Steve both cracked up over the memories of that one and then even louder when she didn't reply but gave them the finger.

They all got out, admiring the front door alone. The custom carved mahogany wood probably cost more than the cars they drove. Through the windows that ran vertical along side the door they got a glimpse of the lake that was behind the house, informing them the view from inside was going to be spectacular.

Jules flipped through the several keys in her hand that were all strung together on a ring. "I think it's this one." She held one up. "Craig sent me these, believe it or not they all go to something in the house or outside."

"He's not here?" Steve asked.

"No, not until later this afternoon or this evening. He didn't want us waiting around for him." She stuck the key in the lock to no avail. "Darn it." She flipped through another one as Jack reached down trying to take them. "I got it," she said, pulling her hand away.

"Then hurry," Jack snapped, "because I have to take a piss and I'm going to do it in his fancy bushes over there if you don't get that thing opened."

Jules and Steve both laughed, "Ok, relax. It's this one." She slipped it in and turned the lock, swinging the door open and letting him through first. "Go pee pee." She encouraged as if speaking to one of their kids.

He growled as he went in, scanning the house for a door that looked like it might have a toilet in it.

They both followed behind him and Jules pointed toward a hallway, "I bet it's that way." They watched him take off down the hall.

Steve walked into an open family room with windows facing out towards the water where a wall would normally be. The leather furniture and décor was nice but it wasn't what they were expecting. To the right was a large stone fireplace with a 60" flat screen TV on the wall above it.

"This is great!" Steve said looking around, "Judging from the front, I was expecting it to be really fancy in here, you know, expensive."

"Me too," Jules smiled, "It's really nice and comfy but it's a casual vacation nice. You boys won't feel like a bull in a china shop."

Steve agreed with a laugh, "Does that mean we are allowed to horseplay Mom?" He teased walking by her into the open kitchen that was on the left. The granite counter top ran the length of it and had seven bar stools tucked under. The cabinets were a dark maple and the appliances were all stainless steel as well as the oversized refrigerator. Beyond the kitchen and in front of the wall of windows on the far left was a dining room table that matched the wood from the front door that sat twelve.

Steve opened up the fridge and smiled, "Ah Craig. My hero." He reached in pulling out three beers from the stocked supply. He cracked one open, walking over to Jules and handed it to her.

"We're getting started already?" she said taking it, "I like it."

"Give me one of those," Jack said walking in and getting a good look at the great room for the first time, "This place is awesome! You should see the guest bathroom. It's bigger than our master."

Jules chuckled, "He rates places by the size of his throne, the toilet."

Steve handed him a beer, "I'm with ya buddy. They should design the bathroom and then build the house around that."

Jules held her beer up toward the lake, "To two weeks of sun and fun." She leaned against Jack, "and no kids."

"I'll drink to that!" he roared, "no kids!"

They unloaded their bags and picked their rooms. There were five to choose from upstairs, each containing its own bathroom and at least a queen's size bed. Steve settled on the first one he saw, not really caring, while Jules scoped out each one. She of course avoided the master, knowing that would be for Craig and his fiancé. After a push from Jack she finally settled on one two doors down from Steve with a nice view of the lake from the bed.

Steve set his bag on the bed and walked over to the window admiring the view, taking a drink of his beer. The back deck stretched along the length of the house with a built-in bench that ran along the railing and several lounge chairs that were set up. On the far end was a BBQ kitchen that would have made any man drool. On the opposite end was a large hot tub. The plush green grass stretched out on both sides of the house, stopping just before the forest took over and down to the water's edge. He leaned in to the window, looking on both sides for any sign of neighbors or another boat ramp, but saw no sign of either, it was pretty private. Halfway down the grass to the boat dock was a built-in fire pit. The dock had a boathouse that Steve was sure housed a boat and hopefully other toys as well.

He turned as Jack walked into his room, "Can you believe this place?"

"Pretty nice," Steve agreed.

"Summer home," he sighed, "Shit, I'm lucky if I get the kids to Disneyland once a year and maybe a trip the Grand Canyon."

"You should come to Hawaii," Steve suggested, "bring the kids. You can stay at my place. It's right on the beach. They'd have a ball."

He looked at him queerly, "Do you have any idea what you would be getting yourself into?"

"Yes," he blew off his warning, "I'm serious. You guys should plan it. All it would really cost you is plane tickets and spending money."

Jack tilted his head, beginning to give it a serious consideration, "I'll talk to Jules." He tapped his beer against Steve's, "Thanks."

"Sure." He looked over at him and snorted, "It's not like this place! So don't expect resort living, but I got an island to spread out on."

"That'll work."

They heard Jules from downstairs yell up.

"Someone just pulled up!"

Steve and Jack came outside just as Craig was coming around the front of his brand new black Hummer and his fiancé Marissa was sliding out of the passenger door. Her bleach blond hair laid perfectly straight down the middle of her back. She carefully adjusted the short dress she had on as she stepped down on the gravel driveway in her three-inch heels, removing her Prada sunglasses.

Jack leaned over to Steve, "That doesn't look like a Suburban too me."

"That's a Ferrari," he replied, commenting on his girl.

They walked up as Craig approached them with a big grin.

"I hope you guys have been making yourselves at home." He went to Jules first, giving her a bear hug, lifting her off the ground. His six-foot frame was slightly heavier than the last time Steve saw him, but Craig had always been a big, husky guy, which pleased him in high school since it saved his ass on several occasions from getting sacked with the ball. He was big, but he was fast.

Jules squealed and then laughed, "You give the best hugs."

He dropped her and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before turning to Jack and Steve, opening his arms and bending slightly over, "C'mon boys, you know you want one of Craig's hugs!" he said growling, don't make me chase ya down.

They both looked at each other, "I say we give him a taste of his own medicine," Jack suggested. Steve agreed with a nod. They both took off at the same time going low and each getting an arm around him, they lifted at the same time, hoisting him up on their shoulders so he was facing the opposite direction of them. Jules smacked him hard on the butt as it was sticking up.

"Holy Mother of God!" Craig yelled out, "put me down before ya break something!"

They set him down laughing. He reached out first grabbing Jack, "You bastard, I know Steve was in good shape but I was hoping you'd be getting the old man flab like me, no such luck!" He hugged him.

"What are you talking about, you look great!" Craig countered.

They released and he turned to Steve, cupping his hand on the back of his neck, "Jesus man, what do you workout five hours a day! You look better than you did two years ago."

Steve hugged him, "Hardly, but I'm pretty sure you can still kick my ass."

Craig laughed, "I wouldn't want to try." He let him go and motioned to his fiancé. "Come here sweetie."

She carefully made her way over in her heels, using her arms as a balancing tool, "We need to get this driveway paved," she whined.

"That's why you should wear more tennis shoes, baby," he said, shaking his head and taking her hand, helping her. He put his arm around her waist, smiling proudly, "This is Marissa. Baby, this is Steve," she shook hands with each person as she was introduced, "this is Jack and this little spitfire over here is Julie, or we like to call her Jules."

"Hi, hi, hi," Marissa smiled, flashing her perfect white smile and bashing her perfect lashes. She was pretty by Steve's standards and looked to be about maybe twenty-five, but the make up could be playing a part in that. It was hard to tell. She had high maintenance written all over, that was undeniable. Too him that left her at only pretty, beautiful would have been her in a natural state, like Jules. He had always been attracted to the girls that could play hard and sweat it out without having to worry that their lipstick didn't get smudge. He couldn't imagine this girl holding a football let alone throwing one.

"Congratulations on your engagement," Steve said.

She smiled sweetly at him, bashing her eyelashes. A maneuver he decided that she had perfected over time; it was a flirtatious move for his eyes only that made him slightly uncomfortable. "Thank you. You must be the ex water person."

Steve tilted his head, slightly confused, "I beg your pardon."

"You know," she looked at Craig for clarification, "what did you tell me?"

"Navy Seal honey," Craig rolled his eyes as she turned away.

"Oh yea!" she corrected, "A Navy Seal."

Steve nodded and just smiled, wondering what Craig saw in her. But he decided, to each his own.

They made their way into the house and Craig gave them a tour of the grounds, unlocking the various doors that held items he didn't want out in the open when the house was vacant. The boathouse was where the real fun was going to be. He had two jet skis that could hold at least three adults and a pontoon boat that he used to just cruise the lake.

"If anyone is interested, down at the dry dock is a ski boat too. I like to keep it out of the water because of algae build up. Might be a little cold but it's suppose to warm up starting tomorrow, so next week would be good." He turned to Jack, "Do you still ski Jack?"

"A bit," he replied, "A neighbor has a boat and we go out a couple of times in the summer."

"Yes, he can still ski, and he's good!" Jules jumped in knowing he was trying to be modest. "He can even wakeboard."

"Really?" Steve said surprised, "then next week for sure. I want to see that." They started back toward the house, "You always had good balance Jack. How you used to maneuver around those cornerbacks and get open sometimes was beyond me."

"Craig," Marissa yelled from the deck, "Someone just pulled up."

"It must be Carly!" Jules yelled, running up the lawn.

Craig and Jack both looked at Steve.

"What?" he snapped. "Its just Carly." He tried to hide the anxiety that was beginning to creep up on him.

"We know," Jack said passively, "it's just that you haven't seen her since, you know."

"Yeah I know," he sighed, "Why, does she look different?"

"No," Craig said, "but at first it's kind of weird to see her."

Steve looked between the two of them, "What do you mean?"

Neither one responded with an answer as they entered the house.

"You'll see," Jack said almost sadly.

Jules ran out and hugged Carly as she got out of her car. "I'm so happy to see you!"

"Me too! I've been so excited for this weekend!" She gave her friend one more tight squeeze before letting go. "I brought some of that wine that we had up at Napa a couple of years ago."

"Mmmm" Jules smiled, "Let's crack a bottle."

Carly was about to ask if he was there when she saw him coming out of the house behind Jack and Craig. She thought she was prepared to see him but the reality of it almost knocked her over. He was just as she remembered; the handsome face and kind eyes were just the same. He was only slightly taller and with more defined features. The teenage boy was now a man. She walked past Jules, locking eyes with him. The way he stared at her, she knew he was thinking of Karen. It had been sixteen years since she had seen or spoken to him. Of all the reunions she had with the group over the years, this was the one she felt most anxious over, but had also been the one she needed the most.

He stepped outside and was blindsided by the wave of emotions that swept over him when he saw her. He knew instantly what Jack and Craig were talking about. It was Karen. You couldn't help but see her in Carly. They had been identical twins and it was almost as if she were standing right there. He secretly wished the whole nightmare was a bad joke on him and Carly would appear next. He wasn't in the least bit prepared for this and wished they had warned him now. He felt his chest tighten as they locked eyes and she made her way to him. He didn't think he could speak to her. He couldn't remember anything he wanted to say. He felt almost sure he would break in front of everyone when she spoke to him.

"Hi," she said softly, only a few feet away.

He let out a breath and then took in a deep one. He did that two more times as she finally stood right before him. It was just like back in high school, he could tell them apart in just a matter of seconds. He didn't see Karen anymore, he saw Carly. A whole different set of emotions took over. It was as if he was on this crazy roller coaster that was taking him backward and forward. He could see the tears welling in her eyes and it almost sent him over the edge. He didn't say anything but just put his arms around her as hers' simultaneously went around his neck. She laid her head on his shoulder and he could feel a tear drip and slide down the inside of his shirt. He hugged her tighter dropping his head down on her shoulder too.

Jules motioned quietly for everyone to go in the house. Jack and Craig went in first as Marissa stood by the door.

"Where are you going, you haven't even introduced me to her yet?" she whined to Jack.

He gave her an annoyed look, taking her by the arm, moving her along with the others. "Later!" he whispered as Jules shut the door.

Carly slid her arms from around his neck and wiped her fingers under her eyes. "I'm sorry," she partly laughed, looking away from him, "It just seeing you again..." She shook her head not knowing it was going to hit her this hard. Karen's ghost was floating all around them.

Steve turned his head in the opposite direction and wiped his thumb and index finger over his eyes. "I know, me too." He looked back down at her. Her eyes were about level with his lips and as she turned back toward him he kissed her on the forehead, tightening his one arm that was still around her waist.

She reached up behind him, clutching his shoulder and rested her head on it. "I missed you."

"I thought about you a lot. There were so many times I wanted to call you," he sighed. "I just didn't know what to say, and then as time went on it just got harder."

She nodded against him knowing exactly how he felt. Now that it was over, it was like a huge weight had been lifted off of her. She hadn't felt this type of peace in a long time. It felt good just leaning against him. He had always been the one that she had been the closest too. Jack and Craig were special to her but not like Steve. They had the most fun together. He spent time at she and Karen's house on holidays. He knew their parents. They sat next to each other in classes. When they were together as a group they would automatically wind up next to each other whether it was at the movies, or in the car, or walking side by side. On camping trips they slept outside next to each other and would stay up most of the night talking. Even when one would bring a date they would still mindlessly sit together and then have to make the embarrassing correction. He loved the fact that as beautiful as she was she could still play like one of the boys, and she loved how he stuck up for her and would always pick her first in the games so she wasn't chosen last.

"I didn't think you were going to come," she leaned back looking up at him.

"I almost didn't." He suddenly felt regret for wasting the last sixteen years without seeing or talking with her, "I don't know what I was so afraid of."

"I don't either, but it's all out of the way now so let's not do it again." She stepped back and held her hand up, "Deal?"

He smiled and took a hold of her wrist, adjusting her hand position, "If we're going to shake on it, we're going to do a real shake not a lame ass business shake." He gripped her hand in a 'bro' shake like he would one of the guys.

She laughed as he shook her hand so her whole body moved with the motion.

Jules was right, he thought, she was exactly the same all the way down to that sweet laugh that he used to love to hear. She had the greatest laugh. He couldn't believe how much he had missed her. She didn't have a line on her face and her hair was just as long and black as it used to be, and her eyes, he had forgotten how he used to get lost in them sometimes when she talked to him. The emerald-green against the long black eyelashes was mesmerizing. "You look good."

"So do you," she grabbed ahold of his arms playfully and squeezed, "you're in better shape than you were in high school. They're huge! They're so big in fact that I think you could manage my luggage out of my car."

"What?!"

"Come on," she whined, "put those guns to good use."

"Nah, I can't over exert myself. I have to save my strength for the swim race."

She crossed her arms, "I am not going to race you."

"Oh yes you are," he demanded, "I've never been able to beat you Miss State Champ, but I think I'm ready."

She turned and walked toward her car, "Not going to happen," she sang out.

"Sometime in the next two weeks we are going to race. That is a guarantee." He reached around her into the trunk and pulled out her suitcases. "And this time I'm going to win."

"Only if I let you."

She leaned back and laughed as he growled at her while walking past carrying two of her bags in the house. He was just the same; it was as if no time had passed between them at all. Within minutes they were right back to where they used to be. It made her sad to think that she never had that type of playfulness with Allan. He just didn't respond to her in that way. If she had commented about letting him win the same as she did with Steve, he would have taken it offensively, even if it weren't meant that way. They had their good times though she reminded herself, even though they were becoming fewer and further in between. She just had to try harder. She had to make this marriage work. She was thirty-five years old and time was running out to have children. Allan was her husband and even though he had his flaws, she had hers as well. They weren't a perfect couple like Jack and Jules, she thought sadly. But who was? They had everything in a relationship that she strived for. She hoped being around them for the next two weeks with Allan would open his eyes to what their marriage could really be like. She had tried to mirror her parent's relationship but made the mistake of telling Allan that. He and her Father never really got along and the idea that she wanted him to be anything like her Father resulted in a fight that still hadn't been forgiven. She hoped Jules and Jack might be her salvation because she was running out of ideas.

Steve came back out of the house, with his arms held open, "Seriously, you're not even going to help me?"

She snapped out of her dilemma and glanced inside the trunk of the car. "Oh look, one left." She pulled out a small overnight bag she could have carried with two fingers. "Don't worry I'll get this one."

"Oh no, we wouldn't want you to carry too much and hurt yourself," he said sarcastically, "let me help you with that." He bent over and swiftly scooped her up, laying her over his shoulder.

Carly screamed with laughter, "Steve!"

"Don't worry yourself princess," he teased, "just putting the guns to use."

She relaxed holding the bag, "Hmm, do you think you could make your way to the kitchen and pour me a glass of wine too?"

He stopped, just before entering the house, "If you're thirsty, there's a lot of water in the back of the house. I could take you out there for a drink."

"No! No," she replied quickly, knowing he would probably do it, "just a lift into the house will be fine. Thank you."

"That's what I thought." He came inside and bent over setting her down. "Your highness."

She curtsied to him.

"Well it seems like the gang is officially back together now," Jules raised her wine glass from the counter. "Let the vacation begin."


	3. Chapter 3

Steve carefully tossed another log in the fire pit and sat back down in the chair next to Carly. The sun had gone down about an hour earlier and the fire was just big enough that a light jacket kept them warm. The consumption of beer and wine was helping with the chill as well.

"We need smores," Jules blurted out, reaching her glass up as Craig refilled it with red wine.

Carly moaned, "I'm stuffed from pizza, but you are absolutely right." She mirrored Jules invitation for a refill.

"I think I've got some marshmallows in the pantry," Craig mentioned, pushing himself out of the chair. "I'll be right back."

"God, I haven't had a smore in sixteen years," Steve said, agreeing with Jules.

"What do you mean," Jack said, "that wasn't part of your rations when you were a Seal?"

They all laughed at the idea of it.

"Nah, our fingers would be too sticky for basket weaving class."

That got another laugh.

Marissa looked over at him oddly, "They taught you how to weave baskets in the Seals?"

Steve looked at her and then glanced at Carly and the rest just to make sure he heard her correctly. By the looks on their faces too, he was pretty sure he had. "Um, no. It was just a joke."

"Oh, I thought that was kinda weird."

He had no comment for that and glanced over at Jack with an, 'are you kidding me,' stare as Jack openly bit his bottom lip trying not to laugh at her.

"So what do you do Marissa," Carly asked.

"You mean for work?"

"Yes."

She shrugged, "I used to answer the phones at Stevens, Porter and Kline Law firm, until I met Craig. Now I just plan the wedding."

"How did you two meet," Jules continued.

"His lawyer was Porter, from Stevens, Porter and Kline."

"How long have you known each other?"

"We've known each other for about a year, but it took him six months to finally ask me out. So we've been seeing each other for six months."

"That's a quick engagement," Steve commented.

She smiled over at him, "I guess he liked what he saw and just had to have it," she held her hands up, palms out as if putting herself on display. "You know what I mean, Steve?"

They all looked over at him; surprised she would say something so brass to him right in front of all of them, it felt like an open invitation.

"I do, it's kind of like jumping out of a plane," he never once took his eyes off of her. "At first it's really exciting, the view is so beautiful. You got your hand on the release feeling safe and just when you think it's the right time," he imitated pulling the cord, "Bang! The chute doesn't open and there you are free-falling, and that beautiful view suddenly turns on you and becomes like your worse nightmare. But then you come to your senses and remember there's a way out after all and pull your backup and poof it opens, and you fall nice and easily to the ground with the nightmare behind you." He smiled at her, "You know what I mean?"

She looked at him as if her brain were turning his story over and over in her head trying to decide if it was a compliment or an insult.

"I found some!" Craig said enthusiastically, walking up carrying a bag of marshmallows and some shish kabob sticks. "Not sure these will work, but we can give them a try."

Steve reached out, ignoring Marissa's deer in the headlights glare at him. "I'll take one."

* * *

Carly laughed and blew as hard as she could trying to put out the fire that had engulfed the white fluff on the end of her stick. It was quickly turning charcoal black. She was on her fourth glass of wine and feeling it.

Steve grabbed her wrist and blew on it with her, putting it out, "Don't put it in so far."

"Jules says that to me all the time," Jack blurted out.

They all busted up as Jules leaned over and playfully slapped his shoulder as he braced himself for the attack.

Carly leaned forward laughing so hard she dropped the marshmallow off the end of the stick without even knowing it. She pulled it back up to take a bite and it was gone. "Hey! Where did my marshmallow go?" she leaned over looking around at her feet. "It's gone! She looked over at Steve, "Excuse me officer," she giggled, "but can you help me locate my marshmallow?"

"Jack says that to me all the time," Jules retaliated.

The group busted up once again, but Carly fell back in her chair and laughed the hardest, which made everyone else laugh harder. She put her hand over her heart trying to calm herself but couldn't do it. She was having a giggle fit and it was the best feeling she had had in a long time. "Oh my God," she moaned, "I can't breathe."

"Ah, can you describe the missing marshmallow for me ma` am?" Steve asked in a professional manner, putting his arm around her that was holding his beer, trying to look down between her feet in the dark for it.

Carly wiped the tears from her eyes, "It's white but it's wearing a new black jacket," she chortled, trying to pretend like she was upset, "I was good to that marshmallow and now it's gone."

Steve looked up at her laughing, "You burned the shit out of it, no wonder it jumped ship."

She put her hand on his back and started cracking up all over again. "I have to go to the bathroom," she said between gasps.

He leaned back, "Are you telling me or warning me?"

She started laughing again, "I'm telling you so stop making me laugh!"

He stood up and held his hand out to her. "Come on, don't fall in the fire and end up like your marshmallow that's on the run."

She giggled, taking his hand. "Whoa," she steadied herself against his arm as she stood up.

"Careful Carly," Jules and the others said.

"I got her," Steve reassured them. "Give me this," he took the glass of wine from her hand, handing it to Jack.

"Just like high school, too much too soon," Jack reminded her, "and good ole' Steve to your rescue."

"Hey, those roles were reversed a couple of times too," she corrected, looking at Steve for absolution, "Am I right?"

He nodded, "Yes you are." He moved his chair out of her path, "Come on tipsy."

She pointed down at Jack teasingly.

* * *

Steve sat on the top step of the deck waiting for her. He checked over his phone for any messages and glanced over his shoulder when he heard her come back out.  
"Feel better?"

She put a hand on his right shoulder as she took a seat next to him, "Yes, but I have something to show you."

"What?"

She lifted her right leg and crossed it over her left knee, pointing to her ankle, "Look."

Stuck to her sock was the missing black marshmallow.

The group turned as they heard the laughter coming from the deck. Steve was laid out on his back and Carly had her head on his leg, both were in a fit of uncontrollable bliss.

Craig turned back toward the fire, smiling, "They haven't changed."

"Remember how they used to have to get up and leave the theater sometimes because they'd be giggling so much?" Jules recalled.

"I always thought they'd end up together," Jack added.

"They were," Jules reminded him sadly, "for a while." She smiled over at Craig, "Maybe that's why Steve never got married. He's looking for someone like Carly."

"Stop!" Jack insisted, "Don't start with that."

"With what?"

"You know what I'm talking about?" he gave her a look, "Maybe Steve's not married but Carly is, so keep your nose out of it."

"I'm just making an observation."

"Keep your opinions to yourself."

"It doesn't matter anyway," Craig jumped in, "Steve was never the type of guy to mess around with someone else's girl. I can't imagine his priorities on that subject have changed. No matter what the situation," he added, giving Jules the same look as her husband.

"Ok, ok," she caved.

Marissa looked over at the two of them sitting on the deck. After what Craig just said she was pretty sure now the whole story of the parachuting was an insult to her. She wasn't used to men not reacting positively to her flirting; she suddenly didn't find him as attractive as she did before. "Asshole," she thought.

Steve sat up, wiping the tears from his eyes, "Oh my god, Carly," his shoulders shook as he tried to focus on the marshmallow stuck to her sock. She held on to his shoulder with her foot still propped up on her knee.

"Get it off!" she snorted, holding on to him for support.

"Stop moving!" he retorted.

"I'm not, you are."

He grabbed a hold of her shin and pulled it off, holding it up, "Mystery solved."

She looked at him with the most serious face she could conjure up. "You are an awesome Detective!"

"I do my best for the people that need it the most ma'am."

"And you know that's me," she giggled.

"Some people just can't control their marshmallows, there's no shame in that."

She smiled at his playfulness, leaning back against her hands, "Do you like being a Police Officer?"

He shifted his body so he was leaning back against the railing so he could see her, "Yes."

"I bet you're very good at it."

He shrugged modestly, "I have a good team; we feed off each other and get things solved."

"A team?" she said impressed, "not just a partner?"

"Well, technically I do have a partner, Danny Williams. He's a great guy." His voice imitated a gangster, "He's from Jersey."

"Jersey!" Carly chuckled, "You two couldn't have grown up any further apart than that."

"You have no idea."

"Was he a Seal too?"

Steve laughed out loud at that, "No! He hates that part of me more than anything else."

Her expression turned concerned, "Do you get along?"

"Oh yeah, like brothers," he said proudly, "We can drive each other crazy sometimes but at the end of the day I'd take a bullet for him, and I know he'd do the same for me."

Her eyes shot open over that statement, but then she considered whom she was talking too. She sat up and shifted so she was facing him. He had modeled his life around helping other people who couldn't help themselves; it wasn't something he was taught after joining the Navy either, she knew that first hand. It was just apart of who he was. She looked right at him as her smile faded; replaced by an overwhelming regard for who he really was, it went beyond respect. Her voice was full of wonderment at the selflessness he displayed that day sixteen years earlier for her sister. "You were going risk your life and swim down under those rocks to try to save her…weren't you?"

Her question floored him. She could see it all over his face in the blink of an eye.

He didn't feel he deserved the recognition for that, because that's not what happened. He had lost the grip on her hand, that's what he agonized over, not that he had tried to rectify his mistake by going after her but was restrained. It took him a long time after that to forgive Craig and Jack for what they did. He knows now why they did it, because he would have done the same thing if it were one of them.

It was a hopeless, tragic event that changed his life forever. He was falling in love with Carly at the time of Karen's death and often wondered what would have happened if things had turned out differently. But it didn't matter now; he had let them both go.

"Steve," she slid one of her hands in his, "I didn't mean to upset you."

He looked down at her hand as she held it, her delicate fingers trying to comfort him. He looked up at her and saw Karen staring back at him like a ghost telling him it was ok. He squeezed her fingers not sure which one of the two he was confessing too, "I had her hand and I let go," he shuttered, "I'm so sorry."

"You didn't let go!" Carly said angrily, "The water pulled her away. You never would have let go."

"It all happened so fast," he said mournfully, "it all happened so fast." He cast his eyes down away from her, "I couldn't face you at the funeral. I didn't know what to say."

She scooted closer to him, "That was a hard day for everyone. I wanted to find you but I just couldn't bring myself to come downstairs. It wasn't because of you, Steve."

She broke his heart, but he didn't want to tell her that. He put that to rest years ago; especially after he found out she was married. He was relieved to hear that she didn't blame him. The others had told him that same thing over and over but none of that mattered until she said it herself. It was the real closure he was looking for.

"After the funeral, I saw you from my bedroom window talking to my Dad outside in the backyard. Do you remember that?"

He nodded, "Vividly."

"What did he say to you?"

"I was standing with Jack and Craig and he pulled me aside." He clearly remembered that moment, and how nervous he was, thinking the worse, "I remember him putting a hand on my shoulder and telling me how grateful he was that I tried to save his daughter."

Carly put a hand over her mouth, picturing the two of them standing there and never knowing that's what was said.

"I started to get really upset and tried to apologize but he wouldn't have it. He wouldn't let me say it. He told me that he trusted my abilities and that I did everything I could and sometimes things happened for a reason that we weren't meant to understand. It was in God's hands and we just had to trust him." Steve sighed, "And then he gave me a hug and walked away."

Carly pulled the collar of her shirt up and wiped her eyes and nose on it, "My Dad always liked you so much," she sniffed, "He still asks about you. How you are, if I've heard from you." She smiled, "When I told him that you had joined the Seals and made it, he wasn't surprised, but I could tell he was so proud of you. I think that if he ever had a son, you would have been what he hoped for."

"Geez Carly," Steve said humbly, "that's probably the nicest compliment I've ever got."

"It's true. He was so happy when he found out I was going to the prom with you."

Steve chuckled, "I know, he let me take his Mustang, remember?"

Carly reached out again and touched him on the leg, "That's right! He let us take his car. He loved that car. I forgot about that. And remember the time you, me and Karen were watching that movie up in my room, and all three of us fell asleep on my bed?"

"I thought we were in so much trouble," he laughed nervously, "but they never said a word."

She shook her head knowingly, "Because it was you. If it would have been anyone else, we would have been in big trouble for having a boy upstairs, but they trusted you in their house."

"Ok," he put his hand up, "that's enough. I won't be able to get my head through the opening of my shirt tomorrow."

She smiled sweetly at him.

"Well now he has a son for real," he reminded her, "a son-in-law."

Carly huffed and almost laughed in his face, "They don't get along. Let's just leave it at that."

He felt bad for her about that, knowing how much she respected her father. "I'm Sorry."

"Yeah well, Allan can be difficult sometimes," she admitted and then quickly defended him, "He can be critical of himself and sometimes he tries to compensate for that in other ways and comes across…" she tried to think of the right word, "cocky."

Steve nodded like he understood. "When is he coming?"

Tomorrow. He's up in San Francisco on business and is driving down after."

"What does he do?"

"He's a sales rep for a pharmaceutical company." She smiled, "A cop and a drug pusher. I hope you two get along."

Steve chuckled at her joke, but in hindsight she really didn't say it to be funny. She knew before Allan even got there that he was going to have issues with Steve. He had already made a big deal about him being a Navy Seal, and just seeing him again and his physical appearance, Allan was going to be jealous. She was glad now that she had never told him that they had dated briefly. She also hoped that he would ease up on his drinking that had become another strain on their marriage. She felt bad for him and understood why he did the things he did, even though others didn't. He had been so mentally beaten down by his Father that it left him unsure of his own self-worth. He was constantly trying to prove himself to others, especially those he felt threatened by. She had begged him to go to therapy and he did for a while, but considered it a waste of money and claimed the Doctor didn't get him or know what he was talking about. She never mentioned it again.

"I look forward to meeting him, " Steve said truthfully. He really was. After reconnecting with Carly and seeing how great her sense of humor and sweetness hadn't changed, he couldn't imagine that her husband was as bad as Jules and Jack claimed. He just couldn't imagine her with someone like that. At least he hoped he wasn't. She deserved someone who would appreciate her for what she truly was, 'perfect,' he thought.


	4. Chapter 4

Steve sat down in the chair he had used the night before next to the fire pit. He took a drink of his coffee before setting it down in the grass. He leaned back, pulling his cell phone out of his shorts pocket and brought up Danny's cell number.

He answered on the fourth ring just before it went to voice mail. "You do realize there is a two-hour time difference," he yawned.

Steve looked at his watch. "It's seven you should be up by now."

"My boss is on vacation. I'm taking it easy."

"Slacker."

Danny poured the milk in his bowl of Fruit Loops and opened the drawer at his hip, pulling out a spoon. "So how's wilderness life? Have you taught everyone how to kill a deer with a bow and arrow and then skin it?"

"Nah, that's after lunch. We drank a lot last night though."

Danny laughed, "Good! So you're having a good time?"

"Yes, thanks for talking me in to it."

He leaned over the counter so as not to drip milk on his shirt and took a bite of cereal, talking with his mouth full. "Have you seen the girl yet?"

"Carly? Yea, she got here yesterday. She's exactly the same. Funny, sweet. I swear to god my stomach hurts today from laughing so much last night."

Danny smiled, liking the sound of that. "How does she look?"

Steve glanced over his shoulder making sure he was alone, "Jesus Danny I'm telling ya, she looks better than she did in high school."

He liked the sound of that even more, remembering her picture. "Have you met her husband yet?"

"No, he's supposed to be getting here sometime today. Jack and Jules said he's a real tool, but I don't know. I can't picture her married to someone like that."

"Well, I guess you'll find out."

"I guess so." He took a drink of his coffee and saw Craig walking toward him. "Good morning,"

Craig motioned with his hand toward the boathouse, whispering to him, "Hey, when you're done will you give me a hand getting the boat out?"

"Sure." He spoke into the phone to Danny, "I got to go. I'll call ya in a couple of days."

"Hold on! You didn't tell me, so did you talk to her about…you know her sister?"

"Yes. We did last night. It went really well. We both got some things off our chest. It reminded me of old times. She's so easy to talk too. I feel really comfortable with her."

Danny pulled the phone away from his ear and looked at it, hearing something in his voice. He put it back up, "Hey."

"What?"

"She's married."

Steve expression showed irritation. "Thanks for the news, but I think I'm the one that told you that."

"I'm just saying."

"I have no interest in that Danny, besides she feels the same way about me. We're friends."

"That' s how it always starts out, be careful of the friends card."

"Thanks for the advice," he said sarcastically. "I'll be expecting a bill in the mail for your services."

"One more piece of advice for ya,"

"What's that?"

"Even if she's unhappy in this marriage, that doesn't give you permission."

"All right!" he growled, "I get it. I'll call you in a couple of days."

* * *

Steve entered the boathouse as Craig was just opening the garage style door that led out to the lake. The pontoon boat was about twenty feet long and had a row of cusioned seats that ran along each side. There was a ladder in the middle that went up to the top deck that was used for sunning. Craig was under the hood that led to the engine compartment, which was located toward the back of the boat.

"What do you want me to do?" Steve asked.

"Do you know about boats?"

"I live on an island surrounded by water. I know a little," he smiled.

Craig leaned his head to the side of the cover so he could see him, "Smart ass."

He squatted down next to him, "What's the problem?"

"Last time we were here, we couldn't get it to start. It sounds like it's going to turn over, but won't."

"When was the last time you had it running?"

Craig narrowed his eyebrows contemplating that question, "About two summers ago."

"It's probably the gas."

Craig looked up at him; "There's gas in it."

"I know but if it sits for too long, the gas can go bad. You should drain it and then refill with fresh."

"Ok," he said satisfied with his knowledge, "my next question. How do you drain the old gas?"

Steve stood up and leaned over the back of the boat. "There should be a plug in the back but it's probably under the water line."

"So we hoist it up." Craig declared, jumping over the side.

The boat lift was angled so the front end was hirer than the back. He and Steve held a bucket over the drain hole as the gas poured in.

Craig glanced over at him, "So what do you think of Marissa?"

"She's a pretty girl."

"Yes she is," he agreed. "Is that all?"

"Well I really haven't had a chance to talk to her. She seems really nice, friendly."

"She can be a bit of a flirt too, so beware."

Steve wondered if he had been aware of that, I guess that answered his question. "Does it bother you?"

Craig shrugged, "I think it makes her feel powerful." He looked over his shoulder, making sure they were alone, "She's not the sharpest tool in the shed, if you know what I mean."

Steve laughed, but didn't comment. It was better to just listen than make an opinion when talking to a buddy about their lady. Comments could come back and bite you in the ass.

"She has her looks and even in a room full of intelligent women, she gets the attention." He glanced around again, "Plus, she's great in bed. I mean she's crazy good."

Steve laughed again. "Well there you go, that's half the battle right there. Congrats."

They pulled the bucket away and Craig stuck the plug back in. "What do we do with the old gas?"

"Dump it in the empty gas can and take it to the boat dock where you get your gas and they should be able to dispose of it for you."

Craig stood up and slapped him on the shoulder, "I'm glad you came along. I probably would have paid someone $1000 to just empty out the old gas."

"And I'm only going to charge you a beer."

"Deal," Craig agreed.

They filled it with five gallons that he had in the garage and Craig backed it out of the boathouse, preparing to take it to the main dock for a fill up. Craig stood at the controls while Steve sat across from him with his legs stretched out in front of him, feeling relaxed. They began to pull away as Carly came down the dock, wearing a pair of cut-off jeans and a tank top.

"Hey, where are you guys going?" she yelled out.

Steve stood up, going to the edge, "To the main dock for gas. Do you want to come?"

"Yes." She kicked off her flip-flops.

Craig went to put the boat in reverse when she surprised both of them by diving into the water and swimming over. Steve looked over at him and they just shook their heads. That was Carly.

She grabbed the ladder that was built into the side of the boat and started to climb up when Steve leaned over, taking her hand and easily pulled her up the rest of the way.

"That felt good!" she laughed, pulling her hand over her ponytail, draining the excess water from it.

"I think you're still drunk," Craig said, tossing her a towel.

She looked over at Steve who had the same wondering expression on his face.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing crazy. I mean Carly." He dodged her hand and sat back down.

"It's going to be a beautiful day," she smiled brightly as Craig steered the boat out into the open water.

Steve watched her profile as she began to dry off her long tanned legs. She ran the towel down one and then slowly back up the other. As she stood up her tank top stuck to her body, showing off her spectacular figure. She wasn't too thin but athletic. Her shoulders were defined and showed that she still swam on a regular basis. Her breasts were full and he could see the tops of them coming out from her bra through the wet shirt. The shorts came just below her butt, which was also perfectly round and firm. He glanced over at Craig who was watching him enjoy the show.

Craig raised his eyebrows at him, nodding. Steve felt like he'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "What?" he mouthed too him, "I'm a guy."

Craig mouthed back, "She's a woman."

They both laughed as Carly turned around and caught them. "What," she demanded, glaring back and forth between them? "What were you saying?"

Steve shrugged his shoulders pretending like he didn't know what she was talking about.

"Steve was checking out your legs," Craig blurted out.

He shot him a look, "Seriously dude?!"

"You were. Would you have rather me told her you were checking out her breasts too?"

Steve felt like his whole body turned a crimson shade of red. "Wow!" he looked at Carly, "Did you happen to get the number of the bus that just ran me over?"

She plopped down next him with a wicked smile on her face, "So you like the goods huh?" She couldn't help but torment him.

"I was just…" he stuttered, "you know," he motioned to where she had been standing, "you were right there in front of me."

"Oh, so you couldn't help but look?"

"Yea!" he looked at Craig for help who was going to do nothing of the sort. He was enjoying it as much as Carly was.

"So if I was standing over there drying off," she pointed toward the other side, "you wouldn't have looked?"

"Probably not," he lied.

She crossed her arms, "Why not? You don't think I look good enough to glance over another fifteen feet? It's only worth your while if I'm right there in front of you?"

He looked at her confused, "Yes. I mean, no! You look really good." He was trying to dig himself out of a hole that Craig had dug and she had thrown him into, "I mean, I'd look. I guess. I don't know. What do you want me say?!"

She and Craig both busted up.

"You guys are cruel."

Craig imitated him in a slow, dense voice. "Yes, no, I don't know." He laid his head back laughing, "You're real smooth with the ladies aren't you?"

"Shut the hell up!" he laughed with him. He glanced over at Carly who didn't say anything but just stared at him with a satisfying smile.

She was beyond flattered and even a little excited by the fact that he still saw her that way. It made her feel young and sexy, which she hadn't felt in a while. She wrapped the towel around her body and sat back next to him. She leaned over just a tad and whispered to him, "Thank you for looking, it's always nice to be admired."

"You're welcome," he whispered back, "the pleasure was all mine."

She wasn't expecting that and she blushed this time, rolling her eyes.

* * *

Each individual filled the lounge chairs on the deck that afternoon. Jack was sleeping; Jules and Carly were sharing People magazines, passing them back and forth. Craig was reading a book and Marissa had her headphones on. Steve was just sitting, looking out over the lake and enjoying doing nothing.

He watched Carly and Jules as they commented on the celebrities in the magazine, saying whom they liked and whom they didn't. He thought it amusing that they acted as if they truly knew that person to form an opinion. He put his hands behind his head, studying them. Women could be such odd creatures to him. He had been trained to interrogate people and know the way the mind worked when a person is feeling threatened or how to handle them when they are aggressive, but he had never been able to figure out the logical mind of a woman. They were so different from men it was like night and day. Even Kono, he thought to himself. She was one that he thought he knew pretty well, but then at the drop of a hat, she would floor him and leave him wondering.

Jules said something funny and Carly laid her head back and laughed. There it was again, that laugh. He caught himself smiling without even realizing it. She had that ability.

Jules glanced up over the top of her magazine, noticing his attention on them. He had a slight grin on his face with his arms still tucked behind his head.

"Enjoying yourself?" she asked.

"I'm entertained by you two and the way you comment about the people in those magazines."

The two women looked at each other, curious over his statement.

"How so?" Carly asked.

"You act as if you know them or that they are attainable."

"They could be," Jules said hopeful.

He laughed, "In your dreams."

"Hey!" she barked out defensively holding up the magazine, "There are at least five people in here that Jack has given me a free pass for. Don't ruin that for me!"

Carly gave her a high-five, "You go Jules! I truly believe that you will run into Bradley Cooper at the grocery store and he will fall madly in lust with you and want you immediately in the backseat of his truck."

"Thank you Carly," she glanced over at Steve giving him the stink eye.

"Oh yea," he defended himself, "that's really going to happen, and monkeys might fly out of my butt."

Jules looked disgusted over at him while Carly roared with laughter.

"So you don't have any fantasies?" Jules asked sarcastically.

"Well, if I came home from work sometime and there was a beautiful woman cooking dinner for me in my kitchen, wearing nothing but an apron, that would be ok."

"You mean Angelina Jolie, don't you?" she tried to trap him into admitting he was just as bad.

"Nah, too much maintenance. I'd much rather have the girl next door."

"Amen brother," Jack blurted out with his eyes still closed.

"Right Jack!" Jules rolled her eyes, "If Angelina Jolie was in our kitchen naked, you would pass out from excitement."

He opened one eye and slid off his lounger, crawling over to her on his hands and knees, "Angelina Jolie," he snuffed, crawling up on her lounger with her, "she's nothing compared to my wife." Jules put her arms around him as he laid his head on her chest.

Carly watched the sweet display between the two of them, missing Allan; even though she couldn't imagine him ever doing what Jack just did. A public display of affection was something he never took part in. It never really bothered her until she was around other couples that were affectionate, especially when she would see an old couple holding hands in public. Sometimes it made her sad. She had learned to live with it, but she often worried that he would be that way with their children as well, and that she would never get used too. Before she could finish her thought her phone rang. She reached down next to her chair seeing Allan's number on it.

"Hi! Are you almost here?" she asked excitedly and then in the same breath her face turned disappointed. She got up and walked down the steps to the yard. "Why not?" she asked as the conversation moved out of hearing distance of the others on the deck.

Jack lifted his head, looking up at Jules, "Don't say it."

Her irritated expression said it for her, but she couldn't help voicing it too. "He's going to stand her up again."

"Stand her up?" Steve asked as if he was surprised that it seemed to happen on a regular basis. Who stood up their wife? And why would you stand up your wife?

"Yes, he can be famous for this."

Steve looked down by the lake as Carly spoke on the phone to her husband. By the sound of the conversation before she left and Jules announcement it was clear that her husband might not be coming. Part of him was glad, which surprised him. He had been enjoying his time with her and not necessarily wanting to share it with someone else, even if it were her husband. It was a selfish thought on his part, but he didn't care, which surprised him again.

Carly came walking back up on the deck, sitting on the edge of her chair, speaking to Jules, "He's not coming until the day after tomorrow."

"How come?"

Carly shrugged, "There's a convention or something going on in Sacramento that he wants to go too. New client prospects I guess."

She tried to sound positive about it, but everyone around her knew it was a put-on.

Craig set his book down on his chest, hoping to lighten the mood. "Hey you know what? There's a great bar and grill just up the road about half a mile. We should walk over and have dinner, a couple pitchers of beer, play some pool. They have a dart board too."

"That sounds like a great idea!" Jules said, reaching over touching Carly's arm, "it'll be fun."

Carly nodded, keeping her eyes only on Jules, feeling slightly humiliated that her husband would have rather spent time at a convention with a bunch of strangers than on a vacation with her. It wasn't so much why he was not coming, but the way he told her. It was very cold and very direct as if telling her it were set in stone and there would be no discussion. She could almost smell the liquor on his breath through the phone as well, which bothered her even more.

* * *

Carly trailed behind Steve and Craig on the way to the bar as they traded deep-sea fishing stories. They talked easily to one another, neither one trying to dominate the conversation. She loved that about the three men she was on this vacation with. They all seemed so easy-going and relaxed, comfortable with themselves just like they were back in high school.

Her eyes focused on Steve. He had on a pair of black and white basketball shorts, a white T-shirt and Nikes. Simple, but somehow he made it seem fashionable, like he had just stepped out a of GQ photo shoot. His hair from behind was neatly kept but she could see he was almost ready for a cut due to the ends that were beginning to curl just slightly. His build was just as impressive from behind as it was standing in front of him. He had a casual swagger when he walked, that drew her eyes down to his backside, which she believed to be just as muscular as the rest of him. She slowly moved up his body to his shoulders that were defined and sculptured. She could see his body flex without even trying as he moved his arms back and forth as he walked. Her eyes drifted to his hands and her thoughts to what they would feel like on her body. He was so strong but she knew somehow his touch wouldn't be. It never was when they were young, she remembered fondly. He was a good kisser, although they didn't get to do their share since the relationship didn't last very long. She compared him to Allan whose kisses had become short and to the point, even during sex lately they were sometimes avoided all together.

She scanned the whole package again, her fantasy moving from his hands on her, to his whole body on her. She looked away quickly, scolding herself. 'Stop! You're just mad at Allan. He's working trying to make a good living and here you are fantasizing about another man. Steve of all people.'

"Hey."

She heard his voice and looked up as he and Craig had both stopped, looking back at her.

As she approached next to him, he put an arm around her shoulder, "Come on pokey."

They began walking again but he didn't remove his arm. She was between them as they continued on with their conversation. She felt his hand slide down from her shoulder and gently caress her back. He looked beyond her to Craig, fully engaged in a conversation about some tuna he had caught or something. He was completely oblivious to the way in which he was touching her; it was just as natural to him as walking. She on the other hand was reveling in the moment.

As they walked through the parking lot to the entrance, to her regret, he removed his hand and stepped in front of them to hold the door open. He and Craig were still talking only now it was Craig's story about a marlin off the coast of Mexico. Steve motioned to Jules, Jack and Marissa who had already occupied a table in the back.

Steve pulled a chair out in front of Carly and was laughing at Craig's hand movement as he described reeling in the fish. She waited for him to sit down so she could get to the one on the other side. Craig walked around him taking a chair by Marissa. Steve finally looked up at her.

"Are you going to sit?"

"Oh," she said surprised, "is that for me?" another trait that Allan had lacked. She had forgotten how the little things were sometimes the most impressive.

"Yes, or you could sit at the bar," he said with a teasing smile.

She took the seat, graciously bowing to him, "Thank you."

* * *

Six burgers, two orders of wings and a pitcher of beer later, they sat feeling satisfied hunger wise. Carly looked across the room at a jukebox. She reached behind her chair and suddenly realized she had forgotten her purse.

"Oh my gosh," she laughed, uneasily, "I didn't bring my purse."

Craig raised his hand, "I know the owner, he'll let you wash dishes and you could buss our table."

"I didn't bring mine either," Jules announced like it was not a big deal.

"Yes, but you have a husband here."

Steve put his arm around her, "I'll be your husband, if I have too," he volunteered like he was doing her a huge favor.

She smiled over at him with her hand out, "Ok hubby, I need some money for the jukebox too."

Jack and Craig both enjoyed that gesture.

"And they never want anything in that hand except for money," Jack whined.

"Ahh," Jules rubbed his back soothingly, "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy."

Steve pulled his wallet out of his pocket, opening it up. He flipped through some twenties until he came to a five, taking it out. "Here."

Carly went to take it and he pulled it back.

"Only one thing you have to promise."

"What?" she asked.

"No country music."

"Do you consider the Eagles country?"

"Of course not."

She took the money and noticed a picture in his wallet of a young girl. She looked at it and then at him, wondering if he had a daughter but just never said anything. "Who is that?" she asked, pointing at the photo.

"That's Gracie. My Partner's daughter."

Carly was intrigued, "You keep a picture of her in your wallet?"

"Let me see," Jules leaned over, giving him the same surprised look.

"Yes," he wasn't sure why they thought that unusual. "She's a great kid. We're pretty close. Danny's divorced and he doesn't do water and we live on an island so I take her surfing and snorkeling. We went hiking a couple of weeks ago. This is pretty recent." He took it out, "They just had school photos taken."

Jules reached for the photo, "That's so sweet of you."

"I know, isn't it?" Carly agreed as they admired Gracie's picture. "She's adorable."

He never thought of it that way, it was just Grace, and he had just as much fun with her as she had with him.

"Ahh," Jack tormented him, "Isn't that sweet! Steve is such a sweet guy. What a sweetheart."

Craig joined in, "I bet that's a picture you cut out of a magazine. There is no such thing as a Gracie, is there? You just use it to attract women."

"Yea ok," Steve laughed, "I'm busted. Now I'm going to have to find a new strategy to use to pick up on women."

Jules handed him the picture back as she stood up, "I doubt very much that you have any problems picking up women." She motioned toward the jukebox, "They're just jealous. C'mon Carly let's see what they have for music." She turned to Marissa who had been quiet most of the afternoon. "Come with us."

Craig nudged her to go, hoping she would begin to interact more with the group.

"Ok," she said, but it sounded more like saying yes to a chore.

When they were out of hearing distance Jack leaned over the table, "So are you seeing anyone?" he smiled cunningly, "or are you seeing many? C'mon truthfully, you get laid on a regular basis don't you?"

"Oh yea," Steve huffed, "I have revolving front door and a secretary that keeps them all scheduled."

"Seriously man. Throw me a bone here. I've been with Jules since my freshman year in high school. It's no secret I've never been with another woman. You're the only guy I know that I can live vicariously through. All the others are either married, and I don't want to hear about cheating, or they're lucky if they get laid. You on the other hand, Christ they must be lining up," he snorted. He used his fingers to count off Steve's attributes, "You live in Hawaii, which is like a utopia. You're a cop, which is just as good as a firefighter. You're an ex Navy Seal. And let's not forget the obvious, you look like a fucking movie star."

Steve looked over at Craig and they both laughed over his fantasy of his life.

"I'm starting to think that maybe you want to date me, Jack," he smiled.

He got the finger for that.

"No way," Craig shook his head, "Steve's a one woman kind of guy, always has been always will be." He looked over at him, "Am I right?"

Steve lifted his hands up in defense, "I'm not saying a word. I actually kind of like both of your scenarios. I'm going to live vicariously through your perceptions."

"Seriously," Jack badgered him, "when was the last time you got laid?"

"Probably longer than you," he admitted.

Jack and Craig both gave him a look, like c'mon give us something.

He looked over his shoulder not wanting the ladies, or actually just one in particular to hear. "About two months ago. I met her at an event. She was a friend of a friend and she was on vacation from Boston. We got to know each other and spent a few days together before she left. She didn't leave a number or an address." He raised his hands, "But that's not a usual case for me at all. It was just a mutual attraction between two adults."

Jack sat back in his chair, "So you spent two days screwing each others brains out?

Steve just smiled not answering, even though that was pretty much what happened. He also didn't mention that before that it had been almost seven months since he'd been with a woman. His life wasn't like what Jack thought at all; it was more in comparison to Craig's idea. He didn't like one night stands or even the casual liaison like with the girl from Boston. It was a quick fix for an urge that any red-blooded male needed, but it wasn't satisfying emotionally. He'd spent the majority of his years traveling from country to country in uniform, but was never in one place long enough to build a relationship with anyone. Even after moving to Hawaii he'd never dated anyone that he really felt the urge to settle down with. Not that the urge wasn't there, it just didn't nag at him like he thought maybe it should have. He wanted kids, family, but that one person that could fulfill that desire just eluded him, for now.

"You know Jack," Steve started, "you and Craig, you got it pretty good too."

Jack looked over at Jules as they sorted through the catalog on the jukebox, "I know, I really lucked out with her. A majority of our friends who have been married half as long as we have are already divorced or separated."

"I have to agree. Sometimes Marissa will say or do something that makes me shake my head, but in the long run, it's really nice having someone that's there." He looked at Steve, "Jack can't back on me on this because he's only been with Jules, but when you find someone and you fall in love and I mean really fall in love. The sex is mind-blowing, better than you thought it could be."

"You're starting to sound like a woman Craig," Steve grinned.

He sat back and shrugged, "You'll see. I just don't think you've ever been in love before. It'll change you, man. You'll say and do things that you never thought you would." He glanced over at Jack for clarification, "You can vouch for me on that, can't you?"

"Hell ya," he agreed, with an annoyed look, "fucking pisses me off."

"Oh yea," Steve agreed sarcastically, "that's exactly what I'm looking for. To do things I'm against, say things I don't believe and change myself for that other person, all so I can have," he raised his fingers in quotations, "mind-blowing sex. I'll tell ya what, I'll stick with the Boston girl sex," he smiled at Jack, "because that was pretty damn good."

"I knew it!" Jack slammed his fist on the table, "that pisses me off too!"

They all three laughed over that.

"Seriously though guys, you should be pretty happy with your situation." He focused mainly on Jack, "You get to come home every night to a wife and kids who are happy are to see you. I come home to an empty house, and with my job, sometimes I don't make it home at all." He shrugged as if it weren't a big deal, "it would be nice to have what you have too."

Jack considered his life for a just a fraction of a second without Jules and his boy's, suddenly Steve's life wasn't so glamorous after all. "The grass is always greener, huh."

"Exactly," Steve replied.

Jules and Marissa came back to the table and took their seats.

Steve glanced over his shoulder, "Where's Carly?"

"Ladies room," Jules answered.

Marissa toyed with her water-glass, pouting, "We got some ok music coming on, although they wouldn't let me play any Pink."

"We only had a choice of four songs," Jules reminded her, "you chose two and Carly and I each chose one." She felt like she was talking to one of her kids.

"I know, but still, the ones you chose are pretty old."

"They're not that old!" Jules defended.

Jack put his hand on Jules knee under the table, telling her to let it go. "Anything we can dance too?"

She put hers over top of his, "Yes. Carly's and mine at least," she whispered to him. At that moment one of their selections came on. Everyone at the table knew instantly it was Marissa's choice because not one person knew the rap song that bellowed out from the speakers.

"Let me guess," Craig raised his hand and then pointed at Marissa, "her choice?"

Steve wasn't paying attention to them; his eyes were on Carly and the guy at the bar that was standing next to her as she spoke to the girl behind the bar. He could see from where he was sitting that the guy was going to make a play on her. He said something and she smiled curtly at him but kept her main focus on the bartender. He said something else and Carly slowly turned her head towards him as if what he said was ridiculous. She stared at him for a second and then slightly shook her head. The guy then turned and leaned his back against the bar with his elbow on it and slid down it so he was facing her. Carly leaned back away from him.

"Ok," Steve stood up, "time to play my role as husband again."

Jack caught on to what was happening and chuckled, "If you get into trouble over there with the local, you just let me know. I'll take care of the guy for ya," he joked.

Steve pointed at him, "Thanks buddy."

Carly held her hand up, showing the guy her ring at the same time that Steve arrived. He stood on the other side of her and put an arm around her waist, leaning over so the man could see him, "Do you need some more money, sweetheart?" he said to her but kept his eyes on the guy. "How's it going?" he said to him next.

She looked over, surprised to see him and smiled, "No, I'm just getting some darts, honey."

The guy backed off sitting back down on the bar stool, "It's cool," he said to Steve as he slightly wavered in his seat, "I was just admiring your lady," he smiled lazily.

"Pretty isn't she?" he said, knowing the guy was harmless he was just drunk.

Carly gave him a look as if telling him not to encourage him.

"She's beaufull man," he slurred.

"Yep, I'm a pretty lucky guy."

"You are!" he agreed a little too loudly, "my wife," he shook his head, "not so pretty."

Carly reached over as the bartender handed her the box of darts trying not to laugh. "Ok, all set," she looked over at Steve with wide eyes, biting her bottom lip.

"Catch ya later," Steve said to him.

"You hold on to that one now," he said, taking a drink of an empty beer.

Steve ignored him, putting an arm around Carly's shoulder as they made their way back to the table, "You little heartbreaker."

"Oh my god, shut up," she giggled, but inside she was blushing over the attention she got from Steve not the drunk at the bar. She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, pulling it out. She stared at Allan's cell phone number for a couple of seconds and then ignored it, putting it back in her pocket.

Jules clapped her hands excitedly as the song came on the jukebox. "This ones ours Carly!" She tilted her head, smiling at Steve, "Do you remember the significance of this song?"

Steve listened as _Angel_ from Aerosmith began to play. "It's Aerosmith, I know that."

Carly laughed, "I told you he wouldn't remember."

"Oh shit Steve," Jack warned him, "you're in trouble now buddy!"

Jules turned to him, "Do you remember?"

He looked confidently at his wife, "Yes! This was the first song we danced to at our Senior Prom."

She smiled, giving him a kiss.

Steve defended himself, "Hey, I may not remember the song," he turned to Carly, "but I remember the dance and I remember the dress you wore." He used his hands to describe it, "It was off the shoulders, dark blue, really thin material and it was tight until just above your knees and then it kind of fanned out, and" he continued, "you wore your hair up with these little tiny flowers in the back." He pictured her the night he came and picked her up. She was beyond beautiful, stunning was more like it.

"Wow," Craig said, "I think we all know why the song was so unforgettable, he was preoccupied with the unforgettable girl."

Carly didn't know what to say. She was speechless. He described everything perfectly, she had even forgotten about the flowers in her hair, but he hadn't. She remembered everything else about that night including their kiss. She remembered fondly running up the stairs to Karen's room and flopping down on her bed face first and then rolling over with her hands over her heart, looking up at her sister and telling her, "I'm in love with Steve."

Jack stood up and took Jules' hand, "Come on let's dance."

Craig stood up next, taking Marissa's hand, "Dance with me sweetie?" She smiled, going with him.

Steve reached out, brushing Carly's hair off her shoulder, "And you thought I forgot."

She barely heard what he said; she was still reeling over the memories of that night and wondering again as she had so many times before, what would have happened to the two of them if things hadn't turned out the way they had.

He stood up, "C'mon let's salvage what's left of this song."

She walked behind him as they joined the rest on the dance floor. He turned around and without missing a beat he took her hand and an arm around her waist and stepped into her, moving her close up against his chest. She breathed in his cologne that smelled divine. His hand gently held hers and she could feel his warm breath on her neck. That was also divine. His shoulder was the perfect height so she rested her head on it. She forgot about Allan for a few minutes and just pretended that things had turned out differently. It was her little secret.

The second he took her in his arms, he regretted it. Her body moved against his in a slow rhythmic motion. She leaned her hips into him, or did he pull her in, he wasn't sure, but it felt too good. Her small hands were soft against his rough ones. When she laid her head on his shoulder, he had to restrain himself from burying his hand in the black silk that fell over him. This was a mistake he told himself, but as the song came to a close the only regret he felt was that he had to let her go.

* * *

They took the path around the lake back to the house from the bar as the sun was slowly inching its way down over the lake. They walked in pairs, Craig and Marissa led the way, holding hands, followed by Jack and Jules that were several steps behind and who clung to each other like teenagers on a date. Steve and Carly trailed behind them about the same distance away.

"So tell me about your job in San Diego?" Steve asked.

Carly shrugged as if it was a boring subject, "I help people sell their homes, and then I help them buy a new one. Really exciting," she chuckled.

"What's the most expensive house you've ever sold?"

She knew that one right away, "I helped Keith Jermain buy a house in La Jolla a couple of years ago. That was fun!"

Steve looked over surprised, "The quarterback for the Chargers, Keith Jermain?"

She nodded, "The perks were great. Free tickets to the games," she turned to him, "and I mean great seats, up in the owner's boxes. Plus he hooked me up with some other players that were new on the team and I made some good commissions."

"Nice!" Steve nudged her, "you still like football, huh?"

"Oh yea, I try to go to a game at least once a year. Season tickets are just way too much, but its fun to catch a game evey now and then."

"You should come to Hawaii and see the Pro Bowl."

She looked over at him wondering if that was an invitation or just small talk. "That would be fun. Allan likes the games too. That's one thing we do together that we really enjoy."

He smiled, forgetting for a second that she was married. The idea of her coming to Hawaii was nice, but with her husband, the idea suddenly became not so great. He was starting to become jealous of a man he'd never met. He heard Danny's voice in his ear warning him. He looked down at the ring on her finger, and for once, listened to that voice.

* * *

"No chick flicks!" Jack requested with enthusiasm as Craig sorted through a drawer of movies.

"No way!" he glanced over his shoulder at him, "how about Iron Man?"

"I'll watch that," Jules announced.

"Sounds good too me," Carly agreed.

"Robert Downey Jr.," Jules smiled, licking her lips.

Steve sat down on the couch next to Carly, "Is he one of your free passes?"

"Number three," she held up three fingers.

"Who's number one?" he asked.

"Bradley Cooper," Carly answered for her.

He looked at her next, "And what about you?"

"Bradley Cooper is quite fine, but I'm like you. I like the guy next door."

"Really, how does a guy get a house in that neighborhood?" he said it, and then realized he had crossed the line just a little too far and tried to cover his tracks, "because I could let Bradley know."

"Hey," Jules rang out, "if he's moving into anyone's neighborhood, it's going to be mine!"

Jack hugged her from behind, "That's right baby, you keep that dream alive."

Steve glanced across the room at Craig as he gave him a look, informing him he knew exactly what the comment meant. The movie started in the DVD player and Carly grabbed a pillow and laid it back against Steve's body as he sat in the corner of the couch.

She went to lay back on him and stopped, looking over her shoulder at him. "Is this ok?" she asked innocently.

He smiled at her, "Sure." He kept one arm on the back of the couch and the other on the arm of it, so he wouldn't touch her. He looked back over at Craig with an uneasy expression as she laid back with her head on the pillow that was nestled against this body. His feelings for her were shifting and he wasn't the only one that noticed it.

By the time the credits rolled, Carly was sound asleep. Steve reached down to wake her as Craig turned the TV off and the others said their goodnights and started up the stairs. He gently shook her shoulder.

"Carly, wake up." He went to move when she rolled over, putting an arm around his waist. He growled and shook her again. "Carly."

Craig stood in front of him, shaking his head, "Got yourself in a little predicament there." He put his hands on his hips, "You kind of like it though, don't you?"

"Not really, my legs starting to fall asleep. Help me get her up."

"Don't bullshit me." He squatted down, "I saw the way you were looking at her this morning on the boat and then at the bar."

"Hey," he pointed toward her, motioning for him to keep his voice down. He whispered to him, "I think you're mistaking our friendship for something else. She's married and I'm well aware of that."

"I also think you're well aware that she could make you say things you never would, or do things you never would," he described the details of falling in love that they had discussed earlier in the bar.

Steve shook his head at him, "You make it sound like we've already done something wrong. Jesus Craig, don't make me feel guilty over something that doesn't exist."

A look of regret flashed over his face. He put his hand up, "I'm not. I'm sorry." He rubbed his fingers over his mouth; "It's just that after Mary left me for that other guy…" he shook his head, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I know you would never do that. And I know Carly wouldn't either. Forget what I said. I'm sorry."

Steve nodded like all was forgotten, but it wasn't the accusation that bothered him, it was the fact that he was right.


	5. Chapter 5

Craig sat down on the Jet Ski and reached out for Marissa's hand, "Careful honey."

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" she asked.

"Yes," he said for the tenth time, "You won't get wet, I promise."

She slid off her t-shirt exposing a tiny red bikini, dropping it on the deck. She put on a life vest and climbed down the ladder putting one foot on as it rocked back and forth. "Oh my god!"

"It's ok," he laughed, "just sit down and hold on to me."

She let go of the ladder and quickly took a seat behind him and wrapped her arms around his body. "Don't go fast," she begged.

"We have to go a little fast, but I'll be good."

He started the engine and pushed away from the dock, flooring it.

The four standing in the grass laughed as Marissa let out a scream as they shot out of the small bay that was in front of Craig's house, racing toward the open water.

"You guys going?" Steve asked Jack and Jules.

"No, you go first," Jules said, "I have to put the ribs on for dinner. We'll go after you."

Steve looked at Carly, "You ready?"

"I want to drive."

"What?! No way!" he said as they made their way down to the dock, "I'm driving."

Carly ran past him to the end of the dock and scooped up the life vest that had the key to the Jet Ski attached to it. "I'm driving," she declared as she slipped it on.

He sighed heavily putting his hands on his hips, "Have you ever been on one of these before?"

She gave him an annoyed look for even asking that. "I live by water too. Of course I have."

She climbed down the ladder first, sitting down and slipping the key in that was attached to the life vest by a long cord. She looked up as he came down and carefully stepped on it and then sat behind her. Unlike Marissa he gripped the handles that were on each side of the seat instead of her.

She started the engine and glanced over her shoulder, "Are you ready?"

"If I go in," he warned, "you're going with me."

Carly laughed and pushed away from the dock, "We'll see."

She gunned the engine as they took off. She got about a hundred yards out in the water and turned it sharply, whipping the back end and then floored it at the same time. She felt the weight of the Jet Ski suddenly become lighter and looked over her shoulder laughing as he bobbed in the water about ten feet away. They both looked toward the house as Jack whistled from the front yard, and then clapped his hands over his head.

"Hmm," Carly said looking down at herself, "I don't feel wet."

He swam over and pulled himself up from the back, taking his seat behind her. He wrapped his arms around her, getting her wet as she squealed and laughed.

"Try it again smart ass," he laughed, holding her around the waist this time.

She gunned it as they went out to the open water. She did a couple more turns and tried to throw him off but he was holding on too tight and she knew she'd go with him. They were having a blast though. The water was still calm before the afternoon boaters made their way out. It was also a Thursday and Craig had told them to enjoy it now because once the weekend hit, it was Jet Ski and boaters central.

She stopped in the middle of the lake and looked over her shoulder at him, "Do you want to drive now?"

"Sure." He stood up and they carefully switched places, but not before he playfully grabbed her arm and pretended to throw her in and then pull her back.

"Don't!" she screamed and laughed at the same time.

"Nah, I'm saving it. You're going to fly through the air like a Frisbee sweetheart."

She giggled nervously and sat down behind him, quickly wrapping her arms around his waist tightly. "I'm scared!" she laughed, laying her head on his back.

"You should be." He gunned it as the front end stuck up in the air and then became level as they shot across the water. He could feel her grip around his waist tighten as she screamed every time they got airborne from jumping their own wakes. He waited until she was comfortable and then did the same thing she did and whipped it to the left. She did exactly as he had said and flew off the back, her arms and legs going in last as she landed on her back in the water. He came back around to pick her up, circling her in the water.

"You were like a missile!" he laughed.

She smiled brightly and motioned for him to pick her up. "Get over here!"

She climbed up from the back the same as him, taking her seat, "Ok, we're even now."

He looked back at her, "Do you want to just go for a cruise?"

"Yes," she put her arms back around his waist as he took off.

They saw Craig and Marissa coming straight at them and slowed down.

"Hi," Carly reached out taking Marissa's hand, pulling them together. "Having fun?"

"He goes too fast!" Marissa complained.

"We never went over 20 mph," Craig argued. "Look at Carly, she's soaked. Have some fun."

Marissa leaned back crossing her arms. "I don't want to have to do my hair and makeup all over again."

"Then don't!" he practically yelled, "who cares!"

Carly squeezed Steve, giving him a hint to get them out of there.

"How far does the lake go around," he asked Craig.

He pointed toward the right; "Over that way is the main dock and boat ramp, and gas if you need it. I have an account with them." He pointed in the other direction, "Over that way it curves around and there are some cool little inlets to explore. We got about halfway there when someone got cold." He glanced over his shoulder at her.

"Take me back now. Please!" she said sarcastically.

"We'll see you in a bit," Steve said.

Carly pushed off of them as they both started their engines and took off in opposite directions.

"Go that way," Carly said, pointing toward the inlets side of the lake.

He turned to where she was pointing and gunned it. He could hear her laughing and feel her grip tighten. She rested her chin on his shoulder as they skidded across the lake that was as smooth as glass. The lake narrowed from about a mile across to about half that. The forest got thicker on one side as the sheared off hillside from the mountain got higher on the other. The further they went in the closer the two shorelines became. He slowed down, not knowing how shallow it was. He could tell it was a man-made lake and probably wasn't as deep as a natural one.

Carly pointed toward an inlet by the cliffs at a waterfall that was coming from a whole in the middle of the hundred-foot cliff. It was about twenty feet across and was flowing pretty rapidly.

"Let's go over there."

He got as close as he could and then shut down the engine, gliding in. Carly jumped off the side into the knee-deep water and pulled it over to the shore as he climbed off the other side, helping her. He pulled it up on the grassy edge so it was out of the water enough that it couldn't go anywhere. He turned around and Carly was already headed toward the waterfall. She had on the same pair of cut off jeans from the previous day and a black bikini top. She adjusted her long black hair into a new ponytail as she walked.

He caught up with her as she stood at the edge of pool that it spilled into.

"This is so cool," she said, taking a step in as the water splashed about ten feet in front of them. She wiggled her toes in the tiny pebbles that had become smooth from the constant motion from the waterfall.

Steve stared at the waterfall for a minute and then made his way around the side, pulling himself up between two rocks and climbed along the side of it, over boulders and using trees as leverage until he was about twenty feet up.

"Be careful," Carly yelled to him. She smiled at his adventurous side. She got her first glimpse of him without a shirt on and appreciated the view. He was defined and strong but it was the scars on his body that made her wonder if those were from training or real life threatening events. He smiled down at her just then from above. 'He looks like Tarzan up there,' she thought, giggling to herself.

"Come here!" he said eagerly.

She watched him step over a boulder into the side of the waterfall.

"Steve," she yelled, "don't do that!"

He popped back out. "Come here!" he said again, making his way back over to the path he took up. "You have to see this!"

She went over and followed his wet path as he appeared above her with his hand held down. She reached hers up and he pulled her easily up to where he was.

"Just follow my path," he said.

She did just that and once they were where he had been before, he moved out of the way so she could see what he had been so enthusiastic over.

"Oh my god!" She turned back to him bright eyed, "can we go in there?"

"Let me go first and see."

She laid flat against the rock wall as he carefully moved in front of her. At one point they were face to face only inches apart.

"Hi," he smiled, their noses almost touching, "How's it going?"

She rolled her eyes, grinning at him as he moved on; carefully letting out the breath she'd been holding. "God Lord,' she thought, 'could he get any sexier.'

He leaned back behind the water as it poured over the edge leaving about a three-foot gap between the rocks and the cascading falls. He glanced inside the opening that was relatively flat. He held on to a tree branch that hung over and put his foot in to see if it was slippery at all. He felt pretty confident and stepped in, making his way back in just to be sure Carly would be safe.

She watched him disappear behind the water and leaned forward, looking over the edge. She felt pretty safe deciding that even if she fell, she probably wouldn't get hurt. The pool below looked about ten feet deep.

He appeared again, reaching his hand out, "Come on. Be careful and use that branch to get over that rock right there. It's not slippery, but just go slow."

She grabbed his hand and reached up taking the branch as he guided her in behind the water. She turned her face away as it splashed her. She looked down at her feet, following his side steps until he stopped, letting go of her hand.

He stepped back away holding his arms out as she raised her head. "What do you think?" he yelled over the pounding of the water that was just at the tip of his out stretched arm.

Her eyes lit up as big as her smile. She held on to the rock wall as she glided her hand through the waterfall. "This is amazing!" she yelled.

He loved her enthusiasm and turned making his way deeper in. "It gets a little wider over here."

She bent over going under a branch that was sticking out, following him. The ground was wet but not slick at all. She came up behind him, putting a hand on his back as he bent over the low hanging boulders. He sat down and pushed away some rocks and debris next to him, clearing a seat for her.

She squatted down looking around the area for any bugs or foreign creatures that might crawl on her, feeling confident she took the spot next to him, pulling her knees up to her chest. "How did you know about this? Is it something you were taught to look for when you were a Seal?"

"No!" he said as if surprised she didn't know. "It's from that movie."

She leaned back looking at him confused. "Movie?"

"Last of the Mohicans. When they hid behind that waterfall."

She busted up laughing, leaning against him. She loved that he could just admit it was something so simple as that, and not embellish it to make himself look impressive. To her that was more thrilling than if he told her it was from the training. "I love that movie!"

"I look behind every waterfall I see, just incase." He nudged her, "You must be good luck because this is the first one I've found."

She liked that. "If the Indians came and took me away, would you find me?" she joked, replaying a scene from the movie.

"I would" he said adamantly, reciting another scene, "I'd give myself up just to save you."

"Then you'd build me a log cabin and we'd live happily ever after."

He looked over at her, "That's not from the movie."

"No, but that's what every girl who watches it thinks happens in the end."

He nodded, "Ok then, I'll build you a log cabin."

She laid her head on her knees looking at him, "Can I ask you something? But you don't have to answer if you don't want too. It's ok."

He was intrigued, "What?"

She pointed at a couple of significant scars on his chest and shoulder. "How did you get those?"

He looked down at where she was pointing. He would normally feel uncomfortable talking about it, but with Carly it was easy. He described each one as if he was proud of them, beginning with the most insignificant ones first. She smiled at the story where he had just slipped, getting on a bus and sliced his arm on the door. He then began to describe the knife wound he got on a tour in Afghanistan, not going into too much detail and leaving out the ending, but she knew he must have killed whoever it was because he was still alive. He described two more before leaning forward and showing her one on his back shoulder.

"This was probably the scariest one I ever got."

She studied the scar that was about an inch long, but not as threatening as the others. She could have had one just like that. She wanted to reach up and touch it, knowing that if the others were life threatening and this one was the scariest, that the moment must have been terrifying for him. She didn't ask nor did she touch it, it would have been too personal. But when he began to explain to her, she felt privileged that he trusted her enough with it.

"We got caught in a fire fight and I was pinned down against a truck that had just been blown apart. There were about four snipers firing on me from different angles. I had my back pressed against a piece of metal sticking out, but I had nowhere to go. If I leaned forward just an inch, they'd get me. I really didn't feel it cutting me; I was too preoccupied with the bullets that were whistling past my face hitting the ground, the truck, just about everywhere except me. Either they were really bad shots, or someone decided it wasn't my time yet," he halfheartedly laughed; still amazed he lived through that. "It's crazy some of the stuff that goes through your mind."

Carly stared at him in complete awe, "Like what?"

"The first thing of course is your training. Find a way out. But after about thirty seconds of that I realized there wasn't one and I also knew that they would be shifting positions soon to get a clean shot. It was a no win situation." He picked up a rock off the ground and mindlessly played with it in his hand as he talked, "I thought about my Mom first and it was like this calm came over me. It started from the top and just moved through me. It was odd. Then of course my Dad, my sister, friends. All of this was happening, like that," he snapped his fingers as if imitating time, "split second images." He tossed the rock into the waterfall and glanced over at her. "I thought about Karen, and you."

She felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up, "You did?" she asked almost in a whisper.

He only nodded; not telling her that what he felt for both of them was regret. He regretted letting Karen go, and he regretted letting Carly walk out of his life. It was after that incident that he had tried to contact her and found out she had just been married. That hurt almost as much as when he first lost her, because it was one of the things he had promised himself in that spilt moment. He wanted to see where it would take them, but he was too late.

He was quiet after that confession so she just let it go, assuming it was all about Karen's death, and they had closed that the first night sitting on the deck and she didn't want to open up those wounds again. "How did you get out of it?"

"I was sitting there and decided that I was just going to make a break for it instead of waiting to die. I figured I had nothing to lose." He smiled, "All of a sudden there was this huge explosion and smoke and debris came flying at me. The next thing I knew I was being hauled off the ground and thrown in the back of a Humvee. My team blasted the shit out of the building with a couple of rocket launchers and then pulled up in the middle of the chaos and got me out."

"Oh my God," Carly sighed with her hand over her heart. "What if you would have made a run for it just a couple of seconds before that?"

"I know," Steve said shrugging. "There were so many reason I shouldn't have lived through that, but I did."

"I'm so glad you did too. It would have broken my heart." She looked up at him, "Thank you for telling me that. I know you probably don't like to talk about it."

Her eyes expressed the same sincerity as her voice. He felt like kicking himself for letting her get away. She was the one and only woman he had ever met that he knew he could live happily with, and he also knew he would have done anything to make her happy. He had let himself believe all this time that he just didn't want to settle down with anyone, but after being with her again, it was obvious too him now, the only flaws the other women had, is that they simply weren't Carly.

He looked so sad. She wondered if maybe there was more to the story than he was telling her. Or maybe she shouldn't have pushed him. She could only imagine how difficult some of those times must have been on him, being in battle and facing death. "I'm sorry Steve, I probably shouldn't have asked you about those scars."

He just stared at her, seeing his life pass before his eyes again, only this time, it was the life he wished he would have had. "Why didn't you ever try to contact me, Carly?"

That question was so unexpected and asked in such a way that she knew the sadness in his eyes wasn't about the scars. She would have given anything at that second to be able to go back in time. Her throat tightened and she shook her head. "I don't know." She had asked herself that same question a thousand times. "I thought about you. I even prayed for you to be safe, but I just couldn't. I missed Karen so much. Those were very difficult times for me." She thought he of all people should understand, "You never tried to contact me either."

"Yes I did."

She stared at him confused, "When?"

"Right after you got married."

She looked even more confused, "But I never heard from you. Why didn't you follow through with it?"

He hesitated; remembering how disappointed he was when he found out she was married. He just didn't have the heart to see her after that knowing she was unattainable, and that was the only reason he didn't pursue it, but he never stopped thinking about her. He wasn't sure he wanted to divulge that piece of fragile information to her, but he also didn't want to lie her. Too him, lying was a deal breaker in any relationship. He just said it before he had a chance to dissect how she would react to it. "You were already married."

She went to reprimand him for not following through when it suddenly hit her. It all became crystal clear. It wasn't the friendship he had been seeking out to renew; he had wanted to renew the relationship they last shared together.

She wanted to cry, not knowing just how badly she wanted that with him too, until now. She had convinced herself that it would hurt too much being with him. Trying to overcome Karen's death had been so hard she was afraid seeing him would only make it worse. But the moment she saw him standing on that porch two days earlier, and now getting to know him all over again, she knew she had made a huge mistake.

He was sitting there so close, his confession still floating around her, not knowing why he felt the need to tell her that, unless he still wanted it, even now after all this time. The attraction to him was clear, there was no doubt in her mind, but so was her marriage to Allan. She wanted to stop herself from making another mistake.

"Why are you telling me this? Why now?" She stood up, holding on to the rocks trying too quickly to make her way out.

He got up following her. "Go slow!"

She ignored him, slipping once but was out of his reach by then. Her knee clipped the end of a rock as she fell, hitting it hard. She grabbed the tree branch and caught herself before she fell all the way.

"Carly!" he yelled at her as she went out where they had come in.

She felt his arm go around her waist as they stood on the ledge just outside the entrance. He held her firmly.

"Stop," he said angrily, "before you get hurt again." He moved around in front of her. "Let me look at that." He squatted down lifting her knee as she braced her hand against the rocks.

She looked down at the scar on his shoulder, feeling a shiver run down her spine. It made her angry that she still cared so much for him but there was nothing she could do about it.

He wiped away the debris from the wound carefully so as not to hurt her. "We'll put something on it when we get back."

"What do you think I'm just going to walk out of my marriage for you?!" she blurted out, saying it more to herself than to him.

He looked up at her irritated, "No! Of course not!" He let go of her knee and stood up, "You asked me a question and I answered it. Did you want me to lie?"

He really hadn't done anything wrong. She felt bad for accusing him in that way, especially since everything he had said pleased her. She shook her head, "No, I don't like lying." She had had her fill of it in the last seven years. She looked up at him uneasily, "I'm sorry." He stood so close she could feel the warmth of his body. It startled her that if he would have said 'yes' to her question, she might have done it.

A smile slowly emerged on his face, "Contrary to what you might think, if you came to my house, I don't have a shrine set up with your pictures and a candle light vigil by my bed."

She tried to stop the smile that was forcing its way on to her lips. She rolled her eyes at him and turned her head, feeling embarrassed.

"Kind of full of yourself, aren't ya?" He teased moving past her and climbing back down again.

"What?!" she snapped, following his path down from the rocks. "I am not!"

He looked over his shoulder at her, grinning.

"How did you find out anyway that I was married? No one told me that you asked."

"I worked for Navy Intelligence. It wasn't that difficult." He turned around and waited, making sure she got down safely.

"Oh," she said snotty, "look at you, Mr. Navy Intelligence. Who's acting all arrogant now?" she snickered walking past him toward the Jet Ski.

"Whatever, Diva" he chuckled, "and I'm driving back."

She looked over her shoulder, giving him a look and then made a run for the life vest that had the key. "First one there!" she yelled out.

"Damn it, Carly. I called it!" he declared, chasing after her.

She snatched it up off the ground and quickly put it on. "Beat you again," she sang out as he stopped right in front of her, "just like I'm going to do when we have that swim race too."

"Swim race," he huffed, "You're too chicken to race me." He scooped up the other jacket, slipping it on as he walked over to the Jet Ski.

"I am not," she argued, following behind him.

They lifted the machine together, putting it back in the water. She climbed on first, putting the key in. He walked them out to deeper water.

"Then let's race when we get back," he challenged, jumping on the back with her.

She started the engine and steered away from the land. "My knee is sore. That will slow me down."

Steve laughed, "It didn't slow you down running for the key."

"I know," she whined, "but it kind of hurts now." She smiled over her shoulder at him, "I'm not as tough as you are. It hurts when I fall."

He put his arms around her waist as she gunned it out of the inlet. Her last words weren't true at all. He felt it, because he had fallen, fallen in love with her all over again. He had his arms around her and if she could have seen his face and read his mind she would have seen the pain. He had managed to get himself out of the situation with her by pretending to turn it around and make it seem less than what it was, but in actuality a part of him wanted her to walk out of her marriage for him, no matter how many people it might have hurt. He wanted her that badly.

As they skimmed across the water he held her just a bit closer, pretending to her again it was for his own security because of the speed, but it was for his own satisfaction, knowing this was probably the closest he would ever get to her, taking full advantage while he could.

Carly's heart was racing faster than the boat. She wanted to get back to the house and escape somewhere alone. She needed to cry, fighting it every second. His arms around her felt strong and safe, but more than anything else, it felt good, too good.

She saw the house in the distance and began to slow down as they approached the cove. There were five people standing in the grass. Carly could see Jules waving at them as they approached, and then she saw him.

Steve looked over her shoulder at the same view, narrowing his eyes at the fifth person standing next to Craig. "Who is that?"

Carly felt her heart sink to her stomach. The timing was horrible.

"That's Allan," she sighed, not expressing the excitement she should have. She felt his hands separate from around her waist and slide across her belly until he wasn't touching her anymore, but simultaneously she swore she felt him lean closer into her.

He gripped the handles on the side of the seat just a little too tightly, staring at the man on the lawn that possessed the one thing he wanted more than anything else. He didn't think he had ever felt so heart broken in his entire life.


	6. Chapter 6

Carly pulled the Jet Ski up to the dock as Steve reached out grabbing the ladder, pulling them in the rest of the way. They were hidden from view as she turned and looked back at him.

He motioned with his head, "You go ahead. I'll tie it down."

She got about halfway up and hesitated for just a second, looking back down at him. He stared up at her, making her heart jump the same way it should have when she first saw Allen.

He looked away first, "Make sure you put something on that knee," he reminded her. His concern for her was sweet, but it was the dismayed sound in his voice that had her attention. Gone was the smile that she could hear even when she wasn't looking at him. She turned back to go up the rest of the way when she saw Jack reaching down for her hand.

She stood on the dock undoing her life jacket when he whispered to her, "Where have you been?"

"Is he mad?" Carly asked trying to get the snaps undone.

"He doesn't act like it but he's on his second beer already and the tension was getting pretty thick."

"Sorry." She slid the jacket off and went running down the dock toward him.

Steve took his time tying the Jet Ski down, not necessarily wanting to see the reunion between them. He reached for the ladder and saw Jack looking over at him.

"Hey," he smiled up at him, putting on the best show he could as he climbed up. "You should see this place Carly and I found." He stood on the dock next to him, slipping the shirt over his head he had left there. "Craig pointed out some places around the other side of the lake. I'll take you and Jules over tomorrow. It's pretty cool."

"Nice!"

"So that's Allan?" He looked beyond him, seeing the two of them together. They stood side by side but weren't touching.

"Yea, he's already on his second beer but I have a feeling he had a couple before he even got here."

Steve followed him down the dock, getting a better look at him. He was slightly taller than Craig, which made him a couple of inches shorter than Steve. He had a slender build with dark, wavy hair that he ran his hand through two times in the last ten seconds. Steve wondered if that was a regular habit or a nervous habit. As they approached he made eye contact with Carly and she touched Allan's arm, leading him over to he and Jack.

"Allan," she began, "this is Steve, and Steve this is my husband Allan."

Steve reached his hand out, smiling at him, "Hi Allan. It's good to meet you." He wasn't a bad-looking guy, Steve thought, but the look on his face as she introduced them wasn't the friendliest either.

Allan's enthusiasm wasn't the same as his. He smiled curtly, taking his hand, "Hey, nice to meet you." He barely made eye contact with him before looking back at Carly. "Did you enjoy the ride?"

She wasn't sure if he was being sarcastic or not, "It was fun. You should go change and we'll take it out."

"Maybe later. Which room is yours so I can dump my stuff?"

She pointed over her shoulder, "Come on, I'll show you." They turned and started up the yard.

"Dinner will be ready in about half an hour," Jules said as they passed each other.

"Ok, thanks." Carly smiled. Allan didn't reply but stopped at the ice chest before going in, polishing off his beer and reaching inside for a fresh one.

She glanced over her shoulder at Steve and the others, hoping things wouldn't change now that he had arrived. They had all been having so much fun together. She didn't want that to end. She watched him take a long drink of his new beer, also hoping that he wouldn't do too much of that either.

Steve watched them go inside and turned to Jules. "Friendly guy," he said blowing out a breath.

She shrugged with an 'I told you so,' look.

"He's not mad because we were on the Jet Ski is he?"

"Who knows," Jack replied.

"He likes to pout," Jules commented.

"Seriously?" Steve laughed, amazed that a grown man would act like that. He also didn't like the uneasy expression on Carly's face before they went inside. She already looked a little stressed and he hadn't even been there for five minutes.

* * *

Carly moved some clothes off the bed as Allan swung his suitcase up on it.

"How was San Francisco?" she asked, sitting down on the other side.

"It was work." He unzipped his bag, looking at her. "How was your Jet Ski ride?"

"I already told you, it was fun."

He gave her a look that she recognized as more of a glare. "So that's the Seal dude?"

"His name is Steve and yes."

"Defending him already, that's sweet."

"Allan," she snapped, "just stop, alright. These are all very old and very dear friends of mine."

"I know, you've told me that about a thousand times. I've heard all about them except for Steve. How come you've never mention him?"

"Because this is the first time I've seen him since high school."

He took a drink of his beer, "I'm surprised you wanted to see him. Isn't he the one that let your sister drown?"

She stood up, "No, he's not!" she snapped, "He's the one that tried to save her." She walked around the side of the bed, "Don't you dare bring that up. Do you hear me?"

He held his hands up in defense laughing, "All right, calm down. I was just joking."

"It wasn't funny."

He gave her a pouty look, "I'm sorry then." He set his beer on the nightstand and put his arms around her. "Come on, don't be mad."

She hesitantly put her arms around him too. "I just want to have a nice time. You will too. I promise."

"If you say so."

She pulled back away from him, sensing that cocky attitude that was going to embarrass her. "Please Allan."

He raised his arms up, "Ok, Jesus. I'll try to be perfect like your Navy man."

She didn't respond to that with an answer and just stared at him before she turned and walked out.

She found Jules in the kitchen taking the ribs out of the oven. "Hi. Do you need any help?"

"Yes please! Jack was supposed too, but he, Steve and Craig found a beer and the lounge chairs. Lazy butts."

Carly patted her back, "It's all good. We'll make a nice big mess and they can clean up."

Jules smiled brightly at her. "I like your style."

Half an hour later Carly leaned out the back door at the three of them laughing, still sitting on the lounge chairs. "Dinners ready boys." She stepped out and looked around, "Where's Allan?"

Jack walked by her, "I don't know, we haven't seen him since he got here."

Steve sat on the edge of his chair, seeing that look in her eyes that had appeared twice now since Allan had arrived but had never surfaced over the last three days. He wasn't sure if it was disappointment, irritation or both. But it wasn't happy. "Do you want me to go find him and tell him dinners ready?" he asked.

When she looked at him the smile returned, "No, I'll find him. He probably just laid down for a while." That was her excuse, but she knew he had probably passed out on the bed and second, she wanted to keep the two of them apart if possible.

He stood up and walked over toward her, stopping before he went inside. "Are you ok?"

He could see it on her; she knew it because she could see the genuine concern in his eyes. Why did he have to look at her like that? She walked past him, "I'm fine," she replied just a little too enthusiastic.

He knew better. He could already see changes in her, and not for the better. He was beginning to believe Jules description of Allan. So far what he'd seen wasn't impressive.

Carly went upstairs to their room and just as she had expected he was lying on the bed, sleeping. His phone buzzed on the nightstand and she glanced down at the text message from a phone number she didn't recognize, all the message said was, 'LAX flight 3459, Tues 10:35am.' She didn't think anything of it, assuming it was a client or a flight for him from his company. She reached down and nudged him, "Allan," when he didn't move she nudged him even more, "Allan! Wake up."

He opened his eyes and reached up grabbing her by the arm and pulling her down on top of him.

"Allan!" she protested, "Dinners ready."

He rolled over so he was on top of her, "Didn't you miss me?" His hand cupped her breast over her shirt as he kissed her neck.

"Aren't you hungry?" she asked, hoping it would encourage him to stop.

"I'm starving," he replied in a husky voice. He sat up removing his shirt over his head.

"Allan, they're waiting for us to eat." She protested again.

He jumped off the bed and went to the door, yelling out, "Hey you guys, go ahead and start without us. We'll be down in a few minutes." He closed the door, locking it.

She came off the bed and met him halfway, "What are you doing?"

He stood in front of her, staring at her, "What are you doing?" his eyes narrowed, "In a hurry to get back downstairs?"

She knew exactly what he was saying he didn't have to clarify it. "No, it's just that everyone will know what we are doing up here."

"Who cares," he moved her back toward the bed, "We're married, we're allowed."

"I know," she laughed nervously, "but…"

"But what?" he said coldly, "Is there someone down there that might object?"

She tilted her head, "No! Of course not." But there was and for reasons she couldn't explain to herself she didn't want to flaunt it in front of him.

"Good," he laid her back on the bed, undoing his pants before crawling up on her.

They all heard Allan as they took their seats at the table.

Marissa chuckled, "Looks like someone's getting some afternoon delight."

Steve smiled through gritted teeth, trying his best to pretend like it wasn't bothering him, but inside he felt his heart sink to his stomach. She was up there right now with him. He had his hands on her, his mouth. He squeezed the beer bottle in his hand at the thought of him on top of her. It made him sick to his stomach. Five minutes earlier he had been starving, now he looked at the steaming BBQ ribs and side dishes on the table that were some of his favorites, but he had no appetite.

Allan rolled off her on to his back, panting. He looked over as she scooted off the bed and headed for the bathroom. "Now I'm hungry!" he laughed.

She closed the door behind her, leaning back against it with her head hung. She put her hand over her mouth, trying to muffle the sound of her tears that overcame her. She had never realized just how bad their lovemaking had become until now. She felt like a whore that he just mounted, pleased himself on and then rolled off of. He never acknowledged her anymore. It had just been the two of them but she was humiliated anyway. It made her feel unwanted and worse yet, undesirable. He never looked at her anymore they way that Jack looked at Jules, or that Craig looked at Marissa. She paused, recalling her afternoon with Steve and thought sadly, 'or the way he looks at me.'

She jumped as he knocked on the door, pulling her away from her memory of the waterfall.

"I'm going down to eat."

"Ok," she said and then sighed, walking over and turning the shower on.

Allan sauntered into the kitchen across from the dinning room. He went to the fridge pulling out a beer and then made his way to the table. He took a seat across from Steve. "This smells good." He grabbed a couple of ribs off the platter and picked up one of the side dishes.

"Dig in," Craig said, passing him a couple more bowls of salad. "How was the drive down?"

"Long. I was up early and on the road by seven." He looked over at him, "Sorry I vanished when I got here. I had to crash for a while."

Jules looked toward the stairs, "Where's Carly."

Allan smiled at her and then glanced over at Steve, "Taking a shower. She'll be down in a couple of minutes."

Steve wanted to reach over and punch the smug look off his face. He felt like Allan was toying with him, or was it just his imagination, why would he. He really had no reason to dislike him, and vise versa, except for the fact that he was married to Carly.

"How was the convention in Sacramento?" Jack asked.

"The what?" Allan looked confused and then quickly recovered, "Oh yea. Actually it was just some doctors I went and met at a hospital." He took a bite of his rib, wiping his mouth off with a napkin, "I had them hooked in ten minutes. Sold them the entire line of a new painkiller that was just approved by the FDA. Actually I think it was the female doctor that I lured in first. Damn, she was something. Beauty, brains and what a body! I got her to commit to a years worth." He looked across at Steve again, "I made some serious bank on that deal. It was worth the trip."

'_Ok_,' Steve thought to himself, "_this guys a prick_."

He looked past him as Carly came toward the table. She had changed into a pair of black sweat pants and a dark blue t-shirt. Her hair was still wet from the shower and she wore no visible signs of make up, yet she was still so beautiful. She took a seat next to Allan and across from Jules. Steve watched as Allan ate his dinner and never acknowledged her presence except to move his chair over as she sat down.

"You out did yourself Jules. This smells so good."

Steve reached over Allan, seeing he wasn't going to budge and picked up the plate of ribs, passing it to her.

She smiled, but didn't make eye contact with him, "Thanks." She wasn't really hungry after her encounter with Allan but didn't want to be rude to Jules. She went to set the plate back on the table and glanced up at Steve who was watching her. He turned away the second they made eye contact but not before she caught a glimpse of something in his eyes. It was a forlorn look that bordered on disappointment. She had the oddest sensation right then as if she had somehow cheated on him for being with Allan. She dismissed it, realizing that was a crazy theory.

Everyone ate their fill not leaving very many leftovers.

Steve pushed his plate away and leaned his elbows on the table, "We should get another fire going tonight," he suggested, glancing down at Craig who sat at the head of the table.

Everyone agreed, except Marissa.

"It makes my clothes and hair smell like smoke."

Craig patted her on the leg, "You don't have to come out sweetie. Stay in and watch a movie or something."

She smiled at him, "You don't mind?"

He leaned over and kissed her cheek, "Of course not. This is your vacation too."

"I think I might just do that then," she bounced happily in her seat.

Craig looked over at Steve, "We need some wood cut."

He sat back in his chair, "Ok," he looked over at Jack, "We need some wood cut."

Jack in turned looked at Jules, "We need some wood cut."

"Nice try," she laughed.

He put an arm around her, "Come on, you're tough!"

"No way," she nudged his arm away, "besides you'll be all limbered up after doing the dishes."

"Dishes?" he whined.

"Yes," Carly chimed in, pointing at each one of the men, "We cooked, and you guys are doing the dishes."

Jules stood up, "Or one of you could cut wood instead."

All three of them quickly raised their hand.

"Mine!" Steve said, pushing back away from the table.

Jack did the same, "I want it!"

They looked at each other for a second and then both men made a dash for the door; Jack knocked his chair over in the process.

Craig waved them off.

"Holy shit," Jules laughed, "They don't want to do the dishes."

Steve was out the door first, but Jack caught him on the patio, wrapping both his arms around his body from behind, trying to stop him. Steve bent over, lifting him off the ground, carrying him on his back down the steps.

They all stood up at the table, watching them through the window and laughing at the boyish display between the two men.

"Give it up!" Jack growled, trying to get his feet on the ground, but to no avail. "Jesus H Christ you're strong!" he bellowed.

Steve reached back, getting a hold of his neck and shoulder. He was just about to flip him over when Jack pulled off the one move he'd never been trained to defend himself against.

Jules cheered from inside as Steve went to his knees and then down on all fours. Jack pushed off of him and ran to the woodpile, hoisting the ax over his shoulder.

"Pussy!" he yelled back at him, standing proudly like a statue of Paul Bunyan.

Steve was in the same position; laughing so hard he couldn't get up.

Jules and the others came out on the deck.

"That's my man!" she shouted, pointing at Jack. "You looked so tough baby. How did you get him down?"

He stood up even prouder, "I tickled the son of a bitch."

The group on the deck burst out laughing.

Steve rolled over and leaned back on his hands, "That was probably the most strategic move I've ever seen," he laughed.

Jack put a piece of wood on the stump, "Dishes are waiting for ya girlfriend." He swung the ax around and cut it in half.

Allan came out standing next to Carly. He leaned over whispering in her ear, "I'd kick his ass if he talked to me like that."

She looked at him, shaking her head at his ridiculous statement. "Steve isn't threatened by someone jokingly calling him a woman. I think he grew out of that when he was twelve." She turned and walked back in the house.

Allan caught up with her, taking her by the arm, "Why is it every time I make a comment about him you're right there to defend him?"

"It's not him I'm defending," she snapped, "it's your self-righteous attitude I'm trying to point out." She pulled her arm away. "They were just joking around. Try joining in the fun instead of criticizing and you'd probably get the joke."

"Oh, I get it," he said sarcastically, "so if I told you you were acting like a bitch, that would be funny?"

She glared at him, "Ha, Ha, Ha."

* * *

Jack proudly dropped a pile of logs behind the chairs. "This should keep the midnight oil burning." He rubbed his hands together as if they were hurting.

"Got a few blisters there?" Steve teased him. He held his hands up showing his palms, "Mine are nice and smooth. It only took about ten minutes to do the dishes."

Jack reached in the ice chest, taking out a beer, "I don't like you very much," he plopped down in one of the chairs.

Steve reached across for his beer; smiling cleverly, "You want me to open that for you?"

"Fuck you," he laughed, twisting the top off.

"My, my," Jules scolded him, "your mouth is getting dirtier by the day.

"Hey," Jack proclaimed, "I'm on vacation, there's no kids, I'm eating meat with my hands, drinking beer and chopping wood. If I want to cuss like a sailor, I will." He pounded on his chest with his fist, and then simultaneously bent over coughing from it.

"Careful," Craig said, patting him on the back, "no need to beat yourself up." He sat in the chair next to Carly laughing with the rest of them.

Steve looked toward the house as Allan came out carrying a bottle of tequila from Craig's bar and a shot glass. He stood behind Carly's chair, holding it up for display.

"What do you say, we all do a shot?"

No one really agreed very enthusiastically, so he poured himself one first. He held it up in a toast, "To old friends," he looked at Steve, "and new ones." He tilted his head back, slamming the alcohol. "Whew," he shook his head, "that's smooth tequila, Craig."

"I got it in Cabo, home-brewed." He reached his hand out as Allan handed him the next shot. He took it and held it up, "To old friends." He slammed it down, giving the glass back.

"Who's next?" Allan poured another one. "Carly," he announced.

He held it down in front of her face.

"I'm good," she waved it away.

"Come on," he nudged her, "just one."

She looked over her shoulder at him, "I'll take a big drink of my beer instead." She held it up, and then drank it down almost the whole way. He rolled his eyes and took her shot.

"Jules?" he held another out to her.

She shrugged and reached over for it, "To old friends." She acknowledged each one of them.

He then poured one for Jack and then Steve and then another for himself.

"Ok, Carly's turn again." He held it down in front of her face.

"I'll take another drink of beer."

Allan shook his head, "You're not playing fair. You should join in with the group."

"Alcohol is alcohol," she defended holding her beer up.

"Not good enough sweetie." He started to argue with her when Steve jumped in.

"She doesn't like tequila."

Allan stopped and stared over at him, "Yes she does."

Steve shrugged, "She hated it in high school. Did your taste change?"

She looked over at him, and even though he was right, she didn't want to embarrass Allan in front of everyone by agreeing with him. "It's not so bad." She reached up taking the shot from him. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes before drinking it down. She could feel it sliding down her throat, hitting her stomach, leaving her a bit nauseous.

Steve watched her wondering why in the hell she would drink that, knowing from experience that she hated tequila. He was seeing another side of her that he never had before. It was almost as if she catered to Allan so as not cause waves. He wondered if she was aware of it, or if she had become so used to it she didn't even realize she did it. He remembered Jules telling him that she '_put up with Allan's shit_,' and he was beginning to see it first hand.

Allan patted Carly's cheek from behind; looking at Steve, "See I told you she likes it." The gesture resembled a dog owner rewarding his pet for good behavior.

It was the first time he had seen him touch her and the way in which he did it made him sick to his stomach. He was using her to prove his superiority over Steve. He looked from him to Jules, who in return stared at Carly as if she were embarrassed for her. Jack and Craig both looked at Allan with the same irritated expression as Steve's He wasn't sure if he was angrier at Carly for putting up with it, or at Allan for displaying it.

Allan took the seat next to Carly, drinking another shot as he sat down. "Great place you got here Craig. "

"Thank you," he replied, playing with the fire, not necessarily wanting to make small talk with him.

"Do you have homes anywhere else?"

"Yes, down in Cabo." He looked up at the group, "Hey, about some more marshmallows?"

Steve smiled over at Carly, "I just want to let you know that I'm off duty tonight, so if you're going to roast one and it goes missing, you're on your own."

Jules laughed, "You should have seen it Allen. Carly lost her marshmallow and they found it stuck to her sock about half an hour later."

The group all laughed recalling the funny scene, but no one more than Steve and Carly.

"Oh my God," Carly chuckled, "I thought I was going to be sick I was laughing so hard."

Allan looked between the two of them, feeling a wave of jealousy strike a nerve in him. He hated that she was having that much fun with another man, especially Steve. He had no reason to dislike him, but in his mind Steve was the worst kind of enemy, only because Allan couldn't compete with him on any level and that's what drove his hatred. When he began to feel that one-sided competition include his wife, his hatred took on a whole new level. He needed to bring Steve down a few notches.

"Mexico huh?" Allan objected to Craig's choice of homes, bringing the subject back, "With you're money you should buy something in Hawaii."

Craig shot him an annoyed look. He didn't like talking about his wealth and to have someone else mention it so carelessly embarrassed him. Allan didn't know it, and even if he did he wouldn't have cared, Craig thought.

Allan pointed over at Steve, "Isn't that where you live, Hawaii?"

Steve nodded, "Yep."

"How long have you lived you there?"

"I was born there, but moved back after I left the Navy."

Allan sat back in his chair, feeling relaxed by the four shots of tequila and beers. "Oh yea," he acted as if he just remembered that piece of information, "that's right. You were in the Navy. A Seal right?"

Steve nodded again, "Yep."

"How come you quit? Too much work?"

He looked over at him, "I didn't quit. I retired to become a Police Officer. I'm still in the reserves."

Craig thought about filling in the blanks, telling the little bastard that he also ran a task force for the Governor of Hawaii, but knew Steve wouldn't like that anymore than he liked it when Allen mentioned his money, so he reluctantly kept his mouth shut. They weren't the bragging type.

Carly put her hand on Allan's arm, "You know Allan; this isn't a very good subject."

He leaned back giving her a look, "Why not? It's not everyday you meet a real life Navy Seal." He focused back on Steve, "You don't mind a few questions do you?"

Steve eyed him, wondering what his beef was, but he also wasn't about to let the little prick think he was intimidated by him. "No, ask whatever you want."

Allan took a drink of his beer, "Have you ever been close to death. I mean really face it?"

"Allan," Carly tried again, remembering Steve's scar on his back.

"No," Steve held his hand up, "it's alright. Yes, Allan, I have been. It's a very surreal thing to experience. It makes you think about the things in life you most appreciate, but it also makes you regret the things in life that you gave up or lost and you regret those even more." He didn't even have to look at Carly for her to know that he was talking about her, but he did it anyway hoping to piss Allan off. He knew by the look in her eyes that she understood. He looked at back at Allan, "Any other questions?"

Craig sensed the tension building, "Jack we need some more wood on the fire if we're going to do marshmallows again."

Allan glared at him from across the fire. He needed something that would leave him unsettled. He didn't think about the magnitude of the question before he asked it. "How many people have you killed?"

"Allan!" Carly snapped.

"What the fuck, Allan!" Jack jumped in. "What's the matter with you?"

Craig added his two cents, "That's beyond personal."

Steve ignored the people coming to his defense and leaned forward in his chair, resting his elbows on his knees, staring back at him, "Have you ever been in the position where you might have to take a life Allan?"

He laughed, "A couple of times while I was stuck behind some old lady on the 405 freeway."

"That's very amusing," Steve said coldly, completely un-amused by his statement, "I didn't think so, and you know how I know that? Because if you had to take a life, then you wouldn't have the balls to ask someone that question knowing that they had been in that same position. There's nothing strategic or heroic about it, and it's certainly not something you talk about while sitting around the fire after being asked by a complete fucking moron."

"Relax!" Allan laughed it off, "It was just a joke." Mission accomplished, he thought to himself. Glad he hadn't mentioned Karen't name in there. He would have if this didn't work.

Steve stood up, "No, you're a joke."

Carly's face turned frightened, she was almost sure Allan had gone too far and didn't blame Steve if he hit him, but she still didn't want it to happen.

Jack stood up with him, putting his arm across Steve's chest as if holding him back.

Steve looked down at his arm and then over at him, chuckling, "What are you doing?" he pointed toward the house, "I'm just going in to grab a jacket."

Jack let his arm fall, "Oh Ok. Things were getting a little heated and…" he stopped there.

Steve laughed, "Thanks buddy, but believe me I've been in more tense situations than this and still managed to keep my cool." He looked down at Allan, knowing he was trying to get a rise out of him. He didn't consider him any differently than most of the dirt bags he and Danny interrogated on a regular basis, they all tried but most failed to get a rise out of him, and just like them he refused to give him the satisfaction, no matter how pissed he was at him. "You really should be careful Allan," he warned, "some people might take a strong offense to your boldness and not be so understanding." He looked over at Craig, "You want me to get the marshmallows while I'm in there?"

Craig sat on the edge of his chair, still anticipating a fight and not sure how Steve had managed to keep his cool, "Ah, yeah sure, they're on the fridge."

Steve ignored the rest of the group, trying to make light of the situation that Allan had created, he also couldn't help but laugh to himself at Jack's willingness to try to hold him back, because if he wanted to go after Allan, Jack's arm wasn't going to stop him. He was pissed, but it was the alarming look on Carly's face that actually calmed him. As he walked by her chair, he reached down and gently squeezed her shoulder, letting her know all was good, hoping to ease some of that tension in her, he didn't want her to ever be afraid in his presence.

She felt his hand on her shoulder. The instant he touched her she felt relieved, calmed. He had that ability with just a touch. She turned to Allan and ignored the bitter look on his face from Steve putting his hand her. She didn't think she had ever been so angry with him. "You're unbelievable," she said through gritted teeth, rising out of her chair, following Steve into the house.

Allan sat fuming, not taking into consideration his own actions that started the incident, but only focusing on the vision of Steve's hand on Carly's shoulder. He knew his marriage was already balancing on a very thin line, but he refused to take blame for not wanting kids or even the infidelity that he played with on a regular basis. Carly never knew any of these things so he didn't consider it apart of their problem. He never flaunted the affairs in her face and kept it very hidden, but here she was openly playing that part with Steve.

Carly came in the house seeing him go upstairs. She went up after him, going into his room. She stood at the door as he filtered through a couple of dresser drawers, slamming the last one a little too hard.

"I'm sorry about that down there," she apologized, stepping inside.

He dropped his head down as he leaned on the dresser with both hands. She heard a small chuckle come from him as he shook his head. "Jesus Carly," he looked over at her, "Do you do that a lot?" he asked irritably.

Her confused expression told him she didn't know what he meant.

He pushed off the dresser angrily, walking toward her, "You're sorry? You're sorry?!" he repeated a little more intensely. He stood right in front her, "Do you apologize for him a lot?" He bent his head down trying to see her face that she had turned away, "Huh! I bet you do. I bet it's a bad habit that you don't even recognize as one."  
She stared at the floor, her vision becoming blurred through the tears that welled in her eyes. It was hard hearing it come from him. "I just…" she started and then had to catch her breath, "I just wanted to make sure you were ok." Her voice broke on the last few words. She went to go out the door and he stepped in front her.

She refused to look up at him. He felt bad for saying those things to her, but he was also angry at her for letting herself get trapped into a marriage with that type of person. It was beneath her, that's what angered him the most.

She reached up to dab the tears before they fell when she felt him move in until her head was on his shoulder. "I'm sorry," he expressed remorse, "You aren't the one I wanted to make cry." His arm went around her waist as she rested against him.

She couldn't bring herself to pull away, wanting to just curl up in his arms and feel it all over. Next to her Father, he was the only man who ever loved her for being just Carly. He didn't even have to say it for her to know it. This place she was in, this shoulder that she leaned on, it gave her love without wanting anything in return. That's what she loved most about him.


	7. Chapter 7

The gathering around the fire broke up early after Allan's stunt. Jules and Jack went to bed. Craig finished the movie with Marissa and then they too retired early. Carly sat in her room on a chair staring at Allan's as he slept on the bed, trying to remember one good time in the last six years that she could really use to build on and say her marriage wasn't over, that it was worth fighting for, but nothing came to mind. He had stumbled in and laid down barely acknowledging her. He had tried to start a fight about Steve but was too drunk. She let the moment run its course knowing he would be asleep in a matter of minutes. She began to feel trapped in the room, even though he was passed out. It wasn't a physical threat but she felt an emotional one that she just wanted to escape from.

Steve sat on the edge of his bed phone in hand. He stared down at Danny's number, needing that bit of normalcy and reality that was eluding him. He was getting too close to Carly and things were getting out of control in his head. He needed someone to real him back in. He pushed send.

Danny muted the TV, "Hey, it's after one there and you're still up? This isn't a drunk call telling me how much you miss me is it?"

Steve smiled, already feeling the tension ease, "You wish."

"So how's it going?"

Steve sighed heavily into the phone. "It's going."

He sensed it immediately in his voice and clicked the TV off, "Ok, I think I know why you called."

"Yea, why's that?"

"One, you really miss me. Two, you're bored to death and had nothing else to do. Or three, it's about the girl. I'm guessing three."

Steve was silent, resting his head in his hand.

Danny scooted to the end of his chair, "If you called then you must have something to say." He could hear him on the other end and just waited patiently. He knew Steve hated being pushed. It was one o'clock in the morning; he called for a reason.

"I like being around her too much," he finally admitted.

Danny nodded, knowing very well that's what it was. "Then don't be."

"I can't help it."

"Then come home early."

"I can't."

"Yes you can, just change your flight."

"No Danny, you don't get it. I can't. I don't want to leave her again."

"Well then, you have a problem. She hasn't got a divorce since I talked to you two days ago has she?"

Steve sensed the warning in his voice. "No, but her husband's an asshole! You'd hate him more than I do. "He stood up and walked over to the window, looking down on the yard and boat dock.

"Is that the excuse you're giving yourself?"

"I'm not making excuses," he snapped, "I'm just trying to paint you a picture of what's happening."

"I don't need a picture to know that this bothers you only because she's married. Did you call me hoping I'd give you the green light to ease your conscience?"

"My conscience is clear, nothing's happened between us."

Danny laughed, "Yes it has, maybe not physically, but it's happened, otherwise you wouldn't be calling me."

He caught a glimpse of movement on the deck, seeing Carly make her way across the yard to the boat dock. He didn't hear Danny's voice any longer; he was too focused on the angel in the long T-shirt and jacket that appeared from nowhere. She stood on the end of the dock, staring out at the dark water and then climbed on the pontoon boat. He couldn't see her anymore. "I got to go."

"Don't do anything you're going to regret." Danny offered that quick piece of advice before he was cut-off.

Steve heard that loud and clear. "I won't."

"Ah huh, right," he huffed, "You say that now."

Steve walked toward the bedroom door; "I'll talk to you later." He hung up before Danny could get another word in, setting his phone on the dresser.

He made his way quietly out of the house and down the dock. As he got closer he could see her leaning against the ladder that led to the upper deck of the boat.

His first concern was that Allan might have hurt her, either physically or emotionally, they were both going to be upsetting too him. But if he had physically hurt her, '_if she has a mark on her_,' he thought rabidly, he'd rip his head off.

The wood dock gave away his presence and she turned around, still holding on to the ladder with one had. She smiled slightly at him as he stepped down into the boat. "Are you ok?" he asked keeping a relatively good distance from her.

She nodded and turned her head, wiping her eyes, trying to hide it from him.

"What are you doing out here all by yourself?"

"I just wanted to be alone," she sighed.

All she had on was a nightshirt that came about mid thigh with a V-neck that showed off her perfect cleavage and a light jacket over it. "Do you want me to go?"

She stared at him for a second before shaking her head, "No."

He thought about Danny's last words as he walked toward her, but before he could contemplate his warning her face came into view as she leaned her head against the ladder looking at him. His heart skipped and then began to race. She looked so completely innocent and beautiful he could hardly breathe. He felt like he did that night standing on her porch sixteen years earlier.

"How did you know I was down here?"

"I was standing at my window and I saw you. It can be slippery down here."

There it was again, that concern for her well-being that touched her in so many ways. She hadn't had that in so long. She reached out and took his hand, "So you came down to check on me."

He only nodded as she squeezed his hand. '_Regret_,' he said to himself, '_don't do anything you'll regret_.'

She didn't know why at that second, but she started to cry again.

He didn't move toward like he wanted too. He kept his distance feeling his vulnerability around her.

"Always the protector. I know you would do the same for anyone, but it makes me feel special anyway." She looked up at him, "It's nice to feel special sometimes." She put her hand over her mouth, feeling embarrassed, "I'm like a blubbering little girl tonight."

It hurt him that a small gesture like that could make her cry. He could tell she was craving attention and that hurt even more. "You're special all the time. Don't you know that?" He lifted the back of her hand up to his mouth and kissed it. "If you ever need anything Carly, ever, you know you can call me, right? No matter where I am or what's going on in my life," he kissed her hand again, "you know I'll come."

She stared at him, completely taken back by his words, but more so that she knew he meant every word. "You really would, wouldn't you?"

"Of course I would." He removed a piece of hair from her shoulder, hoping that call would come someday.

"I'm so glad you came on this trip. I see so much of my old myself when I'm with you." She smiled up at him through her tears, "You bring out the best part of me."

His expression saddened, "Allan doesn't do that?"

She practically laughed at that statement. "No, I don't think he knows how, or even cares to try."

"You know Carly; marriage shouldn't have to be so hard all the time." He contradicted himself, grinning at her. "Coming from the guy who's never been married."

She smiled, hanging her head down, holding on to the ladder, "Sometimes I feel like, you know, I made my bed. I should try to make it work, but lately," she sighed, "it is getting hard."

"Then change beds." It was as if it spilled out of his mouth before he could stop it. It's what he'd wanted to say all along anyway. He thought about that word again; _regret_, but he didn't feel any of it.

Carly looked up at him. For just a split second she wondered if he was referring to his bed or not. She didn't have to wonder for long, her answer was staring back at her. It not only showed in the admiring way he looked at her, but also in the way he made her feel about her herself, and the genuine way in which he cared for her. He had done more for her in the last three days than Allan had done in the last six years. His outward appearance was undeniably attractive, borderline hypnotic and she was well aware of both of those qualities, as she stood there alone with him. "I'm married Steve," she reminded him, feeling his words and the moment becoming dangerously close to a place they may not be able to turn back from.

He reached up, pointing at her chest, "Are you married here," he then pointed at her forehead, "or only here?"

She had to think about that question, which in turn answered it for her.

"It's possible to have both Carly."

"From the guy that's never been married," she teased.

"I've just been waiting a long time for the right girl."

"What's she like," she whispered to him, "this girl?"

He had waited sixteen years to be this close to her again. She was asking who as if she didn't know. He didn't tell her it was her he wanted to show her.

Her heart began to race as she gripped the ladder trying to hold herself up. She was the one he'd been waiting for, and he was the one she had let get away. She had been fighting that awareness since that first day, but it was so crystal clear now she couldn't deny it any longer.

He wanted it so bad, it was right there, this beautiful, exotic woman who had captivated his thoughts and fantasies for sixteen years. All he had to do was take it.

"Carly!" They both heard Craig call out from the lawn and turned toward the voice.

Steve backed up getting a glimpse of Allan as he came off the deck.

"Carly!" he called out too, only his voice was raspy and not as eager.

She looked up at him, "I have to go. Stay here," she said almost as if she were begging him not to interfere.

He nodded, telling her he understood but stared down at her, wondering if this opportunity wouldn't surface again for another sixteen years.

She backed away from him, feeling herself being pulled in the opposite direction as they called for her out of concern, but it was difficult to leave him. She was torn and he sensed that, making her choice for her.

"Go," he let go of her hand and backed up into a dark shadow so they wouldn't see him.

* * *

He waited until they were inside and the lights were off in her room before making his way back to the house. He wasn't sure he was going to get any sleep that night. He glanced up at her room, wondering if she was lying awake as well. He thought about Allan's hands on her and a wave of anger, mixed with pain shot through him wrapping around his heart and squeezing until he had to put his hand on his chest to rub it away.

He was in trouble. He was in deep, serious trouble because he was in love and she belonged to someone else. He carefully closed the door behind him and went upstairs, not noticing Craig standing in the dark kitchen.

* * *

The next day was quiet. The weather turned on them and the low hanging clouds prevented any outside activities. Jules and Carly went shopping in town while the boy's hung out watching TV or reading and surfing the net. Allan spent most of the day upstairs, claiming he had some business calls to make. No one really believed him and no one really cared either.

Steve slept in most of the morning trying to recover from a restless night. He got up and went for a run, again trying to shake off the reason for the restless sleep. As he made his way back up the driveway, Carly and Jules were just leaving.

"Good Morning," Jules waved.

Carly stood by the passenger side door biting her bottom lip at the anticipation of him approaching. "_My god_!" she thought, "_he is so_…" she couldn't even justify what she was seeing with the right word, so many were possible. Trickles of sweat ran down the side of his face. His hair was wet from the rain and looked like he had just run his fingers through it, shaping it perfectly. His shirt was soaked and clung to his body, revealing the eight-pack abs and pecks that flexed all on their own. His legs were long and tanned from living in paradise.

He stopped in front of the car and smiled at her, seeing her for the first time that day. He'd just done maybe six miles but felt like he could run another ten just from the energy he got from being this close to her. "Hey."

"Good morning." The second she looked into those blue eyes she felt warm, feeling her face flush.

"Where are you ladies headed?" He put his hands on his hips, taking in a deep breath.

Jules spoke for the both of them. "Shopping in town. Do you want us to bring you back anything?"

He walked by Carly, grinning at her, "Nope, just be safe."

Jules got an irritated look on her face as she got in the car, "Jack told me not to spend too much money. Why can't he ever say something like that?"

Carly didn't reply as she got in, but watched him until he was all the way in the house. It was then that she let out the breath she didn't even realize she had been holding. She smiled and looked over at Jules who was staring at her like she could read her mind.

"Oh my god," she said to Carly.

"What?"

She shook her head and started the car, "You still have a crush on Steve."

Carly tried to laugh her off, "I do not."

"Yes you do," she argued, driving down the driveway and pulling out on to the main road. "Senior year. The New Years Eve party at Jessie Lyles' house."

"What are you talking about?"

"Right after he kissed you at New Years. You had that same look on your face." Jules laughed at the memory of she and Karen watching her, "Karen and I thought you were going to pass out. You just stood there staring at him as he walked off, the same way you just did."

She wanted to tell her about the night before but was afraid she would be angry with her. She had been up most of the night thinking about it and him. She had convinced Allan and Craig that she hadn't felt well and just needed some fresh air. Allan went right back to sleep and she lay there asking herself questions she had been avoiding the last few years. The one that bothered her most was the one that Steve had asked her; was she married to Allan with her heart or just her head? He had rolled over at that second and put his arm over her, something he hadn't done in a long time. It made her sad rather than happy. All it did was complicate things. She didn't want Steve to be the reason she was leaving him, if she did. She had only been re-acquainted with him for four days; she had a life with Allan for almost seven years. What if she jumped out of one marriage and landed in another relationship with someone she really barely knew. But even as she tried to convince herself of that, she knew it was wrong. She knew Steve. In many ways she knew him better than she knew her own husband, and vice versa. Her heart was pulling her toward him, but her loyalty was keeping her at bay with Allan. She started to convince herself that it was this place they were at. It was like an escape from reality and all her problems, and Steve, the gallant knight who shows up with all the qualities she wants. Her heart felt heavy at the thought of that. Something shifted the night before in their relationship. It was undeniable. But what if he was only caught up in the moment, reliving the past? He could have any woman he wanted. Why her, why now? She wasn't sure if he said those things because he was falling love with her, or the idea of her. It was a fine line between the two and she wondered the same thing about herself. How do you know after only four days? She felt something strong for him, there was no doubt about that, but was it reality or fantasy?

"Earth to Carly?" Jules said.

"What? Sorry," she chuckled. "Where should we start?"

"That's what I just asked you."

She smiled over at her friend, wishing she could tell her everything she was feeling, but what would she tell her? That she was thinking of walking out on her husband of six years to be with a man she's only been re-acquainted with for four days? "You're driving, whatever you want."

"Good thing I'm driving," Jules replied, "because you're over there in la la land." She glanced over at her, "There's nothing wrong with having a crush you know. It's perfectly natural, and Steve is defiantly the type of guy to have a crush on."

"You never had a crush on him, " she pointed out. "Did you?"

"No, I was always in love with Jack. Steve is more like my big brother. Karen had a crush on him. Only for about five minutes though."

"She did?" Carly looked at her shocked. "She never told me that."

"Of course not; she knew you liked him so Steve became like a big brother to her too."

It was surreal sometimes talking about Karen. The people in her everyday life never knew her so she kept her only in her thoughts. She very rarely ever got to talk about her. She loved that Jules told her that. Anything new she could learn about her sister was like a gift.

"You know sometimes," Carly began, "I think about how differently my life might have turned out if Karen hadn't died."

Jules parked the car in the mini mall lot and turned in her seat, "How so?" She knew she was talking about Steve but didn't want to open that up unless she did first.

"You know, college, marriage, my job."

"You don't think you would have married Allan?"

Carly stared out the windshield, "I don't know," she turned to her, "maybe I would have already been married if our paths crossed."

Jules smiled, "You mean to a Navy Seal?"  
She grinned and shrugged, "I don't know, maybe."

"I think you two would have been good for each other. Like Jack and I."

"You still love Jack just as much as you did in high school, don't you?" Carly asked.

"He's my best friend, my right arm. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost him. It would kill me."

Carly nodded her understanding, but also wanted to cry. She didn't now, nor did she ever remember feeling that way about Allan.

Jules reached out taking her hand; "I want you to know that I think of you as a sister, and that means that I will love you and support you no matter what. But I want to ask you a question and I want you to be honest with yourself."

"Ok," she replied, a little nervous over the nature of the question due to Jules intensity.

"When you picture yourself old and your children grown, sitting on that bench," she squeezed her hand, "who is sitting beside you?"

The first image that popped up in her mind made her cry. She turned toward the passenger window, wiping her fingers under her eyes. "What am I going to do Jules?"

"It was Steve wasn't it?"

"It's all happening so fast. I didn't know this was gong to happen." She turned to her, "I swear Jules I didn't come here to rekindle anything. I don't think he did either."

"I know that Carly. You don't have to convince me."

"I really wanted Allan to see you and Jack together and see how happy you are and how much fun you can have together." She laughed at how ridiculous it sounded now, "I hoped that somehow it would open his eyes to what we needed."

"Has anything happened between you and Steve?"

She looked her directly in the eyes, "No!" she bent her head, "but…"

"But what?" Jules asked.

"Last night we ended up down on the dock together. It was late and we were alone. I'm not sure now if it was even an accident. I think we might have crossed that line if Craig and Allan hadn't come out looking for me."

Jules jaw dropped, "Wow! What happened then?"

"Nothing, they didn't see him. But it was so hard to tear myself away to go to Allan. What am I doing Jules? I think I'm setting myself up for failure."

Jules sat back in her seat, cupping her hands over her mouth. She wanted to hug her and tell her to pack her bags and get on the first flight to Hawaii, but knew that's not what Carly needed. She needed to deal with Allan, no matter how much she wanted her out of that marriage it wasn't her life and it wasn't her place to encourage something so life changing.

"What am I going to do Jules?"

"Ok, first off you need to define your feelings for Steve and for Allan. Is whatever you're feeling for Steve worth changing your life? Or do you love Allan enough to work it out with him?"

"Allan is my husband."

"That's not what I asked you Carly. You have to get off this loyalty struggle you have going. I understand you take your vows seriously and you should, but if that other person doesn't meet you half way, then you can't live your life trying to make them, it will only get worse and worse."

She looked over at her, "I'm not happy with Allan right now."

"Then you need to tell him and you need to let him know what you need. Do you know what that its?"

"Yes," Carly bit her bottom lip as the tears returned, "It's what I have with Steve."

Jules heart went out to her. She looked so torn, "Oh honey." She took both of her hands, "Listen to me. You follow your heart Carly, no matter what your head is telling you, you follow your heart and you'll end up on the right side. I promise."

* * *

Steve sat down at the counter bar in the kitchen, drinking from a bottled water, "I was thinking about doing dinner tonight, what do you guys want?"

Jack turned around on the couch, looking at him. "You're going to cook?"

"Yes. I'm a bachelor, I had to learn to cook."

"That's what frightens me," Jack laughed looking over at Craig. "I have a feeling the main course is going to be Mac and Cheese with cut up pieces of hot dog."

"Hot dogs!" Steve protested, "That's disgusting. You have to use sausage, the juice mixes with the cheese and mmm." He put his fingers to his lips and kissed, imitating perfection.

"Or Spam?"

Steve made a face, "Have you ever had Spam? I just can't do it." He looked over at Craig. "What do you want? A nice big steak?"

Craig looked up from his laptop and shrugged, "Whatever man." He closed it a little too hard, picking it up and left the room.

Steve and Jack looked at each other confused.

"What's with him?" Jack asked.

"I don't know. Maybe he and Marissa had a fight."

"Why don't you blow off cooking and we'll go to that bar and grill again. That was pretty good."

Steve nodded, "I like that. I'll pick up the tab." He held his hands out as if mission accomplished, "no shopping, no cooking. I like it!"

* * *

They sat at the same table as last time. All pairs this time except for Steve. He sat at the head on the opposite end of Allan and Carly on purpose. He thought it best to avoid Allan and after the previous nights encounter at the dock, he wasn't sure how Carly was feeling about him either. His run in with her and Jules earlier that day had been pleasant but he still felt uneasy about what had almost happened between them. He worried maybe he had damaged their relationship by revealing too much of how he felt. He began to feel guilty for putting her in that position. He wasn't even sure she felt that way about him. Maybe it was all one-sided and she was just unhappy in her marriage and here he came along saying things he should have kept to himself. He glanced down the table at her and right on cue, she did the same. It lasted only seconds, but he thought he saw more sadness in her eyes than anything else. That didn't sit well with him.

Steve stood at the bar, paying the tab as the others left the restaurant. They all waited for him out front before walking back to the house. Carly watched from across the parking lot as the same intoxicated man from the previous visit approached them. He was unsteady on his feet and clearly drunk already.

'_Geez,_' she thought, '_poor guy needs to lay off_.'

As he made his way closer he recognized her too. "Hey! Itsh you again," he slurred.

Carly smiled uneasily as Allan observed from behind her.

"I swears you gets prettier every time I see you."

Carly chuckled at his compliment, remembering he was harmless, "Thank you."

Allan came up and put an arm around her, "Hey, that's my wife."

"Allan," Carly rolled her eyes at his attempt to warn the guy off when he was pretty close to being in the same state. "He's drunk," she whispered.

The man looked confusingly at Allan, "You're not her husband."

"Excuse me," Allan huffed.

Steve came out at that moment and the guy pointed at him, "That's your husband."

Allan turned and Carly could feel the mood change in a split second.

"What!" Allan snapped. He backed away glaring at her, "Why would he think he's your husband?"

Carly tried to calm the situation before it got out of hand, even though her insides were churning the chicken sandwich she just ate. "We were here the other night for dinner and he must have got the wrong impression."

"Seriously Allan," Jack jumped in, "it was nothing. The guy was hitting on Carly and Steve stepped in. The word husband never came up. The guy must have just assumed."

Steve walked up in the middle of the conversation, passing the drunken guy as he headed to the entrance realizing the mistake he had made and not wanting to be involved any further.

"That's exactly what happened," Carly said calmly.

Allan glared at Steve as he came up and then turned and began walking toward home. Carly caught up with him.

Steve held his hands out, "What? Did he not like his steak?"

Jack let out a deep, exhausted breath; patting him on the back, "Don't worry about it. He's being Allan again."

Jack got the group moving to the path that led down by the lake, avoiding the road that Carly and Allan took back. Craig took Marissa's hand and quickly moved ahead of them. Jack, Jules and Steve followed about twenty feet behind.

"You really can't blame him," Craig said out of the blue after five minutes of walking, he turned back to Steve, "Allan had a valid point to be angry."

"Well yea," Jack said, "if there was a point to be made, but there wasn't."

"How do you know?" Craig went on, his voice becoming more vocal.

"Because he was there," Steve jumped in. "and so were you and you saw what happened, nothing."

Craig stopped, "Yea, well I was there last night too." They all stopped as Craig let go of Marissa's hand and walked back to them, "Are you going to tell me nothing happened then either Steve?"

He knew exactly what he was talking about, even though no one else did, or so he thought. He didn't think anyone had seen him come back from the dock, but obviously Craig had. "Yes, I'm going to tell you that nothing happened last night."

"Bullshit!" Craig yelled. "You were out there at one in the morning alone with her and you're going to stand there and tell me you weren't fucking around?"

Jules walked up to Marissa who was staring at the two of them. She took her by the arm and pulled her down the path. "Let's go."

"Wait," she said, wanting to hear the gossip.

Jules pulled her again, "Marissa please!" she said, not wanting her to hear the conversation she knew was going to be the same one Carly had told her earlier that day. It was none of Marissa's business.

Marissa jerked her arm away but followed her anyway, glancing back every few seconds.

Steve kept his cool knowing that Craig was emotional about any subject that involved cheating. He looked right at him, "Yes, I'm telling you again, nothing happened last night." He cursed himself not wanting to lie to him and potentially ruin their friendship. "I'm not going to lie and tell you that I didn't want something to happen though."

"I fucking knew it!" Craig growled.

"This isn't like you and Mary!" Steve defended.

"It's exactly like that!" he pointed a finger accusingly at him, "You're sniffing around a married woman."

"You make it sound like I'm just out to get laid!"

"Isn't that what you were hoping for last night?"

"Fuck you, Craig! It's not my fault Mary left you to hook up with some younger guy from work! What's happening between Carly and I didn't just surface. It's been there for sixteen years. So don't put me in the same category of the chump that fucked your wife!"

"Fuck you Steve!" he lunged at him as Jack jumped between the two of them.

"Knock it off!" He put a hand on both of their chests and pushed them away. "What are you guys doing?" He shoved Steve back, "That was a low blow!" He turned to Craig, "You know their history as well as I do, and you also know Carly's. How can you stand there, seeing how Carly's been since Steve got here and knowing what we do about her pregnancy and still say she's better off with Allan?"

Steve looked back and forth between the two of them "Her pregnancy? What happened with her pregnancy?"

Craig's expression became pained rather than angry. He looked back at Jack as if contemplating whether or not they should tell him.

"Tell me!" he said, shoving Jack on the arm.

"Carly didn't actually have a miscarriage naturally."

He felt a shiver run down his back, "What do you mean?" he looked over at Craig, forgetting the confrontation. His concern turned to Carly.

"Allan accidentally," Craig sighed heavily, "so he says. He accidentally gave her a drug that he thought was an aspirin. It caused her to miscarriage."

Steve felt like he'd been punched in the gut. His expression mirrored the pain.

"Yea," Jack sighed, "I know. Jules doesn't know about this. We promised Carly we wouldn't tell her."

"How did you find out? Did anyone investigate it? That could have been attempted murder!"

"The ER doctor reported it as an overdose. The authorities investigated but nothing ever went to trial."

"How did you two find out?"

"I did," Craig said, "Allan hired a lawyer from the same firm that I use. I ran into him there. I called Jack and told him and we both decided to confront Carly on it. We were worried about her. She had told Jules that she had a miscarriage and then begged us not to tell her."

Steve shook his head in disbelief over what he was hearing, "What did Carly say about it?"

Jack shrugged, "She said it was an accident and that Allan was sick with grief over it." He looked over at Craig and both of their expressions showed doubt.

"What?" Steve said. "You don't believe her?"

"No," Craig said, "we believe her, we just don't believe Allan. When I saw him at the lawyer's office," he shook his head, "he didn't seem all that broken up over it. He explained it too me as if he was talking about some one else completely indifferent."

"Damn it Craig," Steve said bitterly, "why didn't you tell me this when you were with me in Hawaii?" He looked over at Jack, "Either one of you. I'm a police officer for Christ sake!"

"It happened six years ago Steve." Jack explained, "You were in the Seals at the time. Carly didn't want anyone to know anyway. Like I said it never went to trial and they never pressed charges. So the law believed him too. I don't know, maybe it was a legitimate accident. That was just our theory."

Steve closed his eyes shaking his head in disbelief, "I don't get it. Why does she stay? Why did she ever marry him in the first place? He is so wrong for her."

"She was pregnant," Jack reminded him, "You know Carly, she's loyal."

"Ever since Allan got here, she's become this…other person," Steve said still shaking his head.

Jack and Craig exchanged glances.

"Damn it you guys, will you knock that shit off or tell me what you're thinking."

"You've been away for sixteen years," Jack reminded him, "you don't know Carly like we do."

"What do mean?"

"Karen's death took a serious toll on her. It changed who she was. The person who has you baffled right now, that's Carly."

Steve chuckled like he was crazy, "What are you talking about? That's not Carly from the first couple of days before Allan got here. That's Carly!"

Craig stepped forward, "That's what we're trying to tell you. That Carly that you were with for the first three days, we haven't seen that side of her for sixteen years."

"What?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

Jack shrugged, "I think it was because you're here. You two fell right into step from where you left off. It was really good to see her having that much fun." Jack spoke to Craig but pointed at Steve, "It's because of him and you know it. You can't tell me he's not good for her."

Craig hesitated but knew he was right. Carly was like her old self around Steve, no one had been able to accomplish that for sixteen years and all he had to do was just show up. He nodded in agreement, "You're right." He turned to Steve, "And you're right too, this isn't like Mary. I'm sorry man."

Steve shook it off, "I owe you an apology. I shouldn't have said what I did. I was just pissed off."

Jack put a hand on each of their backs, "Ok, why don't you two just kiss and make up. C'mon, give each other a smooch."

Steve laughed, "You'd like to see that wouldn't you Jack?"

Craig joined in, "Yea, would that do something for ya buddy, because I'm seeing a whole new side of you."

Jack backed away from them with an annoyed look on his face, "Bite me!"

"Bite you?" Steve teased, "Wow, now it's getting a little kinky."

Craig burst out laughing as Jack walked away, holding his middle finger up over his head at them.

* * *

"Allan wait," Carly said, trying to catch up with him.

"What for? I don't even know why you had me come on this trip."

"Because you're my husband and I wanted you here." She ran and stood in front of him. "I was hoping that it might bring us closer together. It's no secret Allan that things haven't been going well for us."

"You mean for you," he snapped. "I don't know what you want from me Carly?"

"I want you to hear me when I tell you I'm not happy."

He rolled his eyes, "No wait, don't tell me, a baby would cure all your sadness, right?"

His reply couldn't have been more condescending and right. She did want a baby, but as she looked at him she wasn't sure if it was her conversation with Steve the night before or the one with Jules, but she didn't want one with him anymore. His attitude toward it now gave her an image of her pregnancy and life after. He would be no more supportive then than he was at this moment. It was as if a light came on illuminating the darkness she had been living in for sixteen years. She let herself fall into this place and become this person that she didn't even recognize. She didn't even know how bad it had become until she was able to step back and be around people who let her be that person again. One in particular who seemed to know just how to make her laugh and feel good about herself with little effort. She wanted to feel that way all the time and knew she wouldn't find that happiness with the man standing in front of her.

"No Allan, a baby won't cure it. I used to think it's what I needed to be happy. What we needed to fill the gap in our marriage, but I realize now it's not a baby."

"Then what?" he practically yelled, "What is it that you want?"  
"I want to be happy Allan! I want to laugh! I want you to look at me the same way that Jack looks at Jules!"

He moved closer to her, "Or the way that Steve looks at you? That's what you mean isn't it?"

"That would make it easy for you wouldn't it? Put the blame on someone else."

"I don't hear you denying it."

"You know what Allan," she glared back at him refusing to back down like she always had before, "I do like the way he looks at me, but not for the reasons you would like to think. He's been out of my life for sixteen years, yet he knows me better than you do. That's what I need." She went to move past him when he grabbed her by the arm.

"What's gotten in to you? Ever since I got here you've either been acting like a complete bitch or avoiding me all together. Maybe I'll just go home," he warned.

"Then go! I'm tired of trying to cater to your needs when you don't give a shit about mine!"

He gripped her tighter, jerking her arm, "You'd like for me to leave wouldn't you? That would give you and Steve ample opportunity."

She narrowed her eyes at him, "You don't get it Allan. I don't have to have a physical relationship with Steve for him to make me feel better about myself, unlike you, he genuinely cares about me and wants me to be happy." She tried to pull her arm away.

"Don't push me Carly."

"Let go of me!" She pulled away at the same time he released her.

"We're going home tomorrow!" he announced.

She walked backwards away from him, "You can go if you want. I'm staying the whole two weeks."

"If I'm leaving, you're coming with me!" he ordered.

She shook her head, "No Allan, I'm not. I'm staying right here." She turned and walked ahead of him. She could hear him behind her, following. She didn't have to see him to know he was fuming, but she didn't care. A smile slowly emerged on her face, feeling triumphant. She really couldn't care less if he stayed or not. She wanted to enjoy herself and refused from that moment on to make any more excuses for him. He was on his own.


	8. Chapter 8

Carly woke up early and headed downstairs. Allan hadn't packed anything the night before or spoken to her for that matter. She didn't take either one of those into too much consideration. She wanted to make breakfast for everyone and that's what was on her mind at the moment.

Steve came downstairs first. He stopped on the bottom step seeing her in the kitchen moving around like she was a short order cook. Back and forth between the fridge to the stove, back to the fridge, over to the counter and then rushing back and flipping bacon as she stirred OJ in a pitcher. Her long black hair was up in ponytail and moved from shoulder to shoulder with her. It was the most entertaining thing he had watched in a long time.

"Good morning," he said, walking over to her.

She looked over her shoulder, "Hi, good morning. Welcome to Carly's," she pointed to a chair. "Have a seat."

He took a seat and leaned over the counter on his elbows, getting a look at what she was cooking. He sat back in his seat as she turned around setting a glass of OJ in front of him.

"Do you want french toast or pancakes?" she asked with her hands on her hips, one still holding a spatula.

"Can I have both," he asked.

"Of course," she smiled, "anything you want."

He almost elaborated on that but decided against it. "So what's the occasion?"

She looked at him puzzled, "Breakfast of course."

"Ok. Do you need any help?"

"Nope, I'm enjoying myself."

"Well you look like you have things under control."

She leaned over the counter to him speaking quietly, "I know your fantasy is to have some woman cooking for you in nothing but an apron, but you're just going to have to settle for me."

His smile couldn't have been wider, "I'll take it, and for the record I don't consider that a disappointment whatsoever."

She smiled back at him, "Would you like bacon with your pancakes and french toast?"

"Yes Ma'am. You're just making this deal sweeter and sweeter aren't you?"

She wanted to reach over and kiss him. The banter between them made her morning even better than it already was. She looked over his shoulder, "Good Morning. I hope you're hungry."

Steve turned around seeing Jack and Jules walking toward him. He spoke to them in a southern accent. "Have a seat and Millie here will get ya some grits fired up."

They both laughed at him, sitting down at the counter.

"Do you need any help Carly?" Jules asked.

"Nope," she set down OJ in front of them. "Coffee all around?" she looked at all three of them for an answer.

They all nodded in unison.

"Where's Allan?" Jack asked. "He should be down here helping you."

She poured coffee into the cups, "No, I think it's better if I just work alone." She reached behind her for another cup as Craig came walking up.

"I've never seen this much action in my kitchen before." He sat next to Jules taking the coffee. "Thank you."

"Oops, flipping time." She set the pot down and flipped the pancakes in one pan and then moved to the french toast in the other.

Jules leaned over, looking down at Steve, giving him a look like 'what's up with her?'

He shrugged and was wondering the same thing himself. The last he saw she and Allan was the night before. They barely said two words to each other if that, and then went to bed separately. Whatever was with her, he liked it and hoped it stayed for a while. He was concerned over the new information he had obtained from Jack and Craig on the way home the restaurant, but after seeing her fresh attitude this morning, it hadn't crossed his mind once.

She set a plate down in front of him, with two each of french toast, pancakes, bacon, sausage and a smile that was more heavenly than the food. "Enjoy."

"Thank you."

She did the same for the others and then poured herself a cup of coffee watching them. "I thought maybe we'd get that race out of the way today Steve. What do you think?"

The others almost spit their food out laughing.

"Oh my God!" Jules roared. "That stupid race." She looked over at Steve, "Did you actually challenge her to a swim race again?"

"Damn right I did!" he said, with a fork full of food. "I'm going to win this time too."

Craig slammed his hand down on the counter laughing, "You've lost to her what, three times? Refresh my memory."

"Four!" Jack answered. "Well four that I was present at." He slapped Steve on the back, "You better win this time or your manhood could be at stake."

"Oh I'm ready. She's going down." He glanced up at her as was about to put another bite of food in his mouth and then stopped, dropping the fork on the plate. "I can't believe you!"

She looked down the row of people confused, "What?"

He shoved the plate away, imitating her voice, "Oh here Steve, have some pancakes and french toast and sausage," he picked up the bacon and then dropped it on his plate, "and bacon!"

"What are you talking about?" she looked at him like he was crazy.

"Is it just a coincidence that you want to race me on the same day that you fill me up with a lumberjack breakfast? I think not. You little cheat!"

Carly laid her head back cracking up, "You are being ridiculous."

"Oh am I?" he glared at her, picking up his OJ, "I think I'll just have orange juice, thank you very much."

She picked up the coffee pot, leaning over the counter, "You might want some more of this too. I hear caffeine makes people move quicker."

"You think you're pretty good, huh?" he said, giving her the stink eye.

"I know I'm good. I have six wins that say so."

"Six?!" he countered, "We've only raced five times."

She looked him straight in the eye. "I'm already counting today as a win, that's how confident I am."

The other three ooh and aah'd, cackling over the threat by Carly. Jack and Craig both made whooping noises, pumping their fists in the air.

"Go Carly!"

Steve tried to look intimidating but caved in. "Please," he begged, reaching out and taking her hand that was on the counter, "Please! Let me win just once. Just one time!"

She dropped her head down on his hand laughing at his pitiful expression.

Allan came up to the counter, standing behind him. "Hi. What did I miss that was so funny?" he looked at Carly as she raised her head up.

She let go of his hand and smiled, "Good morning Allan. Would you like some coffee?" she turned around and set a cup down at the vacant spot next to Steve. "Steve here thinks he can beat me at a swim race."

"Have you ever beat her Allan?" he asked him as he uneasily scooted on to the chair next too him.

"We've never raced before," he answered flatly.

"Lucky you. She's dangerously fast, it's humiliating." Steve grinned at her.

Allan took a sip of coffee and moved back as Carly set a plate of food in front of him. He looked up at her wondering if their fight from the day before was over and if she was going to leave with him in the morning, assuming her temper tantrum about staying the full week without him had cooled off.

"So what time are you racing?" Jack asked them.

Carly held her hand out gesturing to Steve for an answer, "You name it."

"High noon," he replied with a threatening glare toward her. He looked down the counter at the others, "Come to my funeral at noon?"

They all laughed as Jack grabbed his neck and arm, shaking him. "You're going to win this one buddy. You're going to do it for all us guys."

Carly looked over at Allan who stared at his plate of food, refusing to get involved in the game. She almost burst out laughing when Steve asked him if they'd ever raced. She wasn't even sure if Allen knew she was the state champion in high school. She was sure she had told him, but she was also sure he had forgotten ten minutes later. She glanced back at the others and smiled as they teased Steve, making her way down the counter away from Allan and more centered on them.

* * *

Steve and Carly stood on the end of the dock facing the water. Jack sat on one of the Jet Skis about fifty-five yards away playing the distance marker. Craig and Jules sat on the other one about halfway, videotaping it. Allan and Marissa sat on the deck watching, not interested.

Steve stretched his arm over his head, "Ok, so out to Jack and the first one back to the dock, right?

"Right," Carly said, bending over stretching her back.

"Are we diving or climbing down and starting."

"Whichever you want?" She re-tied her hair into a tighter ponytail.

"I want to dive."

"Then we dive." She smiled at him, "Ready?"

"Don't beat me by too much," he looked at her anxiously, "make it a close race, ok."

She eased him, "Don't worry Steve, I'm pretty sure my winning streak is going to end today. I'm not seventeen anymore and you are in better shape than most seventeen year olds."

"Don't patronize me Carly," he teased, nudging her. "Let's get this done." He looked over at Jules and Craig, "Ok!"

Jules yelled out with the video camera up to her face, "On your marks, get set," they both stood on the end and got ready, "go!"

They both dove in at the same time. Steve came out first, but as he took his first stroke, Carly came out right next to him and reached her arm out already swimming.

Allan finished off his beer and set it down next to the other empty bottle. He leaned over and took out another one. He saw them swimming and could hear the cheers coming from the others but refused to participate in it. It was stupid, a guy racing a girl? What kind of a challenge was in that? In his head Steve was only doing it so he could be closer to her. He wasn't blind. Carly was beautiful. He saw the way other men looked at her. Some of his greatest moments in their marriage were going places with her and the envious looks he would get from other men because she was with him. Or so he thought the attention was focused on him, but in reality, it was Carly they were focusing on. Her beauty was unavoidable and the fact that she was completely unaware of the attention she caused, made her even more attractive. The same beauty he used for his own self-gratitude was also the same beauty he would use against her, accusing her of flirting with men when it was the other way around.

He took a drink of beer and as they reached the Jet Ski.

Carly could see his arms, but wasn't sure if she was in the lead or not. The fact that he was still beside her gave her a renewed burst of energy. As they reached the Jet Ski, she went under doing a divers roll and then kicked off of it, coming out of the water all alone.

Steve reached out for the Jet Ski and then saw her do a somersault under the water and take-off without any hesitation. "Holy crap!" he looked up at Jack who was pointing toward the dock and yelling at him.

"Move your ass!"

He pushed off, reaching out with every stroke and digging deeper into the water. He felt the splashing of her feet and then could see her hands. He was gaining quickly on her. She must be getting tired he thought. He was going to win, finally! He heard her gasp, knowing she must have taken in some water, which meant to him she was struggling but still giving it her all. He knew they were getting close and suddenly the win didn't seem so important too him as it probably would to her. He kept his pace so it wouldn't be obvious but didn't dig as deeply in the water as he should have, letting her keep the lead.

She could hear Jules screaming for her to hurry and knew he was beside her again. She put her head down and reached out, not knowing why she wanted this win so badly? Maybe it was because her competitive side hadn't been able to surface for so long and she missed it. She also knew if she beat Steve he wouldn't be angry and sulk the way Allan would when he lost. She looked up between strokes and reached out grabbing the dock. She looked to her right and saw him reach out three seconds later. Jules screamed excitedly while Jack and Craig yelled out what a wussy he was and booed.

They both held on to the dock, catching their breath.

"Oh my god!" Carly breathed heavily, "I can't believe I beat you."

"Only by a couple of seconds!" he reminded her, enjoying the smile that he helped put on that beautiful face. It was worth every bit of shit that Jack and Craig were going to fling at him.

Allan polished off his third beer, watching them dry off on the dock. Marissa looked over at him, "She's pretty fast. Does she swim a lot?"

He popped the top off another beer and shrugged, looking over at her in the cut-off jeans and red bikini top. "I don't know."

"I can't believe she beat him again. I guess they have this competition thing going on since high school. That's what Craig told me."

"I guess so," he replied not really listening, more admiring the young firm breasts when he could get a glance in without her noticing.

"Craig said when they were in high school, they were pretty close." She caught him looking again at her chest. She wasn't sure if she liked it or if it annoyed her. He was kind of creepy in the way he did it.

"Yea I heard. She tells me all the time how close they all were." He rolled his eyes.

"It doesn't bother you that they dated back then and now here they are together?" She thought about that question and then corrected herself, "I guess it was a long time ago," she gestured toward him, "and she is married to you now."

"Carly and Steve dated?" he sat up.

"That's what Craig said. But it was for just a little while before her sister died or something like that." She bit her bottom lip, knowing she must have said something that he didn't know. "They were never serious." She tried to cover her tracks.

He got up off the chair as they came walking up to the deck. "So, you two were an item in high school. I'm surprised you never told me that Carly." He loved the blind side, catching people off guard.

She glanced down at Marissa knowing it must have been her that said something.

Marissa mouthed the word 'sorry' to her and scooted off the chair, grabbing her towel and headed for the lawn.

"So what," Steve dropped his towel on the chair she just vacated. "It was sixteen years ago and lasted about five minutes."

"I'm talking to my wife," he said to him.

"Well it sounds like you were talking to both of us." He put his hands on his hips, noticing the beer bottles next to the chair.

Allan ignored him, "So you've slept with him?" he asked accusingly.

"Allan," Carly said annoyed, "we were seventeen and went to Prom together, that's the whole wild affair story!" she said, making his accusation sound ridiculous. "No, we didn't sleep together. It was a terrible time for both us and you know that, so please don't bring this up as if you really care. How many office parties and conventions have I attended with women you pointed out that you actually did sleep with?"

"You pointed out women that you slept with?" Steve raised an eyebrow, "Wow, I'm not married and even I know that's a big mistake."

Allan's nostrils flared as he looked back over at him, "Mistakes, you want to talk mistakes. At least I never let her sister…"

"Allan!" Carly yelled over him, knowing exactly where he was going with this. She stood in between him and Steve. "Don't you dare!" she shuttered at the thought of it.

"You little prick!" Steve growled through gritted his teeth, on the verge of knocking Allan's out.

Carly shoved Allan backwards into the house, "Go inside!" Once he was in there, she closed the door in his face, turning back to Steve.

He looked at Carly and pointed toward the house angrily, "He deserves a bloody lip for that!"

"I know!" she was about to apologize to him for Allan's remark like she had always done in the past, but caught herself. "He has nothing else to hit you with Steve. This is all he has." She grabbed on to his arms as he stared past her into the house ready to pounce on Allan. "Hey! Don't play into this stupid game with him. You're too smart."

"Smart enough to know when someone needs an ass kicking!" He'd had it with him.

"What happened?" Jules asked as they came up on the deck.

Carly squeezed Steve's forearms, drawing his attention to her, "Nothing. It's not worth repeating." She spoke to the others but was focused on him.

He was mad as hell and if it wasn't for her, he knew Allan would have a bloody lip and possibly other parts of his face as well, but the second he looked at her he calmed. He felt her hands gently glide up and down his forearms, trying to soothe him. It worked. She had a power over him that he'd never let anyone have before. He liked that about her too. He nodded to her, "It was nothing."

She smiled, grateful for his patience and not for the sake of Allan, but for her concern for him. She knew Allan would probably have done something crazy like call the police or try to sue him for assault. She let go of him and went inside.

Allan sat at the counter pouring tequila over a glass of ice. "I'm leaving tomorrow," he announced, taking a drink of it.

"These people have done nothing to you, yet you find every opportunity to insult, criticize and just plain hate them!" she got angrier as she went on, "I don't understand you! Why are you like that?"

He didn't answer her. He didn't feel like he had to justify himself to her or anyone else there. He had nothing in common with these people and that was the end of it.

"Fine," she responded to the silence, "go ahead and sit there sulking and go ahead and leave tomorrow." She walked away, "I'm going Jet Skiing with Jules. You wouldn't know fun if it bit you in the ass."

He finished off the glass and poured another one.

* * *

Jules raced past Carly on the Jet Ski and turned in the opposite direction too quickly and knocked herself off.

Carly pulled up next to her as she sat in water. They both busted up laughing. "You are the only person I know that can fall off all on their own."

Jules climbed back on, "I'm going in. I have to pee. I just can't do it in the water. I'll be right back."

"Ok," Carly laughed, "I appreciate that bit of information. I'm going to stay out. Let me know if anyone else wants to ride. I'll come back in."

Jules nodded and waved as she took off for the dock. Carly stayed in the cove out front of Craig's house, racing back and forth, just playing.

Jules ran past the boy's standing in the yard, "I'm going back out. I just have to use the bathroom."

Jack ran after her, grabbing her around the waist from behind, "How bad do you have to go!"

She squealed with laughter as he tickled her belly. "Stop Jack!" She pushed down on his hands; "I'm going to pee in my pants!"

He dropped her and she turned and smacked him on the arm before darting into the house. Steve and Craig laughed, telling her to hurry because they didn't want diaper duty.

Allan stood at the window staring at Carly out in the water. His eyes were blood-shot and he swayed, reaching his hand out steadying himself on the glass. It made him mad that she was out there not caring that he was in here, angry and hurt over her deceit with Steve. He glanced over in his direction watching him talk with Craig and Jack. "Fucking asshole," he said out loud, bracing himself against the window again. He pictured him kissing Carly and considered going out and kicking his ass, but knew he couldn't. He wanted to go home tonight. He pushed off the window and staggered back into a chair, catching his balance. He was leaving tonight and she was going with him. He finished off the glass of tequila in his hand and set it on the table.

Jules came in the house and ran past him to the bathroom, not noticing him standing there. He walked outside and past the others, making his way to the dock. Craig noticed him brace a hand on the railing down by the water. "He looks a little tipsy."

He picked up Jules life vest and slipped it on over his shirt, trying to focus on the snaps. He only did two and began to climb down to the Jet Ski.

"Jules is going to be pissed," Jack said. "She wanted to go back out."

They saw him take off from the dock headed out toward Carly.

Carly stopped when she saw him coming toward her. She was still mad about his incident with Steve and thought maybe he was coming out to apologize and have some fun. As he came closer she realized that wasn't the case at all. The look on his face told her that. He was an experienced rider but seemed to be having difficulties. That's when she realized he was drunk. "Be careful Allan," she said as he glided up next to her.

"We're going home tonight," he said reaching out for the handles on the side seats of her boat.

"No I'm not. I told you I'm staying,"

He shook her boat angrily, "You're coming home with me!"

"You're drunk. You shouldn't be out here on that thing."

"Come back to the house and pack!" he demanded.

She put her foot on his boat and pushed herself off. "Go back to the dock before you get hurt." She started her engine and took off toward shore.

"Carly!" he growled, starting his engine and following her.

Jules came out of the house, joining the others on the lawn seeing her toy being used out in the water. "Ahh bummer." She shrugged it off and took Jack's beer from his hand, taking a drink.

"Feel better?" Craig asked.

She raised her drink up, "Much."

"I still want to see you water ski, Jack," Steve said.

Jack's attention was suddenly diverted, looking over his shoulder toward the water. "What is he doing?"

Steve turned around just in time to see Allan's Jet Ski ram the side of Carly's, throwing her into the air as his came over the top and landed on her in the water.

He dropped his beer on the ground and ran for the dock with Jack at his heels.

He was in a full stride as he came to the end and dove in the water fully dressed. By the time he came out and began swimming he was already a good ten feet ahead of Jack and leaving him behind with every stroke. His mind was screaming for him to swim faster. If he lost her he wasn't sure he would recover from this one. He looked up to get his bearings and saw her about thirty feet away, face down in the water. The boats were both capsized and he didn't bother looking for Allan.

He rolled her over, pulling her limp body towards the Jet Ski as Jack arrived.

"Flip it over!" he yelled to him.

Jack got both hands on the side and pushed himself out of the water, coming down on the side, rolling it easily. Steve climbed on as Jack held her. He reached over the side, grabbing her vest with one hand and pulling her up so she was sitting side saddle in front him, leaning against his chest. He took the key on her vest and put it in, starting the engine and racing for the shore. He looked down at her seeing the blue begin to form around her mouth.

"Carly!" he yelled, "Come on baby, hold on, almost there," he shuttered.

He didn't let off the throttle until they were on the shore. Craig grabbed the boat, steadying it as Steve climbed off with her in his arms and laid her down on the grass.

"Carly!" Jules screamed behind him, watching her face turn a pasty white.

"Call 911!" he said to her as he and Craig worked together quickly getting her vest off.

He kneeled before her and started mouth to mouth first, knowing she needed air. He did three repetitions and then straddled her legs, placing his hands just below her diaphragm and pushed up from her belly to her lungs, doing three repetitions of that and then moving beside her again to repeat mouth to mouth.

Craig backed out of his way, giving him room. "Come on Carly!" he said over and over.

Jack and Allan came up on the shore next to Carly's Ski. Allan stumbled off, falling in the water before gaining his balance and ran over to them as Steve was giving her mouth-to-mouth.

"Get off her!" he screamed at him. "Let me do it!"

Steve ignored him, straddling her again, trying to push the water out of her lungs.

"Get off my wife!"

"Shut up Allan!" Jack yelled.

When Steve moved to get in position to do mouth-to-mouth again Allan kneeled down across from him, shoving him on the shoulders as he put his mouth on Carly's. "I said get off her!"

Jack grabbed the back of his shirt as Steve sat up, grabbing the front of it, pulling him forward as he punched him in the mouth as hard as he could. Allan was unconscious before he hit the ground. He resumed his task without giving him a second thought.

He breathed over and over for her, but felt like he was losing her, it had been too long. "Come on Karen," his voice weak, close to panic, not even realizing what name he'd just said.

He felt movement from her and quickly straddled her again. Carly's head voluntarily moved to the side as he pushed up on her belly.

"Come on, Carly," he encouraged her. He pushed once more and a spray of water came out of her mouth. He pushed again and could see her mouth fill with lake water as she turned her head and it spilled out. She coughed on her own and he quickly rolled her over on her side. He held her head; tilting it just enough so she wouldn't choke as more water came out. Her body convulsed still in shock over the lack of oxygen. She continued to cough out bits of water and fight him as if she thought she was still drowning.

"It's ok Carly," he soothed her, "it's ok!" He leaned down to her face, "you're alright sweetie, just take slow deep breaths. I'm right here, you're ok now"

She moaned, reaching out and grabbing his wrist that was in front her. His words were calming and she knew more than anything else that he would take care of her, and if he said she was ok; then she was. Her body trembled and she took in deep breaths as she was told.

"Good girl," he whispered to her as the sound of a fire truck could be heard in the distance. She continued to cough until nothing else was coming out.

Jules pushed on Jack's arm, "Go meet the ambulance!"

He and Craig both scrambled to their feet, running toward the house. She kneeled down in front of Carly, taking over Steve's job of rubbing her back as she leaned over so her face was close to hers. "It's ok Carly."

She held her hand and continued to take deep breaths, her body still in shock over the ordeal.

Steve sat back on his hands, panting as Jules looked up at him in complete awe over what he just did. She would be dead if he hadn't been there. He crawled back away from her as they came running out of the house with the paramedics behind him. Jules did the same as one kneeled down next to Carly and the other went to Allan.

"He's just drunk!" Jules blurted out to him. "There's nothing wrong with him!" she pointed toward Carly, "She needs the help!"

He checked Allan's pulse and eyes, satisfied with her explanation and moved to join his partner with Carly. They began to work on her by first putting oxygen over her mouth.

It all seemed to hit him then as he sat up on his knees with his head bent. His body began to shake realizing how close he came to losing her, just like Karen. He felt a hand on his back as Jack kneeled down.

"You ok?" he said passively.

Jules came down to his aid as well, but in a more motherly way, by kneeling right in front of him and putting her arms around him and just hugging him as he trembled. "She'll be alright now," she reassured him. "You did really good, Steve."

He nodded feeling himself beginning to calm. He looked over her shoulder at Carly as she lay in the grass with the oxygen mask over her face that was beginning to regain color. He could see her talking to the paramedics, which in turn calmed him even more.

The ambulance arrived shortly after the paramedics bringing a stretcher out on the lawn.

Jules and Jack helped him up off the ground as they followed Carly around the side of the house to the awaiting ambulance.

"I'm going with her," Steve announced. "You guys have room for one more?" he asked the EMT's.

"Yes," they both said.

He waited outside the ambulance as they loaded her in.

Jules put a hand on his back, "We'll be right behind. I'll bring you some dry clothes."

He turned to Jack and Craig before climbing in; "I don't want to see Allan, unless he wants his ass kicked again."

They both agreed.

Jack gave him a wry smile, "No problem buddy."

He crawled in the back and took a seat up by her head.

They watched Carly reach back for his hand. He took it and put it up to his lips before they closed the doors.

Jules wrapped her arms around her husband's body as the ambulance drove off.

* * *

Steve, Jack and Jules stood outside Carly's room listening to the good news they had hoped for. The doctor explained she just had some bumps and bruises, but no concussion and they wanted to keep her overnight just to be sure she didn't develop a lung infection.

"She's sleeping now," he informed them. "I'll be back to check on her before I leave for the night."

"Is it alright if I stay with her tonight?" Steve asked. "I don't want her to be alone after this."

"Sure." He replied, "Stay as long as you want."

Steve shook his hand, while the others thanked him as well.

"Thank God," Jules sighed, leaning against Jack.

"Do you want us to bring you anything?" Jack asked him.

Steve shook his head. He should have been hungry but his stomach was still in knots over this even though she had been given the green light. "I'm ok."

Jules peeked inside her room and saw her lying on her side motionless. "I don't want to go in and wake her up. I think we'll just go, now that we know everything is good." She stood in front of Steve, reaching up with her hands, cupping his face, "Are you ok?" He nodded but didn't convince her. "Thank God you were there. She would have drowned." Her voice shuttered at the memory. No one said it out loud but they were all thinking of Karen. "You saved her life. None of us know how to do CPR."

Jack put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed, "You did good Buddy," he shook him gently, "especially that right hook." He made a fist with his other hand, pretending a quick jab. "Beat me too it."

"Sorry Jack, but I'm sure they'll be other opportunities with that guy."

"Probably. I'm glad they arrested him."

"They'll just charge him with DUI and reckless driving on the water. They'll let him sleep it off and release him into his own custody in the morning," Steve said.

"Good!" Jules snorted, "I think he's safer in jail than back at the house." She put her arms around Steve's neck and hugged him. "If you need anything call. I'm going to bring you something to eat later. It's already seven-thirty." She kissed his cheek before letting him go.

"Thanks Jules, but its ok. I really don't want anything." He smiled down at her. "Thanks for bringing me the clothes though."

"Here," Jack handed him a set of car keys, "It's to our SUV. Jules drove Carly's car here."

"Thanks. I'll call you if anything changes."

He waited until they were gone before carefully opening Carly's door and going inside. She was still sleeping on her side. The room was scarcely lit from the light in the bathroom. She had no machines hooked up to her, not even an IV. That was a relief, which meant she really was doing well. He closed the door quietly and went into the bathroom with the change of clothes Jules had brought him.

He came out as the doctor came inside. He tossed the pile of still damp clothes on the chair by the door. He was barefoot not wanting to put his wet shoes back on yet.

The doctor stood behind Carly with a stethoscope up against her back, listening to her lungs. He smiled, satisfied with what he was hearing, wrapping them around his neck. "Sounds good," he whispered, walking over to him. "I'm taking off, but there are two nurses on duty for the night. I'm also only about five minutes away if something should happen, which I don't anticipate." He looked over his shoulder at her. "I can't tell you how lucky she is. We have at least three or four downing's a year up here with situations just like this."

Steve nodded still feeling the after effects of the whole ordeal. He glanced down at her in the bed and couldn't help but think of Karen all over again, wishing he could have done the same for her. It was a bittersweet joy he felt over Carly's recovery.

He thanked the doctor again as he left and pulled a chair up to the side of her bed. He didn't see Karen anymore as he reached out, carefully moving some hair from her face, all he saw was Carly. The only visual mark he could see from the accident was a scape on her forehead.

He studied her, really being able to look at her for the first time as long as he wanted without having to turn away. Her long black eyelashes needed no enhancement as well as the flawless complexion. Her hair looked like black silk and it took everything he had not to run his fingers through it for fear of waking her.

He smiled at the shape of her nose, knowing what the phrase 'a perfect little button' now meant. He scanned down to her lips that were full and pink from the IV fluids they had given her earlier. They were slightly open and just like the rest of her, they were perfect, and just like her hair he had to fight off the urge to touch them. Her hand laid flat on the bed so he carefully slid his under, gently caressing the back of it, admiring how small and delicate it looked in his when she folded her fingers over his.

He looked up and she was awake, admiring him in the same way. He felt the impact of it shoot through his body leaving him blinded to anything else around him except for her. She pulled his hand closer to her body until it was nestled beneath her chin, holding it securely in place with hers.

She wanted to hang on to him as long as she could. It wasn't fair that she was married to a man who gave her nothing, while this one gave her everything, including a second chance at life, which she wanted to experience with him. She just didn't know how, and that broke her heart.

He watched her beautiful green eyes fill with tears as she bent her head down, gripping his hand with both of hers as if he might try to pull it away at any second. He leaned in, brushing her hair back, feeling a bump from the incident. "Don't cry, Carly. Please sweetheart, don't cry." His pleading just made her cry harder, which in turn broke his heart.

"I've made such a mess of my life," she sobbed.

"That's not true," he sighed, "you're still the same Carly I remember. You're just as playful, just as adventurous and just as beautiful as you ever were. I think maybe you just lost your way for a while."

She looked up at him as he gave her an encouraging smile, brushing away fresh tears on her cheek with the back of his hand. She loved him so much that it scared her. "I should have never let you go." She bent her head again, "Even back then I knew I was making a mistake," she gulped in air, "why did I do it?"

His throat tightened as he tried to swallow, "Because we were seventeen and we were both hurting," he had felt the same way about her, "and we didn't know losing each other was going to hurt more."

One of her hands glided up his up arm, feeling his strength, as her fingers tips glided back down touching his gentler side. Her eyes followed the path up until she could see his. "I don't want to make that mistake again."

They were the most powerful words he'd ever heard, coming from the sweetest voice he'd ever heard. "We won't," he assured her.

Neither one of them took into consideration her current marital status. Too Carly, any feelings she had left for Allan were severed the moment he took her life in his hands so carelessly, but she wasn't so sure it would have mattered anyway; she belonged right where she was. And to Steve, it only a came down to what was best for her. He wanted to be with her now more than he ever had, but he also wanted that decision to come from her without any influence or pressure on his part. He loved enough to let her go if that's what she wanted, but he also loved her enough to hang on for the rest of his life if he ever got her back. And that's exactly what he was going to do. The only dilemma he faced now was the 2,000 miles of ocean separating their homes. That wasn't going to work for either one of them.


	9. Chapter 9

Carly opened her eyes still in the same position on the hospital bed she had been in when she fell asleep. She rested comfortably on his shoulder with her arm across his chest. His held her securely in place around her back. She didn't move, not wanting to wake him and potentially lose this perfect spot she was in. She wanted to savor it for as long as she could, never remember waking up and feeling so alive and so alert so quickly. She attributed it all to him.

She watched his chest rise and fall as he slept and listened to his heartbeat, steady and calm. She imagined what it would be like to wake up everyday in this position, with this type of peace and awareness. It was wonderful and she wanted it.

She thought about Allan and not one ounce of her felt guilty or ashamed of where she was. She had absolutely nothing left for him. Even if she and Steve hadn't made the decision the night before she still would have left him. It was over between them, it was time for a new beginning, and she couldn't imagine sharing it with anyone else other than the person lying next to her.

She felt him move and lifted her head, sitting up on her elbow. His head was resting on the pillow, his eyes still closed. She looked at him and could still see the boy she had first fallen in love with, even through the twenty-four hour stubble on his face. He was even more attractive now then he was back then, which she found amazing, that didn't happen to most men, but he was blessed. She remembered the fun they would have together and got a jolt of excitement over rekindling that type of friendship with him, and more. She stared at his lips; so perfect, feeling a different jolt of excitement over the anticipation of a kiss from him. He was a good kisser before and she could only imagine how much he must have improved with experience. She almost moaned just over the thought of it.

She laid her head back down and closed her eyes, not willing to give him up for anything. She would even move to Hawaii if he asked. She really had nothing in San Diego anymore and she knew it would be more difficult for him to leave his job than it would be for her. It made sense to her, but would it to him? He had been a bachelor for so long, would he even want her there all the time? Would he even ask? Everything had happened so quickly that she wondered if he would want that separation for a while, before they jumped into a full-time relationship. It didn't matter to her, she had waited this long for him; she could wait a little longer.

Steve woke up as the nurse came in. She smiled at the two of them. "Good Morning."

Carly sat up slightly embarrassed as if they had been caught doing something. "I'm sorry about this. We just…"

She put her hand up, "Don't apologize. It's no surprise. I was in last night twice to check on you." She smiled at Steve. "If only all husbands were so attentive."

He when to correct her but didn't, liking the sound of it. "Everything sounds ok in her lungs then," he asked instead.

"Yes, everything sounds good. You can go home as soon as you sign some papers." She walked over to the door, "I'll be back in a couple of minutes."

"Ok, thank you." Carly sat up, looking at him. Once again he managed to give her that feeling that she was something special. "I feel really good."

He grinned at her, rubbing her back, "Did you sleep ok?"

She smiled shyly, "Yes, I slept great."

"Me too," he agreed, stretching his arms over his head and yawning into his bicep. "Ahh, coffee."

"That sounds good." She scooted off the side of the bed and stood up. She suddenly felt woozy as he reached out for her.

"Hey! Be careful. You had rough day yesterday. Just because you have the green light to go home doesn't mean you're fully recovered." He climbed off the bed still holding her arm. "Lay back down."

She sat down on the bed as he laid her back. "Just relax for a while longer. I'm going on a mission to find coffee." He picked up his clothes from yesterday and pulled out some money from the front pocket. He smiled holding it up to her, "It's still wet, but it still spends the same."

She put her hands up to her mouth and yawned, "Hurry brave hunter, go find coffee."

He slipped his shoes on that had dried just enough and walked over to the bed, "You like cream right?"

"Yes, please."

"Ok, I'll be back a couple of minutes." He leaned over and kissed her on the lips as if it was something he had done every day of his life. "Don't get up until I get back." He walked toward the door. "If I find you passed out on the floor, no coffee for you," he teased.

She didn't reply. She was still reeling over the kiss and how naturally it felt for him to just do it.

Steve walked out and stood in the hall thinking back over what had just happened. He was just as surprised as she was. He didn't even remember thinking about it; it just came on so naturally. He shrugged it off and went about his mission.

* * *

The rain drizzled as Steve leaned over Carly, pulling the seatbelt across and fastening her in as the doctor gave his last bit of advice.

"If you feel pain in your lungs, or a consistent cough, come back for some x-rays. Make sure you get some rest," he spoke to Carly first and then to Steve, "nothing too strenuous for a couple of days. She could feel some dizzy spells. If she does actually pass out, bring her back in."

"Alright. I'll keep an eye on her. Thanks again for everything." He shook his hand again.

Steve climbed in the other side of Jack's SUV and looked over at her. "Do you feel ok right now?"

"Yes, I don't feel any of those things he mentioned."

He liked the sound of that, "Good. Are you hungry?"

"Yes," she sighed, "I'm actually starving."

"Me too. There's a place I saw not too far from here. Do you want to go eat?" It was true he was hungry, but he really wanted to get a feel for how she felt before going back to the house. Yesterday had been an emotional time for her and he just needed to know if she still felt the same.

"Sure."

The rain began to come down harder as they pulled in to the parking lot of the small diner. They ran to the entrance that was covered by an awning seeing a sign on the door.

'_Closed due to Grandchild being born.'_

They both looked at each other and laughed.

"I guess in a small town you can close whenever you want." She moved closer against the wall by the door as the rain picked up. "Wow, that was a quick turn around."

"I'll go get the car." He went to go when she grabbed his arm.

"No! It's raining too hard, you'll get soaked. Just give it a minute."

He looked up under the cover as it came down even harder. He could barely see the car that was only about fifty feet away. "Damn, the gates opened up." He leaned back against the wall opposite her.

They stood silent for a minute before he finally spoke up to what was really on his mind.

His expression went from relaxed to a little uneasy, "I think we should talk before we go back."

She looked over at him, knowing exactly what he meant. He wanted to clarify the night before. "Ok."

He toyed with the keys still in his hand, "Do you feel differently now that's its morning?"

She wasn't sure if he was asking her if she had changed her mind or if he was hinting around that he had changed his. She couldn't blame him if he had. She had so much baggage that she would be bringing into this relationship, and it was all named Allan. Even so, she felt her insides begin to tremble at just the thought of losing him again. "No and yes."

He looked over at her for clarification, feeling the same turmoil going on inside of him.

"No, I don't regret one thing I said to you last night, and yes, I woke up this morning knowing that no matter what happens with you and I that it's over with Allan." She bent her head, staring at her feet, "I won't go home with him."

It was exactly what he was hoping to hear. He thought about his next question, considering the impact on himself first and how it would change his life, but he felt no anxiety and no fear, maybe with someone else he might have, but not with her. It was total clarity and an acute awareness of where he wanted his life to go from this moment on. "I was thinking," he paused, suddenly overcome by a wave of nerves as if he was a kid asking the Prom Queen out for a date, not quite sure what the answer was going to be but knowing whatever it was, both could be life changing. He could never remember putting himself so far out there on a limb before for anyone. He looked over at her, wanting to see her initial reaction. "What if you came home with me, back to Hawaii. Would that be something you would consider?"

She felt her body flush over his question but it was the way in which he delivered it that really felt good. It wasn't just a line or an impulse decision. He wanted it as much as she did. All he had to do was look at her and she could feel herself being lured in. He was like a magnet and it was impossible to fight the attraction. She let go any hesitation or doubt, willing to give up everything in her life just to follow him wherever he took her, knowing it would be worth it. "Yes," she didn't have to think about what it meant, because it was the question she'd been hoping for. "I think I would like that very much."

Her reaction was even better than he had expected. He pushed off the wall and stood in front of her, looking into his future as it stared back at him. She was so beautiful and he knew in his heart and his head that he was making the right decision, but he also wasn't naïve to the fact that he'd lived alone for most of his life and he had habits that she wouldn't be accustom too. They were basically jumping in feet first without touching the water first. "There are some things you should know about me first. You might change your mind."

She almost laughed, because at this moment there wasn't anything that he could have told her that would have discouraged her, beyond having someone else in his life there. "Are you married with children?" she grinned.

He loved her playfulness; it's what had attracted him to her in the first place. "No, but I can be stubborn. Some people find that annoying." He thought of Danny, who considered him the poster boy for stubbornness. But somehow he knew Carly could sway him better than Danny could. "But in my defense, I have a weakness for you."

She smiled at his honesty, "I won't take advantage of that, I promise." She put a hand on his chest, confessing her own worst habit, "Sometimes I get really quiet when I really should be voicing how I feel, but in my defense, I don't think I'll be afraid to talk to you."

He moved closer until they had very little personal space between them, "I'll watch for that. Sometimes I work really late hours, and it can't be helped, but I promise I'll call if I do."

She reached up, slipping her hand behind his neck, "I promise I'll understand, because I know how much it means to you."

He kissed her once for that comment, putting an arm around her waist and bracing the other one on the wall, pulling her close, "Sometimes I leave my dirty dishes around the house."

She smiled, enjoying the fact that neither wanted any surprises, "I fall asleep in front of the TV."

"I drink milk out of the carton."

"I eat ice cream out of the container with a spoon."

He smiled, brushing his lips against hers, "So do I."

It was the most enjoyable seduction she'd ever experienced and also the most erotic. She couldn't remember ever wanting anything so bad in her life at that moment than his lips and his hands on her. "I'll make you so happy you'll want to rush home to me every day."

That did it for him. He leaned her against the wall and kissed her.

The rain poured down just two feet from them but neither one could see past the other person.

She knew he was going to be a good kisser but his matured technique was beyond anything she had ever experienced. He was patient and really seemed to enjoy it just as much as she did, all the way up to the point when he broke away, still coveting her lips with his, as if he too were unable to break away completely. Her hands held him in that position as he pinned her against the wall.

He'd never felt so completely helpless and vulnerable to another person; it terrified him that she might change her mind. "Don't leave me behind again, Carly." He held her so tightly he was afraid he might hurt her, but at the same time, he couldn't let go.

She let her hands slide down from around his neck, cupping his face as he rested his forehead against hers. "I'm exactly where I've always wanted to be. Why would I ever give that up?" she pulled his face up so she could see him. "I love you. I've loved you since the first time you kissed me on my porch. You're never going to get rid of me," she smiled and then kissed him, letting him know she meant ever word she said.

He was completely blown away by what was happening to him. He knew he was in love with her after that first night they sat on the deck together, but what he was experiencing at the moment was a profound need for another person that he never had before. He never needed anyone, but he understood now why she stayed with him all those years and why he was feeling this need for her now, he fell in love with her too that night standing on her porch, and just like her, he was never going to give it up.

* * *

Carly and Steve came in the house and noticed right away Allan's bags sitting by the door all packed. Craig came around the corner and straight up to Carly putting his arms around her, hugging her longer than usual. "Thank God you're alright." He finally released her, kissing her cheek and bending his head, quickly distinguishing the tears that formed. He looked over at Steve, "You were unbelievable man. I'm taking CPR lessons as soon as I get home. I don't ever want to feel that helpless again."

Steve smiled out of the corner of his mouth, "Good! It's something no one ever thinks they need, until they do."

Craig looked at the bags and then at Carly, "He's on his way back. The police called a couple of minutes ago and said he made bail and knew he would probably be coming back for his stuff and his car. They wanted to make sure that was OK, and there wouldn't be any problems. I told them he could pick up his luggage but then I wanted him out. Jack and I packed him up last night." He put his hands on her shoulders, "What do you want to do?"

"All I need is about two minutes with him and then I don't want to see him again."

"Ok." He rubbed his hands over her arms. "It's pretty wet out or I'd go on the deck, but I'll be in the office. The others ran to the store to get some groceries." He looked up at Steve and motioned for him to come with him.

"I'll be there in a minute," he responded.

Craig took that as a departure request and walked towards the office door.

Steve put a hand on her waist, "I don't want you to go upstairs with him. Stay down here where I can get to you. I don't trust him."

She nodded in agreement, knowing that was probably a wise decision. She didn't think Allan would try to hurt her, but then again after the day before she wasn't sure what he was capable of, especially once she told him she was leaving him. "Ok. I want to be alone with him though."

"Of course. I'll be with Craig, but if it gets out of control or you feel any kind of fear Carly," he gave her a stern look, "you get away from him and you come to me or you call for me, ok?"

"I will," she promised.

He knew things could happen in the blink of eye and felt uncomfortable leaving her, but she needed privacy with him. He pulled her against his body playfully with his arm. "Remember the ending scene of last of the Mohicans?"

She chuckled remembering the discussion behind the waterfall of that movie, "Didn't they cut his head off?"

Steve raised an eyebrow, "I was going to mention how she fought back, but you sound like you have it all under control."

She laid her head on his shoulder, hugging him back, "I'm a little nervous."

He leaned back so he could see her face, "Hey, you don't have to do this now. Craig and I can just send him on his way."

She shook her head, "No, I want to get it over with and I want to move on."

He lifted her chin up and kissed her. "Ok, if you need me…" he pointed toward the office as he released her, "I'll be right in there."

She felt better knowing that and sat down on the bottom of the stairs and started to go over in her head what she was going to say when she heard Allan's phone buzz. She saw it sitting in flap of one of the bags and took it out. There were several unread texts on the screen, all coming from the same number. It was the same one she remembered as the other day. She flipped the bar to the side and began to read them one by one.

_'R u meeting me.'_

_ 'Call me back.'_

_ 'Where r u!'_

_ 'hello!'_

_ 'last request Allan!'_

Carly sat down on the bottom step of the stairs and called the number.

Steve went in the office and closed the door behind him. Craig was sitting behind a mahogany desk so he took a seat on the leather coach by the wall.

"So she's really ok?" he asked him.

"Yes. I just need to keep an eye on her for any fainting spells or if she starts to develop a cough. It could lead to a lung infection."

"I wonder what she's going to do now?" he looked over at him, "Did you two talk about that at all?"

Steve leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees. "Yes." He wasn't quite sure the reaction he was going to get from him. "She's coming home with me." He glanced over at him after he said it.

Craig made a face as if he was contemplating that answer but not too surprised by it. He crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair, "For how long?"

Steve shrugged, "For as long as she can put up with me." He grinned at him, "which could maybe be two days at the most."

Craig huffed, "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

He sat back, "Yes. We both do. I now it seems like we're jumping into this, but we're really not, well maybe…" he went to correct himself when Craig put a hand up stopping him.

"You know what," he felt his question was intrusive, "you don't have to justify it to me, or anyone else. I know what you feel for her, we all do." He laughed at him; "it's been obvious since she showed up. I hope it works out for you two. I really do. Besides Jack and Jules, I've never seen two people who mesh quite the way you and Carly do."

"Thanks Craig, I appreciate that." He looked outside as the rain began to pick up again, when they both heard the front door close.

Carly pulled the phone away from her ear and stood up as he came in, holding it by her side.

Allan stopped when he saw his luggage packed. He went to make a move toward her when she held her hand up. "Stay there."

"Carly," he looked tired and disheveled still wearing the clothes that had dried on his back, but she knew he was just hung over. "Are you alright?"

"I want a divorce Allan." She stared straight at him, not feeling the nerves she had earlier, just seeing him confirmed her decision even more.

"I'm sorry about what happened. Let's not get crazy and make any rash decisions. You've been through a lot and you're emotional right now."

Carly started to laugh at his ridiculous attempt to save himself. She was amazed at how he refused to take the blame for this as well. "I'm not being emotional Allan. I'm finally thinking clearly for the first time in a long time and I'm not coming home."

His attitude changed from apologetic to impatient. "It was an accident Carly. I said I was sorry. I'll stop drinking."

"What about your extracurricular affair?" She refused to back down, even when his expression turned angry.

"I don't know what you're talking about?"

"Yes you do. Her name is Lisa and she's a flight attendant, but I'm guessing there are more either now or in the past." She could tell just by the look on his face that he knew he was caught.

"She means nothing to me Carly." He lied, "It was one time and now she keeps calling me over and over and wants some kind of relationship. I want nothing to do with her. I swear Carly. I love you. I just want to work this out."

She stared at him wondering how she had let herself become manipulated by him for so long. She felt like such a fool.

"Carly," he said passively, "just go pack and let's go home."

She lifted the phone in her hand up to her ear, "I would run as fast as I could if I were you," she said into it and then handed it out to him. "It's for you."

He didn't move for several seconds and then snatched it from her hand. She almost yelled out to Steve just from the hatred in his eyes as he glared at her.

"Yes," he said into the phone, his stare never wavering from her.

All Carly heard was a loud voice on the other end scream out, "Fuck you Allan!"

He let the phone drop to his side. "You aren't going to get shit in this divorce. Do you hear me," he growled, "Don't even bother coming home."

"I didn't plan on it," she countered, keeping her cool, "and don't think for a second Allan that I'll back down because I won't. I just want what's mine."

"Don't threaten me Carly!" he took a step toward her but she stood her ground.

"Don't try to intimidate me Allan."

He looked around the room and up the stairs, "Where is everyone?"

"You should get your things and go."

"Where's Steve," his voice was low as he moved closer to her. "Huh? You spoke to my fuck buddy, where's yours?"

"I'm not going to play along with you Allan."

"That's why you aren't coming home, isn't it? You're going with that asshole."

"Go to hell Allan!" she went go by him and he stood in her way.

"You know what's going to happen? He's going fuck you for a while and then dump you're ass. And you're too fucking stupid to see it coming. When he's done with you, don't come crawling back to me. Your dead sister would be a better lay."

Carly pushed him back and slapped him as hard as she could across the face. He reached out, grabbing her by the throat, pushing her back on the stairs as she screamed out for Steve. She fell backward trying to pull his hands away when the next things she knew he was being pulled off of her and she heard Jules scream.

Jack grabbed him around his neck from behind and yanked him backwards off of her. He flung him into the wall and hit him once in the gut and then again in the face. Allan doubled over and covered his face as Jack hit him again, breaking one of Allan's fingers as he tried to protect himself. He stood back, fists clenched ready if he came at him.

Steve came running in with Craig behind him. "Carly!"

She pushed herself up from the stairs, "I'm ok."

He took her by the arms, looking at her face for any sign of battery, "Are you sure you're alright? What happened?"

"I'm fine." She looked at Jack who was fired up and ready to take on the next guy. "He grabbed me and Jack came in."

"Grabbed you where?" he said concerned.

She touched her throat, "Here, but I'm fine."

Steve moved her hair and looked at the red marks on her neck. His furry equaled Jack's as he turned and leaned over, picking a stunned Allan up off the floor by his throat. He slammed his body against the wall. "Let's go outside and have a chat." He lifted him up by the back of his neck so he could barely walk, and as he went by Jack he gave him a slight head toss, or as Jack took it, a silent thank you for helping Carly.

He walked Allan out to his car and spoke to him while still holding him by the neck. "Carly means a great deal me Allan. I know that you don't know me, or maybe you think that you do, but one thing you should you know is that I'm very," he took a deep breath and let it out slow, wanting to break his neck, "very protective of the people who are close to me." He bent him over the hood of the car so his face was smashed into it. The rain came down on the both of them. "I know about the pregnancy and it's probably a good thing that I don't know what else you've done to her, but I'm warning you," he pulled him back up so they were face to face, "If you ever put your hands on her again. I will hurt you, Allan. I'll hurt you really, really bad." He let go of his neck as Allan reached up, putting his hand over the spot.

They both turned as Jack and Craig came out each one holding one of his suitcases and just flung it toward the car.

He coughed and wiped the blood off his mouth from Jack's punch. He looked up at him but didn't make eye contact. "I just want to get my stuff and get out of here."

"Keys are in the car." He slapped him on the back a little to hard, "you have a safe trip now."

He walked back up by the door under the cover and turned around, crossing his arms watching him pick up his luggage and throw it in the car. What he wanted to do was bury him somewhere, he had a really bad feeling that they hadn't heard the last of Allan. He was just glad Carly was coming home with him to Hawaii; at least he knew she would be safe as long as she was with him. That he could guarantee.


	10. Chapter 10

**So sorry it took so long to post. I wrote this chapter and then didn't like it and re-wrote it...**

* * *

Steve came out of his room freshly showered and shaven. He walked down the hall and glanced in Carly's room as he passed. She stood looking out the window, recently showered as well and wearing a white sundress. Her hair laid straight down her back and he just stood there for a minute admiring her.

She looked over her shoulder, feeling another presence and smiled at him, "Hi. Look at you all clean-shaven."

He rubbed his hand over his face, "You like that?"

"Yes, but the other is nice too." She leaned in just a bit and whispered loudly, "I like you any ole' way."

It's not what she said, but the way she said it that about knocked him over. As he walked toward her he was quite positive there wasn't one single thing about her that wasn't sexy as hell in his opinion. He wanted to drag her back to his bed and peel off the sundress she was wearing and unveil what he knew without a doubt was a spectacular work of art. How could it not be, every visible aspect of her he was seeing at the moment was stunning. He could only imagine how good she would feel; that soft skin and being able to look down on that face. He wasn't so sure she was ready for that yet though. She had only been officially separated for a couple of hours and here he was selfishly contemplating his seduction to get her into his bed. His only justification was that he'd been waiting for her for sixteen years and the fact that she was like a walking goddess didn't help either; but he loved her and resolved to the fact that he wanted what was best for her, his needs could wait.

He brushed the hair off her shoulder, examining her neck where Allan had grabbed her. "Are you ok?"

"What? Oh yea," she shrugged that off; "I'm fine." She looked back outside as the rain gently splattered on the window. "Jules told me what happened yesterday after Allan hit me in the water."

He didn't want to think about that again. He didn't want to relive it or talk about it. "It's over, it all turned out well."

"Jules said that you were so focused that at one point Allan tried to interfere and you knocked him out."

He vaguely remembered that part. He was focused, but not because it was just a crucial situation, because it was a crucial situation that involved her life and just thinking about how close he came to losing her wasn't something he wanted to dwell on. He didn't reply but just nodded.

"Are you ok?" she put her hand on his stomach recognizing an uneasiness that suddenly overcame him.

"Sure."

"Thank you for what you did yesterday."

He stepped back, "I don't want to talk about it. You don't have to thank me either."

She was surprised by his response, "You saved my life Steve."

He rubbed his hand over the back of neck, "Carly please, just drop it ok?"

She knew it was just as Jules had said. It had hurt him more than he was letting on. At one point she told her that he had even called her Karen. She didn't want to push him and just let it go as he asked. "Ok, I'm sorry." She turned back to the window looking down on the grass where she had lied dying, until he breathed life back into her. She didn't care what he said; she was thankful and would repay him. Action spoke louder than words anyway, she thought.

"Hey," he kissed her on the temple, "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be a jerk about it."

"You're not," she assured him, changing the subject. "I'm hungry. I bet you're starving." She watched his whole attitude lighten up in the blink of an eye.

"I am. Whatever Jules is cooking down there it smells really good."

"She's a good cook." She scrunched up her nose, "me, not so much."

"Can you boil water?"

She laughed, "Yes! Yes I can."

"Then you can make spaghetti, mac and cheese, the list goes on."

She gripped his bicep, "I'm sorry but you don't look like you live on spaghetti and mac and cheese."

"No," he confessed, "but I'm not a picky eater, and nowhere has it been stated that you have to cook for me either."

She raised a finger, "I got it," she smiled up at him, "I'll just wear an apron with nothing underneath and you won't even notice what you're eating."

He laughed, "Hell, if you did that every night you could feed me peanut butter and jelly and I'd think it was filet mignon."

She started to laugh and then suddenly started coughing, putting her hands over her mouth.

He put a hand on her back, trying to rub it away. "You ok?"

She coughed and nodded at the same time as it slowly went away. She took in deep breaths, gasping a couple more times before it vanished completely.

"Is that the first time that's happened?" he asked concerned.

"Yes."

"What about feeling dizzy?" he questioned her, putting a hand on her forehead to feel for a temperature.

"No nothing like that." She took in a deep breath, showing him she was fine. "It's all good."

The concern on his face was touching. It made her feel good until she realized if he was this concerned over a cough then how must he have really felt when he was giving her CPR. She never knew that type of love before but she was certain that's what it was. She didn't thank him by words knowing he wouldn't like it so she laid her head on his shoulder and hugged him.

He could have stayed in this position the rest of the day and been perfectly content. "I mean it when I say I don't expect for you to cook for me."

"What do you expect?"

He hadn't thought about that question, mainly because he didn't expect anything. He just wanted her there. He pulled back so he could see her. "I expect you to be happy and if for some reason you're not I want to know about it."

"We discussed this trip for about ten seconds and now it's happening. I really do want to come with you, but I don't want to interrupt your life."

He thought that was amusing. "It's too late for that, Carly." He put a hand on his chest, "I like what's happening. I'm anticipating the changes. I'll make room for you everywhere in my life and it won't be a burden."

Those were the sweetest words she'd ever heard. It sealed the deal for her. "I can't wait to see your house."

"I think you'll like it."

"Is it close to the ocean?"

He smiled, "That's my backyard."

Her eyes got big; "Really?" she was getting more and more excited. "How many bedrooms does it have?"

"Two."

"Hmm, is that a guest bedroom or an office?"

"It's a guest bedroom." He had a feeling he knew where she was going with this but let her take the reins.

"Is that where I'll stay?" she bent her head, biting her bottom lip slightly embarrassed but still wanting to get it out in the open now rather than standing in the living room of his home.

He squeezed her around the waist, pulling her close, sensing her uneasiness and not able to resist teasing her over it. "You in the guest bedroom? I don't expect you to cook for me, but I do expect sex at least four times a day."

She looked up at him, "Only four times," she whined, knowing he was teasing and returned the fun, "that's hardly worth the trip."

He loved that playful side of her so much, and couldn't deny that it was actually turning him on as well. Just the hint of her being in his bed at home was like an aphrodisiac. He glided his hand down her hair, "You're going to be one surprise after another aren't you?"

"I promise you won't be bored."

"I never have been with you. And as far as the other goes," his expression was nonchalant, "there's no rush. I don't want you to feel that just because you're coming home with me there are expectations, because there's not. Even as beautiful as you are and as tempting as it may be," he glided the back of his hand over her throat, grinning, "I've been trained to resist temptation."

"You think I'm tempting?"

He raised an eyebrow, "Carly Amber Burke, you drip with temptation."

She loved that he used her maiden name. He looked at her as if he wanted to consume her right then. It made her feel sexier than she ever had in her life. He was a gifted kisser that she knew would reflect on the rest of his love-making as well, how could it not, she thought. She was going to Hawaii with him and would potentially be sharing his bed with him. She knew it, and he knew it. It was just getting over that initial first time that was difficult. They had so many obstacles in their way. She wanted to be with him, but Allan probably wasn't even out of town yet, and here she was contemplating on when she could sleep with another man. It wasn't in her nature, and regardless of her terminated situation with Allan, it still made her feel uncomfortable. But he wasn't just another man either, she told herself, it was Steve and even though they had so many years lost between them he still knew her, the real her. She wanted to start her life again and be that person, and being with him made it seem so easy, yet she was scared now that it was all coming together.

He saw it on her probably at the same time it crossed her mind. He didn't know what was concerning her but he could see it. He had always been able to read her, even when no one else could. He sat down on the windowsill, "Spill it."

"What?" she looked at him peculiarly, "Spill what?"

He took her hand, "If this is going to work, you have to be able to trust me and you have to be able to talk to me."

And there it was, she thought, how easy is that? He pulled her down so she was sitting on his leg. She put her arm over his shoulder, looking at him as he put his arms around her waist, showing her it was safe.

"I guess I'm just a little nervous about…" she paused, "I know we joke about it, but…" she paused again.

"Sex?" He finished it for her.

She shook her head and rolled her eyes at his casual way of blurting it out. "Yes."

"Ok, what is it that makes you nervous? Is it me?"

"No!" she quickly replied but then corrected herself. "Well, yes and no."

That answer made him a little nervous. "It's ok. Is it something I did or said? Or maybe something I haven't said or done?"

"No Steve," she wanted him to put that right out of his mind, "I think you're wonderful."

He liked that better.

She was embarrassed talking to him about it. She and Allan never discussed their sex life, and even when they did it was always something she was lacking, it was never something she felt she could bring up. She didn't want to be that way with him.

He didn't want to push her but then he felt if he didn't the subject would be tossed aside, and this was a very big subject that they needed to get out in the open. The sooner she realized she could trust him the better. "Hey, look at me."

She lifted her head and met his eyes. He wasn't annoyed or impatient by her silence, but smiled as if he understood.

"You know me Carly and I know you. We aren't just two people who met on a vacation and decided to start up a relationship. This had been coming together for a long time." His smile faded knowing he had to breach the subject sometime and better sooner than later, he wanted him out of their relationship as soon as possible. "I don't know what kind of communication you had with Allan, but I'm guessing it wasn't too good."

She shook her head, "No it wasn't."

He put a hand on his chest, "I'm not Allan. I don't want you to bring what you had in that relationship into ours. You have to trust me Carly and I know that might take some time, and that's ok, I understand. But you also have to feel that you can talk to me. This will never work if we can't communicate with each other." He hated been that brutal with her, but it was true. He wasn't a mind reader and she had already confessed to him that her silence usually meant she was harboring something.

She knew he was right, she had to get over this insecurity of feeling she'll be criticized or dismissed if it's something he doesn't agree with. He wasn't Allan. He was Steve and as she told herself that she also came to the conclusion that in all the time she'd known him he had never said or done anything to hurt her. She did trust him. "I feel guilty for wanting to be with you. It's not because of Allan." She didn't want him to think that she felt guilty over him, "I mean it Steve. I have no feelings for him. I think it's just my situation."

He smiled, one because she opened up and two because he knew the answer to that. "It's your values Carly. You've always been a traditional girl. I love that about you. You're loyal to yourself regardless, which in turn makes you loyal to others. I know it's not about Allan; it's about you needing time to let yourself heal from that. I'm glad you told me. If it's time that you need then I want you to take it." He gently rubbed her back. "When we're together, Carly, I want you to know its right, with no guilt or no regret, and I especially don't want you to do it just for me. Sex between you and I is going to be different for me too," he squeezed her, "because I am in love with you and I've never said that to anyone before. I don't have any guilt over that, and that's exactly how I want you to feel too." He reached up brushing her hair off her shoulder, "When you're in that place you'll know it, and that's when it will happen."

She wanted to cry. It was everything she needed to hear but never dreamt she would. He gave her permission to be herself with no pressure and no time limit. It was all about her. She'd never had that before. She felt the weight of it slide off her shoulders. He really was good to her. She glided her hand down the side of his face, "Thank you for that."

He put an arm under her legs and stood up, holding her. "Lunch?"

She let out a surprised squeal and then wrapped both arms around his neck. "Oh my, I love it when you put those guns to use. Thank you again."

He looked down as he started walking toward the door, "You can thank me by wearing that dress every day."

"You like this? I got it the other day when I was shopping with Jules."

"It's very pretty." They walked out in the hall.

She whispered in his ear, "Do you want to know a secret?"

He stopped, "Is it naughty?"

She smiled at his wicked grin, "Kind of."

"Tell me."

"When I tried on this dress the other day and looked in the mirror, I was thinking about you and if you would like it."

He set her down just before going down the steps, "You bought that for me?" He couldn't hide his pleasure over that piece of information.

"Yes. So I'm really glad you're impressed by it."

He put his hands on her hips. "The dress is very pretty, but it's the woman wearing it that I'm most impressed by." He gave her a kiss on the lips showing his appreciation.

She put her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly, speaking to him as a friend at the moment and not a lover. "I love you."

"I love you too, Carly." His response was in the same tone. "Now can we can please eat!"

* * *

"Oh my God!" Carly practically yelled, pulling her knees up to her chest and scooting closer to Steve on the couch as a clap of thunder shook the house. "It's sounds like it's right over our head."

"Because it is," Craig said. "Look at this lighting out here."

Marissa went up and pulled on his arm, "Come away from the window baby. It's dangerous."

"Nothings going to happen honey," he laughed.

"I don't care. I'm with Carly, it's scary." She snuggled up against him.

He put his arms around her, "I kind of like this whole thunder and lightning thing."

Jules was already sitting on Jack's lap. She wasn't afraid of the storm but was still reeling over what she called 'his ass kicking of Allan.' He went from her husband of twelve years to hero status in her eyes in about ten seconds flat. She just couldn't get over how he jumped in without even hesitating and rescued Carly. It was the sexiest thing he'd done in a long time. She had already dragged him upstairs once for sex after cleaning the wounds on his hand, and could hardly wait until bedtime.

"We could turn the lights out," Jules said, "and have a make out session." No sooner did she get the words out and another clap of thunder shook the windows, and at the same time the lights went out.

"Jules!" Carly yelled, "What did you do?"

Jules sat up, "Nothing!" she laughed, along with everyone else except Carly and Marissa. "That was perfect timing though."

The sun hadn't completely set yet, so the room still had some light.

"We should get a fire going and I think I have some flashlights in the garage." Craig announced. He motioned to Marissa, "Honey help me gather all the decorative candles around the house."

"My stud husband will start a fire." She put her arms around his neck, "caveman."

"I'll get the flashlights," Steve announced, pushing himself off the couch.

"Wait," Carly stood up grabbing his arm, "I'm coming with you." She gripped him tighter as another streak of lighting filled the room. "Here it comes," she moaned, wrapping her arms around him from behind, burying her face in his back as he laughed and tried to walk toward the garage door in the kitchen with her clinging to him.

"You are such a chicken."

"Don't make fun of me," she chuckled at herself, "I've always been afraid of thunder storms."

"I know!" he said over his shoulder. "You and Karen both were. Don't you remember that time you made me come over in the pouring rain because your parents were gone and you two were flipping out."

Carly let go of him as he opened the garage door to use what little sunlight was left. "I forgot about that." She followed him toward Craig's workbench. "You were soaked by the time you got there, but you stayed until my Mom and Dad got home, and then my Dad gave you a ride home didn't he?"

"Yes, that's the first time he and I ever talked. I thought he was so cool."

She leaned against the workbench as he looked through the drawers. "That's when you were dating that one girl, Lori something."

"I was supposed to go to her house that night. She was pissed." He pulled open a drawer and found one. "Here we go." He turned it on to see if it worked. Another clap of thunder roared outside, but neither one noticed too much.

"But you came to rescue Karen and I instead," she smiled tenderly.

He turned the flashlight off, bracing his hands on the workbench on either side of her. "Do you want to know a secret?"

"Is it naughty?" she mimicked him.

"Kind of."

"Then tell me." She was enjoying this game.

He leaned in and whispered it to her, "I only came over that night because of you. When you called and said you needed me," he pulled back so he could see her. "I would have walked ten miles in the rain to get there."

He was full of wonderful surprises. She put a hand on his chest, "Why didn't you ever ask me out?"

He tilted his head, "I did. The Prom."

"So you asked me because you really liked me, not just because I didn't have a date?" His confession made her insides begin to dance with excitement.

"I really wanted to go with you, but I was afraid to ask so I made up that excuse."

"That's why you remembered my dress and the flowers in my hair, because you really did like me." She was seeing their relationship in a whole new light.

He didn't answer but just nodded.

The only thing she felt guilty about at the moment was that she let another man take his place when all along it should have been him. "We missed so much time."

He didn't want to think about what they already missed, he only wanted to focus on what was ahead, and what was happening between them at that moment. He thought about that kiss from earlier and wanted seconds.

He leaned into her as she pulled on his shirt, bringing his lips down to hers. She whimpered softly as he pressed his body into her, making it so much more intimate. She cupped the back of his neck, pulling him in closer as they shifted and he dove into her again. Their tongues danced with each other in the most hypnotic way. He moaned as she took over the motion, clenching a handful of his shirt.

She felt so good that he let the moment get away from him. He gripped her around the waist and lifted her up on the bench, moving between her legs, never once breaking rhythm.

She'd never been kissed like this before. They were in perfect unison as if they had been lovers for years. She wrapped her legs around his waist as his hand moved up her thigh and under her dress. She was practically lying on the workbench when he suddenly broke free from the kiss and rested his head on her shoulder. She could feel his heart pounding along with hers.

He lifted her back up and off the bench, his body still intimately close to her as he smoothed down her dress. "Carly, Carly Carly," he groaned. "I'm not doing very well with that whole resisting temptation thing."

She was still in a daze and still clinging to his shirt, resting her head on his shoulder. "What are we waiting for again?" she panted.

He smiled, gliding his hand down her hair, "You to come to terms with the fact that I'm not here to just lay you back on some table and have my way with you."

She chuckled, "You would never do that." she kissed him on the neck, "unless I asked you too."

He picked up the flashlight and stepped back away from her, "Behave! We are going to follow through with what we talked about upstairs." He pointed a finger at her as she bit her bottom lip and ran her hand down him. "I know that look," he laughed, "you're letting your hormones get the better of you." He stepped back out of her reach.

"Where you going?" she said devilishly. "It's not my hormones that are affecting me. It's you." She followed after him, reaching her hand out for him.

He jumped back laughing as she began to walk faster, "Hey, I'm not that type of guy." He turned and ran for the door as she took off after him.

"Com' on sweetheart," she teased, "don't play hard to get." She caught him as she tried to get in the house, pinning him against the door. She pulled his hand away from the knob, trying to hold it. He turned around and felt weak from laughing so hard at her antics as she crawled up his body, trying to bite his neck.

He tried to block her hands while still holding the flashlight. "This is…" he cracked up, "This is sexual harassment!"

The door suddenly flew open and they both fell on the floor of the kitchen, Steve first with Carly lying on top of him. They looked up at Craig and the others as they stared down at them. Steve held the flashlight up to him. "Here I found this."

Craig pointed toward the ceiling, "You know I have four bedrooms upstairs, there's no need to hide in the garage."

Carly sat up on him. "He was trying to seduce me," she said all innocently, twirling her hair.

"What?!" he grabbed her by the waist, tickling her. "Liar, liar!"

She squirmed off of him trying to get out of his reach. The family room was already lit with candles and a fire that was just beginning to sprout.

Jules jumped back as Carly crawled past her and ran to the couch, jumping on it. She put her hands up in defense, laughing as he came toward her. "I'm sorry!" she begged him, "I won't do it again!" she squealed as he got closer.

He stopped and grinned mischievously, "I see London I see France."

Carly pulled her dress down over her knees as the guys all busted up and Jack gave him a fist bump.

"You are mean boys," Carly snickered.

The room filled with light from the storm and Carly reached up, pulling him down on the couch next to her.

"Oh, I see!" Jack walked away into the kitchen, "You think we'll all just come running when you need us."

Carly looked at Steve and smiled, thinking of his earlier confession. "Only the good ones do."

* * *

The lights came back on before everyone went to bed. The storm had moved on with only an occasional flash of lighting and low rumble of thunder in the distance. Craig and Marissa walked together to the bedroom on the first floor as Steve and Carly followed Jack and Jules upstairs.

Jack closed the door to their room that was three doors down. Steve stood at the entrance to his door, leaning against the frame. "Are you going to sleep?" he asked.

Carly shrugged, "I'm not really tired, but I don't want to stay up downstairs watching TV and keep Craig up. I'm bored."

Steve motioned to his room, "You can hang out with me?"

She raised her eyebrows at him, "Really? Am I safe in here after earlier" She walked past him, looking around at his stuff that was lying out.

"You're shameless. I'm keeping the door open just enough to preserve my precious reputation."

She glanced over her shoulder grinning at him. His room was neat and clean. She picked up a bottle of cologne from the dresser and smelled it, recognizing it as the one he was wearing. "I like this." She smelled it once more before putting it back down.

He sat down on the bed, bracing his hands behind him and just watched her explore. She picked up his wallet and turned around, "How much cash do you have?"

"Why? Are you going to rob me?"

"Maybe."

He shrugged, "Go ahead and look. You can have anything over $125."

She gasped as if all excited and opened it. He had two credit cards and an insurance card. She saw the picture of Gracie again, admiring it for a second and then flipped through the bills. "110, 115, 125," she looked at him rolling her eyes, "126." She pulled out the one-dollar bill and stuck it in her bra. "I'm keeping it." She set it back down and saw another wallet and picked that one up. "What's this? You're little black book?"

He chuckled over that and motioned for her to open it.

She ran her fingers over the shiny gold badge with his name and the Hawaii Five-0 logo. She looked over at him. "Do you take this everywhere?"

"Yes. I have to. Just because I'm off duty doesn't mean I stop being Police Officer."

"Hmm." She looked at it again realizing what it really meant and then carefully closed it and set it back down. "Do you have your gun too?"

He leaned over and opened the nightstand drawer, showing her.

She stepped closer and leaned over glancing inside as if it might bite her.

"Does that make you nervous?"

"Should it?" she asked.

"Well, depends on who's holding it."

"Can I hold it?"

"Why?"

She shrugged, "I've never held a gun before."

He scooted over and pulled it out, releasing the clip letting it fall on the bed and then slid back the barrel catching the bullet in the chamber with his hand as it jumped out of the gun. She was impressed that the whole thing happened in about three seconds flat.

"You're fast."

He smiled, "I've held a gun before." He handed it to her with the barrel pointed down. "It's not loaded so you can't hurt anything."

She took it carefully and held it out in front of her, pointing toward the door. "Can I pull the trigger?"

"Sure."

She did and it clicked, which startled her. She dropped it to her side laughing, "Oh my God, for just a split second I thought a bullet was going to come out."

He reached out with his hand, motioning with his fingers to give it back. "Hand it over Annie Oakley."

She put it in his hand and sat down next to him as he re-loaded it and then put it back in the drawer.

"Do I get to explore around in your room too?" he asked.

"If you want." She glanced around, "It's not as neat and clean as yours."

"Navy habit." He kicked his shoes off and scooted back on the bed, leaning against the headboard.

She crawled over his legs and sat on the other side. "What do you want to talk about?"

He shifted so he could see her. "Tell me what you did after high school, up until you met dickhead, and then stop there."

She mirrored his position and began telling him about her first horrible semester at UCLA.

The storm that passed earlier shifted and began to make its way back again. It had lost some of its steam but they still got a flash of lightning every so often. Two hours later they were now lying on the bed and each one had filled the other in on details of the past sixteen years. Steve had even gone as far as telling her stories about when he was in Navy Intelligence and some of the challenges he faced without having to give up too much classified information. She ventured into she and Allan's relationship briefly after he asked, telling him about the pregnancy and the quickie marriage in Vegas. They also enjoyed some memories of their high school days.

Carly curled up with his pillow and turned toward him, her eyes getting heavy. "Can I stay in here? I don't want to sleep in there alone with the lightning."

"Sure." He was glad she asked because he was dreading her going to her room. He also knew her request was really out of fear and not an innuendo for sex. Which was fine too, after their in-depth conversation it just didn't feel right at the moment. He reached behind him and turned out the bedside lamp and then reached over her and turned out the other one. He settled in next to her still wearing his clothes and she still in the white dress. He slid an arm under her as she moved closer, laying her head on his shoulder. It was comfortable and felt familiar even though besides the hospital when she was medicated, it was the first time they had actually slept together. They both fell asleep in minutes, perfectly content.

Carly opened her eyes and saw a flash of light and then heard a gentle rumble of thunder far off in the distance. She looked up at Steve who breathed softly. She laid her head back down on him and noticed the door open. She was so sleepy she couldn't remember if he closed it or not. Another flash partially lit up the room and she saw a figure standing in the doorway. She sat up and grabbed Steve's arm, screaming out his name, recognizing the figure as Allan.


	11. Chapter 11

Steve bolted up in bed as Carly shook him.

"Steve!" she practically screamed, "I saw Allan!"

The fear in her voice is what woke him up. He leaned over reaching in the nightstand drawer first, "Where?" he asked, flipping the safety off his gun.

"I saw him in the doorway," she shivered, pointing in that direction and still holding his arm with her other hand.

He peeled her hand off and scooted to the front of the bed with his gun pointed at the door. "Stay here," he told her.

He walked to the door in darkness, leaning against the bedroom wall glancing toward the stairs first. He came out of the room and looked down toward the other bedrooms and met Jack's alarmed expression.

"Holy shit!" he stepped back away from the gun pointed at him. "What the hell Steve!"

Steve never flinched, whispering to him, "Carly said she saw Allan in the house. Stay here with her." He made his way down the hall, stopping at the stairs and carefully taking them down, scanning the dark room below. The pointed the gun in his hand, mirroring his eye movement.

Jack watched him as he moved like a pro. He couldn't help but think he looked just like the guys on TV.

Jules came up behind him, fastening her robe. "What's going on?"

He shushed her and took her by the arm into Steve's room, whispering in her ear. "Carly saw Allan in the house."

She gasped putting her hands over her mouth. "Oh my God! Where is he?"

"I don't know. Steve went down with his gun. He said to stay here with her." He motioned to Carly who was kneeling on the bed with her hands over her heart. "Go over there with Carly."

She did as she was told as Jack stood by the door, watching the stairs and glancing in the other direction every couple of seconds.

Jules crawled up on the bed and put her arms around Carly's shivering body.

"I saw him standing in the doorway," she whispered, panting.

"It's ok, if he's here Steve will find him and take care of it." She rubbed her back trying to calm her.

Steve came off the last step and walked backward glancing over his shoulder toward the guest bathroom, sticking his head in for a second making sure it was clear. He thought about Craig and Marissa knowing they were down here by themselves and made his way over to their door, knocking on it and in the meantime making his way over to the kitchen and garage door. The lighting outside lit up the room just enough so he got a good look around not seeing anything unusual.

Craig finally came out, "Hey, what's up?" he didn't see the gun until another flash of lightning. His voice intensified, "What's going on?"

"Carly woke up and saw Allan. Did you hear anything?"

Craig came out, closing the door behind him, not wanting to wake up Marisa. "No! Is he in the house?" He scanned the room and outside.

"I don't think so. Stay here." He made his way to the garage door and went out, searching the area and under the car. He walked over to the side door and saw that it was unlocked. He opened it and stepped out to the side of the house that was gravel for about thirty feet until the forest began. He looked beyond the trees for movement and wondered if he was watching. He closed the door slightly and watched for a couple more minutes before being satisfied and shut it all the way, locking it.

He went back inside and turned the kitchen light on. "Is that side door in the garage always locked?" He asked Craig.

He put his hands up shrugging, "I don't know. I guess. I use it when I take the garbage out, which was the day before yesterday. I might have forgotten to lock it. Why is it open?"

Steve nodded, walking over to the front door making sure it was locked. It was. Craig did the same for the backdoor.

"This one's locked too. Should we call the police?"

"No, it won't do any good. There's really no evidence that he was here, except for Carly."

They both looked toward the stairs as Jack came down. "Did you find anything?"

Steve flipped the safety on his gun. "No." he pointed toward the garage, "The door in the garage was unlocked." He looked around, but I don't see anything out of the ordinary. And if he was here, he was awfully quiet."

They all moved in closer together.

Jack put his hands on his hips. "She said she saw him in the doorway of your room?"

"She woke me up frantic that she saw him."

Craig and Jack looked at each other. Craig spoke up, "Do you really think she saw him?"

Steve huffed, "She saw something. Whether it was a dream or the shadows, she believes she saw it."

Craig looked around, "I've been meaning to get an alarm system in here too."

"Do you think he'd really do something like that, break in here?" Jack asked.

Steve looked at him with a knowing expression, "Everyone has their breaking point. My concern is if he was here, what were his intentions?"

* * *

Allan came running out of the woods and to his car. He climbed in and took off down the road away from Craig's house. 'Holy crap that was close.' He thought. He knew if Steve had got a hold of him he would have been dead meat. He barely made it out of the house, grabbing his shoes by the side door. He made it deep enough into the woods in time to turn and see him come out the door and look right in his direction. He almost wet his pants at that moment, thinking he might have seen him. He knew he'd never be able to out run him. But the shmuck went back inside. 'Some cop he is," he laughed at his getaway. But it was short-lived as the image of Carly in bed with him flashed before him. It had only been hours and there she was. "That fucking whore!" He knew that they had been screwing each other all along. And that bullshit story that they hadn't seen each other in sixteen years. What a joke. And now she wanted a divorce and he was supposed to give her half of everything he worked for so she can spend it with that jerk-off? "Not going to happen." He thought. She'd pay for this. He didn't know how, but she would.

Steve came back upstairs with Jack and Craig to a calmed Carly. She sat on the edge of the bed with Jules as he came in the room. The expression on her face was filled with regret for causing an up roar. But she could have sworn she saw him.

"You didn't see anything did you?"

He put his gun back in the drawer, "No."

She stood up looking and feeling uneasy over what he must think. She nibbled on her thumbnail, a bad habit she used to do when she was in this situation with Allan. She waited for Steve to scold her over the ordeal for being so dramatic. She was even beginning to think she imagined it. "I'm sorry for all that."

He looked at her peculiarly, "Don't be sorry. You were scared. It was your natural reaction. You saw a threat."

She was glad he wasn't mad but she was still embarrassed over the commotion. "But I didn't really see him did I?"

He put his hands on her arms, hearing her try to talk herself out of it. "Are you telling me you made the whole thing up?"

"No! I swear Steve. I saw someone standing at that door."

He rubbed her arms, "I know. I just don't want you to start second guessing yourself. I believe you saw something and it scared you."

His belief in her gave her more confidence. "I was awake and a flash of lightning came through that window and I saw him."

He nodded his acknowledgement over her account of what happened. That and the backdoor being unlocked, he was beginning to think that maybe they had dodged a bullet by her waking up. The real possibility of Allan being there was turning more into a reality rather than the idea that she dreamt it. The thing that bothered him the most was why was he there? Did he come back so he could just talk to her, or did he come back to hurt her. That got him wondering about their relationship and if Allan had ever gotten physically violent with her. He needed to talk to her but wanted to do it alone. "He's gone now. The house is secure." He smiled reassuring her she was safe.

Jack took Jules' hand, "Excitements over, let's go back to bad."

"Good idea," Craig agreed, "although I have to admit I feel a little creepy knowing that guy was in the house." He pointed to the nightstand drawer. "Keep that gun handy officer."

"Yea, but keep it out of my face!" Jack blurted out.

Steve huffed, "I knew it was you before you even saw the gun."

"I know but still, I wet myself a little bit."

"Jack!" Jules exclaimed, "You're ruining that whole hero thing I had going on." She pulled on his hand giving Carly a quick hug. "Don't be afraid. I think you're in good hands."

"Good night everyone. I'm sorry for all this."

They waved her off. Craig closed the door as he walked out.

"You feeling better?" Steve asked her, moving a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Yes", she sighed, holding her hand up like it was on display. "I stopped shaking," she halfheartedly laughed.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"Yes," she touched him on the arm, "you can ask me anything."

He wasn't so sure she would consider what he wanted to know 'anything.' It was important to him though whether Allan had ever physically hurt her.

"The entire time you and Allan were together…" he hesitated not sure what her reaction to his overly personal question was going to be, "did he ever hit you, Carly?"

She didn't have to answer for him to know that he had. Her body tensed up as she clenched her hands in a fist up to her mouth. First he saw the tears well in her eyes and then he saw the shameful expression on her face before she bent her head. It upset him that she would feel shame over something like that but it also infuriated him that Allan had done it to her. He thought it was a good thing he was finding this out now rather than knowing it earlier. Instead of smashing his head into the hood of the car it might have been a tree in its place.

He put his arms around her, laying her head on his shoulder. He turned his face toward her speaking softly, "I'm sorry."

She didn't want to cry but she couldn't stop it either. She had never wanted anyone to know about it. It was too humiliating, but when he asked she knew she couldn't lie to him, she just couldn't. "It happened twice," she whimpered. "I told him I would leave him if he ever did it again."

"What did he do?"

She leaned back so she could see him, wiping the tears with her fingers. "He put my arm behind my back once and shoved me into a wall, pinning me there, screaming at me."

Steve winced just over the thought of that happening to her.

"Then another time he was drunk and he slapped me," she let out a deep sigh, "twice."

He hid the anger in his voice not wanting her to think he was angry with her for any reason, "When was the last time it happened?"

"A couple of years ago. He never touched me again, but there were a few times when I thought he would." She wiped her hand over fresh tears and sniffed. "I told you my life was a mess."

"He was a mess, not you. He just dragged you into it."

He put an arm around her and walked her into his bathroom. He turned the hot water on and she watched him adjust the cold, making sure it was just right. He wet a washcloth and began to carefully wipe her face off. Starting at her forehead where traces of sweat from the ordeal had been and down over her cheek on both sides. She wasn't wearing any makeup so he rinsed it once more in the warm water, holding it up. "Close your eyes."

She did and he gently ran the towel over her puffy eyes. When he finished and she opened them he was looking right at her, with that perfect smile that told her everything was going to be just fine.

"Better?"

She knew it then that he was going to be her best friend, her confidant. The one she could lean on, knowing he would never falter. She had never believed in the word soul mate, but as she stood there letting him wipe her face clean of all the tears from her past she knew without a doubt he was hers, and at that moment she wanted nothing else in the world but for him to feel this same wonderful emotion that overcame her. New tears formed, but they were from a revelation that this wonderful man really loved her in a way that would sustain her for the rest of her life. He went to reach up with the washcloth again when she stopped him, taking it from his hand and looking into his eyes that always showed nothing but patients and affection for her.

"I love you Steve." It came straight from her heart.

He felt like his body had been hit by lightning. The words were powerful enough, but the way she said it and the look on her face was as if an angel was standing in front him, speaking the gospel that was written just for him. He swore he could see a glow surround her. He knew at that second that he would walk through fire for her if had too. He would do whatever was necessary to keep this person close and in his life. Nothing he could think of was going to be more important. He wouldn't let her go ever again.

"I love you too." He didn't even recognize his own voice, it came from someplace deep down that he'd kept hidden from everyone, but couldn't from her.

She kissed him first this time, knowing she had arrived at that place with him where she was completely guided by her heart and felt no guilt or regret standing in her way. It showed in her kiss. He met her with the same enthusiasm.

He felt this primal side of him suddenly appear, wanting to be with her, but the want quickly became a need and the need turned into a necessity.

Her body was tingling as he led her out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom. It was like a fire ignited inside of her over the anticipation of being with him intimately. He never once broke from the kiss as he laid her down on the floor; not taking the extra three seconds to get to the bed, there was no time.

His mind argued with him to slow down, but his heart continued to peel her clothes off piece by piece until she was naked beneath him. She encouraged him with her kisses as she pulled down on his shorts. He slid an arm underneath her, lifting her body up as he moved from her neck to her throat to her breasts. She arched her back, giving him full access as he fondled her with his tongue and gentle hands, nourishing himself with her body.

"Please," she begged, "please don't make me wait." She felt delirious as he moved back up her body, his lips savoring a path that led straight to her mouth.

He would give her anything she wanted, so with that simple request he obliged her willingly. She pulled down on his shorts the rest of the way with her feet as he slowly spread her legs with his knees.

Carly could feel the heat pouring from him as her hands moved over his back and up into his hair. She could taste it on him, but nothing prepared her for the heat that consumed the both of them as he laid his body on hers.

The second he was inside her, the word 'stop' never re-entered his mind. She possessed him; he was living in the moment at a place he'd never been. The slow movement quickly gained momentum as they found their rhythm that just seemed to happen naturally. There was no awkwardness, only a deeply bedded passion that consumed the both of them.

She felt a freedom she'd never experienced before with her body, only it wasn't something that came from her, it was like a gift from him. He loved her. She could feel it, and it showed in the way he moved. He didn't want to just please himself; he wanted her to feel what he was feeling. It was unbelievable what he was doing to her. She couldn't breathe; every time she would catch her breath he would take it away again. This was happening over and over to the point where she thought she might scream it felt so good.

He extended his arms above her as his eyes moved down her body, watching her. The visual of her was just as enthralling as the actual event. She was so beautiful and so carefree in the way she touched him and moved her body against his, bringing him in closer. Her hands glided down his chest coming to rest on his hips. She arched her back just slightly, "Oh God Steve," she whimpered, breathless once again. She looked up at him as he brought himself slowly down on her, until they were face to face.

His lips brushed over hers, and she breathed him in just like she did that day in the grass. He became her lifeline once again. He stopped moving and just stared at her, seeing his future lying beneath him. His heart was pounding. His hand moved into her hair, holding her steady as if wanting her to really hear him, "I've always loved you Carly. I think I've been trying my whole life to get to the place I am right now."

She held tightly onto his shoulders, looking right into him and smiled, "Welcome home baby," she whispered to him, "I've always kept a candle burning for you."

She watched the smile that slowly emerged on his face. She felt his hand slide down her body and up her thigh until he gripped her knee, lifting it as he began to move on her again; all the while he never once took his eyes off of hers.

The position he had her in was completely vulnerable, she couldn't move with him and he knew it as he took control of their lovemaking. She held onto him around his neck, teasing him with her lips and her tongue, which he seemed to enjoy. She played with him, gliding her tongue over his, enticing him and then pulling away. He would return the gesture by lifting slightly and pushing deeper into her with quick strokes until he felt she was close and then slowing again, enjoying the pleasure he was giving her almost as much as how it made him feel. The game went on until she surprised him by giving him what he wanted. The kiss was deep and she controlled it the same as he controlled the heat that was building inside of her as he played his part.

They both felt it fast approaching at the same time. Her kiss was driving him over the edge not realizing that his movement on her is what was giving her the momentum to make it as sexy as it was. Neither one let up until they finally came together.

She broke from the kiss, but still held him close, feeling his hold on her tighten and become more intense. The love they felt for each other became full circle as it consumed her first. The heat intensified as it moved through her body. She whispered his name in short gasps against his lips over and over, informing him of the pleasure he was thoroughly giving her until it hit her full force and she laid her head back, letting it consume her. It was beyond anything she had experienced before. His corresponded moans told her he was feeling everything she was at that very second, which only made it more intense and prolonged her enjoyment.

When it was over he searched out her lips. They lay on the floor entwined around each other. Their lips locked and continuing to play even though they were both exhausted. It felt too good to stop and they had been waiting too long for this moment to even let a second of it go to waste.


	12. Chapter 12

Carly woke up with the sun shining through the window. She could tell right away it was going to be a beautiful day. Nothing outside resembled the storm that blew through the day before. She lay on her back with Steve lying next to her with their leg entwined. His body hugged her as he lay on his stomach with one arm under her pillow and the other over her stomach. He slept with his head resting on her pillow.

The night before had been like a whirlwind to say the least, the whole day for that matter. The only thing she could focus on at the moment was him and how their relationship had changed overnight. They bonded in the most intimate way possible. She bit her bottom lip and actually blushed just thinking of what they had experienced together. They had made love three times over the course of the night and into the morning. Once on the floor, once at the foot of the bed and then once more when they had thought they were too tired and were about to go to sleep. That one was the most intense of all.

She should have been exhausted, but she wasn't, a little sore and stiff in some places, but tired, no. She was wide-awake and ready to start her new life. It was going to be a beautiful day all right, inside and out.

She looked over her shoulder at the man who held her. He was just as perfect sleeping, as he was awake. She smiled, nestling herself closer to him, thinking of her analogy of his lovemaking equaling his kissing talent. She was 100% accurate about that.

She could smell coffee coming from downstairs and felt that morning craving. She went to carefully move away from him when his hold tightened.

She giggled and squirmed feeling his teeth on her ear, gently biting.

"Where do you think you're going?" He pulled her in continuing to molest her with his kisses that moved to her shoulder and neck.

"I was going to get us some coffee."

He stopped and leaned back so he could see her. "Coffee?" He kissed her on the lips, "Ok, but hurry back because I'm not done yet." He dove back into her neck, nibbling on it until she laughed out loud. She wiggled away from him and scooted to the edge of the bed.

She glanced over her shoulder at him, "Can I wear your shirt to my room so I don't have to put my dress back on?"

He laid back with his hands tucked behind his head. "Absolutely." He didn't know what it was, but when she slipped on his shirt it was almost more of a turn on than if she were standing there naked. It fit her like a mini dress.

She lifted up the collar and smelled it, "Mmm," she smiled, "I can smell your cologne. It reminds me of your neck last night." She crawled up on the bed and kissed him. "Cream right?"

He looked at her as she spoke but was caught up in the way she looked. It was different from before. He had always thought she was stunning, but there was a sparkle in her green eyes and a relaxed tone in her voice that mirrored the peaceful expression on her face, he'd never seen her look more beautiful. It started his heart racing as images of their lovemaking from the night before began to entice him. He nodded her answer to the coffee question but reached out for her as she backed away. "Wait, hold on a minute."

He spoke as if he were desperate for her not to go. She crawled back to him on all fours just inches from his face. "Yes," she asked, but already knew exactly what he wanted. It was written all over his face, but not in the typical fashion she was accustom too. He looked upon her as if they were already in the throes of passion and they weren't even touching yet.

She felt her whole body ache for him as she sat up on her knees and pulled his shirt back over her head. She felt his hands start at her thighs and glide up her naked body on either side before she even had it off. She pulled back on the sheets and straddled him, seeing that he was already prepared for her.

"Oh my," she grinned, "is that for me?"

He loved that their playfulness had made its way into the bedroom. "It's because of you." He slid down until he was lying flat, never once taking his eyes away from her. "So please, help yourself."

* * *

Carly came downstairs feeling completely sedated. She ran her hand through her hair, still reeling from their last encounter. Jules was in the kitchen alone and smiled when she saw her.

"Good morning. Exciting night huh?" She turned around grabbing the coffee pot as Carly sat down at the counter.

She smiled at that statement thinking it had a double meaning, but kept the comment to herself. "Two to go please."

"Is Steve still sleeping?" She poured coffee for Carly but before she turned around for another cup, she caught a glimpse of the smile on her face. She stopped and leaned against the counter toward her, "What's with the smile?"

Carly tilted her head pretending like she didn't know what she talking about, but for the life of her she couldn't get the grin off her face that had become stuck there. "What do you mean?"

Jules practically laughed in her face. "Oh my God!" she leaned in closer, whispering, "You and Steve had sex."

"What?! We…" she started to deny it knowing it would be the tactful thing to do, but this was Jules.

"Look at me and tell me you didn't," she harped.

Carly looked over her shoulder to make sure they were alone. She reached over grabbing her hand, her eyes getting brighter, "Oh Jules. You have no idea." She dropped her head on the counter and moaned, glancing back up at her with a sheepish look on her face, "four times already." She dropped her head again giggling.

Jules jumped up and down, clapping. "I knew it!"

Carly sat up motioning for her to be quite, "Shhh. Don't say anything." Her face suddenly took on a concerned look.

"What? What's wrong?" Jules asked, "do you regret it?" she asked in a tone as if she were asking her if she were crazy.

"No!" she quickly put that rumor to bed, "not at all. It's just that…" she set her elbows on the counter and ran both her hands through her hair, "I'm still married and I don't want anyone here to think…"

"Stop right there," Jules said, holding her hand up. "First off, the only thing you are technically married to is a piece of paper. All claims to that relationship were severed when A, he almost tried to drown you, and B, when he tried to choke you; all in one day may I remind you." She reached over taking her hand, "And second, everyone in this house loves you and wants nothing but the best for you. And believe me when I say, the best thing for you is upstairs waiting for coffee." She smiled and reached for another cup, filling it and then pushed Steve's cup toward her. "So run along and don't you for one second let anything come between you two."

She looked at her best friend, so thankful for her. It was almost as good as having Karen. They were as close as sisters could possibly be. "Ok, thanks Jules." She reached over for the milk and poured some in before picking them up and going back upstairs. She glanced over her shoulder before taking the stairs and smiled as Jules motioned for her to go up. What she didn't see once she was out of sight was Jules behind the counter jumping up and down as if her team had just won the Super Bowl.

* * *

Carly pushed the door open with her foot but didn't see him. She came in and heard the shower on in his bathroom.

She set the mugs down on the counter and took off her clothes she had changed into before going downstairs.

The shower was a remodeled walk-in type that had no door or curtain. It was tiled in a dark blue marble style with built-in shelves for soap and shampoo bottles.

She picked the cups back up and walked in just as he was rinsing the shampoo from his hair. The soap ran down his body and she followed it all the way down, admiring every inch of him. She wished she didn't have the cups in her hand, so she could have her hands on him. He was amazing. She couldn't believe how badly that she wanted to make love to him again. He opened his eyes and when he saw her, that same silly grin crossed his face that had been on hers all morning.

"Excuse me Sir," she stepped toward him holding the cup out, "did you order coffee?"

He took it from her, scanning her body with his eyes, "Yes ma'am." He took a drink and set it on the shelf over her head. "Could I also please have some sugar with it?" He put an arm around her waist, kissing her lips.

She chuckled, "That was kind of corny."

"I know," he agreed, taking her cup from her hand and setting next to his.

"But I liked it," she admitted.

"I like you." He pulled her under the warm water and kissed her again, only really kissed her this time.

They fell on the bed with her legs still wrapped tightly around him, while his hands held her from the waist. They started up again the second they hit the soft material, finding that incredible rhythm that sent them both into a mind-blowing frenzy, clutching the other until they both felt the astounding release from what they had been working so hard for.

"Oh God Carly!" He moaned, his arm around her waist trying to pull her closer as he came inside her.

Her fingers dug into his back pulling down on his waist following his movement as it hit her too. It was the best one yet. She couldn't breathe; she couldn't speak except for the erotic sounds that came from inside her as he moved on her, mercilessly pushing deeper and deeper, each thrust was followed by a new sensation that just didn't seem to have an end. She just held onto him as he gave her the single most pleasurable moment of her life.

When it was over, he tried not to collapse on her but was finding it difficult to hold himself up from lack of strength. It had literally drained him. He braced himself on his elbow and rested his head on her shoulder, feeling her heart pounding. The sheets soaked up the water from her hair that was dripping wet. She pulled down on his back bringing him in closer.

He eased himself down on her and moved slightly to the side, still keeping a nice hold on her. She closed her eyes resting her head against his, still trying to recover from it. He did the same as he pulled the blanket over them and they eventually both fell back asleep feeling perfectly content.

* * *

Steve motioned to his plate after Jack put a burger on his bun.

"What?" he asked, "Do you want me to hold it for ya while you eat?"

"No smartass, I want a double."

Jack smiled as he scooped up another burger from the grill. "Been working up an appetite?"

Steve shoved his plate toward him. "Just give me the burger," he chuckled.

He slipped one on top of the other one and looked over at Carly, "Hey Carly, are you going to want two burgers too? Or maybe you would like a foot long dog."

She looked at him oddly and shook her head, "No thanks, I'm having the chicken."

He laughed and looked back at Steve who glared at him and then rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

"What?" he laughed at his own joke. "Just trying to help the poor thing out. She could probably use a couple of extra inches."

Oh yea?" Steve played along, "I've got a license to carry my gun. What about you?"

He huffed, "Don't worry about that. I've got a license!"

"Happy Meal license doesn't count," he grinned, walking away from him.

"Ha, Ha, Ha!" he imitated a stupid laugh on purpose.

Steve sat next to Carly on the picnic bench that was on the deck. She smiled and scooted over for him, eyeing his burger. "That looks so good. Can I have just one bite?"

He slapped the top on it and held it up for her. She took a bite and moaned like it was the best thing she ever tasted.

"Don't do that," he scolded, whispering to her.

She looked at him confused, holding a napkin over her mouth as she chewed. "Do what?"

"Moan like that. It's difficult enough just sitting here next to you let alone you making those noises." He took a bite of his burger and then a swig of his beer.

She put her arm around his waist and laid her head on his shoulder, hugging him, considering that a nice compliment.

He loved having her this close and after the night before, that's exactly where he wanted her to stay. He took another drink of beer and told her so.

"I don't want to you to wander off anywhere without me, ok? After last night, I think it would be a good idea if you stuck close to me." He looked over at her, "Is that alright with you?"

She curled her lip, pretending to pout, "You mean I have to stay by your side all the time?" she groaned, "Oh what a torture that will be." She ended with a teasing smile.

"Keep it up," he warned, holding up his burger, offering her another bite.

"No thank you. And yes, that is ok with me." She ran the back of her hand over the five-o'clock shadow on his cheek. "As if I want to be anywhere else."

They looked at each other longer than usual, both experiencing the same high that only true lovers knew. They were in that place of complete and utter solitude as if only the other existed. He didn't even think about who was watching because he didn't care as he leaned over and kissed her.

* * *

Danny picked his phone up off his desk, looking at the number before her answered. "Danny Williams advice on the fly. How can I help you?"

"Very funny," Steve groaned, "How's it going back at the homestead?" He stood down by the water, looking out over the lake.

"Busy. We caught a case yesterday, jewelry store robbery. Smash and grab. Snagged over hundred grand in diamonds."

"Hmm, any leads yet?" he asked. He was generally interested until he turned around back toward the house and watched Carly as she cleared the dinner dishes off the picnic table. She smiled at him before going back inside. His heart started pumping as if he had just finished a marathon.

"Hello," Danny pulled the phone away to see if he had accidentally hung up, "Hello!"

"What? Sorry. I was looking at something."

"Something? Or someone?" It dawned on him then that after three phone calls this was the first time he had even asked about work. "What did you call for?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well you obviously didn't call to talk to me, so why did you call?"

"You sound hurt Daniel," he smiled, "am I not paying enough attention to you?"

He didn't have time to monkey around today, so he figured he'd get right to the point. "How are things going with the girl?"

Steve turned back away from Carly so he could concentrate on this subject. "Well now that you mention it."

"Ah huh, get on with it. Some of us have cases to solve."

"I need a favor Danny."

He leaned over his desk for a pad of paper. "Yes…" he said as if trying to hurry him up.

"I want you to run a profile on Allan Sumner, residence in San Diego."

"Ok," he wrote down the name. "Who is he?"

Steve rolled his eyes before he said it, knowing it was going to cause backlash. "Carly's husband."

"What?! Are you out of your mind? You're going to run a make on this guy now because you have a crush on his wife?"

Steve pulled the phone away from his ear just slightly, not able to get a word in as he ranted.

"What's gotten into you since you've been over there? I'm starting to think that maybe you shouldn't have gone at all. Leave the poor schmuck alone!"

"Are you done," he asked patiently?"

Danny sat back in his chair shaking his head, "What are you doing this for?"

He wasn't sure how to define what was happening to him, so he figured he'd treat it as a case. He knew how to describe that, "There's been some developments since the last time I talked to you."

"Developments? Please enlighten me on the developments between you, the girl and her husband," he replied sarcastically.

"He was drunk and ran into her Jet Ski. She almost drowned. He was arrested for DUI and then when he got out of jail he assaulted her."

"Jesus," Danny sighed. "He is a piece of work."

"I just need to know a more extensive profile of his background."

"Where is he now? I'm assuming not there and in jail."

"No, we had a nice chat and he left. Carly just wanted him gone."

"You and he had a nice chat?" he huffed, "Did he leave in an ambulance?"

"Almost." He ran his hand over his hair, "I'm just worried about Carly's safety is all."

"All right I'll have Chin look into it. She has a place to stay I hope after she leaves there."

Steve rubbed his hand over the back of his neck, preparing himself for the next wave of backlash. "Actually, it's funny you should mention that."

"Why? What's up?"

"She's coming home with me," he blurted it out and then held his breath.

Danny sighed as he started to get a clear picture of what was going on. Or what he assumed was going on. "And this was all arranged before or after the 'developments'?"

He didn't like the tone of his voice, "After!"

"Really? So the phone conversation we had the other night had no influence over her husband's actions?"

"Why don't you just say what you want to say Danny?"

"I thought I was. In other words, her husband didn't have anything to be jealous about, did he?"

"So that makes what he did to Carly ok? He gets a hair up his ass and he's allowed to go on a rampage?"

"You know I'm not justifying his actions," he snapped, "all I'm asking is, what made him snap? Was it jealously?"

He was silent. He didn't think he had to justify his relationship with Carly to Danny or to anyone else for that matter. He knew what he was doing and he knew what he was feeling and nothing anyone could do or say would change it. "Just run the profile," he answered flatly.

"Well I guess you just answered my question for me."

"No I didn't. And I'm not going to because it's none of your business."

None of my…" he laughed. "You're asking me to run a profile on a guy who's the current husband of your new lover who's coming home to Hawaii with you!" he yelled. "And furthermore; you haven't seen her in sixteen years. Maybe she's the one that put the hair up his ass!"

"Fuck you Danny!" he'd gone too far, insulting Carly sent him beyond bouncing off the walls. "Don't talk about her as if you know her situation by a five minutes phone conversation you and I had! And since when did you become my keeper. I asked you for a favor, that's all! If you think you're too superior in your scruples to do it then just say so and I'll call Chin myself, but don't you ever talk about Carly like that again to me" he was fuming, "or that might be the last conversation you and I ever have."

"Then don't call me for advice if you can't take the good with the bad! Your life as I know it in the last five days has taken a complete 180, all over some girl you haven't seen in sixteen years!"

"Don't try to dissect my relationship with Carly Danny, because whatever scenario you come up with, it's going to be wrong. I didn't fall in love with her over the last five days; it's been there for sixteen years! Stop trying to portray me as some schmuck who's following his dick around. I'm not asking for your advice on Carly or anything else for that matter! Just do the job I asked you to do and stay out of the rest!" He pulled the phone away from his ear and hung it up. He growled and squeezed it, wanting to throw it out in the lake. God he knew how to piss him off sometimes.

Danny stared at his phone. He wasn't thinking about being hung up on, or the scolding he got from Steve or even the threat he put on their friendship. He was still in shock over the word 'love' that he used to defend his relationship with this girl. He'd never even heard that word come out of Steve's mouth in contrast to his life.

Chin came in his office and chuckled at the expression on his face. "You look a little bewildered."

Danny set the phone down and picked up the piece of paper, handing it out to him. "Here, do me a favor and run a profile on this guy."

Chin took it, reading it out loud. "Allan Sumner? Is this a lead in the jewelry heist?"

"No, it's for Steve." He sat back in his chair. "Just go ahead and relay the info directly to him." He thought maybe they should have a cooling down period.

"Does he ever go on a serious vacation?"

Danny chuckled over that statement, "I think this is the most serious vacation he's ever had."

"Alright. I'll get started on it." He turned and walked out.

Danny opened his laptop and logged into the HPD national database and typed in Carly Sumner, wanting his own profile.

* * *

Carly came down the lawn and stopped just before she got to Steve. The conversation he had had on the phone was not a pleasant one, she could tell that from his body language from up on the deck. "Hi."

He turned around and the instant he saw her, the whole stress from his discussion with Danny had vanished. He smiled walking toward her.

"Is everything ok?" she put a hand on his waist, looking up and not seeing the irritation that she thought she would.

He looked at his phone, "Yes, it was just Danny, my partner." He huffed, "He can drive me crazy sometimes." He put his hand on her cheek, knowing without a doubt none of those things Danny said were true, and he also couldn't deny that he loved her enough that if Danny didn't too, it could very well be the end of their friendship.

She saw a look of sadness come over him. "Steve, are you sure you're ok?" she asked again, feeling for him, because whatever it was that was bothering him, she could tell it was painful.

He rubbed his thumb over her cheek, feeling completely content with his decision. Danny was his best friend, but Carly was going to be more to him than that. He knew that as he stood there looking at her. He wanted them both in his life but if he had to choose, he chose her. He just hoped it would never come to that. He wondered if she really knew what he was willing to sacrifice for her, or if she knew how desperately in love with her he had become, and it seemed to be gaining momentum by the hour.

"What?" she gently shook him, needing him to confide in her. "Communication, remember?" she quoted his own words.

He had to trust her and abide by his own guidelines he had given her. If he demanded honesty from her, then how could he possibly deny it when she asked? He was about to jump in with no life vest and only hoped she would save him.

He brushed his thumb over her flawless cheek, "I love you Carly."

She smiled, "I love you too."

He shook his head, "I don't think you understand. This is really difficult for me to stand here and say that. I don't mean that in a bad way, but you should know that I don't need anyone. I've never needed anyone," he sighed, feeling completely exposed to her, "until now. It scares me how much I want to be with you."

She saw that fear in his eyes but it didn't alarm her because she knew he had nothing to fear from their relationship nor from her. It only bothered her that he felt that way. "I'm scared too, but I've never been happier in my life than I have been over the past week. We both need to let our guard down and trust in this." She put her arms around his neck and stood up on her toes so she was eye level with him. "I do love you very much and that alone should put your fears to rest."

He put his arms around her, gathering her long black hair in his hands, slowly running his fingers through it. "I want it too and I'll sacrifice whatever I have to make this happen."

She rested her hands on his shoulder, "Steve, I don't want you to sacrifice anything." She was getting the idea that the heated conversation was about her. "Was that phone call to your partner about me?"

He shook it off as if it were nothing, "I don't want you to worry about that."

She stepped back, "Well I am. What happened?"

"Nothing, he just flies off the handle sometimes and this is really none of his business."

She didn't like the sound of that, knowing for a fact now that it was about her. "You told me he's like your brother. Was that just a phrase or was that the truth?"

That statement made him really think about what it would be like to not have Danny around. Now that he was somewhat calmed, that idea didn't sit well with him, at all. "It's the truth."

"You spend everyday with him at a job where you protect each other and look out for one another, but you're telling me when you leave the office it stops?" she didn't look convinced, "I don't believe that."

He reached out taking her hand, "He just doesn't understand."

"What are his concerns?"

"Carly…" he didn't want to hurt her feelings by going over their conversation, "it'll be alright. He'll come around."

"And what if he doesn't?" The last thing she wanted was to come between them. "It's because I'm married isn't it? Did you tell him I was coming home with you?" she turned away toward the water assuming he had, getting a glimpse of their situation from an outsider looking in, "Oh my God! He must think I'm just some harlot that strapped herself onto you. Bad marriage, crazy husband, go to Hawaii with the good guy and live the good life."

"Hey!" he scolded her, "knock it off!"

"I don't want to break up your friendship with him," she started to panic over what that would mean to him, "I won't come if that's a possibility."

That sent him into a panic, "Just stop!" he grabbed her by both arms, "Listen to me! Danny is like my brother and yes he's concerned over what's happening, but he's also knows me, probably better than anyone else. And once he meets you, he'll see just like I do that this is the best thing that's ever happened to me."

"And what if he doesn't?"

"He will." He pulled her into his arms, "He will."

She wasn't sure if he was trying to convince her, or himself more.

"Besides," Steve released her, smiling at her still concerned expression. "You have two things going for you that he'll fall for. One, you're likable." He kissed her, "very likable. And two, you're playful and have no problem slinging me shit. He'll love that more." He ran his hand down her face, pleased to see the smile emerge, "He'll love you."

She reluctantly nodded, seeing how much he wanted that to happen. It still made her nervous, but there was really nothing she could do about it now. Only time would tell. She didn't blame Danny for his misgivings. He was a cop so his first thought was probably suspicious and given her background his assumption was all he had to go by. The only thing she had to offer him was that she loved his partner, and she hoped that would be enough to win him over, otherwise not only would Steve and Danny's relationship be strained, but she knew it would filter over to she and Steve as well.


	13. Chapter 13

Carly laid her cards out on the table and cheered for herself.

"Read 'em and weep baby," she said to Craig. "Full house!"

"Shit!" He slid the rest of his pot over to her. "I'm out."

Marissa wrapped her arms around his neck. "Poor baby. Now come spend some time with me."

"I can't believe you went all in with a pair of Queens," Jack said.

"I thought I had her." He pushed away from the table, following Marissa.

"You thought wrong buddy," Carly teased, pulling the pot from the middle as well as his remaining chips towards her.

Steve sat on the coffee table in the living room, drinking a beer and sharing a bag of chips with Jules. Carly looked over at him from the dinning room and pointed to her chips excitedly. She had knocked him out of the game earlier and it was just she and Jack left. He lifted his beer to her, giving her a smile and head toss, acknowledging her accomplishment.

He watched her as she dealt the next hand not quite able to turn away just yet. She glanced over at him as she picked up her cards, feeling the same attraction. That's exactly how the day had gone. If they weren't next to each other touching, they were doing it with steady glances that were just as satisfying.

Jules sat on the couch and looked at him and then over at Carly and then back to him. "You two should run upstairs really quick and get it taken care of, and then you'll be good for at least an hour or so."

Steve looked over at her, feeling slightly embarrassed. He glanced over his shoulder to see if Craig had heard her.

"Don't worry, you're in the clear," she assured him, "He went in the other room."

He shook his head, knowing he probably looked ridiculous but he just couldn't keep his eyes off of her.

Jules scooted to the end of the couch, so they were closer. "Don't be embarrassed Steve. Geez! Doesn't it feel good?"

He looked back over at Carly as she did the same until she was pulled away to play her hand.

He carefully looked around again for Craig, seeing the coast was clear. He leaned forward so his elbows were resting on his knees, whispering to her. "I don't know what's wrong with me Jules. I can't stop looking at her. She must think I'm crazy." He leaned in, "Has she said anything to you? Is it annoying her?" It had begun to worry him and knew Jules was the only one in the house he could talk about it with. The guys would have probably thrown him in the lake for being such a pussy. Not that he would have said anything to them anyway. He'd rather be burned alive than ask them that question.

"Oh my God. You're so cute," Jules gushed. "You are so in love and so new to it that you don't even know the signs."

He looked at her queerly, "What?"

She rolled her eyes, "You're such a guy!" She looked back over at Carly who helped her get her point across by staring at him as if right on cue. "Do you notice her looking at you a lot too?"

His eyes moved in that direction as she smiled at him before turning away. "Yes, but that's different. I like it" He felt that un-nerving feeling and looked around again making sure he was still out of earshot. "I swear if I'm next to her, I have to touch her. If I'm in the same room I can't stop looking. If we're in separate rooms…" he sighed as if he felt completely helpless, "I miss her." He leaned in, "That's not normal Jules. That's borderline obsession. I don't want her to think I'm keeping tabs on her," he shook his head adamantly, "because I'm not, but I feel like that's how I'm coming across."

She started to laugh. She couldn't help it. He probably had an IQ that was off the charts but when it came to women and love he was clearly naïve.

He started to get a little irked by her. "Come on, I'm serious. I need help and you're the only one I can talk to about this. So give me a break will ya?"

She put her hand over her mouth, hiding her smile and trying to be more serious because he was clearly struggling with this. "Steve," she bent her head, trying not to laugh again over his innocence. She got control and looked back up at him, "Honey, there is nothing wrong with you. Believe me when I say," she grabbed his wrist, making her point, "she likes it too. She really, really likes it."

He was a little surprised by her answer. "Are you sure, or are you just jerking my chain? Don't mess around Jules. I don't want to screw this up."

She started to laugh again and stood up, putting her arms around him. "You are so awesome!" she kissed his cheek. "You aren't going to screw anything up." She leaned back pointing at him, shaking her finger. "And don't change anything you are doing either. You keep looking, you keep touching and you keep following." She took her finger and made a cross over her chest. "Cross my heart and hope to die. You are doing everything right."

He felt a little better but wanted to laugh in turn at her advice to keep it up, because he felt that even if he tried not to do it, he wouldn't be able to stop anyway. He looked back over at Carly as she gathered her hands around a pile of chips and pulled them toward her. She smiled brightly and then laughed at something Jack said. He glanced over Jules and smiled, "It does feel good."

She stood up and patted his back meaningfully before she walked over to the table feeling a little nostalgic over their talk and put her arms around Jack from behind and kissed him.

He watched the display between the two and how Jack responded by reaching back and acknowledging her with another kiss. He looked across the table to Carly and met her gaze that wasn't just a quick glance like they had been playing with all day. It spoke volumes. He felt the hair on his arms stand up as every nerve in his body reacted. What she could do to him with just a look, it was crippling. She had the ability to level him where he sat. He knew at that second he was done for. If everything Jules said was true then he also knew he was golden in this relationship because all he wanted at that second was to look, touch and follow her wherever she went.

* * *

Carly picked Steve's cell phone up off the picnic table, "Hey, your phone is ringing?"

He looked up from his chokehold on Craig and his knee in Jack's back as they each laid face down in the grass. The two of them had challenged him, stating he couldn't get them both down at the same time before they could get him. It took about ten seconds and now he was holding them in place just for the fun of it.

"Who is it?" he asked.

Carly looked at the name, "Chin?"

He motioned to her. "Answer it. Tell him I'll be right there." He looked down at Jack and Craig, "Had enough yet?"

They both growled and squirmed, not able to move.

Carly answered, "Hello."

Chin pulled the phone away from his ear to make sure he had pushed the right number. "Is this Steve McGarrett's phone?"

"Yes," she stood up walking to the edge of the deck, "he's a little occupied right now and asked me to answer. He'll be here in a minute. This is Carly. Are you the Chin he works with?"

Chin smiled at the pleasant voice on the other end, "Yes I am."

"Oh," she replied, becoming even more interested, "He's told me all about you and Kono and Danny."

"I've heard about you too," he replied. "I understand you are going to become a Kama' aina soon."

She tilted her head, "I beg your pardon?"

"It means native in Hawaiian."

"I like that. Kama' aina. Yes, I guess I will be. I'm so excited to meet you and everyone else."

"We're anxious to meet you too. We're hoping you have some good stories to tell us about the boss when he was young." He didn't understand what Danny's apprehension was about this girl. She seemed nice enough.

Carly laughed, "Yes I do! He really hasn't changed all that much."

"Was he as tough and serious back then as he is now?"

Carly smiled over at him as he released Jack and Craig. She knew all those qualities in him existed but the only time she saw the serious and tough side was when he was searching the house and when he removed Allan from it. She couldn't imagine him being that way all the time. "No. He was very sweet."

Chin laughed over her description of him. "Sweet? Steve McGarrett, sweet?"

"There was one time when he and I were walking home from his football practice and we came upon a bird's nest that had fallen out of a tree. One of the baby bird's had died, and there was one that was just lying there but had survived. We left him, knowing we couldn't touch it." Steve came up on the deck and reached for the phone.

"Don't tell him that story."

Carly moved away from him. "Steve felt so bad about that little bird lying there that he went back that night and got it. He took care of it for about a week, but it eventually died." She smiled at him as he stood there with his arms crossed, knowing she had just opened up the door to harassment that was going to haunt him for a long time.

Chin was on the other end enjoying every second of that story. "What did he do with the little birdy after it was dead? Funeral maybe?" He couldn't wait to relay it on to Kono and Danny.

"I don't remember." She looked at him, "What did you do with that little bird after he died?"

Steve shook his head, hearing Chin laugh on the other end. "I fed it to a cat."

"Steve!" Jules and Carly both yelled.

"That's horrible!" Carly scolded, half laughing at his attempt to save his manhood. "You did not!"

He reached for the phone, "Say goodbye to Chin."

"Goodbye Chin. I looked forward to meeting you in person."

"It was a pleasure speaking with you Carly and I'm also looking forward to meeting you. Aloha." He liked her already.

She smiled brightly handing Steve the phone. "Here you go."

She yelped as he smacked her on the butt as she walked by him.

"Hey," he said into the phone, "you repeat that story and you'll pay for it."

"It'll be worth it," Chin laughed. "I like her! She's got your number that's for sure."

He didn't agree with him vocally but knew he was 100% right about that.

"I got that profile you asked for. I wanted to let you know that I emailed it to your Five 0 account, just incase it had some security issues attached to it. "

He was glad to hear from Chin, but it was a little unnerving that Danny hadn't called himself. "Thanks Chin. I appreciate that. What did you find out?"

Chin relayed a synopsis of the report, informing him of the charges that were filed over Carly's pregnancy issue but were later dismissed. There was also a DUI from three years earlier and an arrest when he was in college over a bar fight. Other than that he was pretty clean. Steve wasn't sure what he was looking for anyway, but after the incident in the house the night before last, he wanted to know if he had a violent criminal past that maybe Carly didn't know about. Much to his relief he didn't. It made him feel less concerned, but he still kept his guard up, knowing the threat could still be lingering, especially after the late night visit. His gut told him to stay alert, and he always followed his instincts.

"So Carly?" Chin asked curiously, "she's seems like she knows you pretty well."

"We go way back." He looked at her as she leaned against the deck railing, smiling at him.

"So I gather. I'm looking forward to meeting her and getting some more stories out of her."

He returned his attention to the phone. "I'm going to have a conversation with her about that, so don't expect my biography of adolescents."

Chin quietly laughed, "To tell you the truth Steve, she didn't seem to be the least bit intimidated by you."

Steve couldn't help but chuckle over his initial description of Carly. "Jesus Chin, you are good at your job, because you just nailed her right on the head."

He couldn't get past the sound of his voice that just seemed, relaxed. "Let me know if you need anything else."

"Thanks again. Is Danny around today?"

"Yes. He's in his office. Do you want me to transfer you?"

"No," he replied, "I'll catch him later." After he hung up he stared at his phone hoping things would cool off with Danny before he returned home. Carly was going to be apart of his life. It didn't matter to him the circumstances of how it happened, it was what it was and if Danny couldn't see it that way then to hell with him.

He went over to her, bracing a hand on the railing behind her so they were face to face, trying to look intimidating with a smile on his face, but knowing she didn't feel any of it.

She smiled sheepishly, "Don't be mad. It was a cute story," she defended herself, "besides; I could have told him the one about the time you got in the fist fight over that cat." She smiled as if she had done him a favor.

He raised an eyebrow; "You are very beautiful when you're trying to dig yourself out of a hole. You're lucky you've got that going for ya."

She knew he wasn't mad and put her arms around him, whispering in his ear. "I'm sorry. Why don't we disappear for a while and I'll make it up to you."

That got his attention as well as his forgiveness.

* * *

Chin leaned into Danny's office; "I just got of the phone with Steve. I sent over that profile he asked for."

He nodded his acknowledgment.

"I talked to the girl too. Carly."

"Really?" he asked a little taken back by that. "Why did you talk to her?"

"She answered his phone. Nice girl. Funny."

Danny sat back in his chair. He was beginning to feel guilty over his argument with Steve, especially after seeing the report Chin had put together and the profile he had done on Carly as well, and now after hearing Chin's analogy of her, he felt he might have jumped the gun a bit. It wasn't so much that he felt bad about what he had said; it was the fact that he was wrong and he stepped over the line, even after Steve had warned him.

He blew a breath out between closed lips, "You know," he said to Chin, "I think sometimes I can be over critical of people."

"What? You?" Chin pretended as if he were surprised by that confession, "Nah…you never jump to conclusions and always give people the benefit of the doubt," he said sarcastically.

Danny sighed, knowing he deserved that. "So you had a pretty good first impression of her huh? What's she like?"

"She's got a good sense of humor and seems to have a good rapport with Steve. I don't know what your misgivings are but I don't see it and her ex sounds like a piece of work. She's lucky to be out of that. It's a good thing Steve was there with her when all that went down. It might have been a lot worse. From what you told me, I think this relationship he's got going might be more serious than we think."

Chin didn't know it, but he nailed it right on the head and Danny felt the blow from the hammer. "Yea, I think you're right."

* * *

Steve reached up taking Carly's hand as she climbed down the ladder to the Jet Ski.

"Are you sure you feel ok doing this? We don't have to go?"

She sat behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I'm not afraid with you." She squeezed him, "let's go."

He smiled, pushing away from the dock with his hand and started the engine. He didn't floor it like he had before, but took off at slower speed so as not to scare her incase she was still a little frightened from her earlier crash.

They headed out toward the open water and he turned his head, speaking to her. "Where too?"

"Our waterfall," she replied as if it was obvious.

He turned in that direction.

She set her chin down on his shoulder with her arms clasped together around his waist. She got a whiff of his cologne, which was like an aphrodisiac. She'd already decided that he wasn't allowed to wear any other brand. She was considering stocking up on it. Her lips brushed the side of his neck, making their way up behind his ear as her hands came up clasping over his biceps. She slid them down his arms and then back up again as he drove the Jet Ski.

Having her that close behind him was bad enough but once the flirting started he had no choice but to reciprocate. He let go of the throttle slowing it down to a stop in the middle of the lake. He shifted in his seat to the side so he could get an arm around her and kissed her. She obliged him willingly shifting as well so he had better access. Her only regret was that there was nowhere to lie down.

He released her but gave her two more quick kisses on the lips, "If you keep playing with me like that, we're never going to get there."

She almost fell backward in the water; thankful he was still holding her. "If you don't stop looking so fricking sexy then I'll be forced to keep playing like that." She wasn't sure but she swore she saw him turn red before he kissed her once more and then turned back around.

Steve glided into the cove as Carly slid off the back and pushed it up on shore. She quickly undid her jacket and ran to the pool as he pulled the boat up.

"Hey!" he warned her, "You're not supposed to over exert yourself too much, remember. For at least a couple more days."

She stopped and looked back at him with her hands on her hips, "Really? It's been over a week and you wouldn't call what you and I have been doing, 'over exerting' myself?"

He caught up with her and leaned over, scooping her up in his arms easily, carrying her over to the water.

She laughed at his surprise attack, wrapping her arms around his neck.

He set her down on the shore of the pool below the waterfall. "What you and I do is an exception. At least we're laying down."

She kept her arms around him and grinned mischievously. "Not always."

He slid his hand down her ponytail admiring her as she looked up at him. "No, not always," he agreed. He had lost count how many times they had made love already. Every night was like a blur. He would be sound asleep and wake up with the feel of her hands on him or vise versa. This would go on all night, sometimes three or four times, not including right before they went to bed and then again in the morning and throughout the day. Their limit was endless. He moved his hands under her shirt, wanting to feel her skin. "I'm so glad you're coming home with me."

"Me too. I can't bare the thought of being separated from you, even for a little while."

He understood that feeling all too well, bringing his hands around to the front over her breasts and then down to her stomach and back around. They already knew each others bodies almost as well as their own, enjoying the foreplay and exploring sometimes just as much as the actual event itself. But neither of them could deny that once they joined together it was like they became one person, feeding off the other as if it were life or death, needing that nourishment just to survive.

The others in the house just accepted it as if it had been the norm all along. It seemed just as natural to them that they were together as it was to Steve and Carly. As the week went on they tried to keep their need for each other at bay in front of the others and would sneak off in the middle of the afternoon just to relieve the tension. But it seldom went un-noticed and got to be a running joke between Jack and Craig. They kept a timeline, placing money on the disappearances and whoever was in the fifteen minute window won the bet and the cash that was in the pot.

Carly reached up and kissed him. "I want to make love behind the waterfall."

He smiled at the idea, but shook his head. "There's not enough room. " He looked up, "plus it might be slippery in there now because of the rains."

She sighed her disappointment. "That's why I wanted to come here. That was the day when I knew for the first time that I was falling in love with you."

He squeezed her, "Nostalgic are you?"

"A little, yes," she agreed.

He slid a strand of her hair behind her ear, "Two things I will never deny you. One is sex. The other is anything else," he grinned.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the rocks that led to the path up to the entrance.

He reluctantly followed her, knowing he couldn't resist, but still looking around the area for a secret place they could sneak off to outside instead. But she was determined to fulfill her mission. Once they got to the top he halted her and went in first, the same as before. He looked back before going on.

"I'm serious that if it doesn't look ok you're not going in."

She nodded her agreement.

He let go of her hand and reached up for the branch that he knew was there, stepping inside. It was wetter than before but not bad like he had thought. He went in further to find the spot where they had sat down and remembered telling her about his scars and how he had tried to find her years ago. That day was a turning point for him as well. It was a little over a week before but it seemed like years now compared to how far they had come together.

She saw him come out hoping it was possible. She smiled excitedly when he reached his hand out for her.

"Be careful."

She took it as he slowly led her inside.

They moved to the back and ducked down under the protruding rocks and sat in their spot. He put his arm around her. "See, no room."

She put an arm around his waist and laid her head on his shoulder. "This is nice too."

The water raged over the cliff in front them, sending a gentle mist back toward them. It was cool but not cold, it was comfortable.

"When we were here before, I wanted you to kiss me so bad, but I knew you wouldn't."

He squeezed her, "I wanted to kiss you, and I almost did. It took everything I had not too."

She lifted her head, looking at him. "I'm so happy when I'm with you. I just feel…" She didn't know how to put it into words. It made her emotional just trying to find a description of what he meant to her. "I love you so much, and it just amazes me because I know that I haven't even scratched the surface of how deep this is going to go." She swallowed the lump in her throat, "and I can't wait to find out."

His life was always so hectic, moving at the speed of light it seemed sometimes, but being with her, he didn't want that chaos anymore. She made him realize he was living that way to make up for what was missing. It was this right here. He reached up with the back of his hand and wiped off some of the mist on her cheek, allowing himself the opportunity he didn't even know he wanted so badly until it was staring right at him. His voice was confident and without any hesitation or uncertainty.

"I'm going to marry you someday, Carly."

She nodded, blinded by tears that filled her eyes. "I'm counting on it."

The kissed they sealed it with was more meaningful than any liaison they'd experienced over the last week together. It was as if they were committing to the vow right then and there.


	14. Chapter 14

Carly turned the blow dryer off and ran to her ringing phone on the nightstand. She scooped it up waiting for a return call from her parents. She answered without looking, "Mom!"

She wasn't expecting the voice on the other end.

"Carly." Allan was surprised she had even answered.

Her mood instantly changed as she sat down on the bed, "What do you want Allan?"

"Already with the attitude." His voice was steady but icy. "What happened to you, Carly? You went on that trip and all of a sudden you turned against me. Just like that!" he snapped.

"It wasn't just like that, Allan. It's been coming for a long time. You refuse to see me or hear me. I tried for a long time to pretend like I mattered to you, but I don't. You proved that with your final stunt."

"That's not true."

"Yes it is! As long as I say and do what you want, everything is picture perfect, but the second I need something in return from you…" she sighed, "I'm dismissed as being nagging or demanding."

"Ok, fine. We'll go see that counselor person again if that's what you want." He tried to appease her, having no intention of going, but knew it's what she wanted to hear. It was a game he played in order to get her in a position where he could manipulate her later on.

She almost laughed into the phone. "It's too late Allan."

Those words sent him into a panic. He gripped the bottle of beer in his hand. "I haven't had a drink since that day and the girl, it's over. No more lies, Carly. No more drinking. Come home to the house tomorrow after you land. We can talk about it."

"No Allan."

He paced the room, "Yes! I want you to come home so we can discuss this like adults and not over the phone."

"You mean so you can get me in the room alone with you and try to intimidate me like you always do."

"Don't push me Carly. I'm trying to be reasonable with you."

"As I am with you Allan, but as always you don't hear me. I won't take the abuse anymore."

He gritted his teeth, trying to calm the anger, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have put my hands on you."

"Didn't you mean to say, I shouldn't have put my hands on you, again?"

"Why are you being so difficult?"

"I'm being difficult?" she laughed.

His patience finally reached its point. He was getting nowhere with her. "I'm tired of playing this cat and mouse game with you, Carly. I'll be at the airport tomorrow to pick you up. You'll come back to the house and we'll work this out."

She had no intentions of talking things out with him. "Why did you come back to the house the other night Allan?"

"What are you talking about?"

"See," she huffed, "you're lying already. I saw you."

"I came back to bring you home."

She narrowed her eyes, bewildered by that statement. "What? What did you think I was just going to sneak off in the middle of the night with you after what you did to me?"

"Don't be so dramatic. You were partly to blame for all that! You were trying to make me jealous of Steve from the very first day, so don't try to act like you're innocent in all this."

She closed her eyes wanting to cry. She couldn't believe she had wasted the last seven years of her life with this person. "No Allan, you were jealous of Steve before you even got there. You were jealous of Jack and Craig and Jules. You just couldn't stand that I had friends that were better than you. Because that's how it's always been. You surround yourself with people who you think are beneath you and that makes you feel powerful. You held me down in that hole with you for too long, but you know what I just realized Allan. I'm better than you too, and I'm stronger than you on so many levels. You tried to keep me beneath you, but this last two weeks opened my world back up."

"You better be careful with your words Carly," he threatened.

"Or what Allan?" she shook her head, "There's nothing you can do to me anymore because it's over."

"Don't bet on that, Carly. And it's over when I say it's over. Don't you forget that you still have to come home. To my home! This is my house and everything in it belongs to me and if you want to see any of it again you better change that tone of yours really quick!" his voiced bellowed.

"You know what Allan," she said passively, "keep it. Sell it, throw it away, hell have a fire and burn it. I don't care anymore. I'm with someone now that knows what makes me happy and…" she paused, but didn't care if it hurt him or not, "I love Steve and I'm going to Hawaii with him tomorrow. Nothing else in this world matters to me except for that. So take all my stuff. Take the house, take everything," she stood up as if she were standing her ground, "because there's nothing you can do to hurt me ever again." His silence felt like a huge victory, until he finally spoke.

"I knew you were screwing him. I should have given you enough of that medicine to get rid of you and the baby. I could have killed two birds with one dose."

She was wrong. His words were like a knife in the heart. She feeling a chill spread throughout her whole body. She felt light-headed, reaching down and bracing her hand on the bed before she sat down. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. He had actually done it to her on purpose. He admitted it as if it meant nothing that he had killed their baby. She held the phone in her lap unable to speak to him anymore, not that there was anything else to say. She never wanted to hear his voice or see his face ever again.

* * *

She sat on the bed staring out the window, feeling numb and still reeling over Allan's words that left her empty inside. She had defended him. Held him while he cried fake tears and stood by his side the entire time, never dreaming he was capable of such a heinous thing. She felt sick to her stomach thinking how hard she had tried to talk him into trying for another baby and worse yet how she had stopped taking her pill at one point to just let it happen, but it never did. Thank god, she thought. The guilt over that hit her hard. What kind of horrible father would he have been? It didn't matter that she was an innocent victim; she was the sole protector of that little life, and she had let him slip past her and do the unthinkable. It broke her heart that she had failed as a Mother, the one thing she wanted to be more than anything else. It hurt almost as much as loosing the baby. That pain in her gut returned. That horrible ache that told her something was wrong. She remembered then Allan telling her it was probably just morning sickness. If she wouldn't have listened too him and left for the hospital, maybe it could have been prevented. The guilt returned with a vengeance.

She heard their voices below and went to the window. Steve, Jack and Craig came out of the woods from their run and stopped in the yard. Craig collapsed on the ground, lying on his back. Jack bent over bracing his hands on his knees while Steve stood with his hands on his hips, smiling.

He looked around the yard and down by the dock, not seeing her. He glanced at the house and then up to the window. There she stood, and right on cue he felt his adrenalin kick in. He smiled up at her but detected right away her unhappiness as if it had become a sixth sense to him. The need to get to her was just as urgent as ever, if not more.

The second she saw him she felt tears flood her eyes. She braced her hand on the window wishing she could just fall through and land in his arms, knowing it was the safest and most comforting place she could think of.

He ran up on the deck and met Jules and Marisa as they were coming out with three glasses of water. Marissa reached one out to him but he declined.

"Did something happen while we were gone?"

The two women looked at each other. "No," Jules replied. "Why?"

"Nothing." He went past them heading for the stairs, taking them two at a time.

She wiped her fingers over her eyes and didn't see him anymore but heard footsteps on the stairs and just knew it was him. She took a deep breath to calm herself and then quickly tried to clean the rest of the tears off, but the second he entered the room and approached her, the floodgates opened and she just couldn't control it.

He came in the room not sure what to expect but the second he saw her he knew his instincts were correct. She tried to force a small smile for him but it was short-lived as her hands went to her face and the most heart wrenching sound he'd ever heard came from her.

She wrapped her arms around his body, clutching his wet T-shirt. She could feel his hands gliding down her hair over and over, trying to comfort her. "Carly, are you hurt?" he asked, fearfully.

She shook her head against him, crying softly.

He glanced around the room trying to get a clue on why she was so upset, but saw nothing out of the ordinary. He didn't rush her or demand an explanation. He just held her close sensing this was more important at the moment.

He sat her down on the floor under the window, keeping an arm around her as she laid her head on his shoulder. He reached over to the chair and pulled on one of his shirts. He used it to wipe her eyes and then her nose.

"Steve?" she finally began, sniffling.

He kissed her on the hair, relieved that she was settling down. "Yes."

"Do you like kids? I mean," she sniffed still trying to fight off another wave of sadness, "I know you like to be with Gracie, Danny's daughter." She used his shirt to wipe her nose again. "But do you want kids of your own someday?"

He still had no idea what it was that had got her all upset and now this had come from complete left field, blindsiding him. He wanted her, but hadn't quite got to the part about wanting kids just yet. He hadn't expected this discussion so soon, wondering what brought it on to begin with. "What happened Carly?"

She didn't answer him. She didn't know how to say it. It would have been easy if he just said no. She loved him enough and was scared enough that she thought she just might be able to live with that.

The detective side of him kicked in and he started to piece things together and then all at once it hit him. He leaned forward so he could see her. "Carly?" She didn't look up at him. "Carly," he said nervously, "are you pregnant?" He held his breath, knowing that it wouldn't be his and the thought of that scared him to death.

That got her to look up. "No!" She saw the look on his face and got the answer to her question.

"Are you sure? You would tell me right…if you were?"

She nodded and went to stand up when he held her arm, pulling her back down.

"Will you just wait for a minute? What's wrong?"

"I think it's good that you don't want kids because I don't know if I can have them." She felt those damn relentless tears coming again but held them back.

He ran his hand over his sweaty hair, completely baffled. "What are you talking about?" he shifted so he could see her, "When did I say I didn't want kids?"

"Just now," she in turned looked at him in the same way. "I saw the look on your face and heard it in your voice."

"Jesus Carly," he pushed up off the floor. "What the hell is going on?" He walked away from her, running his hand over his hair again.

"Don't yell at me."

"I'm not yelling!" He yelled back and then put his hands up, taking a deep breath. "I come in here and you're standing there crying. Out of the blue you ask me if I want kids, and then don't even give me a chance to answer. You just start filling in the blanks for me. We're leaving tomorrow and all of a sudden it's like you're testing me."

She shook her head, still sitting on the floor. "I'm not testing you."

"Then what is it?" He felt both confused and frustrated with her

She looked down at the shirt in her hands, twisting it over and over. She started to get flustered, not sure what to say to him. She didn't want to make him angrier and didn't want to tell him about Allan now either. She was falling back into the same hole she would allow herself to go when she felt a confrontation coming on. Instead of talking she got quiet.

He blew out a breath, feeling like he was getting nowhere with her. "The silence is hard to talk to Carly."

She went to look up at him but put her head back down.

"I can't drag things out of you. I'll listen, but you have to talk to me."

Her heart was pounding a million miles a second. Even if she wanted to say something she was pretty sure nothing coherent would come out. She was angry with herself for allowing this weak side to take control of her and she hated Allan even more for encouraging it until she became this person sitting on the floor, afraid to open her mouth.

Steve sighed, squatting down in front of her, "I'm going to go take a shower. I'll be around when you're ready." He paused another couple of seconds hoping he wouldn't have to wait, but she declined his offer. He stood up and walked out of the room.

She watched him leave, feeling both relieved and angry with her herself for letting him walk away. '_Don't blow this Carly_,' she thought, '_don't let Allan win_.'

She pushed herself up off the floor, hearing her cell phone ring. She slowly walked toward it, almost afraid to look at it. She saw the word 'Mom' and picked it up, holding it until it went to voice mail. She had been so excited to tell her parents about she and Steve, but that excitement was gone now.

* * *

Steve walked toward his room when he ran into Marissa carrying a load of towels down the hallway.

"I heard yelling. Is everything ok?" she asked.

"We weren't yelling," he said as if it were any of her business.

"I didn't hear 'we'," she snapped back, "I heard you!"

He tilted his head, getting even more annoyed by her. "Were you eavesdropping on us?" He wasn't sure if it was her or Carly that was frustrating him the most at the moment.

She rolled her eyes, "No, I was putting away towels and the door was open. You were advertising it." She opened the hall closet, "My Dad was a Marine. He yelled at my Mom a lot. He was impatient too." She set the pile of towels on the shelf. "I also came from a bad relationship before I met Craig. Yelling can be very intimidating even when you don't mean it to be." She closed the closet and looked at him. "It can make you shut down."

She had probably said two words to him the entire week, to anyone one of them for that matter, and now here she was giving him advice. "Carly knows that I would never hurt her Marissa."

"I know, but when you come from something like she did, it's hard to trust again, no matter how bad you want it, it's still very hard to get there."

"Thanks for the advice but I think I know what I'm doing."

She huffed, "Oh yea, I forgot," she looked up at him as if he was partly to blame. "We're not all as perfect as Marines. Civilians have to work at it."

He went to correct her for labeling him in the wrong branch of the armed forces but just let it go, shaking his head at her.

"I'm not trying to interfere in your relationship with Carly. I'm just trying to tell you what I see."

"Really, and you got all that from what you just heard?"

She turned and walked away. "Never mind, you're right," she said sarcastically, "Carly seems so happy right now. What do I know anyway? Dumb blond, right?"

He stared at her as she walked off. Her sarcasm pissed him off but after his conversation with Jules earlier in the week, he had to admit that maybe Marissa had a point and knew something he didn't. She was a woman after all and lately his head was either spinning because of the one he was in love with or he felt like he was being slapped up side the head by the other two in the house. Why should this encounter be any different?

He looked over toward Carly's room and thought that maybe his way wasn't the best way to go. He hated what he was about to do, but suddenly felt it was his best option.

"Hey, hold on."

She was almost down the stairs and stopped, slowly turning around, dripping with sarcasm. "Yes."

He came down, standing two steps away. "What a…" he sighed heavily. "What do you think I should do? I mean, if you were Carly in this position. What would you want from me?"

She crossed her arms; "Don't raise your voice at her anymore. That's for sure."

He shook his head, "I won't."

"At least not until she knows there really isn't going to be any kind of slap or harsh punishment following it."

"I would never do…"

"Yes, I know you wouldn't," she interrupted him. "And she probably believes you but whether you like it or not it's in the back of her mind. Look at it this way. She probably never thought the other guy was capable of it either."

That simple statement was profound to him. At one point she loved Allan and trusted him too. It really pissed him off that he had to pay for that prick's fucked up head. He ran his hands down his face. "Patience right?"

She nodded. "And don't push..."

"Hey," he defended, "I don't push…"

"Are you going to listen or argue over every word I say?"

He held his hands up, "Sorry," and then motioned for her to continue.

"I was going to say. Don't push her because that can just make her even more flustered."

He nodded like he knew exactly what was expected of him. "More patience right?"

"You're a quick leaner."

He had to admit it was good advice. He stood waiting for more as she stared at him, her expression becoming confused.

"What?" he asked.

"Why are you still standing here?" She said it as if the quick learner compliment she had just given him flew right out the window.

"Should I go back to her right now?"

Marissa threw her arms up in the air. "Oh my God. Yes!" She shook her head, sighing loudly. "I don't know how you ever made it as a Marine."

Steve glared at her, "Navy! I was in the Navy!"

She rolled her eyes, "Same thing." She turned and headed down the stairs leaving him speechless.

He pretended to growl at her behind her back, thinking that Craig deserved a medal for the patients he must have for her. But he couldn't deny that she gave him stellar advice, for that he was deeply appreciative of her.

* * *

Carly sat on the bed still holding the phone and the T-shirt. She looked over when she saw him come in. He didn't say anything right away, but acknowledged her with a gentle smile.

She blinked a couple of times, not sure of his demeanor.

He kept the same relaxed grin on his face. "When I was out running I saw this really pretty spot on the lake. I was thinking I'd like to take you there and show you." He held his hand out to her.

She stared up at the tender look in his eyes. Gone too was the irritated sound in his voice. She nodded still a little bewildered by him. "Ok," she replied quietly, setting down the items in her lap on the bed. She took his hand and followed him out of the room.

They came out the backdoor and met the other four sitting on the loungers. Steve focused on Marissa, giving her a smile of appreciation as he squeezed Carly's hand.

"We'll be back in a little while," he said to them.

"Going on a nature walk?" Jack teased.

Carly looked over her shoulder smiling, "He wants to show me something."

"Yea I bet he does!" Craig laughed.

Marissa reached over smacking him softly on the leg. "Let them be. He's making amends."

He looked over at her surprised as if she knew something he didn't. "Amends? They've been like rabbits all week when would they have time to fight."

She sat back putting her dark sunglasses on. "Not a fight, just a misunderstanding. Steve and I talked and he knows what to do now." She closed her eyes unaware of the sudden surprised glances between the other three.

Carly looked down at his hand as they walked. He'd touched her on just about every spot on her body, but there was something about the way he held her hand that really felt satisfying. Their fingers clasped around each other and she followed slightly behind him down the path by the lake.

She didn't know how far they were going but hoped it wasn't too close. She liked the feel of this.

They came around a bend and the lake opened up with the mountains in the background reflecting off the smooth surface of the water. There wasn't a single boat on the lake and everything was silent except for the gentle lapping of the waves on the shore.

He stopped, facing the view and looked back at her. "What do you think?"

She stood next to him admiring the same vision that almost looked unreal it was so beautiful. "Thank you for bringing me here."

He smiled over at her. "You're welcome."

"And I don't mean just for the view. Thank you for coming back for me."

He turned and faced her, "I'm sorry I yelled at you."

She kissed him letting him know it was forgotten. She put a hand on his chest, "I'm sorry too."

"I shouldn't have pushed you." He put his hands on her arms, caressing them, "I know better now."

"I just got flustered and…"

"It's ok. I understand. I do." He put his arms around her. "You take all the time you need Carly. I'm not going anywhere, and I'll never walk out on you again. I promise." He leaned back so he could see her. "And for the record. I do want kids. I want kids with you. I think you'd be an incredible mother."

She didn't know what had happened in those few moments when he left the room but he came back suddenly knowing exactly what she needed to hear. "I have to tell you something."

He nodded as if letting her know she had his full attention.

"I had a really bad miscarriage about six years ago and I'm not sure if I can get pregnant again."

"Did the doctors tell you that?" Already knowing all about it.

"No, but at one point I stopped taking the pill for about six months and it never happened. I'm glad now that it didn't but still." She didn't want to tell him about Allan's confession just yet. "So I'm afraid it might not happen and if you want children then maybe we should discuss that before we leave tomorrow."

He lifted her chin up so he could see her face. "Thank you for being honest with me about this." His hand moved around her neck and he stepped closer to her. "Now I'm going to be honest with you. I love you. I want to be with you. If children are in our future then we'll make it happen one way or another. I'm not going to let that come between us." He kissed her and then smiled devilishly, "Besides, Allan's boys are nothing compared to mine. I'll get you pregnant, or we'll die happy trying."

She started to laugh and hugged him. "I love you."

He felt the mood lighten. "Ok, so we've got all the relationship bases covered now right?" He used his fingers to count each one off. "Love, Marriage, Kids, communication and our first fight. Am I missing anything?"

She put her arms around his neck, "You missed the best one. Sex."

He shook his head, "Oh no, that was never an issue that needed to be discussed. I think we do pretty damn good in that department."

"I read that in Hawaii the smell of the flowers alone is like an aphrodisiac."

"That's true, but I really don't think we're going to need any outside stimulants to get our fire going. Just the thought of you in my bed is an aphrodisiac."

She wanted to tell him about Allan but decided to wait. He was her past now, and Steve was her future. His threats meant nothing to her. She felt confident that she was out of his reach forever. "I can't wait to get there tomorrow."

"Me too." He hugged her tightly, "me too." He hadn't been this excited about anything in a long time. It was like a new chapter in life that he wasn't sure would ever be written, but here he was. Life in paradise was going to take on a whole new meaning.


	15. Chapter 15

All six of them stood out front by the cars. Steve closed the trunk of Carly's car and went up to Craig first.

"Thanks Buddy."

The two men hugged each other.

"I'm glad you came, Steve."

They released and Steve took Craig's hand shaking it, with his other one on his shoulder, "I want to see you in Hawaii, soon."

Craig nodded, "You got it. I'm serious too."

"Good! So am I."

Carly hugged Craig next thanking him with a kiss as Steve moved on to Marissa giving her a warm hug. "Thanks for your help yesterday."

"You're welcome," she replied. "Sorry I called you a Marine."

He chuckled at her. "It's ok. I hope you'll visit with Craig."

"I will!" she said excitedly. "I've never been to Hawaii."

"You'll love it. Beach and sun. It's a blond's heaven." He winked at her and got a smirk with rolling eyes in return.

Jack came up to Steve and they gave each other a hug as well.

"Let's not go another sixteen years, huh?" Jack said, slapping him on the back.

"Agreed," Steve replied.

Jack looked over at Carly who was talking to Jules. "I'm happy for you man. It's a long time coming, but I think we all knew even back then that you two would end up together. I know you'll take good care of her."

He nodded, "I will."

Jules hugged Carly, wiping the tears from their eyes.

"I'm going to miss you," Jules sniffed.

"Let's keep in touch on a weekly basis, ok?" Carly suggested.

Jules nodded enthusiastically, "Yes. I want that too." She smiled at her then. "I'm so happy for you Carly. I think this trip has been a blessing for you in so many ways."

"I've never been so incredibly happy in my entire life," she glowed. "It feels so good, Jules. I love him so much."

"It shows all over you. He'll take good care of you. You'll have a nice life with him."

"Like you and Jack," she proclaimed. "I've always envied your relationship, and now I feel like I'm there."

"You are." She hugged her once more. "We really did well for ourselves, didn't we?"

"Yes we did," Carly agreed. "It just took me a little longer."

"Don't take any shit off Allan," Jules said sternly, "You know he'll pressure you. Stand your ground."

Carly nodded, thinking of her conversation the day before with him. "I won't." She had no feelings for him whatsoever. That life was behind her and that's exactly where she wanted to leave it.

Carly went over to Jack as Steve approached Jules. He picked her up in a bear hug, kissing her cheek. "You're an amazing woman Jules. Jack's a lucky man." He squeezed her once more before setting her down.

"I feel the same way about you and Carly." Her eyes misted over as she looked up at him. "I'm not going to tell you to be good to her, because I know you will be. But I do want to say thank you. I have been so worried about her for so long." Her expression turned serious. "I know she tried so hard to hide it, but she was afraid of him and I think she had good reason to be. These last couple of years I really feared for her, but now," her beautiful smile returned, "I can rest easy because I know she's in good hands. She needs to be with you and you need her. I believe in destiny and I believe you two coming together these past two weeks was destiny long overdue."

Steve blew out a breath, "Geez Jules what are you doing to me?" he hugged her again as she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. "You get your kids and that bum husband of yours to take you on a trip to Hawaii. Free room and board."

She nodded feeling the tears come again.

Steve and Carly were the first to depart. As they drove off Steve gave a Hawaiian hang ten out the window as Carly waved.

She sat back in her seat, looking over at him. "Any second thoughts?"

"Only that I wish I would have made sure the house was cleaner before I left." He grinned at her, "I didn't know I'd be bringing a girl home."

She leaned over and kissed him and then sat back giving him an inquiring look. "Speaking of girls. I'm not going to find a strange girl in your bed waiting for you am I, or one knocking on your door at one in morning?"

"Oh shit!" He put his hand over his mouth. "I forgot to tell you about Megan."

Carly's expression was half amused and half worried. "Megan?"

He looked over at her sheepishly as he drove. "Yes. She shows up sometimes just before I go to bed. I feel bad so I let her in."

"Steve!" she laughed, "Are you serious?"

"I can't just leave her outside all night or she cries."

"What?" She looked back over at him and he was smiling over at her in that teasing way. She tilted her head, glaring at him. "Ok, I know I'm gullible and all but who's Megan?"

"I live next door to a church and they kind of adopted this cat. Somehow she ends up at my house at least a couple of times a month. I think she gets locked out and needs food."

"So you feed and take care of her?" Her voice was overly sweet. "Look at you. You're such a good guy. Sometimes I think you missed your calling. You should have been a Vet."

"I don't really take care of her. I just feed her and give a place to sleep. It's actually a pain in the ass because I have to keep cat food stocked now."

"Uh huh," she teased. "You love it and you know it. I bet when it's raining you even look outside to see if she's there."

He looked over at her and then pretended like he was concentrating on driving. "No I don't." But truth was, he had actually done that before.

"Yes you do." She leaned over kissing his ear.

"You keep that up and we're going to miss our flight."

"A six-hour flight across the ocean. You do realize that I don't think we've gone six hours without having sex since our first time."

He smiled over at her exaggeration but agreed with the logistics of it. "There's always the mile high club."

* * *

They made it to San Francisco barely an hour before their flight left. They dropped the car in short-term parking and texted Jack the space number. He had volunteered to drive it down to his and Jules house in LA and keep it for her.

After getting to the gate just minutes before boarding Steve stepped aside and called Danny.

"I'll be right back," he told Carly.

He hadn't spoken to him since the argument they had had several days earlier. They needed a ride home from the airport and he figured this would be the perfect opportunity to kind of break the ice. He answered right away.

"Hey," Danny said, sitting in his car waiting for Gracie, "I used to know a guy name Steve with this same number, not sure what happened to him, but my nuts still hurt from the last time I talked to him." He smiled at his own joke.

"If you weren't such an obnoxious little shit I wouldn't have to bust your balls all the time." He grinned, glad that things had settled.

"Yea, yea, what do you want?"

"We need a ride home from the airport tonight."

"Tonight?!" he groaned. "What time tonight?"

"We get in at eight thirty. Flight 984 from San Francisco."

He sighed heavily into the phone as if it were a bother, but didn't consider it a burden at all. He was not only anxious to get Steve back to work so the load he'd been carrying was finally lifted but he was also curious to meet this Carly he'd heard so much about. He still wasn't quite clear on the details of their relationship or for how long she'd be staying. It was the first woman he'd ever known Steve to be serious about so his curiosity was off the charts. "Ok, I'll be there."

"You better stop and get my truck. I don't think our luggage will fit in the Camaro."

"Anything else," he whined, "perhaps you'd like me to straighten up your house for you while I'm at it."

Steve laughed, "Now that you mention it. Would you mind cleaning the bathrooms for me?"

"Sure, right after I bend over so you can kiss my ass."

They both laughed at that.

"Flight 984 from San Fran." Danny repeated, "bring truck. Ok, got it. I'll see you and the new house guest tonight."

"Thanks Danno."

"Yea, yea, have a good flight."

They hung up and Steve let out a breath of relief, glad he had come around, not sure why, but he didn't care. He looked over at Carly sitting in the chairs. He imagined if he was a stranger, seeing her for the first time. His heart leapt, knowing he would have gone out of his way to meet her. The attraction was just too strong.

He sat next to her slipping his phone back in his pocket. She held the ticket up to him. "These are first class seats!" she announced, surprised.

"I know," Steve answered, unimpressed.

She leaned over to him, "These must have cost a fortune. Why did you get first class?"

"I didn't pay for first class, just the ticket." He tapped his pocket where his badge was. "Running a task force for the Governor of Hawaii has its perks."

Carly smiled as if she were impressed. "Wow, what other perks do you get?"

"Well, let me see," he thought. "Free parking on the island. Basically anywhere except in front of a fire hydrant." He huffed, "which you will see that parking is even more of a perk than the first class tickets." His expression showed more pondering, "What else. My trucks paid for."

"Those are some nice perks. I'm sure there are some not so nice perks too."

He huffed again, "Yes. I'm on call twenty-four hours a day and the word salary doesn't include overtime."

"Hmm, do you go in the office everyday, or just when you get a call?"

"Yes, just about everyday. If it's slow, we'll cut out early."

She began to realize there were so many things she needed to learn about him. "What do you do on your days off?"

"Kono and I surf. Danny and I fish. Chin and I like to ride motorcycles. I like to go for a run along some of the trails up in Koolau."

"What's that?" she asked, trying to repeat the Hawaiian word but butchered it.

"It's a beautiful mountain range along the east side of the island. Some of the harder trails go up about two thousand feet."

"And you do that for fun?" she asked, amazed by the idea.

"The view at the top is motivational." He nudged her, "You'll see. You'll love it Carly. Once you get out of Honolulu, which is only about ten minutes, you'll see some of the most incredible scenery in the world. I've hiked some of those trails over a hundred times and I still see things I've never seen before."

The way he described it with so much enthusiasm and interest was enough motivation for her. "I can't believe I've never been there before. I feel like I've been missing out on something special."

He reached over taking her hand, "I'm kind of glad you've never been there and that I get to be the one to show you."

She squeezed it, "Me too." She looked at him apprehensively, biting her bottom lip.

He knew that look already and motioned with his hand for her to get it out. "C'mon."

"My Mom and Dad said they want to come and visit."

He shrugged, "What's wrong with that?"

A smile slowly emerged on her face, "You wouldn't mind?"

"Of course not. Why would I care if they came to see you?"

She looked down, "I don't know, I guess I just thought…" she paused because they had never been welcome at her old house.

"They're welcome anytime," he reassured her.

She smiled up at him, "Thank you. You know my Dad was very excited about this? I thought he was going to be a little apprehensive because, well, technically I am still married, but he wasn't."

"What about your Mom?" Her Dad he wasn't too concerned about, but it was the Mother that he felt he needed the most approval from, regardless of what the tradition was.

"She was a little shocked when I told her, but before I hung up she told me that she could hear something in my voice that she hadn't heard in a long time." She squeezed his hand, "Happiness."

He knew that feeling too, because it had been shadowing him the past two weeks.

* * *

Steve leaned over Carly's seat trying to point out objects to her in the half moonlit sky as they approached Honolulu.

"You see those two islands right there off the coast?"

"Yes," she said, looking down.

"That's the Mokuluas islands and the beach on the coast right there is Lanikai." He looked at her, "That beach is the epitome of a Hawaiian beach. You'll think you died and gone to heaven."

She sighed, "I want to go there."

He sat back, "We will. I'll show it all to you, including the other islands."

She continued to look out the window as they turned and prepared to land. The lights from Waikiki were the brightest and she could see the world famous beach that looked spectacular even at nighttime. She couldn't imagine what it would look like in the daytime.

* * *

They walked side by side down the corridor as they made their way with the other passengers to the baggage claim. As they came to the main complex of the airport it opened up to the outside. There were very few windows and the walkways leading to the gates had no walls and looked down on gardens that were filled with various Hawaiian flowers that naturally brought in the fresh scent that hit Carly.

She stopped and took in a deep breath and smiled. "It smells so…"

"Hawaiian?" Steve tried to finish her sentence, enjoying the familiar scent himself. Glad to be home.

"No, exotic."

"Welcome to paradise." His hand brushed against hers and she naturally took a hold of it.

He looked down, not having held a girl's hand in public for years. He thought it would seem odd but it didn't feel that way at all.

Carly let go, "Sorry. I thought you were trying to hold mine."

"I wasn't but it's ok if you want to."

"You're not comfortable with it are you? I mean in public?"

"I've just never done it."

"You used to hold my hand before."

"We were in high school then."

She nodded her understanding, but hid her disappointment. Allan hated public affection and refused to hold her hand or touch her that way in public. It was hard at first but she got used to it just like she would with Steve. "It's ok; some people just don't like public affection." She continued walking.

He'd never really been one of those people. It's not that he didn't like it; it just never came up. He never criticized couples that did it, he just never saw himself there. He knew Carly wanted it though; it was obvious to him.

He reached out as she was a half a step ahead and took her hand. She looked down at it and then up at him, giving him the most pleasing smile he'd ever seen. That little gesture made her so happy that he decided to break his mold and go one further. He stopped and dropped the carry on bag over his shoulder as the other passengers walked past them. He put an arm around her waist, pulling her up against him. He looked her right in the eyes before he kissed her like he never had before.

Danny stood in front of the escalator that led down to the baggage claim watching the crowd of people walk by. He saw a group part and two people about fifty feet in front of him kissing as if they may never see each other again.

"Jesus," he moaned, "probably newlyweds. Poor schmuck," He looked away and then something caught his eye and he looked back at them. His mouth literally fell open in such way that a guy walking toward him turned around to see what had him so shocked. He didn't see anything out of the ordinary and walked past him. Danny however saw what he would consider in later years as one of the biggest shocks of his life. There in the middle of the Honolulu airport with people actually having to maneuver around them was Steve kissing a woman whom he perceived was Carly. But it wasn't just a kiss; it was a full-blown hand in the hair, arm tightly around the body, make-out kiss.

He released her with two more quick kisses and smiled, bending over and picking the carry on back up, putting it on his shoulder. She hadn't even had time to catch up with him yet because she was still reeling over the moment. It was by far the most romantic moment of her life.

He laughed at her expression; overly pleased with himself. "You ok?"

A smile slowly emerged on her face. She loved him so much that the adrenalin from it that shot through her body was actually on the verge of being slightly painful, yet at the same time it was euphoric. "Yes," she sighed. "But I'm not sure I can walk now," she smiled brighter.

He took her hand, feeling triumphant over the way she enjoyed it. "I told you I would never deny you anything."

She nodded her understanding. "I'm beginning to believe every word of that."

He started walking, pulling her along with him. "Come on pokey. Danny will have a heart attack if I make him wait too long."

They would have walked right by him if he hadn't said something.

"Hey Romeo." Danny put his hand out to Carly, "and you must be Juliet."

Steve stopped abruptly. "Geez Danny I didn't even see you."

He kept his hand out to Carly but looked over at Steve. "I would think not with your head in the clouds and all."

He froze and glanced over at the spot where he and Carly had been kissing. There was nothing to say and he had no chance of defending himself. He'd been caught by the one person in the entire world that would ride this for all its worth. He had no choice but to just go with it and ignore the fact that it had even happened.

Steve motioned to Carly with a proud smile on his face as she took Danny's hand. "Danny, this is Carly. Carly this is my partner, Danny."

Danny looked over at her, really paying attention for the first time. The picture of the pretty girl from sixteen years earlier was nothing compared to the stunning woman that was smiling at him.

"Hi Danny. It's so nice to meet you. Thank you for picking us up. I hope it wasn't too much trouble."

He shook his head as well as her hand, "It's nice to meet you too. It was no trouble at all."

"Steve has told me some really wonderful things about you."

He looked over at him again. "Really? Wonderful things?"

Steve shrugged, "I had to exaggerate some stuff. You know how you are."

Danny let go of her hand, "Ok that makes more sense." He motioned to the escalator down that led to the baggage claim.

Carly went first followed by Steve who was halted when Danny pulled on his arm.

"Ok," he whispered to him, "I get it now." He whistled his approval under his breath.

"The outside appearance is nothing compared to the woman inside." He stepped down on to the escalator, "You'll see."

* * *

Steve set the bags in the back of the truck as Danny opened the passenger door for her.

She smiled sweetly at him, "Thank you Danny."

"Welcome," he said closing it and then getting in the backseat of Steve's four-door truck.

As they pulled out the parking lot Carly turned to the back. "I saw a picture of Gracie. She's beautiful."

That won her about ten thousand points with him. "Thank you."

"Steve said that she's really sweet too. I hope I get to meet her soon."

Another big score. "You will."

Steve looked at him through the rearview mirror. "How did that jewelry case you guys were working pan out?"

"Closed," Danny replied, "The morons tried to fence them to a dealer in Maui."

They both laughed.

"Am I allowed to ask you about your work?" Carly asked, looking at Steve, "Or are you not allowed to talk about it because of legal reasons?"

His first thought was that he liked that she was even taking an initiative about his work and the second that she had the courtesy to ask rather than just assume. He reached over caressing her thigh, "You can ask me anything you want and I'll tell you what I can."

Danny sat in the backseat and heard a voice come out of Steve that was foreign to him. The only word he could use to describe it was gentle. He knew then that he had grossly misjudged his relationship with this girl. He had a strong feeling that she wasn't here for just a visit. "So you two knew each other in high school?"

Carly turned to him, "Yes," she glanced at Steve. "We were very good friends." She got a smile from him.

Danny grinned, "I heard you have some stories you can pass on to the less fortunate about the younger days of the militant Steve McGarrett?"

"Hey," Steve jumped in, looking at Carly and chuckling, "you be nice! I have a tough guy reputation to enforce."

She smiled at Danny and touched Steve on the shoulder, "I have to be loyal to my man." She leaned toward the backseat, putting her hand by her face as if she was trying to block out the sound to Steve and whispered loudly to Danny. "But I get really chatty after a couple glasses of wine."

Danny laughed, reaching up and tapping Steve on the shoulder. "We need to make a stop."

"No!" he bellowed, "I'm not stopping for wine!"

"But I'm thirsty," Carly whined, grinning at Danny.

Steve gave her the stink eye. "Ten minutes," he couldn't hide the fact of how pleased he was that they were already getting along, "you've only known him for ten minutes and you are both already planning my demise." He shrugged, "I can't win. I finally get the girl but I'm going to lose my masculinity in the meantime."

"It goes hand in hand," Danny offered up his belief, "if it wasn't this it would be something else. Just wait until you have to stop on your way home for tampons."

Carly roared with laughter over that one. She leaned over kissing Steve on the cheek. "I promise I won't make you do that, at least not for the first year."

"Thank you," he said submissively, "that's so kind of you."

She and Danny laughed at his obedient character.

* * *

Carly got out and followed Steve up to his house. She ran her hand over Danny's Camaro, "Is this for me to drive?" she said hopeful.

"Hands off the beast," Danny teased, "that's mine." He motioned to Steve, "Although he thinks it's his, because I never get to drive."

"I'm a better driver," Steve defended.

Danny huffed, "It's a control issue, and one day you'll admit that."

He set Carly's suitcase on the floor by the front door as Steve moved ahead and turned the lights on.

The second she walked in she felt a welcoming vibe that just grew by the second. She glanced around the front room, touching the soft brown leather sofa as she followed him in further. He stood in the middle of the room with his arms stretched out.

"Welcome home."

She smiled at him, touching him on the arm as she passed. "I like it." She walked to the kitchen, looking around, "I really like it!"

Danny picked up his keys that were on the side table by the door. "Are you coming in tomorrow?"

Steve didn't hear him; he was too preoccupied by seeing Carly standing in his kitchen. It was surreal to him that she was really here. If he had any misgivings at all about her coming, they vanished the second she touched him. He felt the shift in his life at that very second, always knowing it was coming, but the impact of it hit him just then. It wasn't scary or regretful it felt safe and relieving.

Danny shook his head at him. He was gone, off on some other planet named Carly, with only one inhabitant that was going to turn not only Steve's life upside down but Danny had a pretty good feeling it was going to effect his just as much.

"I'm outta here!" Danny yelled to get his attention.

Steve turned to him. "Ok, thanks buddy for the pick up."

Carly came out of the kitchen standing next to Steve, wrapping her hands around his arm. "Thank you Danny and it was really great to finally meet you."

"You too," he replied backing up with his hand on the doorknob. He couldn't look at them anymore. The two of them standing there next to each other was so sweet he could feel a cavity beginning to form. It was nauseous. They looked perfect together. It was a typical guy reaction, but the best friend inside of him was happy for Steve.

"I'll be in tomorrow morning," Steve announced, finally answering the question he never heard earlier.

"Yea," Danny said, "thanks for reminding me of that. Sleep well." He closed the door behind him

Steve pointed toward the upstairs. "Let me show you the rest of the house." He walked to the stairs pointing to a room off the kitchen. "There's a washer and dryer in there." She followed him up the steps that turned to the left and stopped at the first bedroom. He opened the door and turned the light on.

"I hardly ever use this room."

Carly peeked inside at the boxes and twin bed that had a Hawaiian quilt on it.

He walked down the hall and turned the light on in a bathroom.

"Bathroom one."

He went into his room and switched the light on by the bed. "Our room," he announced, walking around the queen size bed and opening up one of the french doors that led out to the lanai.

Carly smiled at his description of it being their room. She looked at the bed, anticipating getting in it with him. She glanced toward the back of the room at a closet and another bathroom before stepping out on the lanai. He stood by the railing motioning to the back.

"Backyard and ocean."

"Oh Steve," she sighed, getting a look at the view. Even though it was dark she could still see the water and the waves lapping up on the shore. "It's beautiful. I can only imagine how pretty that view is in the morning."

He wrapped his hand around her ponytail and slid it down. "It won't be as pretty as this view in the morning."

She turned to him snuggling her body close. "I love your house."

"I don't want you to think of it as my house. You're not a guest. I want you to feel at home. Nothing is off-limits to you here, Carly," he shook his head, "nothing."

She felt all that the second she walked in but having him say it was like icing on the cake. "Does that go for you too?" She put her hands on his hips moving them around to his back and up, feeling him.

He grinned mischievously as he began to undo the buttons on her blouse, "I don't want you to think of it as my body. Make yourself at home with it. You're not a guest." He slid her top off, laying it over the railing and then reached behind undoing her bra as he kissed her neck. "Nothing is off-limits to you." Her bra fell to the deck. "Nothing."

"Oh my," she sighed, "I do believe," she stopped mid sentence, letting him know by the moan that escaped her lips that his had hit that favorite spot on her neck. She continued on feeling breathless, "I believe…your home…is now perfect," she panted.

His hands made there around to her breasts as his lips slowly made their way to hers. "It's perfect now that you're in it."

She couldn't stand it anymore and hurried him along by meeting him halfway. He pinned her against the railing as they kissed. She found bare skin under his shirt and wanted it touching her. She lifted it over his head and they broke just long enough to make that happen. Their lips were like two magnets, drawn to each other. His kisses alone were enough to drive her mad.

She held tightly to him around his neck as he lifted her around the waist and led her back to the bed, kicking the door closed before he laid her down.

He rested on top of her, pushing his hips down into her over and over, simulating what he was going to do to her. His hand caressed the outside of her thigh and then moved inside as she moaned over his seductive move, knowing very well what was coming next. He felt her body shutter in anticipation of it.

"Please" she begged, pulling down on his hips, "hurry Steve." It was all she could do not to scream it. It had been too long since she'd felt him inside her. She desperately missed him, fumbling with her skirt as the kissing began again. She tried to unzip it but gave up as he gathered it around her waist, moving her thong to the side, giving her what she asked for.

They weren't even fully discarded yet when he plunged inside her, feeling that same urgency. She thrust her body into him, clutching his shoulder with one hand and the sheets of the bed with the other as the heat between them built faster and quicker than it ever had before. It was only a matter of seconds before she felt the sensation that started with his movement between her legs and then rippled through her. There was no stopping it, and the idea of delaying it was impossible. What he did to her was perfection.

The ability to make her climax so quickly was almost as pleasurable to him as the act itself. Just knowing that she wanted him that badly stroked his ego in ways like nothing else could. She played him perfectly in bed; seducing him with a body that was capable of taking him to the highest of highs and leaving him suspended there until she decided he'd had enough, and then catching him as he collapsed back into her arms. He knew she was a gift, and he vowed to treasure and protect her like nothing he had before in his entire life.

They rode out the moment together, gaining momentum from the other as they satisfied that ache to be close. The attraction between them was so strong that once the idea took hold it was almost impossible to prolong it.

Carly's grip on the sheets loosened as the aftermath of their lovemaking settled on her. She didn't realize how tightly she had been clutching them until she let go and felt the stiffness in fingers. She stretched them out before she slid her hand through his hair as his head rested on her shoulder.

He moaned from the motion of her hand, still feeling the spine tingling effects throughout his body. "Carly, Carly, Carly," he groaned, pushing himself up so he could see her. He kissed her once, thanking her for the great sex and kissed her a second time just because he wanted to. "I think that was a world record for speed."

She bit her bottom lip. "I'm sorry. That was kind of quick wasn't it?"

He leaned back looking at her as if what she said was crazy. "Don't apologize." He kissed her a third time showing her he was pleased, "It worked out really well for me, and by the sound of it," he teased, "it worked out well for you too."

Carly covered her face, giggling. "I'm glad you shut the door."

Steve sat up, feeling rejuvenated. "Me too. Reverend Donner next door would have me in confession ASAP." He pulled his shorts up that were sitting below his hips.

"Do you go to church over there?" Carly asked surprised, pulling part of the sheet over her, feeling chilly now that she didn't have his body on her.

"No." He scooted off the bed going to his dresser, pulling out a T-shirt. "I just know him because we're neighbors and also because of Megan the cat." He came back over to the bed and held the neck of the shirt open for her. "He's a nice guy though."

She lifted her arms as he slid it over her head. "Young or old?"

"Late fifties, early sixties." He pulled it down over her body. "Are you hungry?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed, pulling her hair through the neck hole.

She followed him down the stairs and into the kitchen. His shirt was almost the same length as her skirt. She sat on the counter as he looked through the fridge.

"Damn, I threw everything away before I left." He opened the freezer and smiled back at her, "Ice cream?"

Carly clapped her hands like a little girl.

He opened a drawer between her legs, "Do like Neapolitan?"

She took the spoon from him. "I like all ice cream," she declared. "All ice cream!"

He leaned against the counter between her legs and took the lid off, offering her the first scoop. "I'll make sure I keep a steady supply."

"You'll make me fat," she said with a mouthful.

"More of you to love."

She laughed, "You say that now."

He took a bite, "Then I'll buy you non fat ice cream. There, problem solved."

She giggled, "I'll go grocery shopping tomorrow. Just make a list for me."

"I'll bring the truck home at lunch and ride back with Danny." He took a bite off her spoon that she held up for him. "We need to get you a car." He looked at her "If you think you'll need one." He wasn't sure of her intentions as far as how long she would stay. He hoped forever, but she hadn't even brought anything with her except what she had brought to Craig's house. They had never discussed time, only that she would be coming home with him.

She knew what he was thinking. "There's nothing left in San Diego for me." She wasn't sure if this trip was an open invitation, or what it was. She just knew the thought of leaving him was heart breaking. "I'll work. I don't want you to support me."

He didn't care about money. "So you want to stay for a while?"

"I like it here. So yes. I'd like to stay, and I can chip in and pay for stuff."

He set the ice cream down and faced her, pulling her to the edge of the counter against him. "I don't care about any of that. I just want you here with me." He brushed some of her hair off of her shoulder, "I want you to be happy and I want you do you what ever it is that makes you happy."

"You," she put her hands on his face, feeling his whisker stubble tickle her palm, "you make me happy. I don't want to be away from you. So if this is where you are, then this is where I am too."

That was music to his ears and she caught a glimpse of it in a smile before he hugged her tightly. "I love you, Carly."

She wrapped her legs around him, bringing him intimately closer, "I love you too." She closed her eyes and rested her head on his shoulder not knowing what she had done to deserve him, but knew that she would hang on to him for dear life.


	16. Chapter 16

Steve came in the bedroom and stood looking down on Carly as she slept soundly in his bed. He was right about his premonition the night before. The view was breathtaking. Her hair was fanned out on the pillow and her arm still rested in the same spot he had moved it to after carefully lifting it off his chest.

He had managed to slip out of bed and get ready for work without waking her up. He showered in the hall bathroom and put on clean clothes that were still in the laundry room from before he left. He sat on the edge of the bed and ran his hand gently over her hair, waking her up.

"Carly." She stirred slightly and he said it again, "Carly."

She opened her eyes and was instantly drawn to him. She pushed herself up, still half asleep and moved to him, laying her head in his lap. "Don't go yet," she mumbled, wrapping her arms around him.

He smiled, caressing her bare back that felt like silk beneath his palm. The sheet covered her below the waist but the vision of what lied under it was etched in his brain. That's what worried him. He didn't want to leave her either. Going the entire day without being close to her or being able to touch her was going to be difficult. It had become a habit already and was one he didn't necessarily want to break. He controlled the urge to continue down her back and under the sheet, knowing he would be late for sure if he let that happen.

"I have to go."

She sat up exposing the upper half of her body, leaning in and giving him a kiss. "I know." She hugged him around the neck and body. "I love you." Her voice dismayed because she was missing him already. It was the first time they would be apart.

He hugged her back. "I love you too."

"Please be careful today." She kissed him once more.

She lay back on the bed and he stared down at her, taking in one last look before he had to leave. She was so beautiful, even in the morning. He reached down cupping her face with his hand, gliding his thumb over her moist lips. He was completely and helplessly in love. He couldn't leave her. He just wanted to be with her one more time and knew his morning would be worthless if he couldn't get her out of his system.

He kicked his shoes off and she smiled, helping him lift his shirt over his head before he laid down with her.

* * *

Kono came down the hall and glanced over at Steve's office, speaking to Danny and Chin. "I thought the Boss was back today?"

Danny came from around his desk and stood in the doorway with his hands in his pockets. "He is."

Chin came out too, glancing at his watch. "He's not due in for a couple more minutes."

"He'll be late," Danny declared, as if knowing it.

"Did he call?" Kono asked.

"Nope, but mark my word. He'll be late."

Kono laughed, "He's never been late."

Danny pulled out a wad of money from his pocket and filtered through it, holding up a bill. "I've got twenty bucks that says he's late."

Chin and Kono looked at each other.

"Ok, what do you know that we don't?" Kono asked.

He came out and set the money on the computer table as they joined him. "I met her last night."

Kono's eyes got big. "You mean the mysterious Carly?"

"Really?" Chin said, joining them. "She seems nice on the phone."

"In person too," he agreed, raising an eyebrow. "And she's pretty. And when I say pretty, I mean she is drop dead gorgeous."

Kono shrugged, "So, why do you think he'll be late?"

Danny shook his head, "You don't understand. Steve is different around her."

"How so," Chin asked intrigued?

Danny looked over his shoulder making sure Steve wasn't walking up behind him. "Last night when I picked them up at the airport…" he paused, still not quite believing what he saw.

"What?" Kono urged, also becoming curious over the mystery woman.

Danny almost laughed just trying to get it out. "He was kissing her in the middle of the airport terminal." He held his hand up quickly before they could react, "And I'm not talking just a kiss, I'm talking as if they were filming a movie kiss."

"No way!" Kono blurted out.

"Oh way," Danny nodded.

Chin nodded his approval. "Hmm, Steve's got a crush."

They all three laughed over just the thought of that.

"I'm not kidding you," Danny assured them, "he's different around her."

"Different how," Kono urged him.

"You'll see." He glanced at his watch. "I told you he'd be late."

Kono looked over at Chin, "Steve in love? Making out in airports. I don't buy it." She looked back over at Danny as she made her way over to her office. "I think you're pulling our leg."

"Ok." He said, not wiling to argue with her. She'd see for herself. They both would.

* * *

Steve came in about an hour later, tapping on Danny's office window with his index finger. "Hey, sorry I'm late. I had to scramble up something to wear."

Danny came out of his office, "I didn't even notice the time," he said, giving the other two a 'told you so' look as they came out of their offices to greet him.

"Hey guys," Steve said to Kono and Chin smiling, "Did ya miss me?"

"Hey Boss." Kono came up to him, giving him a quick hug. "Did you have a good trip?"

He fist bumped Chin. "Yes. I had an exceptional trip."

"So we heard. When do we get to meet the new girl?" She teased him.

"Actually," he said, glancing at all three of them, "I was hoping you were all free tonight. I thought we could go over to JJ's for pizza and beer. I'll buy." He looked at Kono in particular. "I'd really like you and Chin to meet her."

Kono's mouth came open just slightly, surprised at his quick introduction. "Tonight? Umm," she glanced at Chin, shrugging, "Sure, I guess. I'm free."

"Yea, me too," Chin agreed. "I can't wait."

Steve slapped Danny on the back, "You'll be there too, right?"

"Of course, pizza and beer on your tab? You know I'm in."

* * *

Carly turned to go back up stairs, "Maybe I'll wear shorts instead."

Steve reached out grabbing her hand, "Hold on!"

"What?" she said impatiently, "I need to change."

"No, you don't," he assured her. "You look great. You look beautiful."

"But we're going to a sport's bar. This is too dressy. They'll think I'm over dressed and trying too hard."

Steve put his arms around her waist, "You are trying too hard." He ran his hand down her ponytail. "Just relax and have fun tonight. They're going to love you and you're going to love them."

Her shoulders slouched and she laid her head on his, "I'm just really nervous. I want them to like me. I know how important they are to you."

"Carly," he almost laughed but didn't want to make fun of her fear but knew she really had nothing too fear, "it's going to be fine."

She lifted her head, her voice shaky, "Do they know I'm still married?"

"Now you're over thinking it. Yes, they do, but they also know the circumstance and they also know me." He bent slightly so he could see her eyes, "Carly, I would never take you tonight if I thought even for a second that you might get hurt."

She looked up at him seeing the truthfulness of that in his eyes and in his voice. She nodded, knowing now she was being ridiculous. "Ok."

He kissed her, "Ok." He stepped back admiring the white sundress he had taken off her the first time they had made love. "And don't change either. I love that dress."

She ran her hands down the front of it, "You do?"

"You bought it for me remember?"

She bit her bottom lip, blushing just slightly over the fact that he had remembered that. She loved how quickly he could ease her down from a stressful moment into a blissful one. "Yes." She put her arms back around him, feeling the fear slide off. God she loved him.

* * *

Carly gripped his hand as they walked into JJ's. She looked around and was instantly charmed by the place. It wasn't touristy like she had anticipated. It was a local hang out joint with dark walls and plenty of sports memorabilia, as well as TV's. There were pool tables in the back and a long bar that stretched along the side and plenty of wood tables and benches to accommodate a crowded night. This particular night it seemed quite, considering it was a weeknight, but she imagined it was packed on the weekend.

She saw Danny and two other people at a table, assuming it was Chin and Kono. She took a deep breath as Steve led her over to them.

They all stood up when they saw him.

He let go of her hand and placed his on her lower back, easing her forward. "Carly," he said casually, pointing to each person individually, "This is Chin, who I believe you spoke to on the phone, indulging him in a story that I wish would just go away."

"Yes," she smiled, taking his hand. "Hi, Chin, it's nice to meet you."

"Good to meet you too, Carly." He agreed wholeheartedly with Danny's description of her. He looked at Steve, "Nani wahine, ho'i."

Steve grinned, "I know."

She looked back and forth between them, having no idea what that meant.

Kono reached her hand out. "It was a compliment. They don't know their manners sometimes and forget that not everyone speaks bird. Hi Carly, I'm Kono."

She wasn't sure what to expect with Kono. She had never met a woman police officer before and Kono certainly didn't fit the description she was imagining either. First off she was much younger than she had anticipated and the natural beauty that radiated from her was stunning, but she was positive that underneath the exterior there must be one tough woman, otherwise how could she be apart of this team. "Hi Kono." She took her hand, feeling a likeness to her right away.

"We brought you something." She reached down under the bench; "Danny said he had an enlightening conversation with you last night. We heard you get nostalgic…" she stood up holding an extra-large bottle of wine, "after a couple of glasses of wine."

Steve went to grab for it when Kono moved it out of his reach, "This isn't for you! This is for Carly."

Carly covered her mouth with her hand, trying not to laugh.

"Can we get you a glass," Kono asked?

"Or perhaps just a straw," Chin jumped in?"

"I'm seeing my error in judgment now of introducing her to you three," Steve growled under his breath.

* * *

The night went on just as Steve had said. They loved Carly and Carly loved them. Two pizzas and a pitcher of beer later and they were all getting along as if they had known each other for years.

"I'll be right back," Carly announced, "I'm going to wash my hands. Greasy pizza fingers and white don't get along." She got up from the table and went to the ladies room.

The three of them watched as Steve followed her with his eyes until she was out of view.

Kono waited until she was out of hearing distance. "She's a keeper, Steve," she announced.

"I have to agree on that," Chin said.

He smiled with pleasure at their acceptance of her. It did mean a great deal to him that they like her. They were like his family and it would have made things difficult if they didn't. But that concern was gone. "She is something, and she really hasn't changed all that much since high school."

"She has stories about you," Danny said, "give us one about her."

Steve contemplated for a minute and then started laughing, "I got one." He laughed again as Carly came walking toward them. "There was a group of us camping one summer up in the mountains," he moved over as Carly sat down next to him. "My buddy Jack and I were sitting by the fire, it was dark, when all of a sudden we heard this blood curdling scream come from above on this small hill next to our camp spot. We both stood up ready to go to war, knowing it was…" he pointed with his thumb to Carly.

"What?" Carly asked, confused about what he was talking about.

"We look up and coming down the hill like a mad woman is Carly."

"No Steve!" she leaned over covering her hand over his mouth, "Please don't tell that story."

The other three laughed, encouraging him even more now.

He pulled her hand down. "She had been up in the woods going pee when she saw a bear."

Her face turned beat red.

"That's scary!" Kono said, "And it's not funny."

"Hold on," Steve said. "She didn't see a bear." He looked over at her and started to laugh.

"It was really dark!" she scolded him. She looked at the other three, rolling her eyes, "It looked like a bear."

"It was a Saint Bernard," Steve blurted out, "from the campsite next door. And not only that, but it was the most gentle dog in the world."

The other three got the amusement and laughed with him.

Just remembering the hilarious sight of her alone was making it difficult for him to continue. "She's sliding down the hill on her bare ass," he laughed, "trying to pull her shorts up," he braced his hand on the table, barely able to speak, "screaming at the top of her lungs as this dog is chasing her, thinking they're playing."

"You are a mean boy!" She tried to act mad, but couldn't hide that it really was funny now that it was sixteen years later.

"Oh my god, it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life." He wiped his eyes, unable to control his laughter as Carly smacked him on the shoulder. He leaned back out of her range, "I thought Jack and I were going to get sick we were laughing so hard."

She looked at the other three as they laughed more at Steve than anything else.

"He was scary looking!" Carly defended.

"He had a ball in his mouth!"

All of them laughed even harder at that one.

* * *

As Steve paid the bill Kono approached Carly. "Do you surf?"

"Yes," Carly said enthusiastically, "I haven't for about ten years, but I used to. Steve said you were a really good surfer."

She shrugged off the compliment, "I can hold my own. Would you like to go this Sunday?"

Carly's eyes shot open, "Sure. I mean, yes. That would be great!" She looked sheepishly at her. "I don't have a board though."

"Don't worry, between Steve and I, we've got you covered."

She smiled as he came toward them. "Kono and I are going surfing Sunday."

He put his arm around her and gave Kono an appreciative smile, "Really? Nice. Are you taking her over to Old Man's or Tongs?"

"Actually I was thinking this time of year that Suicides might be the place to go."

Steve nodded his approval, "You're probably right."

"Excuse me," Carly jumped in, "Suicides? That sounds like for an experienced surfer." She put her hand on her chest, "That's not me."

"In the winter time, yes," Kono assured her, "but in the summer, not so much." She patted her shoulder, "It'll be a good place to start. I'll call you."

"Ok," Carly nodded, "bye Kono."

She waved over her shoulder as she left.

Carly looked up at Steve, "I loved them all."

He held his hands out as if not surprised, "I told you." He pulled her in, "And they loved you too."

Her eyes danced with excitement. "I really love it here Steve. Tomorrow I'm going to look into taking my real-estate license test here in Hawaii so I can get a job."

He ran his hand over her ponytail, "There's no rush. You just got here."

"I know, but I want to get settled in. I don't want to feel like a tourist. I want this to be my home."

He grinned at her, "You want to be Kama`aina."

"What does that mean, Kama`aina?"

"It means you want to be apart of the culture. It's important to not just live here, but to know it. Hawaii is like no place on earth Carly. Once you're here and you embrace it, it will never turn it's back on you. And you won't ever want to leave it either. There's something sacred about these islands that most people don't understand. They only see the exterior beauty; they don't recognize the inner beauty and strength that you can achieve by learning and becoming apart of it."

She had never heard him speak so passionately before about a subject. It inspired her to want that same feeling and desire that he held for his home. "Will you teach me?"

He liked the sound of that. "Of course. `Oe ko`u wahine." He kissed her, taking her hand, "That means you're my woman."

She wrapped her hand around his arm as they left the bar, "Yes I am."

* * *

Carly sat at Steve's computer studying for her real-estate license when her phone went off next to her. She glanced down at the number and knew it was Allan even though she had removed him from her contact list. She hadn't spoken to him since the lake house almost three weeks earlier. She held the buzzing phone in her hand, sighing, not wanting to speak to him, but wondering if it was about the divorce and that she did want to discuss. She decided she would answer and if it was anything but that, she would hang up.

"What do you want?" she answered.

"My, my, you're phone etiquette needs work."

"If you're not calling about the divorce, then I'm hanging up."

"That is why I'm calling. Have you got a lawyer yet?"

"What do we need a lawyer for? Either sell the house and give me half or you just pay me half of what it's worth and we'll call it even. I withdrew my half of the money out of our account."

"I saw that. That was illegal you know."

She gritted her teeth. "So is murder. Don't talk to me about the law Allan."

"Oh that's right." He said coolly, "You're fucking the law every night now, aren't you?"

She couldn't believe the hatred that she felt inside for him. She wanted to hurt him. "Every night, every morning, every afternoon, every chance I get." She knew that did it. His jealousy would feed the fire and give him the pain she was hoping for.

He closed his eyes, seeing them together. His beautiful Carly naked beneath another man was heart breaking too him. It wasn't right.

"Send me the papers Allan. There's no need for you to call me anymore."

Not ever hearing from her again sent him into a panic. "You have to come here and sign them. You have to get your stuff because I'm not boxing it up for you and I'm certainly not sending it to you."

She had been dreading this moment but knew he was right. If she wanted anything she would have to go there to get it. In the heat of the moment she had told him to keep everything, but in reality, there were things she wanted back, possessions that were important to her. "I don't want to see you. When's your next trip? I'll come then."

"I'm leaving in three days for Houston." He lied. "I'll be gone for four days. That should be plenty of time for you to get your shit out of here."

"Fine. Have your lawyer put something together. I'll find someone to look it over while I'm there and we'll get this taken care of. I want you out of my life."

He felt the wounds from the knife in his back as she stabbed him over and over. "Fine. I'll leave the papers on the kitchen table."

Carly said all she had to and hung up. She smiled, knowing she would never have to speak to him ever again.

Allan pulled the phone away from his ear, staring at it. She had hung up on him. She didn't even say good-bye, or give him any closure that he felt he deserved. She just checked out of their relationship of seven years. She wasn't going to get the last word in, he would make sure of that.

* * *

Carly came down the steps, hearing him come home.

"Hi," She went up to him, giving him a kiss and getting one in return. The last three weeks had been like a dream for her. She couldn't have been happier and was positive he felt the same. They had settled in and were living comfortably as if newlyweds. They spent evenings sitting out back by the water talking or curled up on the couch watching TV. Their weekends were spent exploring the island and she was already beginning to understand what it meant to live here. It was paradise.

She knew she had to tell him about Allan's phone call because she had to make that trip. She followed him into the kitchen. "I have to go to San Diego this week." She blurted out.

He was bent over in the fridge and stood up, turning to her. "What? Why?"

"To sign the papers for the divorce and to get my things from the house."

He closed the fridge, suddenly losing his appetite. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Allan won't be there. He's leaving for Houston on Thursday. I can fly over, get my things and then fly home on Sunday."

Steve shook his head, "No. I don't want you going there alone. Just wait a few more weeks and I'll go with you."

"I don't want to wait anymore, plus that will cost a lot of money for both of us to go and I'm sure I have a timeline to sign the papers."

"Have them send the papers here, sign them and send them back."

"I want my stuff, plus like I said, he won't even be there."

"How do you know he won't be there?"

She leaned back against the counter, "Because I talked to him earlier today."

He didn't know why that offended him, but it did. "Really? You talked to him?"

"Yes."

"Did he call you, or did you call him?" He knew that was a dumb question the second it came out, but it was already out there.

"What do you think?" she snapped.

"I don't want you to go," he said flatly.

She was still irritated with his previous question, "Well too late because I already bought my ticket this afternoon."

He looked shocked, "You already…" he threw his hands up, "Oh ok, well thanks so much for talking it over with me."

"I want to get this settled, Steve. I thought you would want that too."

"I do, and don't try to turn this around and say I'm trying to stall you. I'm just saying I don't want you going there alone, Carly. I don't trust him and you shouldn't either."

"I don't trust him! That's why I made sure he won't be there."

"Well I guess you have it all figured out then. There's no need for me to say anything else." He went back to the fridge and opened it just a little too abruptly, standing there looking inside but not seeing the contents, his mind was too consumed with her leaving the island.

She felt bad for not including him, but didn't know it would bother him this much. She thought he'd be happy she was finally getting it done. "Do you want me to make you something to eat?" she tried to make amends.

"No," he grumbled, closing the door and walking past her to the stairs. "I'm going to go for a swim."

She watched him take the stairs two at a time as if he were in a hurry to get away from her. She hung her head down, knowing she should probably go up there and apologize to him, but she knew she was doing the right thing and wanted so desperately to get it over with and move on with her life. She decided to just let him be, hoping he would cool off and eventually agree with her, otherwise it was going to be a long three days before her flight left.

They had said little to each other the rest of the evening. She stayed on the couch watching TV while he went in the garage and tinkered around while straightening it up. Mostly it was just to avoid the subject at hand. He felt cheated out of his say in this decision. But it wasn't so much the betrayal that bothered him; it was still the idea of her going. He knew he couldn't go with her now. He had meetings with the Governor this week and couldn't break them to go to the mainland again, especially if it wasn't for work.

He angrily threw the wrench in his hand down on the work table, shaking his head. It was a mistake for her to go, but as he stood there he began to wonder if it really was his gut telling him or his heart. He had this conscious fear that if she left the island she may never come back.

Carly turned the light off and crawled into bed next to him. She laid on her side, with her back to him, feeling the distance between them. It was horrible.

He laid on his back and glanced over at her. He had kept his distance for most of the evening but knew he wouldn't get a wink of sleep if he continued the separation. Plus it wasn't fair to her. This was the one place where he didn't want tension between them no matter what happened during the day, he didn't want it to end with them sleeping apart, even though they were in the same bed.

He rolled over and put an arm around her waist, not in the close intimate way he normally did, but it was a gesture.

She felt relieved and scooted back closer to him, taking his hand and pulling it up under her chin, holding it there.

Neither one of them said a word, but they both fell asleep within a matter of minutes.


	17. Chapter 17

Carly sat on the edge of the bed, listening to him downstairs getting ready for work. It had been the longest three days of her life. She looked at the clock on the nightstand hoping he left before the shuttle got there to take her to the airport.

She froze, hearing his footsteps come up the stairs, hoping he was coming to kiss her goodbye. She felt she might cry the entire time she was gone if he didn't.

She stared at the doorway and he suddenly appeared. He wasn't in his normal work apparel. That day he wore dark dress slacks and a button down blue shirt. She didn't think she had ever seen him look so handsome. However, the expression on his face mirrored hers.

He leaned against the door frame, looking from her to the carry on bag next to the bed. "I wish you'd let me take you to the airport. It's ridiculous that you're taking a shuttle."

"You have that meeting this morning and who knows with traffic. I don't want you to be late. Besides," she grinned, "you'd probably take me the long way around the island."

He walked toward her, holding his hand out. She took it happily and stood up.

"Promise me that you won't go to the house without Craig."

She nodded, "I promise. It won't take me long anyway. I've made a list of things I want. It's not much."

He brought her hand up to his lips, kissing the back of it. He wanted to tell her again not to go, but instead he said nothing. He had checked out Allan's story and found his name on a flight manifest to Houston about the same time that Carly would be landing. That had put some of his worry at ease, but he still couldn't shake that intuitive feeling that she was wrong. He put his arms around her and hugged her tightly. "I love you."

She laid her forehead on his shoulder, thankful for that. "Please don't worry. I left the hotel information on the desk." She looked up at him smiling. "I'll be home on Sunday and we can make up for the last three days." She rubbed her hands over his chest, "I love you too." The concern in his eyes didn't change, which frustrated her. "Steve, please don't do this."

"Then don't you do this," he countered.

She let her hands drop, sitting back down on the bed. "Why are you trying to make me feel bad about this?"

"Is that what you think I'm doing?" he asked, feeling the same frustration.

"That's what it feels like. I'm doing this for us, so we can move on!" she said, feeling like she'd said it a hundred times over the last three days, but it just wasn't sinking in. She looked up at him curiously, "Please don't tell me that you think I'm going to meet Allan?" His expression went from concerned to angry. She quickly tried to cover it, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that."

"That never crossed my mind," he said coolly, "should it have?"

"No," she replied regretfully, "of course not." She reached out, taking his hand." I'm sorry Steve."

He decided then that his argument for this trip was over. That comment stung. He bent over and kissed her on the cheek only, "I'll see you Sunday." He turned and walked out of the room.

She had done it again. She had brought her twisted relationship with Allan into she and Steve's. That was a comment she would have accused him of, not Steve. She put her hands up to her face, cursing herself for such a careless mistake. She heard the door close, feeling that distance between them growing. She wished he was coming with her, but it was too late now and she had only herself to blame.

* * *

Steve came into the reception area of the Governor's office, seeing Danny already there.

"Good Morning Commander," the receptionist acknowledged him. "Governor Denning is on a phone call at the moment and will be with you shortly.

"Thank you." He took a seat next to Danny. "Hey."

"People will say we look like twins," he joked, commenting on their matching outfits of slacks and shirt.

Steve smiled only slightly, not feeling the humor.

"What's with you?"

He looked over at him, reminding him with the frown on his face.

"So she's still going."

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "She's going."

"I don't know what you're worried about. We checked him out. He's confirmed booked on that flight, your buddies going with her to the house and she's staying in a hotel. You covered her bases."

He looked over at him, "Then why can't I be as relaxed as you and everyone else?"

"I don't know. Do you not trust her?"

"Of course I trust her!"

Danny shrugged, "Maybe you don't want her to get divorced. Maybe you're not ready for that commitment yet."

Steve sat up, glaring at him, "Yes I am! I love..." he hesitated and then rephrased it. "I'm not afraid to be with her. Jesus Danny."

"Then it must be your controlling issue. You can't stand that you're not there to control the situation."

"It's not that!" he said, getting pissed off by the irritating line of questions that he asked.

Danny sat back, casually laying his arm on the back of the chair next to him. "Then what is it?"

Steve let out a breath, knowing exactly what it was and why he was pushing him. "I just don't feel right about it."

"You don't feel right, or is it that nagging little voice in your head," he said knowingly, quickly holding his hand up, "and let me say thank God that voice is in your head or I might have strangled it a long time ago." He leaned over speaking frank to him now, "That weird little voice is consistently right. It's like your sixth sense and you know it. Hell, even I know it! So why are you ignoring it?"

Steve went to say something when the receptionist spoke up.

"Commander McGarrett, Detective Williams, the Governor will see you now."

They both stood up. Steve looked to the exit when the Governor came out of his office.

"Good morning gentleman. Come inside."

Danny waited to see what he was going to do.

Steve stood there like he was frozen to the floor. He knew his duty was to walk toward the Governor, but a more important part of him was pulling him in another direction. He felt a nudge on his arm as Danny held the keys to the Camaro out to him.

"Switch cars, you'll get there faster and can park in the drop off zone."

Steve looked at him, reaching in his pocket taking his keys out handing them to him as he took the others. He looked across the room to the Governor standing in the doorway. "I'm sorry Sir. I…" he started walking toward the exit, "I have to go. I apologize."

He looked at both of them oddly, "Did you just get a case?"

"No Sir," Steve said, backing away from him. "I have to go to the airport."

"Commander, we've had this meeting on the books for three weeks and you are telling me now that you can't make it?"

Steve glanced at his watch, knowing her flight left in less than an hour. "Sir I can't stay…" he looked at Danny for help.

"Just go," he motioned with his hands. "I'll take care of it."

"I'm sorry Sir," was all he could say. The pull was so great now that nothing was going to stop him.

Danny walked over to the office door. "Let me explain, Governor. You're a married man right?" He followed him inside closing the door behind him.

* * *

Steve pulled up to the end of the terminal drop off zone and got out, motioning to one of the security guards, showing him his badge. "I won't be long."

He nodded his approval.

He went inside and scanned the immediate area for her.

Carly came out of security and slipped her shoes back on. She sat on the bench for an extra minute, staring at the ground, thinking about him. She had done that non-stop since he had left her earlier. She played their last conversation over and over in her head and every time she did, it was like pouring salt in the wound, only it was Steve's wound and she was the horrible one that held the ingredient.

She stood up, pulling her carry-on and walking slowly toward the gate as eager passengers walked past her like she was standing still. With every step she took she felt the gap growing between them until she finally stopped not able to take another step, wondering what she was doing there. It was as if a light finally came on and she understood. He was just trying to protect her and she didn't trust his judgment. She didn't trust him. That one thought was what brought the tears.

She hung her head, trying to hide that she was standing in the middle of the terminal crying.

She had made so many bad decisions in her life and here she stood making the biggest one yet. She suddenly gasped, feeling a sudden panic swell in her. She gripped the handle on her carry on and spun around, feeling an urgency to find him.

As she turned she ran smack dead into a body.

"I'm sorry!" she apologized, and then looked up. The shock of seeing him right there at that second was overwhelming. She stared at him, not able to put two words together from the hundreds that were bouncing around in her head.

He was amused by the look on her face. Even in a state of shock she was beautiful. He knew she had been crying and wondered if that was over him, secretly hoping it was. He had come there to plead his case one more time and per sway her not to go, no matter what it took, even if it meant getting on that plane with her.

As the initial surprise wore off the reasoning behind him being there took its place, not that she cared what it was. He was there. What had she been thinking? She mumbled something to that effect as she wrapped her arms around his neck, throwing her body into him.

He said the one thing he came to say as he buried his hand in her hair. "Come home."

She nodded repeatedly still not able to communicate or believe that he was standing there. She felt his grip tighten over her reply. "I'm sorry. I couldn't…" she cried, "I wasn't going to go."

He smiled, knowing now that she was crying over him and that she had come to trust in his judgment. He felt that familiar boost of his ego that only she could deliver. It just made him love her all the more.

She slid her arms down from around his neck, whimpering. "I'm sorry."

He bent his head and kissed her. "We don't have to talk about it anymore."

She felt his hand slide into hers as his other one took the carry-on handle. She gripped his arm with her other hand and walked close to him as he led her out of the airport.

* * *

Allan sat on his bed and waited. It was already six o'clock in the evening. He knew her plane had landed several hours ago. There were only a couple of direct flights in from Honolulu to San Diego. He was sure she would come straight to the house, if anything else just to get the papers.

He stood up and paced the room, hearing a car outside. He ran to the window, watching it drive by. He pounded his fist on the wall, "Where are you?" The words barely exited his mouth when his cell phone rang.

He saw Carly's number and answered eagerly. "Hello."

"Allan," Steve said into the phone, "This is Steve."

He felt his blood boil, "What do you want?"

"Carly's not going to be coming to get her things. I'm sending Craig over to get what she wants. He's going to be accompanied by a friend of mine, so I suggest you leave the house if you are there?"

He narrowed his eyes, "I'm not home. I'm in Houston."

Steve sighed heavily into his ear. "You're full of shit. You never got on that flight. Do you actually think that I would send her there without checking on you."

"You son of bitch! Who do you think you are?" he stormed around their master bedroom. "That's an invasion of privacy!"

Steve laughed, "Try again."

"Fuck you! Put Carly on the phone!" he yelled.

Steve's voice was overly calm, "You sound upset Allan. Did I spoil some plans?"

"You tell that fucking whore that she's not getting anything out of this house!"

"I don't think that's going to happen," his voice hardening. "She's going to get everything she wants."

"Yea, don't bet on it." He looked toward the door when he heard the doorbell ring.

Steve heard it too. "You should get that. It's Craig and two uniformed officers with a warrant and signed document from Carly and a lawyer here in Hawaii, giving him permission to get those items that she wants. And if you try to interfere they'll arrest you."

Allan glanced over at the items on the bed. He hung up the phone and quickly wrapped everything up in the bedspread and shoved it under the bed.

* * *

Steve pulled the phone away from his ear, smiling. He came out to the other room where Carly was and sat down next to her on the couch. "Craig's there right now."

She swallowed, but found it difficult. "Allan was there wasn't he? At the house?"

Steve nodded, "Yes."

She put her hands over her mouth, "Oh God Steve. You knew." She looked at him with wonder. "You knew something was up all along."

"It was a hunch."

"I'm sorry I doubted you."

"You didn't really. You eventually figured it for yourself. You wouldn't have gone."

She loved that he didn't gloat over it and somehow made it sound like she was the real hero, when in fact it was him that was the hero. Her hero. "You really are something, you know that?"

He chuckled over that, "Just doing my job ma'am."

She pushed him back on the couch and straddled him, "And what is that job exactly?" she rubbed her hands over his chest. "Please be specific."

He was enjoying her playfulness. The last three days had been difficult. He missed her. "You're going to think it's a selfish answer."

She looked intrigued.

He laid his head back on the couch looking at her. "I've got used to you being around. I think I'd be a mess if I lost you."

The sincerity in his voice catapulted her to another level in their relationship. She looked upon him with different eyes and a new level of love that was far beyond anything she had ever imagined. She would never leave him again.

She leaned forward, pinning him into the sofa with her body, kissing him. She felt his hands move up and into her hair as the kiss intensified.

She took her hands, gliding them up his arms until she reached his hands and then pulled them away, breaking from the kiss at the same time. She stared at him as she moved them above his head, holding them there with one hand as she began to unbutton his shirt with the other.

She kissed his bare chest, releasing his hands that remained in place as she moved from one nipple to the other and then slowly sliding down his body until she knelt between his legs on the floor, continuing to torture him with kisses that made his heart accelerate and his breathing become quick short gasps.

"Where you going?" he panted.

She smiled up at him between kisses, "Just doing my job, Sir."

She ran her hands up the inside of his thighs over his dress pants like he had done to her so many times, driving her mad. The reaction she got from him was just as much of a turn on as if he was doing the performing. It only encouraged her to go further, undoing his belt and zipper.

Steve gripped the back of the couch as she escalated the moment to what he could only describe as pure and absolute ecstasy.

* * *

Carly reached for his hand as he pulled her up to where he was standing. He gripped her around the waist, holding her steady on the small ledge.

She caught her balance, laughing as she grabbed the branch behind him. They were both sweaty from the climb but had reached their destination. He carefully let his hold loosen.

"Turn around," he said, face to face with her.

She shuffled her feet grinning at him as she made her way around to the same direction he was. The second she saw the view she stopped moving. The difficult climb and scraped knee was worth it. She had never seen anything so magnificent in her entire life.

The lush green valley below narrowed as it flowed into the crystal blue Pacific Ocean. She could barely make out the white sandy beach they had visited a couple of weeks earlier and spent the day snorkeling and just relaxing. The flowers that were within reaching distance where so colorful they looked too beautiful to be real. The mountains on the other side of the valley rose up to the sky as if they were hands reaching for the heavens.

She leaned back against him. "It's flawless." She smiled, looking at him over her shoulder, "I can't believe I ola here."

He kissed her on the cheek, "It's a perfect day. There isn't a cloud in the sky."

She held onto his arm that was around her waist. "Mahalo for bringing me."

He smiled at her use of the Hawaiian language. She had been learning and trying to accommodate everyday words into her conversations. He was proud of her for that.

"You're e komo mai."

It had been a little over two months since she'd arrived. He loved being with her every second he could. The divorce was pending and he knew the second it was finalized that he would marry her. He had the ring; he just needed the opportunity to ask her and wanted it to be after the divorce so she could plan a wedding the way she wanted with no barriers to jump over.

They hadn't heard from Allan again, mainly since they had changed her cell number. The only communication came through his lawyer who brought unrealistic quotes for the sale of the house and demanded Carly agree. She of all people knew what it was worth and knew he was just toying with her. He refused to agree on offers stating it wasn't high enough, to the point where they would bid themselves out of the sale. This had happened three times until Carly finally decided she'd had enough and signed the house over to him, giving up her share. She just wanted it done. After that there was nothing else for him to argue and the papers went through the courts for the proper filing. She was just waiting for the call from her lawyer giving her the exact day.

They made their way down the ledge and along a path that wasn't used very often. She followed behind him as he moved branches and over grown foliage out of her way.

"Where are we going?"

He smiled back at her, "You'll see."

She loved that answer, feeling the excitement grow inside of her.

He finally stopped and moved a large overhanging branch that looked down on a small creek about twenty feet below.

"Do you want to go down there?"

"Yes." She went past him, leading the way this time.

They both collapsed on the soft moss and dirt that was on the bank of the creek.

Carly leaned over to take a drink when Steve stopped her.

"You can't drink it."

"Why not? It looks clean."

"There are lots of bacteria in there from the moss and plants. It might be ok, but I don't want to take a chance." He pulled out the water bottle from his backpack handing it to her.

She took a long drink, giving it back to him. "How did you know about this place?"

"I've been all over this area. This isn't even the best one. There's another spot on the other side that's even prettier, but it's harder to get too."

"Prettier than this?" she couldn't believe it. "That's crazy talk," she teased.

She laid back and looked around them, up into the trees and the side of the hill. "It's pretty remote here."

He leaned over her. "Just you and me."

She grinned at him, putting a hand on his chest. "Don't even think about it."

He leaned down and kissed her. "Think about what?"

"You know. I see that look in your eye."

He raised an eyebrow as his hand slid under her shirt. "What look?"

She giggled and squirmed away from him. "We can't. You know I'm out of pills until my prescription comes through and unless you have some condoms in our backpack, which I'm sure you don't." She hesitated, giving him a hopeful look. "Or do you?"

He shook his head sadly, "Nope. But…" he moved up on her, "what do we need them for?"

"So I won't get pregnant," she said matter-of-factly, even though she wasn't sure she could.

"Would that be such a bad thing?" he caressed her stomach, looking right into her.

She knew he wasn't teasing her, he meant it. She shook her head, "No."

He took that as permission granted and kissed her.

It was unreal to them how different it felt making love with no contraceptives of any kind. It was completely natural and with the environment that surrounded them it just added to the moment they were in. They lay naked in each other's arms, taking their time, enjoying the feel of it. He rose above her, bracing on his elbow so he could see her face. Her hands moved over him, touching and gripping when the moment called for it. He moved slowly on her, able to feel the inside of her body wrapped around him, caressing him.

She pulled her self up close to his face, overcome by emotions that radiated from every pore in her body, knowing that they could be making a baby.

"I love you," she whispered to him, "I love you so much."

He slid his arm behind her back, holding her firmly in place. "Say it again," he begged her. The sound of her voice and the words she spoke were the most erotic thing he'd ever experienced.

She pushed her hips into him. "I love you Steve." She moaned as his movement increased. She kept pace with him, watching him, wanting it more for him than for her. He held the seed she wanted inside of her.

He moaned and his body shuttered as he came inside her, praising her name as if he were worshiping and giving thanks to her. It lasted longer than usual and he wanted to make love to her this way, every time.

She pulled him down with her as she lay back, letting him rest. She closed her eyes and swore she could feel him moving through her, giving her the one thing she was missing in her life. He went to ease some of the weight and she squeezed him, "Wait, don't move," she whispered, "It feels so good."

He did as he was told and passed the time by kissing her neck and running his hand up and down her soft body. "Mmm," he murmured, "I love you, Carly."

She smiled with her eyes still closed as she felt his cheek gently rub against hers, his whiskers tickling her. She opened her eyes and he was looking at her.

"God you are beautiful." He felt weak just looking at her. "There isn't anything in this world that I wouldn't do for you. I love you that much."

"You're giving me everything I want right now," she grinned. "I want a nice strong keiki, that will grow up sweet and handsome just like you."

He smiled, "Or a beautiful little kaikamahine, with long black hair that will steal my heart just like her Mother."

"I would like a girl too."

"Anything you want." He laid back down, hugging her. "Anything you want, Carly."

* * *

Carly leaned out the backdoor, speaking to Steve and Danny who were sitting halfway down the yard in chairs. "It's almost done."

They both acknowledged her.

"What is she making again?" Danny asked.

"I don't know, something with fish." He gave him a stern look, "Do me a favor and just eat it."

He groaned, knowing what that meant. "Oh man," he whined, "she has no idea what she's doing, does she?"

Steve shrugged, "Sometimes yes and sometimes no, but she tries hard so I eat it."

Danny laughed, "You are so whipped! I can't believe you eat food you don't like just to please her."

"I don't do it just to please her," he quickly defended, "sometimes the stuff she makes is pretty good." He made a face, "but it's just when she makes fish, it's not always the best."

"Oh great," Danny moaned, shoving him, "Go sneak in the house and get some chips."

"You'll be fine. She's having a good day so don't spoil it."

"What's the special occasion?"

Steve smiled, "Her divorce is final today. She's…" he stopped and corrected himself, "We, are very happy about that."

Danny tapped his beer against Steve's. "Nice. So are you going to pop the question tonight?"

"No, not tonight. I think she might be expecting it, so I'm going to throw her off and wait a couple of days, catch her unexpectedly."

"Do you know how you're going to do it?"

"Kind of."

"It's important you know, the approach, or you may not get the answer you were hoping for."

Steve looked over at him and scoffed, "I'm pretty confident she'll say yes."

"Maybe, but do you want it to be a yes she'll remember fondly, or just a yes to a question?"

Steve glared at him, half annoyed and the other half a little frightened. "What are you doing to me?"

"I'm just trying to help you out."

"Well don't!" he shook his head as if trying to get that thought out of it, "The only favor I need from you right now is to eat whatever she puts in front of you."

"That's beginning to sound like a chore rather than a favor."

They both turned as she yelled out that dinner was ready.

Steve pointed a finger at him as they stood up, "Be good."

Danny huffed, "I hope her dinner is taking that same advice."

Steve laughed, pushing him toward the house.

* * *

Carly sat at the table looking back and forth between the two of them as they slowly ate their food, wondering when one of them was going to break down and tell her it was awful. She had decided that on her first bite. She looked over at Steve and he smiled, scooping up another fork. She knew it wouldn't be him, so she focused on Danny.

"What do you think?"

He looked at Steve first and then at her, nodding, "It's good."

"It is huh?" She sat back in her chair. "Is that why you take a big drink of beer after every bite?"

He looked over at Steve again for help.

"Its good sweetie," Steve argued, taking another bite.

She rolled her eyes at him, "You be quiet. I know you're just being nice because you love me." She looked back over at Danny. "You though, I expected more honesty from you."

He dropped his fork on the plate. "Ok. It's terrible." He took another drink. "I can't even tell what kind of fish is in there it's so bad."

"C'mon Danny!" Steve scolded him. "That's a little harsh."

"No it's not," Carly laughed, "it is horrible!" She stood up and reached over taking Danny's plate first. "It's sweet that you guys ate as much as you did."

"It wasn't that bad," Steve reassured her.

She took his plate and leaned down giving him a kiss on the cheek. "How many of my other dinners have you forced your way through," she asked, looking over her shoulder at him as she put the plates in the sink.

Danny answered for him, knowing he would never tell her. "A lot."

"Hey!" he snapped at him. "That's not true, Carly."

"Well I have a back up for tonight." She picked her cell phone up off the counter and dialed.

They both looked at each other wondering what, until she spoke.

"Hi. I'd like to order an extra-large pizza, all meat." She smiled at them. "The name is Steve."

* * *

Steve came up behind her as she cleaned the dishes off. "Do you want anything else from the pizza place?"

"Get me a salad too if they have any."

"Ok." He leaned back against the counter so he could see her. "I don't force my way through your dinners."

She smiled, knowingly, "Yes you do. But from now on I want you to tell me. How am I supposed to get any better at cooking if I keep making it the same way thinking that you like it?"

"I just didn't want to hurt your feelings."

She kissed him for that, reminded again that he would do anything for her. "You're a good man. I love you."

He patted her on the butt, "Cooking may not be the highlight of your talents, but believe me, you make up for it in other departments."

She rolled her eyes at him, blushing slightly.

He walked into the family room, "Lets go."

Danny stood up, "Do you have your wallet?" he asked.

"Yes, he said, grabbing his keys off the table.

"Ah huh," he said, not believing him, taking his out and setting it on the coffee table, "just to be sure. I'm not taking mine."

Steve chuckled, patting his back pocket. "It's right here."

Carly heard them leave as she continued with the dishes. She couldn't help but laugh at herself as she cleaned the pan that she had made the fish in. She had followed the directions but couldn't figure out where she had gone wrong. She decided that maybe she'd take a cooking class. And then went one better, a Hawaiian cooking class. If anyone knew how to cook fish it was Hawaiians.

She heard the door open and close. "Did you forget your wallet?" she yelled out.

She glanced over her shoulder when she didn't get a reply. "Steve?"

"Hello Carly."

Her heart dropped to her stomach as she stared at Allan.

* * *

"You don't know what you're talking about," Steve argued as he and Danny drove to the pizza place.

"I'm telling you, girls like those bragging rights, so you better make it good."

"Ok fine," he sighed. "I'll tell you. Sometimes we eat ice cream in the middle of the night. I was going to do it then."

Danny looked at him queerly, "That's when you are going to propose to her? Over ice cream?"

"It's this thing we do," he defended. "She sits on the counter and we share out of the carton. It's become like a ritual."

"A ritual?"

"Yea, you know, after sex." Steve grinned knowing that would shut him up.

Danny threw his hands up, "Ok, stop! Enough!" he shook his head. "I can't listen to that. You two are obnoxious. I don't know which is worse, Carly's fish or that story."

They both looked at each other, "Carly's fish." They said in unison.

* * *

Carly backed down the counter away from him. "What are you doing here?"

"You don't seem very happy to see me."

"Steve's going to be home any second."

He could hear the fear in her voice. "No he's not. He just left."

Carly looked past him to the stairs, knowing Steve kept a gun in the nightstand drawer. "What do you want Allan?"

"I want you to come with me," he said calmly.

She shook her head, "I'm not going anywhere with you."

"I thought we could celebrate this eventful day together." He took a step toward her.

"You should leave, Allan." She pointed to the door. "I want you to leave!"

"You are aware of what today is?" He moved toward the counter backing her up so she had nowhere to go.

She moved further away as he came closer. She felt the cutting board handle that she had used to cut the fish on hit her back. "He's with his partner." Her voice shuttered as she tried to keep calm, "He's going to be very angry that you're here Allan."

He lunged forward, startling her, angry over that statement. "I don't care!" he bellowed, "Do you think I give a shit what HE thinks?!"

She felt that same fear soar through her that she had so many times before when they would argue. "I'm sorry," she whimpered, feeling her eyes filling with tears. She listened for the car outside, willing them to hurry home. She looked back up at him and her fear multiplied when she saw the blade in his hand.

"Please Allan," she murmured, "what do you want from me?"

The scowl on his face mirrored the tone of his voice. "I want the respect I deserve! I want you to stand there and beg for my forgiveness!" He took a step closer to her, "Beg me, Carly!"

She screamed as he slashed the air with his knife. "Allan stop!"

"Allan stop!" He mocked her in a frightened girl's voice, "Don't hurt me." He glared at her as his eyes turned dark with furry. "What about me, Carly?!" He slammed his hand into his chest angrily, "Did you think about my pain while you were fucking him?!"

She stared at the knife in his hand, watching his movement as he berated her. She had no way around him without being within reaching distance. She knew the pizza place wasn't too far and they would be back soon. She just had to keep him talking.

"I am sorry Allan. I didn't mean to hurt you."

His expression turned remorseful as his eyes scanned her body. "Make love to me then, Carly, like you used too."

She shook her and started to cry, wondering if he was going to rape her. "No Allan, I can't do that."

He looked up into her eyes as he came closer, "Take your clothes off."

She shook her head, feeling the cutting board in her back again, deciding that she would use it if he came at her. She wasn't going to let him touch her. She'd rather risk it and fight her way through than let him do that to her. "No Allan."

"Then I'll cut them off you."

She turned and grabbed the wood cutting board as he came at her, swinging it around blindly and connecting with his jaw. He his head flew backward and she heard the crack as two of his top teeth broke in half from the blow. She ran past him as he stumbled backwards, cursing and grabbing his jaw.

He swung the knife at her as she ran past but missed.

She held on to the board and ran for the stairs, not looking back. She needed to get to the nightstand drawer.

Allan gripped the knife in his hand. His rage gained momentum with every step he took. He growled through the pain as blood dripped off his chin. He ran up the stairs seeing her enter the far bedroom and close the door. He made it there but not before she locked it. He pounded his fist on it. "You fucking bitch!" He stepped back and put his foot up, kicking it.

She flew across the bed to Steve's side and opened the drawer, pulling out his gun. She could barely hold it; her hands shook so badly. She fumbled with the safety when the door flew open. She pointed it at him, pulling the trigger as he came across the bed, but nothing happened.

She heard herself screaming as he attacked her over and over, not settling on one particular area but anywhere he could penetrate her. She felt the first few stabs but after that her whole body was in pain not able to register on the individual puncture wounds that just kept coming. Her hands tried to block him but she was powerless against the blind rage that he inflicted on her. Finally, after what felt like eternity he stopped.

Allan stumbled to his feet, looking down on what he had done. She lay in a fetal position, staring forward with blank eyes; bleeding so badly that the only way he could tell she was still alive was from for the gasps of air that she struggled for every few seconds. He wiped his hand across his mouth and only then did he remember the broken jaw. He felt tears sting his eyes, realizing that he had killed her in his fit of rage. He had murdered Carly. He was going to go to prison. Steve would never let him get away. Panic set in and he stepped back away from her, it was then that he saw the gun on the floor and picked it up.

She lay facing the french doors looking out the window, trying desperately to catch her breath. She could see him standing over her staring at her, but she didn't fear him anymore, he had already killed her. She couldn't speak but mouthed Steve's name over and over, willing him to come home before she died. She needed to see him one last time. She didn't want to die alone; she wanted to die in his arms.


	18. Chapter 18

Steve came in the house behind Danny, carrying the pizza and salad. He glanced around the living area not seeing her.

"Carly? Pizza boy's are here."

He came in the kitchen and set the food down on the counter, not noticing the drips of blood on the floor. "Carly?" he yelled out again. "Where did she go?" He leaned over the sink, glancing out the window.

"Maybe she got wind of your proposal and packed up," Danny teased, opening the pizza box and taking out a slice.

"Shut up," Steve replied, walking toward the stairs. "You're a pain in my ass."  
He held his pizza up to him like he was agreeing.

Carly could hear his voice calling for her. Her first thought was their safety, praying that Allan had left the house and that he wouldn't harm either of them. She wanted to call out to him, but that was impossible. She could feel the vibration on the floor as he came up the upstairs. '_Just a few seconds more'_, she told herself. '_He's coming_.' She held still not able to move after finding a position where she could breathe with only a minimal amount of pain, although as time went on it was becoming more and more of a challenge. She tried not to look at the blood that had formed in a small puddle on the wood floor close to her face. Her hands trembled as she fought to stay awake; wanting desperately to close her eyes and go to sleep but feared she may not wake up. She needed to see him one more time before she went to sleep. She needed to tell him she loved him.

Steve came in the bedroom, noticing the bedspread in disarray. There was an odor in the room that was vaguely familiar, giving him a bad feeling all around.

Danny reached in the fridge for the gallon of milk when he heard his name being screamed from upstairs. The sound startled him, causing him to drop the milk on the floor as another scream with the same intensity called for him. He felt a shiver run down his spine over the panic in Steve's voice. He'd never heard such a terrifying plea for help, especially coming from him.

He took the stairs two at a time, hearing the plea come again, only this time it was more of a sob. He came running in the master bedroom and looked across the bed as Steve kneeled on the floor, holding Carly's head in his hands.

"Help me!" That panic returning to his voice.

Danny came over the bed on all fours, getting his first glimpse of the devastation on the other side. He understood now.

"Oh my God!" he shuttered, seeing more blood than he ever had in his life. "Oh my God, Carly!" He scooted to the end and shoved the bed to the side towards the door so he could get in next to her. "What happened?"

"I don't know!" Steve's voice shook.

Danny put unsteady fingers up to her neck, checking to see how steady her pulse was. At the same time he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. He took his bloody hand from her neck and shoved Steve, "Towels!"

He looked down not wanting to leave her, even for that short length of time. "Its ok sweetie," Steve consoled her as she looked up at him, but the look on his face showed his fear on every level. "Danny," he pleaded but didn't continue, looking back down as her nails dug into him.

She pulled on his arm trying to climb up on his lap as he knelt next to her. "Allan," she mumbled trying to communicate to him.

Danny talked to 911 on the phone giving them Steve's info, knowing it would be in the database and hoping that would hurry them up. He tried to describe her condition but didn't know where to start. He put the phone on speaker and set it on the floor. "Steve, get me some towels." He tried to sound as calm as possible and couldn't believe it actually came out that way compared to what was happening inside of him.

Steve carefully set her head on the floor and scrambled back running to the bathroom.

Carly looked up at Danny as he unbuttoned her blouse and spoke to the operator at the same time, describing her wounds on her arms, but when he opened her blouse he wasn't prepared for what he saw. He felt tears sting his eyes as he tried to count the stab wounds and communicate with the 911 operator. "I count nine on her torso." He looked at her face, rubbing his hand gently over her hair as she stared at him, trying to speak.

Steve came up behind him, holding an arm full of towels and dropped to his knees when he saw her body. He knew she was hurt bad, but the overall reality hit him that more than likely she was going to die. He bent over her, putting his face close to hers, "Its ok. Everything's going to be ok." He felt none of the confidence he did when he saved her life by the lake. There was nothing he could do for her except keep her talking and awake until the Paramedics got there. He felt if he could just do that then maybe she could make it to the hospital. His fear turned to despair as he kissed her lips that were already cold. "You're strong Carly!" He saw her mouth move and the determination in her eyes. She wanted to speak. "What sweetie?" He tried to hold back the tears that filled his eyes.

She tried to catch her breath, wanting to tell him two things. She concentrated on the task as she felt Danny covering her with towels that took away some of the chill that had collected over her. "Allan," she whispered, "it was… Allan."

Steve nodded his understanding, "It was Allan." He repeated it for her sake. He felt a wave of guilt for not preventing it, for not being more aware of what he was capable of.

She looked over at Danny as if wanting him to hear too.

Steve looked up at him, "Did you hear that?"

Danny nodded, staring at her as she pleaded with him to acknowledge, not wanting this act to go unpunished. "Yes," he had to swallow down his sorrow before he could continue, "It was Allan."

She looked relieved and then focused back on Steve, taking in another breath that was becoming more and more difficult to achieve. "I love you," she said as she exhaled, finally being able to say what she wanted too. He repeated it to her and she smiled ever so slightly. She felt a calm come over her and closed her eyes, wanting to sleep now.

"Carly?" Steve cried out, "Open your eyes, Carly!"

She felt a gentle shaking and forced her eyes open one last time, taking in another breath, "Don't be afraid," she sighed, seeing so much of that in his eyes. "I'll be ok." She honestly felt that everything was going to be fine. He was there. She would be ok, just like she was that day by the lake. He would take care of her. She closed her eyes again and drifted off, hearing his plea, but she had no more strength, she just wanted to sleep.

"Carly!" He yelled at her, "Carly!" He looked up at Danny as he reached across him putting his fingers under her neck.

"Oh shit," he whimpered, "put her down, Steve! Put her down!"

Steve laid her out flat on the floor as Danny began to perform CPR on her chest. "Breathe for her!"

Steve tilted her head back and breathed in her mouth, watching her chest rise and fall. He did it two more times as Danny then took over the chest compressions. They worked as a team, fighting to get her back.

"Please, Carly!" he yelled at her, moaning as if knowing it was too late, "please baby, please don't die!"

"Breathe!" Danny yelled again for Steve to do his part. "Where the fuck are they?!" he screamed in the phones direction. It was then that they heard the sirens and truck engines coming up the driveway. "Tell them were upstairs!" he said into the phone, "she's gone into cardiac arrest!"

Steve kept his face close to hers, talking to her as Danny pushed on her chest again. "C'mon sweetie," he begged. His voice shattered with emotion. "I'm scared Carly, don't leave me."

"Breathe!" Danny ordered.

Steve put his mouth back over hers, switching emotions in the blink of an eye. He performed his duty by breathing life into her, knowing his future was balancing on the same fence. It was only when he would break to let Danny take over, did he let himself feel the fear that was becoming more and more difficult to suppress as time ticked by and she didn't respond. "Carly, please," he begged over and over with her lifeless body, "I love you. I need you with me." He looked up as the Paramedics came in the room. He was almost afraid to leave her, fearful that if he did he would lose her for sure. He stared down at her face that had become as peaceful looking as if he were leaning over her while she slept in their bed, like he had done so many times, just watching her beautiful face.

Danny leaned over him, getting both his hands under his armpits and pulling him out of the way.

* * *

Steve and Danny followed Carly's gurney through the ER and into the awaiting room. Two ER Doctors and three nurses were already standing there, anticipating their arrival. Her condition had been stable after getting her heart started with the paddles back at the house. She had held her own through the ambulance ride but as they brought her in the room her condition worsened once again.

The commotion in the room seemed chaotic to he and Danny, but to the people working in it, it was like a well-choreographed dance. Doctors and nurses moved around each other, knowing where to put what and when to move for the other person without having to be instructed. Vitals were called out every few seconds and to Steve's horror they were getting worse every time. The paddles were brought out again and he felt Danny's hand clutch his shoulder while his own hands were clasped together pressed firmly against his lips, repeating her name over and over, as if willing her to hear him.

It was torture watching her fight for her life and not being able to do anything except stand there and say her name and beg God to please spare her, not only for her sake but for his as well. Bags of blood were replaced twice already while they had stood there. He felt his own body jolt every time hers did from the shock sent through her to try to restart her heart. The word clear was heard four times before Steve saw one of the doctors reach behind him and pick up what looked like a jig saw. The movement in the room shifted as the paddle machine was pushed away into the corner. He knew what the tool was that the doctor held, they were going to cut her chest open to get directly to her heart; it was the last resort. He stared at her face that had a tube coming out of her mouth as a nurse squeezed a bag connected to it, breathing for her. His line of sight was replaced by a curtain that a nurse pulled in front of the door, blocking the view as they cracked her chest. Now all he could do was just listen.

The voices in the room sounded commanding yet calm, considering the circumstance and stress they were under. He closed his eyes praying he wouldn't hear those dreaded words, '_Time of death.'_

Danny never wavered from his side, keeping a strong hand on his shoulder as they waited together, both of them silently pleading with a higher power to give her strength and spare her. Danny prayed to the only God he knew. The one he was taught as a child that came from the bible. While Steve prayed to the Hawaiian Akua's the ones he was drawn to and felt the closest too at the moment.

Things began to settle in the room as two more doctors went in and then a few minutes later the curtain opened and they wheeled her out. The nurse at the head of her bed continued to squeeze the bag that fed air to her lungs. A white blanket covered her body and the sterile cloth that exposed the chest cavity. Carly looked pale but had more color than she had before they got there. That was good sign he told himself.

"Where are you taking her?" Steve asked as they passed.

They ignored his question, knowing the ER doctor in charge would answer it.

Steve watched him pull his blood stained gloves and smock off, dropping them into a container before coming out. He stood before them, "I'm Dr. Lyle."

There was no polite hand greeting; it just wasn't called for. He went right into her diagnosis and current condition.

"Carly suffered damage to her left kidney, we don't know whether it will have to come out until we can go in and get a better look. She has thirteen puncture wounds in all but only two did serious damage. The other wound was to her stomach, not as severe as the kidney but caused massive internal bleeding which caused her to go into cardiac arrest. We had to crack her chest and do internal massaging of her heart. We were able to get a good rhythm going, however; the loss of blood flow to her brain is a concern to us. She suffered a stroke while on route to the hospital and we won't know the damage of that either, probably not until she wakes up. Our main goal was to get her stable enough for surgery so we can repair the stomach and deal with the kidney."

Steve felt like time was standing still as he listened to him rattle off her condition. Each one more life threatening than the next, hoping he would just shut up and stop talking.

"They're taking her up to the third floor for surgery. When you come out of the elevators there's a room off to the right, you can wait there for the surgeon. I don't how long she will be in surgery, but Dr. Caldwell is the best doctor we have on staff. She's in good, experienced hands."

Steve nodded but it was Danny that spoke to him.

"Ok, thanks for all you did."

He nodded, motioning to where the elevators were and then walked away.

Danny compared him to a robot, but he guessed this was probably an everyday event in his line of work. Still, he hoped that he never became so frigid when having to explain to the loved ones the condition of the victim. He looked up at Steve who just stared off, trying to take everything in. He was about to guide him toward the elevator when one of the nurses came up to them.

"Commander McGarrett, Detective Williams," she said compassionately, knowing them from past experience and being reminded from the Paramedics. She could see the stunned look in Steve's eyes that she'd seen a hundred times before, moving her attention to Danny. "Here are some smocks for you to put on while you wait upstairs." She handed him two blue smocks and a two towels with a fresh bar of soap on top. "On the third floor across from the waiting room is a room labeled 'Private,' in there you will be able to wash up and either dispose of your shirts or there are bags in there too to keep them in." She was commenting on Carly's blood that covered both of them. "If you need anything else, the nurses on the third floor are very helpful." She smiled slightly; feeling for them, knowing Carly's condition was touch and go.

"Thank you," Danny said, seeing in her what the doctor lacked. He looked up at Steve, taking him by the elbow and leading him toward the elevators. "C'mon, lets go upstairs."

He said nothing but just followed him obediently.

* * *

Danny led him into the private room and turned the light on. It had a shower to the left and an oversized sink straight ahead that had a faucet that came up high and curved over for easy access to your arms. He knew this room was probably only there for the purpose they were using it for. He led him over to the sink and dropped the items in his hands on the small table next to it. He turned the water on getting it the right temperature. "Take your shirt off," he said, to him.

Steve looked down to take it off and saw the blood on his hands and shirt as if it were a shock that it was there. "Oh God," he moaned, "She's going to die Danny." He braced his hands on the sink and hung his head, sobbing. He'd seen death so many times, but this was unlike anything he'd ever experienced, because he loved her more than he'd ever loved anyone in his life

Hey!" Danny scolded. He pulled on his shoulder, forcing him to look at him, "Listen to me! If you give up now, she will die!" He knew it was harsh but he needed him to pull himself together. "Do you hear me? I need to get cleaned up and get Chin and Kono over to the house to get the investigation going. We need to find this guy before he gets off the island."

Steve's expression became hardened. "I'm going to find that fucker and cut his heart out!"

Danny's voice stabilized, "You let me worry about the ex. He's not going to get away. His biggest fear right now should be me. You need to concentrate on Carly. This is where you need to be when she comes out of surgery."

His expression changed to worry as his thoughts went back to her. "Yea, ok," he agreed, wholeheartedly.

Danny was pretty sure if he told him to bark like a dog because it would help Carly, he'd ask him what kind of dog.

Steve stared at him, trying to hide the grief that was all over his face, proving to Danny that he wasn't giving up. "She's going to be ok," he said, fighting back the tears.

Danny nodded, pulling up on the bottom of shirt. "Yea Buddy. She's going to be ok."

* * *

By the time they came out of the room Kono was already there, wandering the halls looking for them after being told they were up there. She greeted Steve with blood shot eyes, hugging him and reassuring him how strong Carly was. She informed them that Chin went to the house and the forensic team was already there working on tire tracks and finger printing.

"They found the knife out front in the grass, but your gun is gone from the nightstand." She filled them in, knowing he as well as the other three always-kept one there.

"Ok," Danny said, motioning with his eyes as if wanting to speak to her elsewhere and not in front of Steve. He led the way into the waiting room and sat Steve down. "I'll be right back."

Steve looked up at him, "I want to know what's going on."

"I know, and as soon as we get all the facts together, I'll fill you in. You know what your job is, let us handle this one."

He nodded, looking out the windows toward the hallway as if waiting for something to happen. "I guess the longer we wait, the better that is." He looked up at him, "You think?"

Danny agreed that was good reasoning. "I think you're right." He put a hand on his shoulder and gently squeezed it. "I'll get some coffee, because it's going to be a long night."

Kono bent over hugging him, "We got this covered Steve. Don't worry." She followed Danny out of the room and down the hall a few steps. When they were out of hearing distance she leaned back against the wall, "He looks terrible. I can't even imagine what he's going through," she looked up at him, "or you. Are you ok?"

He hadn't given himself any thought since it happened. "It was a mess Kono. She's in really bad shape. I mean, if she even makes it through surgery. It'll be nothing short of a miracle."

She started to cry again and they hugged each other, getting back control.

"Ok," she took a deep breath. "I'm ok. I'm sorry."

"This is going to be hard on everyone Kono, but Steve's relying on us to take care of things and we're not going to let him down. We're going to find this guy. I want you to go to the office and get him on the no-fly list first, and then check out the airlines to see if he is booked or already left the island on a flight, if he's on a flight, then contact the authorities of the city he's landing in."

She nodded her understanding, giving him her full attention.

"And then I want you to check out the car rental places, starting at the airport. If you find anything, alert the Port Authority."

She nodded again, "Got it. I'll let you know what I find out." She looked down the hall towards where Steve was. "You're staying with him, right. He shouldn't be alone."

"Yes. I'll let you know as soon as we hear anything about Carly."

They hugged once more before she jogged down the hall to the stairs, in too much of a hurry to wait for the elevator.

He pulled his phone out and called Chin.

He answered right away, "How's Carly?"

"She's in surgery," Danny told him, his voice somber. "Her stomach and kidneys are both damaged. She's in bad shape."

Chin sat down on Steve's couch. "I can't believe the amount of blood up there. This whole thing is unbelievable. How's Steve doing?"

"He's a mess. I'm going to stay here with him. I sent Kono to the office to start scouting the airport and car rental places. Can you have a uniform bring Steve and Carly's phones here? I need numbers. There are family and friends we need to contact and get them on a flight over here." He leaned against the wall, running his hand through his hair. "I'm not sure she'll make it out of surgery.

* * *

Steve sat and stared out the windows of the waiting room. The shock of the ordeal had finally settled and he was left with just sadness and an overwhelming sympathy for what Carly was going through. He loved her so much that just the thought of her being in any kind of pain was felt twice-fold by him. He didn't care what condition she was in when she woke up, he knew without a doubt he'd take care of her. He knew what a lack of oxygen could do to the brain and she had had a stroke on top of it. If he had to start over with her as if she were a child he would, and he'd make sure she came back even stronger than before.

That thought made him sit up in his chair. He felt a new wave of fear and heartbreak ripple through him. What if she was pregnant? It had been three weeks since they had made love by the creek and she wouldn't even have known it yet, but it could be a very good possibility that she was. He came out of his chair and headed to the door and then down toward the nurses station.

"I need to talk to someone about Carly Burke's condition," he said to the woman behind the counter.

"She's still in surgery sir." She stood up, realizing who he was after being informed from the nurses downstairs. "You must be Commander McGarrett. The doctor will speak with you as soon as he can."

"No, you don't understand! "Steve said, "She might be pregnant. There's a chance she could be. A couple weeks maybe."

She nodded her head, "I do understand." She spoke calmly seeing the panic on him. "They do an automatic pregnancy test on all female patients that require emergency surgery. So if she is pregnant, then Dr. Caldwell is aware of it."

Steve let out a breath, "Ok, I just…" he stammered, "I just thought…someone should know." The crippling fear he felt for her suddenly doubled, bringing on a whole new set of concerns.

He watched the nurse look beyond him and he turned around seeing Danny standing there. The emotional turmoil returned and Danny went about his duty once again.

"Steve, let's go back to the waiting room."

He wiped his hands down his face, catching the newest tears as they fell. He knew Danny was doing all he could but he felt a need to have the people around him that knew Carly as well as he did. "I need to call her parents and Jules and…" he cried when Danny interrupted him.

"I know. I got it all covered."

All he could see was his beautiful Carly lying on the banks of that river and looking up at him. He would never forget the feelings she gave him of security, happiness, but most of all love. He used that image now as a goal, something to look forward to in this horrifying situation. They were going to go back to that place together, even if he had to carry her. If he could just keep that image in his head alive, then he felt she would remain alive as well.

It was all he had.


	19. Chapter 19

Danny handed Steve a cup of coffee before he sat down. "I have to tell ya Buddy, Craig sure knows how to come through in a crisis."

Steve looked over at him, taking a sip of his third cup. "What do mean?"

"They couldn't get flights out of LA until morning so he chartered a private jet. They should be here in about five hours."

That didn't surprise him. "He's a good guy."

Steve looked at his watch. It was almost 1:30 in the morning and they still hadn't heard anything about Carly. They rest assured by their earlier theory that no news was good news. She was still alive, and every minute that went by he felt more and more confident that she would remain that way.

Danny nudged him on the arm; "I didn't know you two were trying for kids already?"

"We're really not, it was just this one time." He smiled out of the corner of his mouth at the memory. "Kind of a dare, you know?"

"Who was daring who?"

Steve chuckled, "I don't know, we both wanted it. I guess we were daring God."

He tried to imagine Carly pregnant. They hadn't really discussed the outcome of that day, deciding the chances were pretty slim considering her difficulties in the past. "She's not sure she can have kids all that easily. It had been exciting in the beginning, but I didn't want to bring it up again until we knew for sure. I didn't want to put that pressure on her." He looked over at him, "I'm sure she's not, it was just that one time."

Danny shrugged, "Maybe. You'll have plenty of time for that." But he knew that if she were it would be a miracle if the baby could survive the trauma.

Steve looked over at him thankful for that comment. "Thanks for everything Danny. I don't know what I would have done if you weren't at the house with me." He shuttered at the thought. "She would have died for sure."

He didn't need to be thanked for anything. He felt the buzzing of his phone, reaching inside his pocket. "You can thank me properly with a beer when this is all over." He looked at the number, showing Steve his phone, "Chin." He put it on speaker. "Hey, what do you got?"

"I need good news Chin," Steve said, sounding even more exhausted than before.

He looked over at Kono and then at the car. "Kono and I are at the airport. We found Allan."

Steve and Danny sat up in their chairs, glancing at each other. It was the news they were hoping for.

"Is he in custody? Did he confess?" Steve asked, suddenly feeling more awake. Carly was going to get the justice she deserved. Allan was going to die in prison; he would make sure of it.

"Kind of," Chin said. "He confessed into the barrel of your gun."

The news was surprising to both of them, but at the same time Steve was relieved. Having Allan removed from the earth completely would be a relief for Carly. There would be no trial, and she wouldn't ever have to face a parole board. In his mind justice was being served to Allan at the hands of the Akua's.

"What a fucking pussy," Danny finally spoke. "Should have known he'd take the easy way out. Where is he? He didn't hurt anyone else did he?"

"No," Kono jumped in. "We found his rental car in the parking lot. He's in it."

"Is there a note or anything saying why he did it to Carly?" Danny asked.

"No, nothing," Chin said. "He just checked out."

"I think I know why," Steve said somberly, "Their divorce was finalized yesterday. He couldn't let her go."

Danny looked over at Steve, "This case is closed. You ok with that?"

"Justice is being served as we speak, only not here on this earth. I believe that 100%. I'm ok with that."

"Amen brother," Chin agreed.

"Any news on Carly yet?" Kono asked.

"No," Danny answered, feeling his mood change, "nothing yet."

"We're going to get things cleaned up here and then come over there," she said.

"You guys go home and get some sleep," Steve ordered. "Come in the morning. You did a great job. I appreciate it."

Neither of them argued with him. They always took their orders from him without question and did so this time too.

"Promise you'll call if anything happens?" Kono said.

"Of course," Steve replied, knowing she and Carly had become friends over the past couple of months.

Danny hung up sitting back in his chair. "Well, he either felt guilty about doing it, or he was afraid of you and didn't want to go to prison."

"I don't care why he did it," Steve replied, "I'm just glad he did." He felt not one ounce of remorse or pity for Allan. It wasn't worth his time; he had Carly to think about instead.

* * *

Danny slumped down in the chair, resting his head on the wall, dozing on and off. Every few minutes Steve would catch him opening his eyes to see what was going on and then seconds later he'd be out again.

He on the other hand paced the room, stopping every once in a while to stretch. He even did a hundred push ups just to relieve some of the tension build up.

The waiting was torture. He didn't think anything could be worse than that, but telling Carly's parents topped it all. It took him several tries just to get it out. Hearing the silence on the phone and then her Mother crying was the worst of it. He wondered if they would forgive him for this, the same as they did for Karen. He couldn't help but have guilt over being indirectly apart of both of their daughter's tragedies. He knew what he was going through but couldn't imagine how they felt. He was glad he'd had a chance to talk to them over the past couple of months and this not being the first time since Karen's death. That would have been almost too much to take.

They had been planning a trip to the islands to visit them and he regretted that this was how they had to make their first trip. He only hoped it would be a happy ending.

Danny snorted in his sleep, waking himself up. He sat up in his chair, wiping his face off. He looked at Steve's amused expression. "What?"

"Nothing."

Danny's face turned serious as he pointed at the door.

Steve turned around seeing the Surgeon walk in. He felt the air leave his body, trying desperately to read his face. He looked in his late fifties but still had dark hair with only a slight sprinkle of grey. He was taller than Steve, which put him at a towering six four, give or take. His tanned face along with the height and the hair made him look distinguished.

"Are you here for Carly Burke?" he asked.

"Yes," Steve said barely above a whisper. Not being able to pick up good or bad from him. He could feel his heart beginning to pound. He didn't have to see Danny to know he was right there, standing beside him.

"I'm Dr. Caldwell." As with the ER doctor the greeting was short and to the point. "She's in recovery, but still in critical condition." He was the type of person that used his hands subtly while he talked, but not to the point where it took away from what he was saying. "She didn't lose the kidney, which is good. We got the bleeding under control and stitched it up. It'll take time to heal but it should be as good as new. Her stomach laceration was a bit more difficult to repair. We had to remove part of her stomach to make the incision line up the way we needed it to. It sounds more drastic than it really is. It's kind of like a stomach staple, if you will."

"So she's going to be ok? Can I see her? Is she awake?" Steve asked hopeful, after only hearing positive things from him.

He tilted his head slightly with an uncomfortable expression on his face, "I'm getting to that."

He didn't like the sound that. It was as if he was saving the worst for last. The insecurity was creeping back, he could feel it grab on around his body and squeeze.

"She suffered a stroke from the lack of blood flow to the brain. We want to do a CAT scan as soon as she's stable to determine if there is any permanent damage from that."

"Permanent damage how, to what capacity?" Steve asked, but deep down inside he knew what it meant.

"I wanted to put that out there, but not elaborate on it now. I'd rather wait and see the outcome first." He continued on with his diagnose, "The cardiac arrest also caused hypoxia, which is the lack of oxygen flow to the brain. This causes the neuronal extracellular sodium and calcium to decrease…" he paused, changing his pattern of diagnose, wanting to be clear in his explanation. "The lack of oxygen has harmed the neuron activity in her brain. In other words, its slowed to almost non-existence. To put it bluntly, it's asleep and the medical diagnose is that Carly has slipped into a coma."

Steve heard that word and it was like hearing him give her a death sentence. He knew nothing about comas except what he'd seen in movies or read in books. It always meant waiting for the person to wake up after months or years, or eventually the life support being turned off.

Dr. Caldwell saw that look of dread fill him and quickly reassured the situation. "This is not as dire as it sounds. I know the word coma can send you into a tail spin," he reached out taking Steve's forearm, trying to calm what he saw forming, "comas are not always permanent, as a matter of fact, 75% of patients wake up in the first week, and 20% in the first two to three weeks. Carly's pupils respond to light, which is a very good sign." He let go of his arm. "Think of it as her brain going on vacation. She's been through a very shocking and traumatic experience both physically and emotionally. She's resting and repairing."

Steve nodded feeling slightly better by that explanation. The doctor seemed confident she would come out of it, so he had to too. He needed to know one last thing before he left. "They said you did a pregnancy test. I know there was a chance she might have been."

Dr. Caldwell put his hands on his hips and bent his head, sighing. He looked back up at him. "Yes, she was, but she miscarried. I'm sorry."

Steve felt like he'd been punched in the gut. He'd talked about it with Danny but didn't realize it would hit him this hard. His eyes filled with tears as he mourned the tiny life that he and Carly had created together. It was just another blow in the nightmare that he just couldn't wake up from.

"There was no damage to her reproductive system," he assured Steve. "There is no reason why she couldn't conceive again."

Danny squeezed his shoulder, "Hey, Steve, that's good news." He encouraged him.

He nodded, trying to see the good in it at the moment, wiping his face with the collar of his shirt. "When can I see her?"

He smiled, "How about right now?"

He wasn't expecting that and his emotions switched in an instant, the same as they had over a dozen times in the last six hours. He smiled over at Danny, showing his pleasure in that.

"Come this way."

Danny held back. "I'm going to wait here and make some calls to let everyone know the update."

"Ok," Steve said over his shoulder, "thanks Buddy."

He followed him down the corridor that was quiet until they entered the ICU unit. The tone was still hush but the activity was busy as several nurses worked their individual area. The room was rectangle with the nurses' station in the middle and five separate rooms on either side, totaling ten ICU units in all.

Steve was led over to room six. The door was open and he hesitated going in, having the need to prepare himself first. As he entered two nurses that were working looked up at him and smiled. One was taping the IV to her right arm to keep it stable and the other was adjusting a bag on the side of the bed that had a tube coming out of it and running under the blanket, where he assumed it entered Carly somewhere.

His eyes moved up her body and he finally got a glimpse of her face. His mood changed again, barely recognizing the pale and swollen girl in the bed. Her hair was rolled up and tucked in next to her neck. The breathing tube that came out of her mouth resembled an athletic mouthpiece with the tube coming straight out the top and ran to the side, disappearing along the side of the bed, going into the ventilator. Both of her hands were bandaged up from trying to fight off the attack and each one was also being used to pump medicine and fluids into her body, they too seemed swollen. Her left arm was wrapped from the elbow to her shoulder. He recalled seeing gash marks there.

He swallowed the lump in his throat, trying to be strong in front of the other people in the room, when all he really wanted to do was just lie down next to her and put his arms around her. She looked so weak and frail it broke his heart. He walked closer to the bed as one of the nurses moved away, allowing him access. He touched her arm, gliding his fingers over it gently.

"The only reason we have the breathing tube in," Dr. Caldwell informed him, "is because of the coma. Sometimes the windpipe can become blocked and we just want to make sure she gets a good flow of oxygen, otherwise she'd be breathing on her own."

Steve nodded his understanding. He leaned over the bed and kissed her forehead. "Can I stay for a while?" he asked, brushing her hair back.

"Of course," he motioned to one of the nurses, "Nancy, would you please get Commander McGarrett a chair?"

He looked over at him, "Please, it's Steve," he reached his hand out to him, "and thank you for everything."

He shook his hand; "I wouldn't have had anything to work with if you and your partner hadn't kept her alive."

The nurse set a chair down next to the bed and the doctor lowered Carly's so he could see her. "Thank you," he said to Dr. Caldwell and then glanced over his shoulder at the nurse too.

"Stay as long as you'd like, and also," Dr. Caldwell patted his shoulder, "it's been known that coma patients can subconsciously hear people speaking to them."

He looked back at Carly in the state she was in; he had a hard time believing that.

They left the room, but the door was still wide open and in view of the nurses' station just outside. He stared at her face and gently caressed her arm. There was shuffling out in the hall but for the most part it was quiet except for the humming of the machines. Her lifted one of her bandaged hands and kissed it, feeling the whole night come crashing down on him. He pictured her trying to fight off Allan as he attacked her. The fear she had must have been horrendous. He wondered if she screamed his name, begging for help. He felt the same fear engulf him as he came around the side of the bed and found her lying in a pool of her own blood.

The fatigue and stress caught up with him as he laid his head down on the bed just wanting to be close to her, but was afraid to touch her. He thought about what the doctor said and stood up, leaning over so he could whisper to her.

"I love you Carly. I've loved you since the first time I saw you sitting on those bleachers all those years ago. I've always known that we belong together. I want you to rest and when you're ready to wake up, I'll be here. I love you so much." He kissed her forehead and sat back down in the chair and just held her hand, finally letting himself feel the sorrow and silently cry for her.

* * *

Steve woke up feeling a hand on his head as it slowly slid down his back. He sat up seeing Carly in the same position and then looked over his shoulder at Jules.

Maybe it was that she knew Carly just as well as he did and he could see his own pain in her eyes, or maybe it was just the mother in her, but the second he saw her the emotions overcame him so quickly he barely had time to stand up. She stood on her toes and hugged him as he buried his face in her neck and sobbed. She looked down on her best friend, but fought back her own tears, letting him have the moment, knowing he must have been in agony over the last few hours. She would be the strong one for now.

Craig came up behind her and put a hand on his head, hugging both of them. They were missing Jack who had decided to stay behind to care for the kids while Jules came to be with Steve and Carly. It was a hard decision for him, but they both knew she was the one to go.

Steve pulled away sniffing and trying to control himself. He felt somewhat embarrassed, a natural reaction for a man, plus, he was always the strong one, but at the moment he had no strength left and was beyond relieved that Jules was there. "I'm sorry," he whispered, not able to find his voice.

Jules bent slightly so she could see his face, annoyed by his apology, "For what, being in love?"

He looked at her and chuckled at that remark. She knew how to set him straight. He loved that about her. "Jack?" he asked.

"The boys," was all she had to say and knew he understood.

It was then that he saw Carly's mom on the other side of the bed. She had a hand on her daughter's head, gently rubbing her hair back and the other touching her arm. She spoke to her as if she were a child, reassuring her that she and Daddy were there and that everything was going to be fine.

He hadn't seen her in over sixteen years and the last time he had it had been at the funeral for her other daughter. She aged well and he could see the obvious strain on her from traveling over night, almost sure she probably hadn't slept at all. He could see Carly in her too, he'd never noticed it when they were young, but now it was evident.

"Steve."

He heard a familiar voice and turned to see Carly's dad standing in front of him, once again the memory of the last time he saw him came flooding back and just as that day, the guilt over his participation in this was crushing. He didn't know what to say, but refused to look away like a coward and stood and faced him, eye to eye.

Jason Burke had never met anyone before in his life that he respected more than the man standing in front of him. He didn't even know how to express to him the gratitude for what he had done for Carly, not only at the lake house but what he had done earlier that night. The only words he could find to describe him were none other than a guardian angel for his girls. If he hadn't been a part of their lives, he would have lost both of them. "I thought about you a lot on the flight over here," he said. "I thought about what I wanted to say when I saw you."

Steve felt his heart pounding but he refused to waver. He would stand there and take any kind of verbal beating or angry outburst that he had to offer. He had no right to deny him his justification.

"You are what most men strive to be and I know that someday when you and Carly have children, you will teach them the same values that you live by. It will be my proudest moment as a grandfather." He didn't wait for a reaction but touched him on the arm and moved past him to his daughter.

He had to let it soak in because he was confused for the first couple of seconds. He felt a hand squeeze his and looked over at Jules, who smiled, nodding her head in agreement with Carly's dad.

He swore he could feel the weight he'd been carrying over this slide off his back. It was the first time in the last twelve hours that he felt any kind of relief. He looked up then seeing Craig. He moved to him, shaking his hand and hugging him at the same time. "Thank you for stepping up and getting them here." He leaned back looking at him. "Seriously, you went above and beyond."

Craig shook it off, "I did what anyone in my position would have, so enough with that."

Dr. Caldwell came in and greeted Carly's parents, giving them a rundown of her condition. In the meantime Steve, Jules and Craig went out to see Danny.

"I can't believe you're still here." Steve said to him appreciatively.

"Those chairs really aren't that bad. I got a couple of hours."

"Well go home and get some more."

"Can I drop some luggage someplace, or does anyone need a lift?" he asked.

Steve scolded himself, forgetting to introduce him. "Danny you remember Craig, and this is Jules."

"I know," he said, smiling at her, "we met when they got here. I also met Jason and Mary, Carly's parents. Where is everyone staying?"

"With me," Steve said. It was an automatic reaction and then he paused, not even sure when he could go back there with everything that had happened. "Wait, I'm not sure we can."

"Yes you can," Danny said, "I talked to Chin and he had the Bio Chem guys in and they cleaned up. He said there is absolutely no trace of anything. They did a great job."

He was glad to hear that, "Ok then, my place."

Craig shook his head, "I've been to your place. It's good for a couple of people, but not all of us and I knew you'd say that too, so I made reservations at the Hilton for myself and I can get as many rooms as we need." He looked at Jules. "What do you want to do?"

"I don't know," she looked at Steve, "what do you really want?"

"I want Carly's parent's at the house, if they're comfortable with that, and whatever you want to do Jules is ok. They can have the master and I have a spare bedroom and my couch is perfectly fine for me," he held his hand up, "honestly."

She looked at Craig, "I appreciate your offer, but I think I would like to stay at Steve's. I can get meals prepared and help out that way."

Craig nodded, "I think that's a great idea." He turned to Danny, "We rented a couple of cars, so we're ok there." He stuck his hand out to him. "Thanks again for keeping us updated. It was a great relief to know someone was here waiting with Steve."

Danny shook it and nodded, "Glad you guys could make it here so quickly. If I'm ever in a hurry to get someplace, I know who to call." He motioned for Steve to follow him out.

They walked down the hall toward the elevators. "You doing ok?"

Steve shrugged, "She's alive, even though she's asleep and I don't know the full extent of her injuries, she's still alive. So…yea, I'm ok."

"Don't worry about work. I'll take care of it. I'll do the paperwork and bring it over for you to sign. I'll talk to the Governor and get him a copy of it too. I'll have it done before tomorrow night."

"Thanks Danny."

He went to turn and leave and then stopped, "Honestly, I didn't think she was going to make it. She's tough, and then when she was lying there dying, she made the conscious decision to tell us who did it." He shook his head, "Not only did she tell us, but she made sure we heard it right." He looked up at him, "I have a whole new respect for her." He raised his hand above his head, like he was measuring her; "I put her up here with Kono. She's the only other woman I know who could go to hell and back, telling the devil to F-off. " He walked away toward the elevators, talking to him over his shoulder, "You're kids are going to be like super hero's or some shit like that." He waved lazily as he got on the elevator.

Steve grinned, thinking the same thing about him. The respect he had for Danny was endless. He was a brother through and through.

He leaned back against the wall, running his hands down his face. He looked at his watch that read six forty-two. He guessed he had got about two hours of sleep while with Carly. He wanted to go back in the room but waited out of respect for her parents. He had yet to speak to her Mom but she had more important things on her mind than him.

"Have you eaten?" Jules asked, appearing next to him.

He thought about when the last time was he had eaten and started to laugh, remembering the night before. "Carly made this horrible fish last night for me and Danny." He laughed again at the memory and wanted to cry at the same time. "It's was so bad Jules, we could hardly even eat it."

"She's a horrible cook," Jules smiled.

"Danny and I went to get pizza and when we came home…" he looked at her and his smile faded. "We found her." He stifled the tears once again. "There was so much blood."

She quickly took his hand, holding it with both of hers. "She's going to be ok! You two will be back together again in no time, smiling and laughing. We'll all be dancing at your wedding."

He thought about the ring he had bought her wishing now he wouldn't have waited for that perfect moment, because in hindsight, every moment with her was perfect. "I miss her so much already. I just want her to open her eyes and smile at me. Then I'll know everything is going to be ok."

"She will wake up, Steve," she squeezed his hand reassuringly. "But," she sighed, knowing the crisis may not end there, "you have to prepare yourself though for a different Carly to wake up. Are you ok with that?"

"Yes," he replied without hesitation. "I'll take care of her. I'll do whatever I have to." He smiled just slightly, "Till death do us part. I married Carly a long time ago Jules. She's my wife whether I have a ring or a piece of paper to prove it, she's mine and I'll never leave her, no matter what."

She was pleased with that, knowing he said it out of love and not out of obligation. She just prayed that he wouldn't have to use it and that Carly would not only wake up soon, but be the same ole' Carly they new and loved. Mostly for his sake, because she knew he would stand by her and take care of her, but she also knew that it would break his heart into a million pieces but he would never say it or let anyone know he felt it. That scared her just as much.


	20. Chapter 20

The morning sun peeked over the hill of Punch Bowl cemetery that was in view from Carly's room at Queen's Hospital. She had been moved from intensive care four days after the attack to a regular room on the fifth floor.

Steve leaned against the window frame watching the sky turn from a frosty pink to light purple right before his eyes. He held his phone up to the view and took a picture, wanting to save this memory incase this was the day she woke up. He had done it every morning for the past eighteen of the twenty days she'd been re-cooperating, or as Dr. Caldwell put it, 'mentally on vacation.'

He'd taken eighteen photos and deleted seventeen, hoping each day he wouldn't have to be standing there at the window, waiting for the next sunrise.

They stayed at the hospital in shifts so someone was with her all the time. Her parents came in the morning and then Jules and Craig in the early evening and he was supposed to come at night, but he was usually there with Jules and Craig the whole time, not able to stay away. When her parents would come in the morning it was always hard for him to leave her, but he felt like he was intruding on their time with her. He wouldn't stay long after they arrived. Only enough time to fill them in on any activity from the previous night, which wasn't much. The routine was beginning to wear on him, on all of them.

He looked at the picture he'd just taken and walked over to Carly, still admiring the colors. He sat down, resting his forearm on the metal railing, holding the phone up above her face. "Look at this one. It's almost as pretty as you."

Of course there was no response, except for the machines that hummed. He let his arm fall on the mattress as if he were discouraged. "Wake up Carly. I want to keep this picture." He tilted his head so his cheek was now resting on his arm as he looked at her. "Please wake up baby," he sighed. "I miss you so much." His hand moved up her arm and then down again. "You know how impatient I am. Don't make me wait anymore."

Out of the corner of his eye he saw the phone shut off and the pretty picture disappear. He stood up and began his usual routine before her parents would arrive in the next hour or so. He switched the TV on to the morning local news and moved the blanket from her right leg. He started at her feet and massaged her toes, listening to the latest headlines as he made his way up to her ankle, then calf, then knee and then her thigh. He would then lift her entire leg and bend it at the knee slowly, trying to keep the circulation moving.

He looked up as the nurse came in, right on schedule.

"Good morning, Steve."

"Good morning, Kelly."

She went right into her job of checking Carly's vitals and wounds. "I heard we're supposed to get a thunder-storm this afternoon, a pretty big one."

He bent Carly's leg at the knee, holding it up with one hand and reached for his phone with the other, getting the picture. He held it up for her, "Calm before the storm," he smiled, showing her.

She leaned over from the other side, looking at it. "Oh my gosh, that's beautiful," she smiled. "That's a keeper."

He looked at it again, "Let's hope so." He set it back down on the bed and continued on with lifting her leg and bending it at the knee over and over as if she were riding a bike. "She's starting to lose her tan. That should piss her off enough to wake up."

Kelly laughed, "Did you hear that Carly. The sun is calling you. Time to wake up and go play." She opened the smock that tied in the front, exposing her wounds. Time was healing them but the scars would remain for a lifetime.

Steve set her leg down and helped her change the bandages. She handed him the tape and he tore off several strips equal in length and stuck them on the metal railing for her to use for the fresh gauze. He watched her squeeze the antibiotic ointment into her hand and then carefully apply it to each wound over the staples.

"Dr. Caldwell's going to take these out today," she said.

Steve nodded, hearing that from Jules the day before. He stared at her body, not seeing the wounds but seeing her. She was loosing weight and her ribs were more apparent than usual. "She's getting so thin," he sighed. "I'm not sure that feeding tube is working." He glanced up at Carly's face and the tube that entered her left nostril.

"It is," she reassured him. "She's getting the nutrients but it's not fattening. She's going to lose weight regardless."

"Maybe I should blend up some Loco Moco and give that to her," he smiled. "That's her favorite breakfast." He rubbed his hand over her hair, recalling taking her to a place up on the north shore for her first taste of it. They had hiked down toward Ka'ena point that day, stopping at Hidden beach where they ended up staying the rest of the day, skinny dipping in the water and making love behind the rocks on the beach. It was a perfect day.

Kelly looked up at him as he stared at Carly's face. In the beginning all the nurses had ogled over him, commenting on his looks and his body. He was the best looking thing that had come through in a long time. But as time went on, they didn't comment so much anymore on his looks as they did his loyalty and genuine love for Carly. It was touching and heartbreaking to watch at the same time. A couple of them, including herself, who had got to know him, were becoming concerned for him as well. He was losing weight at almost the same pace as she was. They had become so concerned in fact that they felt it necessary to convey their worries to the family, although Jules and Mary had already picked up on it as well.

* * *

The door opened and Mary came in first, going straight to Carly's side. "Good morning honey." She kissed her daughter's forehead. She then looked up at Steve who gathered his phone and put his IPad back in the case. "How was your night?" she asked.

"Long, quiet."

"Hmm." She looked at his face and could still see the handsome young man but the life in his eyes had turned sullen and now with the cheeks that looked sunken he was becoming a ghostly figure as well. "Steve?" she said, pulling Carly's covers down, knowing they would come in that day and change her gown.

"Yes," he replied, walking over to give Carly a kiss goodbye.

"When you get home, before you go to bed, I want you to eat the breakfast that Jules made."

He leaned over Carly, kissing her cheek, "I love you sweetie. I'll see you in a while."

"Steve," she said again.

"Ok," he halfheartedly agreed.

"I mean it. I'm going to ask Jules if you ate and I better get a, 'yes, he ate a lot,' not just a few bites."

He looked at her oddly, "What?"

"You haven't been eating properly. I want you to start taking better care of yourself."

"I'm ok," he defended, "I eat here sometimes and…"

"Steven!" she interrupted him with a sharp tone and short temper. "I have one sick child on my hands, I don't need another one to worry about. Carly's I can't do anything about, but yours I can!" She took the brush and began to comb Carly's hair. "I hope I don't have to argue with you over something so ridiculous as you eating." She looked up at him, "Do I?"

He stared at her, caught completely off guard. "No ma'am," he said respectfully. "I'll work on it." He'd never heard a harsh word come out of her mouth, or even heard her raise her voice. This concern caught his attention.

"Ok then, thank you."

He watched her hold a long strand of Carly's hair and comb the ends out until they were smooth. She never glanced back up at him or said goodbye. She spoke her peace and expected her request to be followed. He left the room a little irked, but then at the same time it was nice to know that she cared about him. He ran into Jason in the hall.

"Any changes?"

"Just your wife's. I think she just scolded me." He still looked a little bewildered.

"About what?"

"Food, and my lack of it lately. I think."

"She's worried about you. She mentioned it last night."

"She is?"

"She thinks you need to eat more and you're not taking care of yourself." He walked past him, patting him on the back, "A piece of advice from a man that's been married to her for almost forty years. Just do what she asks and we'll all be happier."

Steve smiled, "Ok." He figured she did have enough to worry about, but most of all he felt privileged that she was willing to included him in her realm of people to look after, therefore, he refused to give her any grief. He knew she was right anyway. He hadn't slept a full night since it had happened. He hadn't eaten a full plate of food, nor had he worked out once, which consisted of a swim out in front of his house. He almost did once, but at the last-minute he became too preoccupied with thoughts of Carly and the depression slid in, which he noticed could quickly consume any energy he had to spare from this ordeal.

It had to end soon. The emotional strain was pounding him down like a hammer to a nail. He was beginning to feel hopeless that she was going to become one of those 5% that never woke up, even though the CAT scan from earlier in the week showed no sign of bleeding that they could see, but Dr. Caldwell quickly pointed out that that didn't mean she was free and clear, it only meant that she hadn't suffered any permanent damage from the blood and oxygen loss in most of her neurological areas. What they couldn't see is the concern they were left with. And no one would know the outcome of that until she awoke.

* * *

Steve came in his house and set his stuff on the table by the door. Jules set a plate on the table for him after being informed from Mary that he was on his way home.

"Hi," she said, trying to be upbeat like she had been everyday that he came home in the morning. She had been a lifesaver for all of them, Mary might have been the matriarch of the group, but Jules was by far the one that stepped up and took care of everyone as if they were all her kids. He'd never seen her around her own boys but knew she must have been an incredible mother.

"Hi." He went right to the table and sat down. "Thanks Jules." The plate was stacked with three pancakes, bacon and sausage. He felt a hand on his shoulder as she set a glass of milk down next to his plate.

He reached out and grabbed her serving hand with both of his and gently kissed the back of it, looking back over his shoulder at her. "Thank you."

She knew he wasn't thanking her for the food, but for her time she had put in. She didn't need his gratitude, but accepted it by leaning over and wrapping her arms around his neck from the back. She and Craig had watched him everyday become more and more withdrawn and depressed; it showed both physically and emotionally. She squeezed him, setting her chin on his shoulder. "She's going to wake up soon, you know that right?"

He didn't answer but just nodded, not feeling it really at all. The hunger pains in his stomach were once again replaced with worry and stress. He missed her so much and there was nowhere to get away from it. He thought about her every second of the day and when he slept he dreamt about her. It was a constant turmoil of emotions that he just couldn't escape from. When he was with her the silence was brutal, but at least he could touch her. When he was away from her he was surrounded by memories of places they'd been as he drove to and from the hospital everyday, but when he was home, it was even worse. She was everywhere. He couldn't even go in their room anymore. Just seeing the bed reminded him of that sexual bond they had, that closeness that he would just ache for. And if it wasn't that then it was the memory of her lying on the other side of it covered in blood. He couldn't decipher which one hurt the worst, but that room by far held the cruelest memories of all of them, so he decided to just stay out of there.

Jules released him with a quick kiss on the cheek as Craig came down the stairs after using the bathroom. He came over every morning for breakfast and brought groceries or whatever it was that Jules needed for the day.

"Hey, Steve." He took the seat across from him. "I have to fly home tomorrow for a couple of days. Jules is going to go with me and then we'll be back on the weekend."

He had the fork in his hand but had yet to take a bite. "Ok." He looked over at her as she took the seat at the head of the table. "I know how much you must miss Jack and your boys," he looked at Craig, "and Marisa. Please don't feel like you have to rush back here. I appreciate everything you guys have done, but you should spend some time with your family. I feel bad that you are so far away from them. I know how that feels."

"Jack understands," Jules said and then smiled over at Craig, "and from what I've been told, Marisa is a hit with the boys." They were all surprised when she volunteered to help out while Jack was at work. She picked the boys up from school everyday, fed them, did the laundry and basically took Jules spot while she was away. When jack would get home, she went home too and then returned the next afternoon.

"Of course they do," Craig chuckled, "she's twenty-five and beautiful. She told me in the beginning they were all quiet around her, but they all seem to get along great now." He looked over at Steve, "And as far as the family part goes," he motioned to the two of them, "I'm an only child. You and Jack are my brothers and Jules and Carly are the only sisters I'll ever know. So, I want to be here."

"Me too," Jules nodded. She reached across the table and pushed the plate closer to him. "Eat! I'm tired of cooking and you playing with it more than consuming it."

Steve grinned at her, "I take it you and Mary talked," he said, cutting into the pile of pancakes with his fork.

"Yes, and I know she is kind and sweet like Carly, but you know me Steve," she gave him a threatening look, "I'm not so sweet and gentle. I'm making three dinners with three equal portions and putting them in the fridge before I leave tomorrow," she pointed a finger at him, "and I want your portions eaten when I get back, understood?"

He took a second bite of his breakfast, chuckling at her stern words, "Ok, ok!" He looked over at Craig, talking with his mouth full. "She reminds me of this drill sergeant I used to have. He scared the hell out of me."

"That's right Seal boy," Jules said, "I live in a house full of men. I have a strong kick and I'm not afraid to use it on your backside if I have too." She smiled as she got up from the table.

He and Craig gave each other a nervous look.

"Eat," Craig said, "I don't want to see that."

Steve popped one of the sausages in his mouth. "Me either."

* * *

Carly heard a muffled sound as if it were coming from another room through the walls. She felt weak, so weak in fact that just straining to hear what was being said was exhausting. She tried to open her eyes but even that simple move proved to be a challenge. She heard her Mother's voice as if a door had opened and she had come inside the room.

'Mom,' she said, but couldn't find her voice. She heard her Father speak and used what energy she had to open her eyes.

Jason sat next to her bed watching a baseball game, while Mary read a book.

He clapped his hands and cheered a little too loud as one of his favorite players got a hit. "That 'a boy!"

"Jason!" Mary said startled, "You scared me to death."

"Sorry honey," he pointed at the TV, "did you see that hit from Ichiro?"

"No, I'm reading."

"It was nice one, brought in two runs."

"Good for him," she said, focusing back on her book.

Carly opened her eyes and blinked several times from the bright glare. She could feel a gentle breeze in her lungs as she inhaled. It felt effortless to breathe. She had no idea where she was but knew her parents were there so she wasn't frightened. She was just so tired. Her eyes moved to the side and she saw her Father. He was sitting next to her in a chair, looking forward. She followed his line of sight and saw the TV on the wall. She looked back down at him when she heard her Mother's voice again.

"Jason!"

Carly followed the voice and saw her Mother leaning over smiling at her with tears in her eyes.

"Carly? Honey can you hear me?" she said.

"Hi sweetheart!" her Father said, leaning over on the opposite side.

Her eyes darted back and forth between them, feeling sleepy already.

Jason ran to the door and yelled down to one of the nurses that she was awake.

"Carly honey," her Mother begged, "please don't go back to sleep! Steve wants to see you so badly. Please honey!"

"Steve," Carly said to herself, and then as quickly as she awoke she drifted back to sleep.

* * *

Jules yelled for him at the same time he flung the spare bedroom door open. He came flying down the steps in a pair of navy blue sweats and no shirt. "Jules!"

"I know! I know!"

They both held their phones up showing the text from one of the nurses at the hospital. The text was precise and to the point. "_She woke up_." Not seconds later Steve's phone rang; the call was coming from Mary. Jules phone rang almost simultaneously from Craig, who had got the same text message.

* * *

They met up with Craig in the parking lot of the hospital. Steve could barely contain himself on the way there, finally using the sirens in his truck to by-pass the heavy traffic. It was illegal as hell but he didn't care. He called Danny first thing who let the others know.

They came out of the elevator and walked toward Carly's room. Steve pulled ahead of them as he went into a jog down the long corridor, not able to wait. Jules and Craig held back, letting him go in alone. He saw Jason and Mary on the other side of the nurse's station speaking with Dr. Caldwell before he went in.

He was surprised that they had already removed her breathing and feeding tube. This meant that she truly was awake. He walked slowly over to the bed, unable to wipe the grin off his face that spread from ear to ear. He couldn't wait to hear her voice that he had dreamt of so many times, or listened to on his cell phone from messages she had left that he never erased, but played back over and over during times when he was at his lowest.

He stood next to her bed and reached his hand out, slipping it under hers and gently squeezing it. "Carly?" he said, staring at her face that resembled an angel's. "Carly?" His hand brushed her hair back as she woke up, hoping he wouldn't see any kind of change, but only his sweet Carly.

She heard her name and slowly opened her eyes, looking at him as he smiled down at her. The first thing she saw was his eyes, they were blue and filled with tears as they stood there looking at each other. He smiled at her, yet the tears were real, which confused her. She didn't understand why he'd be crying. Had she done something to upset him? She didn't understand.

She looked back at him, but not with the same excitement he had been anticipating. Maybe he was expecting too much right away. This was a lot for her to deal with.

"I missed you." He bent down to kiss her and she surprisingly moved her head back away from him. He quickly relinquished the idea and stood back up. He noticed then too that she hadn't really taken his hand. Hers just lied still in his.

"Are you in any pain?" he asked her, wondering if she had been given something that was making her act this way.

"No," she replied softly. "Is my Mom and Dad here?" she asked, looking beyond him to the door.

"Yes. They're out in the hall." He didn't understand why she wasn't happy to see him. "Carly, what's wrong?" He thought that was a silly question after asking it, considering she just woke up from a coma. "I mean, I'm so happy to see you awake." He shook his head, bewildered, "Aren't you happy to see me?"

She looked beyond him again to the door, "Please go get my Dad." She pulled her hand away at the same time.

"Do you know where you are?" he asked, wondering if maybe she did have some kind of neurological damage that was affecting her.

She looked at him queerly, "I'm in the hospital. Is that why you're here?"

He put his hands on the metal bars of the bed; his expression mirrored the confusion that was circling his head. "Of course. I'm here because you are. I've been here everyday waiting for you to wake up."

Her expression suddenly calmed and she realized what it was about. He wasn't dressed like the other doctor, she thought, but maybe he was one. "Oh, do you work here?"

If she would have reached out and slapped him hard across the face, he would have been less shocked. He felt his heart drop to his stomach. The question was so sincere that he knew he couldn't deny what was happening. His mouth was so dry as he tried to speak he could feel it all the way down his throat, "Carly," his voice raspy, trying to swallow, "do you know who I am?" He held his breath.

His demeanor changed in an instant. He looked stunned. The blue eyes stared at her as if she should know that question. She looked beyond him again becoming frightened. "Please go get my Dad," she said, barely above a whisper.

"Carly," he gripped the metal bars for support, "just say my name!" He watched the panic in her eyes as she scanned his chest as if it should be there, like the nurses wore. He shook his head, "I don't work here."

"What do you want?" she whimpered as tears began to fill her eyes and she started to cry. Was he the one that did this to her?

His knees slightly buckled. He couldn't breathe. He'd never passed out once in his life, but as he stood there staring at her, he felt like a white sheet had been thrown over his head. It was as if everything was moving in slow motion. He stepped back, knowing he was frightening her. "It's ok," he held his hands up and stumbled as he ran into the chair. "Don't be scared." He felt sick. "I'll go."

He turned around reaching for the door, fumbling with the handle, not able to get it open fast enough. He felt like he was suffocating. He had to get out there.

* * *

Mary looked across the way and saw Craig and Jules standing outside Carly's room, but not Steve. "Oh Jason," she gripped his arm, "Where's Steven?" She walked quickly towards the room, leaving the two of them behind, praying he hadn't gone inside yet.

"Jules," she said breathless, "where's Steve?"

She smiled, "He went in to see Carly of course. He's so excited to see her we thought he should go alone."

"Oh no," she cried.

The door opened just then and he came out. She knew by the look on his face what had happened.

He ran into Craig, bumping shoulders with him but didn't stop as if he never felt it.

Craig heard him mumble something as he walked down the hall about five steps and then leaned back against the wall, bending over, bracing his hands on his knees as if he were trying to catch his breath.

"Steve," Mary caught up with him, "we didn't know you were here yet. We wanted to tell you before you went in." She put a hand on his back, trying to soothe him, "I'm so sorry honey."

He stood up, leaning his head back against the wall with his hands cupping his mouth. "She doesn't know who I am." He felt dizzy all over again and the nausea returned as well. "I have to get out of here." He pushed off the wall and then used it as a brace as he walked quickly down the hall. He saw the exit sign knowing it was the stairs. He didn't hear the others calling him from behind, telling him to wait. He needed fresh air. This was crazy, of all the things he had worried about; this one had never crossed his mind. He wasn't in the least bit prepared for her to look at him as if he were a complete stranger and worse yet the frightening way she looked at him.

For the last eighteen days he couldn't get close enough to her, and now all he wanted was to get as far away from this place as he could.

* * *

Danny looked back down at his phone, knowing he was getting close. He was tracking Steve's cell phone after showing up at the hospital and getting the grim news of Carly's condition and the even worse news of Steve's. No one had seen or heard from him since he had left the hospital and it had been a couple of hours. His truck was still in the parking lot but he was nowhere around.

He drove down Kalanianaole road towards Steve's house, following the blinking blue light that was Steve's cell phone. He glanced over at the person sitting on the curb as he drove by with the heavy traffic. "What the hell!" he yelled, recognizing his partner. He made a U-turn at the next light and went back around, making another one to get back on the same street and then turned his police lights on, stopping the Camaro just in front of him to block the traffic.

He looked out his side mirror waiting for the right moment and then quickly got out in between a break in the cars. He came up to him as he sat on the curb, staring at the ground. His face and T-shirt were soaked in sweat. It was at least eight miles from the hospital and Danny presumed he had run from there.

He took a seat next to him, "Are you lost?" he asked him, grinning at the display.

Steve looked over at him, his expression grim "Yes."

Danny's smiled faded, knowing what he meant by that. "I'm sorry."

"What did we do," he said to Danny, "you know? What did Carly and I do that was so bad that it's put us in this position?" He laughed, because he knew if he didn't he'd probably cry and he'd had enough of that.

Danny didn't know what to say. "It's not just you. She doesn't recognize Jules and Craig either."

It was as if he didn't hear him. "It's funny isn't it? I mean, when you think about it. It's comical the way shit just keeps stacking up against us."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is!" he said angrily. "And the biggest joke of all is that she has no fucking clue who I am!" He pushed off the ground and started walking down the street.

Danny caught up with him, reaching out and grabbing him by the elbow. "Where are you going?"

Steve pulled his arm away, "I don't know!" He stopped and looked in the opposite direction, speaking more passively, "I don't know." He really did feel lost. "I don't want to go home." He looked at Danny sadly, "And I can't go back to the hospital. So where do I go?" He felt that panic begin to overcome him that he'd thought he beat out of him from the run. "What am I going to do Danny? What am I going to do without Carly?"

He felt for him. The way he described it as being comical almost was, morbidly comical. It wasn't like it was a hopeless cause either so he tried to instill that in him instead. "The morning after the attack I asked if you were ok, and you said to me, '_she's alive, I don't know the extent of her injuries but she's alive, so yes I'm ok_'. Well, she's still alive so you've got two ways to look at this. One, it's not permanent and she'll come out of it and you two will be back to all that kittens and rainbows crap. Two, if it is permanent…" he shrugged, "you got her to fall in love with you once, do it again."

Steve stared at him, he opened his mouth to argue the point but then stopped, he was right. She was still alive and deep down inside her was that bond, that connection they had. It had been too strong to just disappear. He already knew what she liked, what she didn't like. He'd have to just start from the beginning, as if he were seeing her for the first time too. They had been too much in love for her to not feel something. All he needed was an ember and he'd get the fire going. "I think I can do that."

"Sure you can," Danny agreed.

Steve smiled, seeing a hint of hope in this gigantic mess. He looked at him peculiarly though, "Kittens and rainbows? What the hell does that even mean?"

Danny shrugged walking back to the car as he followed him, "I have no idea. Gracie said it once about this couple and it stuck with me."

Steve was about to get in the car when he froze, looking across at him, "What if she's really different now, and I can't pull it off?"

Danny sighed, "Well, then you're fucked, so you better make it happen."

"Kittens and rainbows," Steve groaned. "My goal is kittens and rainbows."


	21. Chapter 21

Steve walked down the corridor of the hospital toward Carly's room with Danny beside him. Craig was standing outside the door and opened it, notifying everyone inside that he was back.

He stood outside as Jason and Jules came out. He got a glimpse of Carly as she looked back at him just before the door closed. It was too quick to even decipher what the expression was. He couldn't believe she was in there and he was standing out here. He felt the room closing in on him again when Jason put a hand on his shoulder.

"Are you ok? We were worried about you, but Danny assured us that you just needed to get your head around it and you'd be back."

"I shouldn't have taken off like that, I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

Jules put an arm around his waist, "It was understandable. No one blames you."

He hugged her back and spoke to Jason and Craig. "How is she?"

Mary came out just then and he moved his body so he could see around Craig inside the room, but Carly was facing the window and he couldn't get a good look at her. "How is she?" he asked Mary this time.

She wiped her nose with a tissue and her eyes showed that she'd been crying recently. "She's scared. She's confused. She can't remember anything."

"She remembers you," Steve corrected. "She kept asking me to go get her Mom and Dad."

Jason looked disappointed, "She doesn't really. She knows who we are. She knows we're Mom and Dad but when the doctor asked her to describe the house she grew up in, the same one we have lived in for thirty-five years," he sighed. "She described your house, all the way down to the ocean in the backyard."

He shook his head, "I don't understand. How does she remember my house but she doesn't remember me or what happened in it?"

Mary's eyes started to well up again. "She doesn't even remember Karen."

"She asked if she had a husband." Jason said.

"What?!" Steve practically yelled, "Of all people, she remembers Allan?!"

"No!" Jules quickly corrected. "She just asked that was all."

He rubbed his hands over his face, knowing he should have felt something about that, but at the moment he was as confused as she was. "What did the doctor say about all this? How long does it last? Will she come out of it?"

"You're asking all the same questions we did. They took her in for a more thorough CAT scan earlier. We have an appointment with him in about an hour to discuss it and he said he'd try to answer any questions we had at that time. He wanted to consult with some specialists before he met with us. He did say he'd heard of this happening before to victims of extreme trauma but he's never experienced it firsthand."

Steve sighed, looking at the closed door. "I want to go in and see her."

Jason contemplated that while Mary spoke up, "No, not yet. I think it's too soon." She saw the disappointment in his eyes, "Just give it some time Steven."

He wondered why it was just him that was denied. The others had been in there to see her, why was he being excluded? "Did you tell her about me? Who I am?" he saw she and Jason exchange an uncomfortable glance between them. It didn't sit well with him.

"Yes," Mary said, "to an extent. We just don't want to push her too quickly. She has so much to deal with right now."

"To an extent?" he asked, "What does that mean? Does she know how much I love her? Did you tell her that we've known each other for seventeen years? Does she know that I'd do anything in this world to protect her and that I would never hurt her?" He felt Danny reach out and grip his arm as he became defensive. "Did you tell her that she felt the same way about me?"

Danny pulled on his arm as his voice escalated, "Hey, calm down! You're not helping the situation."

He looked at him, "I want to see her!"

"You will!" He let go of him and motioned with his hand for him to calm, "You have to see this from Carly's point of view too. She obviously has some serious issues going on. I agree with Mary, you can't just walk in there and start filling her in on her life story. Patience buddy, patience."

"I am going to see her though." It was more of a statement than a question.

Danny looked at the others, "Of course."

Jason reassured him. "We're not trying to keep you from her son. We're just trying to introduce things to her slowly. She is aware of you and we told her that she came here to Hawaii to be with you." He and Mary gave each other that look once again.

"You're not telling me everything," Steve complained, wishing they would just be honest with him.

Jules stepped up, "Carly's hesitant about seeing you right now. She didn't say she didn't want to see you at all…" she quickly explained, "I think she's just really nervous about talking with you."

That hurt almost as much as the scared expression on her from earlier. The last thing he wanted to do was frighten her, or worse yet, force himself on her. He was going to have to wait again. He rubbed the back of his neck, trying to ease some of the tension build up. "Ok," he reluctantly agreed, "I'll wait."

"Don't go anywhere because we'd like you to be there when we meet with the doctor," Mary announced. She gently rubbed his arm and then turned and went back into the room.

He looked inside and this time Carly stared back at him as her Mother and Father went in. It felt surreal to be standing there having her look at him as if she were looking at a complete stranger. He on the other hand saw her as only he could, his beautiful Carly. She would never be anything but that to him, no matter what.

Just before the door closed he saw a smile slowly emerge on her face, directed at him. He smiled back just in time before it closed. It gave him the extra boost he needed.

Carly looked at her Father as he came toward her. "He came back?"

"Of course he did."

She looked at the closed door, feeling bad for him. He had been so distraught when he had been there earlier. She felt guilty over not wanting to see him but she just didn't know what to say. She didn't know why she couldn't remember him.

'_Steve_,' she said to herself, '_Steve_,' she repeated over and over, trying to find a familiarity with him, with any of them. She looked at her Mother and knew inside she was her Mother. She did remember being young sitting on the porch eating popsicles with her. That faint memory helped, but the questions they asked her and the looks on their faces from her answers told her things weren't getting better. The wounds on her belly were excruciatingly painful. She didn't understand why they wouldn't tell her who the person was that did this to her and why? What had she done to make someone so angry with her? It all felt like a dream. She was surrounded by people who obviously cared for her, but the security she should have felt with them just didn't exist. It was almost easier when they weren't there, but when she was alone, the loneliness that engulfed her was staggering. It was a vicious snake that wrapped around her and she couldn't find the head or tail of it.

Jason sat next to the bed, seeing once again his little girl cower over what he could only imagine was going through her mind. He put his hand on the mattress. "I know this is all hard for you Carly. I can't imagine how confused and frightened you must be. But you have to trust the people that are in this room and the one's out there too, especially Steve. Please don't make him wait too long before you see him."

"Jason!" Mary scolded him. "Don't push her."

"I'm not pushing her," he defended, looking back at Carly. "He loves you and you love him too, very much. You told me that."

"I don't know what to say to him," she said quietly, fresh tears welling in her eyes. "How can I talk to him like I love him when I don't feel that? I don't remember how I was with him. What if I say something to make him angry or I'm not the person he knows." She started to cry, "I don't feel safe anywhere! I want to remember everyone, but I can't!" she began to get hysterical. "I feel like I don't even know myself or why I'm here! Please tell me why I'm here?" She pulled the blanket down, "Who did this to me?! What if they come here?!"

"He won't honey," her Mother cried, trying to console her as her Father did the same.

"He's dead Carly." Her father said, gripping her hand, "he's dead and he won't ever hurt you again. No one will hurt you."

"You're safe here darling," Mary said, smoothing her hair back wanting that terrified look on her baby's face to disappear. "There's nothing to be afraid of."  
"I don't want to see anyone," Carly panted, her eyes darting back and forth between them. "I want to go home," she cried, picturing the house by the ocean. "I want to go home!"

Mary leaned over hugging her as Carly sobbed repeating it over and over.

"I want to go home!"

* * *

Steve sat with Mary and Jason in Dr. Caldwell's office. He turned his laptop around showing a man on the screen as he Skyped the meeting.

"This Dr. Warenthal. He's head of the Neurological department at John Hopkins hospital in Baltimore. If you are not familiar with John Hopkins, it's the best teaching hospital in the country for educating students on the newest and most up to date medical practices. I contacted Dr. Warenthal because of his knowledge of Carly's condition. He's done several studies on the issue and I hoped he could shed some light on this diagnose for us."

The older man on the screen had a neatly trimmed white beard and brown-rimmed glasses that seemed several years out of date, but the brown eyes behind them seemed kind and gentle even before he spoke. The voice mirrored the eyes. "Hello. It's a pleasure to meet you." He used the computer in his own office back in Baltimore, seeing Steve, Jason and Mary through the live meeting.

Dr. Caldwell made introductions of who was who before they began.

"I'm very sorry for this tragic event that you are experiencing," Dr. Warenthal began. "Dr. Caldwell sent me Carly's file and I must say what she is experiencing in the aftermath of her attack is a textbook diagnose of Retrograde Amnesia were the patient is exposed directly or in-directly; and in this instance very directly, to a traumatic event that causes the brain to shut down certain areas. RA can occur without any physical damage to the brain. I did look over her recent CAT scan and did not see that the diencephalon or the temporal lobes were affected due to the blood and oxygen loss that Carly had during her cardiac arrest, which leaves me to believe she is experiencing psychogenic amnesia or psychogenic fatigue.

It often occurs due to a traumatic situation that the individual wishes to consciously or unconsciously avoid. The onset of this diagnose can be what they call the '_situation amnesia_', where Carly would only choose to withdraw from the single event of the attack from her ex husband, but in her case she has '_global amnesia'_, where she has forgotten long-term history. It's very rare but does exist. We've recently over the past few years begun the research to investigate the effects of stress and fear-inducing situations with the onset of RA and the global effect. The good news is that she can create new memories and the even better news is that the amygdala, which is a gland located deep within the temporal lobe can be effected by emotional stimuli, revoking the RA and bringing the patient back to not an always full recovery," he pointed out, "but over time a partial recovery of past memories."

Steve leaned forward in his chair, resting his elbows on his knees, "So this is temporary and in order to get her back to the life and reality she knows we should fill her in on her past? Is that what you mean by emotional stimuli?" he asked.

"No," Dr. Warenthal explained, "When someone is suffering from RA, their memory cannot simply be recovered by being told about personal experiences or filling in the blanks, so to say. They need what is called reminder effect or reminder treatment. This consists of re-exposing Carly to past personal information not just telling her about it. Just telling her has no specific bearings on her recovery; all she's doing then is creating new memories. She needs to remember on her own. Fortunately, memory loss can be and usually is recovered due to, '_spontaneous recovery'_. You might have heard of this recently because it is associated quite frequently with childhood abuse and the victim shutting down the event to avoid the painful memories. The same is happening with Carly, only her abuse was the attack and stabbing."

Jason reached over taking Mary's hand, "So it is possible she will regain her memory, we just need to reminder her physically rather than verbally?"

Dr. Warenthal nodded, "I do believe when she is ready and with the proper emotional stimuli, then yes, she will regain the majority of her memory lapse. The events of the night of her incident may or may not return, that will be entirely up to Carly. The brain is a magnificent computer, if you will, that cannot be manipulated as most people think. We can make minor adjustments here and there, but when it comes to the memory it's at the will of the individual owner. It's fascinating!" His expression showed his own enthusiasm on the subject, clearly showing why he was in the field of study he was.

Steve sat back in the chair, "She doesn't recall me or other friends that she's known for seventeen years. The only thing she seems familiar with is my house here in Hawaii, which she's only lived in for barely three months."

"Your home must have been very important to her, and regardless of what happened there she still must consider it safe and a source of security. That's a very powerful memory," the doctor smiled knowingly. "And so the spontaneous recovery has already begun."

The three of them looked at each other and smiled, feeling for the first time the slightest hope of her recovery.

Mary reached over and took Steve's hand squeezing it; "You must have made her very happy there."

He knew she was, because he had felt the same way. They were happy, ecstatically happy. After hearing the doctor clarify what she needed he couldn't help but chuckle over Danny's same diagnosis. He couldn't tell her they were madly in love once, which would go against what the doctor suggested. He needed to show her all over again just how happy she could be with him. He spoke to Jason and Mary both, "I want to see her."

* * *

Steve stood outside Carly's door and took in a deep breath letting it out slowly, knowing just how important this reunion was going to be with her. He had already startled her earlier and needed to ease her away from that and at the same time regain the trust she once had with him. If she didn't respond to him positively after this greeting then he wasn't sure what his next step would be or if she would ever respond to him. He took in another deep breath reminding himself once again that it was just Carly.

He opened the door and only went in halfway as she turned to look at him.

"Hi," he said, "Is it ok if I come in?"

Her parents had told her it was time to see him and she reluctantly agreed, knowing she couldn't put it off forever. She swallowed down the dryness in her throat and nodded, using the blanket on her bed as a kind of shield.

He came in and slowly walked toward her, letting the door close on its own. She looked nervous so he kept a distance, just wanting to make his presence known to her and to let her know she had nothing to fear from him. "Hi Carly," he smiled, "I'm not going to stay long. I know you're tired. I just want to know if you need anything? Or if there's anything I can do for you?"

She let the tight grip loosen on the blanket, not expecting that. She wasn't sure what to expect from him but had hoped he wouldn't try to kiss her again. She stared at him knowing she had a history with him. She was afraid that he would begin to fill her in on their past, maybe even intimate details, like it would suddenly make a difference on how she felt lying there. But to her relief, he didn't. He didn't seem to want to talk about it either, which in turn calmed her. "No, I don't need anything," she said quietly.

He nodded, "Okay." He pulled out a piece of paper from his shorts pocket. "I wrote down my cell phone number," he walked to the table by her bed and set it down, "just in case you need anything or…" he didn't know where he was going with that and felt he was repeating himself, "or whatever. You can call me anytime. If you need something." This was going to be harder than he thought, it already felt extremely awkward and his insides were churning and twisting. He was blowing it. She seemed tense as he approached her and it made him nervous. She was not at all relaxed as she practically hid behind the blanket. She wasn't responding the way he had hoped. "Okay," he said again, feeling heartbroken, cursing himself for not giving her more time. "I'm going to go." He gave it one last attempt, "Is it ok if I come back again?"

She could see the uneasiness all over him. He fumbled for words and it finally dawned on her how horrible it must be for him as well. She had been so preoccupied with her own anxiety over meeting with him that she never considered what he must be going through, until that very second. She saw it all over his face. He was trying to make the best out of a bad situation for her sake but the disappointment in his eyes from her lack of response was unmistakable.

He looked away from her as she just stared at him. He felt like he didn't belong there. She didn't answer his question, which led him to believe she didn't want him to come back. It couldn't have gone any worse. He turned to leave when she finally said something.

"My dad said you're a police officer." She didn't know why she said that but it was the only thing she could think of at the moment that she really knew about him and she didn't want him to leave without having some kind of conversation with him. She knew she owed him at least that.

He smiled, "Yes. I am." It wasn't the intimate conversation he was hoping for, but it was something so he went with it. "I have been for about three years. I actually work more for the Governor of Hawaii than for the regular police department." He regretted saying that, hoping she wouldn't see him as being full of himself, he just wanted to keep the conversation going.

Carly smiled, "That's an important job. You must be very good at it." She let go of the blanket all together and pushed herself up just slightly. She winced from the pain in her stomach and Steve instantly reacted to it.

He moved toward her, "Are you ok?" He took her by the elbow to help her. It was natural to him. She may not know who he was but she was his Carly and he loved her beyond words. Seeing her in any kind of pain made him react without thinking. "Here," he took the pillow above her head and placed it under her arm for support. "Is that better?"

"Yes," she said, looking up at him as he let go of her.

"Sorry," he apologized for what he felt like was an invasion of her space.

"It's all right. It is more comfortable. Thank you." He was attractive; there was no doubt about that, and tall. She thought he looked strong but his touch was gentle, the same as his demeanor toward her. She wondered if he was always like that. "I'm sorry that I don't remember you," she blurted out, "I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings," She felt like she owed him an apology as well.

God she was killing him. She laid there looking at him with so much sincerity in her voice. She was so beautiful he could have just stood there all day looking at her. He wanted to kiss her and tell her that he loved her so much and that nothing would ever come between them. Not even this. "Don't feel bad Carly, please," he said, "this wasn't your fault. Everyone here just wants what's best for you. We want you to be happy, so please don't let yourself feel bad by not remembering. It's ok. We'll all work through it."

Her father told her he was a good man; she could see that in him just then. She nodded, thanking him for that and also glad that she had met with him. It wasn't as scary as she thought it was going to be. "You can come back too," she said feeling slightly awkward, but not in a bad way, "if you want."

He couldn't contain the smile that came from deep inside over that invitation. "I would like that very much." He stepped closer to the bed and thought if he needed to ease her back into the familiarity of their life then why not start with the playfulness they always shared. He grinned mischievously, sticking his hand out to her, "I'm Steve by the way."

Carly giggled shyly, slipping her hand inside of his, "I'm Carly, nice to meet you Steve." She felt a flutter in her stomach, it was the first good feeling she had had since waking up.


	22. Chapter 22

Steve sat up on the side of the bed in the spare room and grabbed his shirt sitting on the chair. He slipped it over his head and reached down on the floor for his shoes. The nightstand clock read one thirty-three am. He couldn't sleep; his thoughts consumed by her, so he decided the only way to cure the craving was by going to the source.

He came down the same hospital corridor he had now for the last three and a half weeks, day in and day out and in some cases, night in and night out.

Nighttime is when he could sneak into her room and was really the only time he felt close to her. She still kept her distance from him during the day and their conversations were minimal. Her room was usually full with people and they seldom had a private moment. He was pretty sure she liked it that way. It was a good defense mechanism. He didn't argue or complain, he felt like he was already struggling to keep what they had together and rocking the boat was not something he was willing to risk.

"Hi Kelly," he said quietly, passing the nurses station.

"Hi Steve. I was just in there about ten minutes ago and she's sleeping like a baby. She had some extra pain medication. She started physical therapy today and was pretty sore."

"She's ok though, right?" he said, showing his concern.

Kelly smiled reassuringly, "She's fine." She motioned for him to go inside. "She was tired." She watched him go inside as one of the other nurses came up beside her.

"That just seems so sad to me," she said to Kelly. "How often does he come here this late?"

She shrugged, "Once or twice a week," It was more than that but she felt the need to defend him.

"Too bad. He's so hot," she grinned. "My God, if he told me I was his boyfriend, amnesia or not, I would jump all over that."

Kelly slowly turned and glared at her. "If I ever hear you say anything like that again about him or any other patient on my floor, you'll be cleaning bed pans and taking stool samples. Do you understand?"

She looked up at her shocked and then nodded, knowing she meant it. "Sorry."

"Don't you have somewhere to be?"

She nodded again and scooted away.

Steve carefully shut the door and walked over and stood next to her bed. Her bangs were growing out and hung just below her eyebrows. He remembered her mentioning that she needed to get a hair cut before that fateful night happened. He remembered so much about their short time together and it seemed everyday he was recalling more and more while she was hardly recalling anything at all. He still felt like a stranger to her. She was slipping away from him. He could feel it.

He thought again about that day they had hiked down to the creek and made love by the water. It was by far his fondest memory; not only because of the way she left him feeling that day but also because of the unspoken commitment they had shared by attempting to start a family. He thought of the baby then and looked down at her stomach where it had been. He wondered if things would be different between them now if the baby had survived and she knew of it. Would it change the way she felt toward him?

It didn't matter now anyway, he thought, their baby died, and their perfect relationship was on the verge of it.

He wanted to touch her so badly; even just holding her hand would have been rewarding enough for him. God he missed her, but not just the physical intimacy, he missed talking to her. He missed laughing with her. He missed her hugs that she would give for no reason at all except that she loved him too.

He couldn't take it anymore and very gently reached down, taking a handful of her hair and pulling it through his fingers, an addiction he'd been craving for so long. He leaned over, closing his eyes and brought it up to his face so he could smell it. He smiled, knowing she had been using the shampoo Mary had brought from home. That fragrance brought him back to happier times when she lied curled up as close as she could to him in their bed.

He sat down in the chair next to her, feeling once again the loneliness as she laid only inches from him. He stared at her face while she slept, getting his fill. He felt the late night fatigue beginning to set in and decided it was time to go, afraid he would fall asleep right there, and that he decided wouldn't be good at all, it could possibly set him back even further if she knew he came there in the middle of the night and smelled her hair and stared at her. It sounded strange even to him, but at the same time it gave him the relief he needed.

He stood up and whispered to her before he turned to leave. "I miss you."

Carly slowly opened her eyes, watching him leave for the third night in a row. It was the first time he had touched her. It was comforting. She almost opened her eyes when she felt his hand in her hair; but was afraid too. She didn't have to see him to know he was watching her. The distance she was keeping from him was becoming more and more difficult to undo. She didn't know how to play her part in this relationship. She knew what he wanted from her, and she was relieved that he never demanded it, wishing sometimes he would have. She would catch glimpses of him when his attention was diverted, asking herself what she felt, but she had a hard time answering. She didn't know. She knew he loved her though, which made it even more difficult, especially since everyone reminded her of it daily.

Why couldn't she remember their relationship? She had begun to recall small details here and there of others, but could never piece them together of when they took place or who they took place with. Jules had been a wonderful person for her to communicate with. She showed her pictures of when they were teenagers, some even had Steve in them but she couldn't remember anything about them. She missed her.

Jules and Craig had left the morning before. They had their families and said they would return when they could. She saw pictures of Jack but as usual, it meant nothing to her. The only person she had begun to recall was Karen. She had a dream about her four days earlier and woke up in a sweat. They were by a river and Karen jumped in and swam away. She ran beside the river trying to catch her until she disappeared. She woke up dripping as if she had been the one swimming. She knew she had drowned several years before and felt that dream was the reenactment of it. She cried herself back to sleep but didn't tell anyone the next morning. She didn't want to upset her parents or the others. It wasn't something that needed to be brought out.

She closed her eyes, thinking of him again, knowing he would be back the next day. He came every day. She just wished for one day he wouldn't.

* * *

Carly sat up as Mary handed her a cup of water.

"Mom," she asked, and then took a drink.

"What?" She took the cup back, and wheeled the tray table closer to her so she could paint her nails to pass the time.

Carly set her hand on the table. "Do you know that Steve comes here at night?"

Mary opened the nail polish bottle and looked at her. "Yes. I heard him leave a couple of times. I didn't ask but I figured this is where he was coming. What do you two talk about so late a night?" She grinned.

Carly shook her head sadly, "We don't. I pretend to be asleep."

She shot her a look. "Why would you do that to him?" she said irritably.

"I don't know what to say to him. I get so flustered and nervous around him."

"Why? It's just Steve, honey. He loves you so much."

"I know," she moaned, "and I know it's just Steve and I know he loves me, but to me he's a stranger. I mean," she sighed, "I like him, I really do. But what if I never feel for him what I used to? What if that never happens again? I feel so bad when he comes here. It makes me feel like an awful person. I sometimes wish he wouldn't come so much."

"Carly! Don't say such things. I know this is difficult, but I'm going to tell you again that he is a good man and you are very lucky that he comes around." She began to feel her temper, knowing Carly didn't understand, but it upset her that she wasn't even giving him a chance. "You be careful, because one day you'll wake up and he won't come every day. That's the day when you will feel bad, mark my word."

Carly wasn't sure what she meant by that. She turned away not wanting to talk about it anymore. Her mother didn't understand. It made her a little angry with both of them. The scars on her body were another reason she kept her distance. They were so ugly. She couldn't even look anymore when they changed her bandages. Who would want to see that? He may love her but the thought of being with him or any man and knowing that's what they had to look at made her feel ugly. She looked around the room wanting out of here as well. The physical therapy had started and she was hoping soon she could finally leave and go home, but wasn't quite sure where that was. They told her she had a home in San Diego but it was Steve's home that she remembered. She wasn't sure how she felt about that. What she felt for the house wasn't the same as how she felt about him. She wished she would just wake up one morning and all would be resolved. She didn't want to hurt him but the pressure everyone was putting on her to be with him was actually working in the opposite direction. He was the only one who didn't push. It made her wonder if perhaps he came in the middle of the night to be with the Carly he used to love and the one that laid in the bed during the daytime was only a girl that he felt obligated to visit. In a way, the idea of that brought her some relief.

* * *

Steve came down the corridor and noticed right away Carly's door open. He looked inside and they were changing the linens on the bed. Jason came up behind him drinking a pop from the cafeteria.

"She's over in physical therapy."

He turned around, smiling at the man he had come to know and respect. "Hey Jason. How's that going? I know she was pretty sore yesterday from it."

Jason shrugged, "Pretty good. They start slow and work up. He was working on her hands yesterday. The left one she still can't quite open and close all the way. I think today he's focusing more on her stomach muscles?"

"Who's her new doctor?" Steve asked, no sooner did he get the words out did he hear Carly yell out in laughter. He turned around and saw her in a wheelchair come screaming down the corridor being pushed by a blond person that was bent over making racing sounds. As they got closer to her room he stood up and pulled back, slowing her down. Carly held onto the side of the chair, laughing like she was having the time of her life. It was a sound he had missed. He couldn't help but smile at the display. He was enjoying it as much she was until the blond stood up, leaned over the chair and said something to her to make her laugh even more.

Jason watched Steve's expression fade as he observed the display between Carly and her new physical therapist. The camaraderie they had was undeniable. His natural blond hair and good looks resembled a young Robert Redford with a slight Brad Pitt femininity. He was as tall as Steve but not as sturdy.

Steve stood watching them. It wasn't the physical appearance of the doctor that bothered him; it was the playfulness they shared. He used to make her laugh like that. He felt an instant disliking to the man, trying to find a reason why, but knowing good and well why. He was in his place. He watched them from a distance as he spoke to the nurses behind the counter. Carly laughed again as he made jokes.

Jason leaned over, "That's Carly's new Physical Therapist. He's an intern that just graduated from Stanford medical school. Dr. Brian Man."

Steve looked over toward him, "Dr. Man?" he huffed. "Are you serious with that name?"

Jason rolled his eyes, "I know. I think he tries to play the part as well."

Carly smiled up at them as they approached. "Hi," she said happily.

Steve smiled back trying to stifle his disappointment over their playfulness. "Hey."

She looked over her shoulder at Dr. Man, "You know my Dad already," she motioned to Steve, "this is Steve."

The doctor came around to the side of the wheelchair, holding his hand out, "Hi, are you…" he looked back and forth between he and Carly, "Carly's brother?"

Steve shook his hand; looking at him peculiarly "No! I'm not her brother." He glanced down at Carly for her to give him an explanation.

She laughed, "He's not my brother. He's just a…" she hesitated, "He's a friend of mine." She wasn't sure how to describe him, but by the look on his face, she knew that wasn't the right one.

That description hit below the belt as if someone had sucker punched him. '_Just a friend_?!' Steve thought.

Carly looked away from him as he stared down at her over that definition of him. "We've known each other a long time." She tried to cover her tracks but it was too late, the damage was done.

Dr. Man sensed her uneasiness and tried to change the subject for her. He knew of her condition and assumed this was the boyfriend everyone had spoken of. His mistake in identifying him was innocent, but the response from Carly he couldn't deny was pleasing to him. She was beautiful and fun, two qualities he found difficult to find in a woman since moving to the islands. He bent over and locked the wheelchair, "Come on lazy bones, you can walk into your room." He took her by the arm and helped her out of the chair. "I still owe you that chocolate shake for those last five crunches. I'll bring it by later."

"You don't owe me anything." She could feel Steve staring at her. She had to admit that when they made the bet she was flattered that someone of his stature and good looks would want to spend time with her, but as she stood there now in front of Steve she felt for the first time a sense of obligation to him and just wanted Brian to be quite. She truly didn't want to hurt him and felt that she had. Her heart pounded trying to think of a way to resolve this.

Jason waited for Steve to help and when it was obvious he wasn't going to he went over and helped them.

Carly glanced up at him apologetically as they walked by, knowing both the comment from her and from Brian had been hurtful.

Steve stood in the hall and watched them help her back into the bed. He stared at the doctor's hands that were on her, knowing this person's job consisted of having his hands all over her body. He wasn't stupid either; the whole chocolate shake bullshit was just a way for him to see her outside of the therapy. The doctor felt something for her, but he really couldn't blame him. Everyone who ever met Carly fell in love with her. He had feared she had been slipping away from him but he hadn't felt the actual impact of that until just now.

Dr. Man came out, walking by him. "Good to meet ya."

He didn't respond but only slightly nodded, staring him down, getting his point across without having to say a word.

Dr. Man unhooked the brakes on the wheelchair and looked up at him. He felt he had crossed the boundaries and made a quick exit, feeling the intimidation.

Steve looked back in the room. He'd never felt so out of place before in his entire life. He didn't belong there anymore. He couldn't even bring himself to go inside. He leaned in the door and stuck his hand up, "I'm taking off. I've got some stuff to do at work." he lied. He barely glanced at Carly, speaking mostly to Jason.

He didn't wait for a reply from either of them, making his way down the corridor. He heard his name being called from Jason as he caught up with him.

"Where are you going? You just got here."

Steve turned away irritably, "What's the point?"

"Are you giving up already?" he said, grabbing him by the arm.

"Giving up already?" he snapped at him. "What am I supposed to do, Jason? You tell me? I'm here every day and every day she acts like I'm not. I can't keep coming around pretending like I belong here. I don't anymore. She doesn't want me here."

"That's not true!"

"Oh yea," he pointed toward the room, "go ask her! Ten to one she's glad I'm leaving." He backed away from him, "You think this is what I want? I love Carly. I love her more than anything." He pointed again down the hall, shaking his head, "But that's not Carly, and I don't want to be in that room anymore than she wants me to be."

"Steve," he said it like he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"I need some time away from here, Jason. And she needs it too. I just think there's too much pressure on her. Maybe that's why she's not remembering."

Jason hated what was happening, but he couldn't deny that he was right. Carly had made an effort to form a relationship with everyone except Steve. It wasn't fair of him to put that same pressure on him as they all were with Carly. "I'm sorry son. I think a lot of this was our fault. We didn't follow the doctor's orders and let her just get to know you all over again and see for herself. I think we tried too hard and it backfired on us."

Steve took a step toward him, "It's no one's fault Jason. I don't blame Carly and I certainly would never blame you. It is what is it and no one can make her feel something she doesn't."

He looked up at him, "Are you going to come back?"

Steve took a deep breath and let it out. He didn't want this discussion with him now, because to be perfectly honest he wasn't sure when he'd be back. "I'll never leave her." He felt his throat tighten. "She'll always be apart of my life no matter what, maybe it just won't be like it was for those three months, but I'll never leave her completely." He shook his head, "I couldn't even if I wanted too."

Jason nodded his understanding. "You do what you have to do, Steve."

He watched him walk down the hall and disappear into the stairwell. He turned and went back to Carly's room with a heavy heart for both of them. He'd been so happy and relieved when he and Carly had reunited, and over the last three months Steve had become like a son to him, no more than over the past few weeks. He wanted to tell Carly what a huge mistake she was making, but decided she was going to have to figure it out for herself. He wasn't going to meddle again. Steve was right, they couldn't force her to feel something she didn't.

He came in the room and she looked at him and then beyond him, seeing that he had actually left. "Did he leave?"

Jason sat down in the chair and picked up the remote from the TV, turning it on. "Yep." He said flatly but had a hard time hiding his disappointment.

"Was he upset? He seemed upset?"

Jason shrugged, "He had some important stuff to take care of. He has a life outside of this room you know." He found a baseball game and turned the volume up, wanting to stop this conversation with her. '_Let her sit and think about that for a while_,' he thought.

Carly looked from him to the door. She thought she would feel relived not having him there, but that's not what she felt at all. She tried to decipher her feelings but couldn't quite put a finger on it.

She settled down in the bed, staring at the TV, but he consumed her thoughts. She kept glancing over to the door, waiting for him to reappear, finally getting a grip on what she was feeling, it was plain ole' fear, but not in the normal typical fashion, it was a dreaded fear, a panic, an unnerving feeling that she had pushed him too far. She felt the impact of those emotions become full circle as she looked at the door again, wondering what if he never came back? Her heart began to pound and she decided that when he did, she would be different, and when he came at night she wouldn't pretend to be asleep anymore.

She heard her Mother's words in her ear, and she was right. She felt horrible, but worst yet, she couldn't keep her eyes off the door, anticipating his return.


	23. Chapter 23

Danny turned the TV on mute and got up to answer the door. Before he could get there Steve opened it and stuck his head in.

"Hey, what's up?!" he said just a little too loudly. He glanced around the apartment making sure he wasn't interrupting anything. "You alone?"

"Yea, why? What's going on?"

Steve smiled lazily at him, "Get dressed. Let's go out and," he stifled a burp, "grab a couple of beers." He came inside and stumbled as he closed the door behind him, reaching out and bracing his hand on the back of the couch. "Whoa," he laughed at himself, "steady now." He looked back at Danny. "What are ya standing there for? Go put some'em on and let's get out of here."

"Are you drunk?" Danny asked, noticing not only the physical aspects of it but the verbal as well. His words kind of flowed as one long one.

"No!" he walked over to the kitchen, staggering just slightly again and laughing over it, "Well not really." He opened the fridge and grabbed a beer out, twisting the top off.

There was another knock and Danny opened it, still having his hand on the door handle. He stared at Chin. "Am I having a party that I didn't know about? What are you doing here?"

"Chin!" Steve held his beer up to him. "Good timing."

"Steve texted me and told me to get over here ASAP." He looked over at him, "What's going on?"

Danny motioned toward the kitchen as Steve took a long drink of the beer. "He wants to go out."

"What?" Chin looked at his watch, "It's 7:30, why isn't he at the hospital?"

That question ran through Danny's mind as well. "Hey," he yelled over in Steve's direction, "why aren't you at the hospital?"

"What for!" He set his beer down on the counter just a little too abruptly and it began to overflow. "Shit!" he yelled putting it over the sink.

The two of them walked over to where he was. Danny took the beer from him. "You didn't drive over here did you?"

Steve leaned against the counter, stifling another burp with his fist, "No, course not. I took a cab. He's out there…" he pointed to no place in particular, "waiting for us." He smiled over at Chin, "Lets get outta here and go have some fun."

Danny picked up his wallet off the counter, handing it to Chin, "Go pay the driver."

He nodded, ignoring the wallet. "I got it."

"Hey, where's he going?" Steve said, trying to get past Danny out of the kitchen. "Is he leaving?"

Danny blocked his path, "What's going on? Why are you here and why are you drunk on a Thursday?"

Steve bumped against Danny and in any normal situation Danny would have stumbled backwards, but in this case Steve felt like he hit a wall and braced his hand on the sink as he steadied himself. "What the hell! Can't I hang with you guys without it causing an interrogation?"

"Sure, but normally this time of day you are with Carly, which makes me ask, why aren't you with Carly?"

Steve leaned back against the counter, bracing his hands on either side. "I just wanted a night off. That's all."

"You make it sound like it's a job."

Steve closed his eyes trying to fight off the pain that was approaching over this subject that he was hoping to avoid. It was the reason he had had his first beer that night to begin with. He felt dizzy and unsteady on his feet, opening his eyes back up trying to regain control. "It is work," he laughed, trying to make light of it, "hardest job I've ever had." He looked at Danny and laughed again. But his smile slowly faded not seeing the same response from him. The eagerness of wanting to go out faded as well. He just wanted to be around them for the night. They were his family.

Chin had come back in and stood next to Danny. Steve looked at the two of them, narrowing his eyes, trying to focus as the last two shots began to reach their maximum potential. "She doesn't want me there anymore."

"Did she say that?" Chin asked, stunned by his statement.

Steve shook his head, "No, I can tell. She doesn't want me around." He rubbed his thumb and index finger over his eyes, seeing two of each them, "I make her uncof…" he slurred, "uncomfortable." He looked at the two of them again, "Can I crash here tonight Danny?"

Danny and Chin looked at each other, both relieved the whole going out idea had worn off.

"Sure. You can sleep in Gracie's bed."

Steve stumbled past them, slapping Chin on the back, "Thanks for com'n over." He went down the hall into Gracie's room.

They both heard him collapse on her bed.

"You got a handle on this?" Chin asked.

"Yes. I've seen him this drunk before. He'll be out cold in about five minutes if he isn't already."

"Do you think he meant that about Carly?"

Danny sighed, scratching his head. "I hope not man. Because if that's true then tonight is just going to be tip of the iceberg."

"Maybe a couple of days off is exactly what he needs, Carly too. You have to admit this has to be a strain on both of them. This whole situation is crazy."

"I know," he walked with him over to the door. "You can take off. I'll talk to you in the morning."

"Alright…"

Danny walked down the hall and into his daughter's room. Steve lay on the bed with one leg hanging over the side. He decided to just let him sleep it off for the night.

* * *

_Carly laid on her stomach looking out the glass doors. They were wide open and she could hear the ocean in the distance. There were flowers everywhere, inside and out. It was so beautiful and so peaceful. _

_She felt a hand glide through her hair and gently down her back. She rolled over looking up at Steve. He smiled down at her in a way that fueled her need for him. She reached up, pulling him down to her lips. She felt his body against hers as the kiss intensified. _

She opened her eyes and took a breath as if she had been holding it. Kelly moved about the room doing her early morning duties before the shift change.

"I'm sorry if I woke you up?" she said to Carly, setting her re-filled water bottle next to the bed.

Carly stared at her as her heart pounded, still reeling over the dream. It felt so real like she had actually been in that place. She swore she could smell the flowers that hung around the door and filled the outside. But more than anything else, she felt the impact of the kiss. She wanted to close her eyes and go back there. She glanced around the dimly lit room trying to find some kind of evidence that he had been there. Sometimes he would bring her new magazines or flowers, but they weren't store flowers they were from someplace where he cut them himself. It dawned on her then that they were some of the same flowers from the dream.

She finally spoke up just before Kelly left the room. "Did Steve come here last night?"

She shook her head, "No, I didn't see him." She saw the disappointment all over Carly's face. "Maybe he had a long day at work." She had her hand on the door. "He'll probably be by this morning instead." She smiled reassuringly before she left.

Carly looked toward the window, seeing a hint of the sunrise that was beginning to light up the sky. She thought of the way he looked at her in the dream. It was tender, and she could only describe it as filled with affection. She put her fingers up to her lips, thinking again of the kiss and they way it felt when he laid his body down on her. She remembered then that it was she that had pulled him down. She wanted the kiss. In her dream she wanted him.

Her heart began to race even more as she wondered if that hadn't been a dream but an actual event that had taken place between them. Was she finally beginning to recall things about him? She closed her eyes, picturing him looking down on her. Her eyes flew open recognizing that look on him before. It was the same one he'd had when he first started coming to visit her, but her heart sank, because she hadn't seen it on him for a long time.

What she was feeling in just a few seconds of a dream must be what he was feeling all the time and perhaps what she had felt once too. It made her face the injustice she was doing to not only him but to the two of them. If this is how it once was and this is what they shared, then she wanted it. She replayed the kiss from her dream and decided; she really wanted it. She began to see him in a whole new light. A smile slowly grew across her face just thinking about him. She stared at the door and the smile slowly faded, wondering when or if he would be back.

* * *

Steve rolled over, opening his eyes and groaned at the same time. He looked around and quickly realized he was in Gracie's room. He laid his arm over his face, blocking the light, trying to recall the night before. It was sketchy and he had to think if he, Danny and Chin had actually gone out or not. The last thing he remembered was standing in Danny's kitchen with the two of them.

"Hey, are you alive?" Danny asked.

Steve slightly moved his arm so one eye was visible, "Barely," he replied in a low moan, shielding his eyes once again.

Danny came in and pulled the chair out from the desk and sat down. "I've got coffee going." He sat back, crossing his legs. "So, rough night huh? What was that all about?"

"What did I say?" He hoped he hadn't whined about Carly.

"Well, besides finally coming clean and admitting that I'm a better man than you," that got a smile from Steve, "you said something about Carly not wanting you at the hospital anymore."

He groaned again, a long drawn out one. "God Danny, I don't know what I'm going to do."

"So she didn't actually say she didn't want you to come around anymore, right? She's just giving you the cold shoulder."

"To put it brutally, thank you, yes."

"Well," he clapped his hands together, "here's what you're going to do?"

Steve cringed at the loud noise, "A little less enthusiasm please." He moved his arm, curious at his idea. "So what am I going to do?"

Danny leaned forward; grinning at him, "Stay away. Don't go over there. Don't call, don't write, and don't visit."

Steve rolled his eyes and laid his arm back over his face, "I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Because she's got some prick doctor sniffing around her."

Danny laughed, "You're worried about another guy? Jesus Steve, why don't you just go down there today with a dozen roses, sit by her bed and let her pet you on the head."

"Fuck you," he moaned.

"Using that word in my innocent daughters room, shame on you."

Steve sat up, leaning back against the pink headboard. "Alright, but what if she doesn't respond to that?"

"You mean what if she doesn't respond, period?" Danny shrugged, "Well then you know for sure, and you can stop hanging around for real like a dog."

He gave it about three seconds of consideration and nodded his head. He looked around Gracie's room that looked like a bottle of Pepto Bismal exploded in. "This room needs some more pink."

Danny shook his head, "I know. But I guess pink is the new 'in' color." He looked over at him, "Is last night going to be a peek inside of what will happen if she doesn't respond?"

Steve wiped his hands down his face, sighing loudly. "I love her Danny." He shook his head like he couldn't believe the predicament he was in. "I've tasted the sweetness of what it would be like to have a wife, kids." He looked over at him, "I've stepped over that line. I can't go back."

Danny nodded, knowing exactly what he meant.

"I told Jason yesterday that if she didn't remember me or want to be with me, that I would still have her in my life no matter what." His expression became even more despondent, "but I don't think I can do that."

Danny stood up smelling the coffee in the next room. "Well maybe you won't have to. Just wait and see what happens." He watched Steve scoot off the bed. He'd seen strong, confident women become flustered and shy around him. Even if Carly didn't respond he was pretty sure that he wouldn't be alone, but when you have your sights set on that one true woman, it is hard to go back. He knew that all too well. He didn't want him to go through what he did. He didn't wish that on his worst enemy. He hoped his little strategy worked and didn't backfire and blow up in his face. But at least he'd know the truth.

* * *

The day came and went without a sign of him. She went to her physical therapy class, barely speaking to Dr. Man, too preoccupied with hurrying to get it over with, wanting to get back to her room to see if he was there. But when the door opened and it was empty, the disappointment was heartbreaking.

It was going to be an even longer night. She knew she wouldn't be able to sleep, afraid he might come and go in the middle of the night and she'd miss him.

She thought it odd too that neither her mother nor her father had mentioned him at all. She was almost afraid to ask, fearing that they knew something and didn't want to tell her. It made her mind wander endlessly. The dream was the only thing that gave her any comfort throughout the day. But at the same time it made her miss him too. She finally broke down and had to ask.

Mary sat in the chair next to the bed, eating a sandwich, as Carly's dinner on the tray remained untouched. It had been almost thirty hours since he'd been there.

"Did you hear from Steve at all today?" Carly asked.

Mary tried to stifle her smile, delighted that she had finally brought it up; it had been driving her mad all day. "No, I haven't seen him since yesterday." She said it as if it was a standard occurrence.

Carly thought that was odd. "You didn't see him last night, or this morning?"

Mary shook her head, "He didn't come home last night, and wasn't home before we left."

Carly stared at her, "Where was he?" she asked almost breathless. Her first thought was his job, hoping nothing had happened to him.

"I don't know. He's a grown man. It's none of my business," she lied, knowing he had stayed at Danny's house. She had got a reply to her text to Steve from Danny.

"Mom!" she cried out. "What if something happened to him at work?!"

She looked up and was pleased to see the concern on her face. "Don't be ridiculous Carly. Danny, his partner would have called if something happened."

She thought about that answer, deciding that was probably true. Her voice grew even more concerned. "Where do you think he was?"

She shrugged, "I don't know," she looked at her puzzled. " Didn't you say the other day that you wished he wouldn't come around so much?" her expression became hardened, "Well your wish came true. Shouldn't you be pleased?" She knew it might be wrong to deceive her like this, but she wanted to give her a chance to feel that longing that he had. Pleased that it had finally surfaced. Steve staying away was probably the best thing he could have done, she thought. She couldn't help but agree with the old cliché`, _absence does make the heart grow fonder_.

"I didn't," she shuttered. "I didn't know it was going to feel like this."

Mary looked up at the saddened expression on her daughter's face. She set down the sandwich and stood up, caving in to her despair. "He stayed the night at Danny's house last night. That's where he was."

"Why didn't you tell me that?"

"Because! I wanted you to step inside his shoes and just feel for one day what he has for the last several weeks. A person can only take so much Carly."

She thought again of the dream and the way he looked at her, and how good it made her feel. That's all he wanted from her, to look at him the same way, or even to pay attention to him probably would have satisfied him. Her Mother was right about both things, she did feel worse now that he wasn't there and a person could only take so much, and she was convinced she couldn't take another day of his absence.

* * *

Steve sat at his desk at work still feeling the remains of the hangover. He sorted through some paperwork reaching across for his ringing cell phone. His hand bumped a half full cup of coffee that had been sitting there for several hours, knocking it over on the papers he'd been working on.

"Son of bitch!" he yelled out, standing up as it ran over the side of the desk into his lap. "Shit!"

The phone continued to ring as he tried to get it and save what he could of the paperwork at the same time. He rolled his eyes seeing Mary's name on the caller ID. He had been in a good zone, but was quickly thrown back into reality.

Danny appeared at the doorway as he was on his way out. He came inside grabbing the remains of some napkins that had been from their takeout at lunch.

"Shit. Shit!" Steve bellowed and finally answered, putting it on speaker. "Hi Mary," he said, trying to contain his anger. "What's up?" Danny leaned over trying to help him, mop up the mess.

"Hi Steve, um," she stuttered, "this is Carly."

Danny and Steve both stopped and looked up at each other. Danny stepped back, holding his hands out as if letting him know the plan worked.

Steve stared at him stunned.

"Are you there?" Carly asked, not hearing a response from him.

"Yes, yes," he said as Danny leaned over, nudging him to talk. "Is everything ok?" he asked.

"Yes," she put her hand over her heart trying to calm the rapid heartbeat and nerves that set in from just hearing his voice. She hadn't realized just how much she missed him until that second. "I was just wondering, um, if you were planning," she stopped and tried to rephrase, "I don't know if you were or not, but if you were going to come tomorrow if you could please bring me a magazine…or something to read." She rolled her eyes at herself, thinking she sounded stupid.

"Sure," he replied, pointing to Danny to leave as he began to silently gloat in gestures to Steve over his triumph. "Hold on one second Carly." He muted the phone; "Get the hell out!" he laughed and pointed to the door again.

"I'm a genius!" Dan yelled out. He raised his arms when he left as if he were standing in front of a crowd of admirers. "Thank you! Thank you very much!" He closed the door behind him as he left.

Steve unmated the phone, "Ok, sorry about that."

"That's ok," she replied, hoping he was still up for coming to see her.

"I can bring you those things."

"Thank you."

He sat back down, elated that she had taken the time to call him. The stress and anxiety that had been plaguing him suddenly slid off his back. "Actually," he said, "I'm about ready to leave if you want me to come by tonight?"

"Oh," she said surprised, not expecting that.

"If you're too tired…" he began when she quickly interrupted him.

"No! I mean, no I'm not too tired. Tonight would be good, if you're not too tired?"

Steve chuckled at their ridiculous over politeness, dancing around the subject. "I'll be over in about an hour or so."

Carly smiled, "Ok. I'll see you then."

* * *

Mary handed her a makeup brush and the compact powder from her purse. "You seem very excited that he's coming," she grinned.

Carly held it up and brushed the powder over her face. She held the mirror back to see the results and her smile faded. "My face is so thin. I look like I'm sick."

Mary took the mirror out of her hands. "You are sick. Give it time and we'll get you fattened up again."

She looked down at the scars on her arm from the knife wounds, feeling even more self-conscious. The surgeon had done a good job stitching them up, leaving only a small line for a scar, but nonetheless it was still there. They had still kept her in the dark about that whole incident. She had stopped asking questions, deciding that maybe she didn't want to know. There were other things that were more important to remember than that. She thought of the dream again. She wanted to tell her Mother about it, but it was almost too personal and too intimate to share with anyone. She kept it to herself instead.

"You look beautiful," Mary smiled, running her hand down the back of her head in a motherly fashion.

"Carly rolled her eyes, "I look like a stick figure."

"Nonsense," she scolded, gathering her things. "I called your Father and told him to stay home, so you and Steve will have the place to yourself."

Carly chuckled, "You make it sound like it's a date."

"Hmm," she replied, not wanting to start all over with that pressure again. "No, just a reunion between friends." She walked toward the door. "Good night honey. I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night Mom, thank you."

She watched the door close, anticipating the next person to enter. She turned the TV on trying to calm herself but the cross between excitement and worry that everything would go well was taking it's toll. Her hands began to sweat and she wiped them on the blanket, laughing at herself. She heard the door click and looked over as it slowly opened. Her heart began to race and a smile emerged, welcoming him.

"Well that's a nice greeting," Dr. Man said, coming inside.

She wasn't expecting him at all. "Hi."

"I was on my way out and thought I'd stop by to see if you needed any company."

Carly's eyes darted past him to the door, wanting him to leave before Steve got there. "Oh, well thank you but that's ok. I actually have a visitor coming." No sooner did she get the words out and there was a knock on the door and Steve stepped inside.

The only sound in the room was the door clicking close.

He couldn't fucking believe it. Was she playing some game with him! He looked from the doctor to Carly, feeling like a complete idiot standing there, holding the things he had brought her, but it felt more like he was holding his dick in his hand.

Carly read that look and her heart sank. She quickly tried to resolve the situation. "Hi Steve!" She tried to smile but feared he was going to leave, "Thanks for coming." The silence was only seconds but it felt like hours. All she wanted was Dr. Man gone. She looked directly at him, "My company is here." She then turned to Steve, pleading with him. "He was just leaving," she looked back at him, speaking sternly, "weren't you?" Her smile faded, giving him the final testimony that she had no interest in him.

"Ahh," he stuttered, "yes." He wasn't used to such a direct rejection, "I was." He pointed at Carly, "I'll see you tomorrow for your appointment." He turned and met Steve, "Hey, I was just stopping to see if she wanted some company, but looks like she's got that covered."

"Looks like." He swore if he saw him in that room again without it being on some professional level they were going to have a serious chat. He stood in his path to the door, refusing to move out of his way. Making him take the long way around him. A walk of shame so to speak.

Carly watched the display between them as if they were two bulls, facing off. Steve stood his ground and followed him with his eyes as he walked around him. The stare was confident and spoke volumes, warning the doctor he was playing in the wrong neighborhood. He still had his gun and badge on his hip and with the five o'clock shadow forming on his face it made him look even fiercer. She felt safe, knowing he would probably go to any lengths to protect them. He suddenly looked wildly sexy and incredibly striking.

She always knew he was handsome, there was no arguing that, but after the dream and this instance of him defending what he believed was his, he suddenly became like a Greek God standing there. She felt the sensation run down her body until it tickled her toes. How could she have not seen it before?

Steve felt a little boost in his ego as she clearly sent out the message to the doctor that he wasn't wanted. He gave her the benefit of the doubt, deciding she hadn't invited the doctor, he had just shown up. They were alone at last and the moment was becoming awkward so he made the first move. He walked toward her, holding up the plastic shopping bag in his hand. "I come bearing gifts," he smiled, letting her know all was good.

She pushed herself up, "I see that. I know I've lost track of time, but I don't think it's close to Christmas is it?" she giggled, narrowing her eyes at him. "Are you really Santa Clause?"

He set the bag on the bed next to her, loving her playfulness that he missed so much. "Ho, ho, ho." He reached in the bad pulling out a couple of entertainment magazines. "I know how you and Jules are. You can't miss the important news, like who's wearing what or who's sleeping with who."

Carly giggled, taking them from him, setting them on her lap. "I missed these since Jules left." She leaned over, trying to see what else he had.

He closed the bag. "No peeking."

"Ok," she laughed both of them forgetting all about the doctor issue.

He reached in taking out a bag of marshmallows, setting them on top of the magazines.

She looked confused, "Marshmallows?"

"It's an inside joke between you and I. I'll tell you about it later," he grinned, "It's pretty funny." He stuck his hand back in and stopped, "Close your eyes."

She did as she was told, but couldn't contain her excitement. She was having fun. She bit her bottom lip in anticipation of what he had for her.

He pulled out the small container and took the top off, taking an extra couple of seconds so he could just admire her. God she was beautiful.

"What is it?" she grinned, impatiently.

"Open your mouth," he ordered.

Again, she did as she was told, enjoying every second of it.

She felt the cold spoon and knew right away what it was. She closed her mouth around it, taking it all in as he pulled it back out. "Mmmm, ice cream," she purred.

He almost moaned himself over the sexy display, being reminded of how they used to share ice cream after having sex in the middle of the night. Most of the time they fed each other, sharing the different flavors. Hers was cookies and cream, which he gave her now.

She opened eyes, looking at him. "I love that kind."

"I know," he said confidently.

She opened her mouth as he gave her another spoonful and then handed her the spoon and pint size container. She watched him reach back in the bag and take out another one and pull the top off. She looked up at him as he took a scoop of Mint and Chip, offering her the first bite. She obliged, pretty sure he had probably been generous to her like that 100% of the time. She felt bad again about the way she had treated him. "You know so much about me," she looked down, playing with the ice cream, "and I don't know anything about you. I'm sorry for the way things have been."

He needed that. He didn't know how bad he did until she just said it. "Carly," he said gently as she continued to stare into the ice scream. "Carly, look at me."

She slowly lifted her head until she met his eyes.

"I don't want you to feel bad about that. I'll admit I was disappointed that things weren't moving in the direction that I wanted." He used the spoon in his hand to gesture between the two of them. "I missed this."

She grinned playfully at him, "What? Ice cream or spooning?"

And there she was, to his delight Carly had appeared. He wanted to kiss her. "Both," he responded, smiling at her as if she had just told him she loved him, that playfulness from her was just as satisfying to him at the moment.

She felt her heart skip as he smiled at her. It was just like the dream. The affection in his eyes, in his smile; it wrapped around her like a warm blanket. How could she have let him almost slip past her?

They finished off half the ice cream and watched a baseball game, chatting about current things rather than past events. The conversation flowed with a few laughs but overall by the time Carly slowly drifted off after taking her pain medication, they both felt they had broken the ice and began to form that bond that Steve believed had sustained them for the last seventeen years.

He looked up to say something and she was sound asleep. He turned the TV off and picked his gun up off the table, strapping it back on his hip. He carefully took the blankets and pulled them up so she was partially covered. He leaned down, resting his arms on the rail of the bed and looked at her until he had his fill. He was almost convinced that this nightmare was behind him. When he set out to get her to fall back in love with him he didn't have the first clue that it would be the biggest challenge of his life. But as he stood there watching her, he had to admit, not only was it going to be the biggest challenge, but also once again it was going to be the most rewarding. He wasn't there yet though and he knew now how quickly things could go against him. He should have followed his lead back in high school. Friends were always the best place to start. The rest he hoped would just fall into place.


	24. Chapter 24

Carly closed her eyes and laid her head back, smiling up at the sun. Her long black hair hung behind the chair, blowing in the breeze.

"Does that feel good," Steve asked?

He sat across from her as they enjoyed the courtyard on the terrace roof of the hospital. There were a couple of nurses eating lunch at the tables, but other than that they had it all to themselves.

She looked down her nose at him with one eye, "It's bright. I haven't been out in so long."

He took his sunglasses off and leaned across putting them on her. "Better?"

She smiled brightly at him as he adjusted his chair so the sun was at his back now. "Much. Thank you." She sat up at attention, "Do I look like a Navy Seal now too, like you?"

He grinned at her. "Bad ass."

He went to say something and then hesitated, thinking about her last statement. He tilted his head in a questioning manner. "How did you know I was a Navy Seal?" He thought for a second about their time together. "I never told you that. Did someone else?"

She stared at him, thinking about his question, asking herself the same thing. She finally shook her head, "No, I guess I just knew."

She took the sunglasses off and they just stared at each, both realizing at that second that she had retained some of her memory.

"Oh my God!" Carly gasp, "I remembered that!"

His face showed the same enthusiasm as he leaned forward in his chair resting his elbows on his knees, "How long was I a Seal for?"

Carly turned that question over in her head but finally shook her head, "I don't know. Ten years?" She asked, but knew she was just guessing. The disappointment displayed on her face.

"No, six," he corrected, "but that's ok," his excitement remained intact. "You remembered something, Carly. That's great!"

Her smile returned feeling pumped up again. She went to put the sunglasses back on and saw the scar on her arm. She gasped and pointed at him. "You have scars!"

He admired her effort, but all Seals had scars. Still, he amused her, "I do, more than one."

She leaned forward pointing to his left shoulder, "You have one there." She shook her head, "I don't know how you got it, but you have one there." His silence told her she might be wrong once again, but she felt so sure of it. "Do you…have one there?"

This revelation was even better than the first one because it was something physically on his body that she recalled. Whenever she would lie across his back she would always kiss it and tell him it was his good luck scar. He leaned forward and pulled down the collar of his shirt, revealing the two-inch long mark on his left shoulder. "It's my good luck scar."

She could see in his eyes what it meant for her to remember that. "Your good luck scar?" she grinned, looking at the mark on his shoulder, "Why would you name a scar good luck?"

"I didn't," he replied, "you did."

"I did?" she asked curiously. She blushed slightly, wondering if it were an intimate detail about them. "Why did I call it that?"

He explained to her again the details of being pinned down by snipers and how he got of it and how he got the scar, but he left out the part of where they were when he told her, hoping that she might recall the waterfall on Craig's lake all on her own. It had been a place that only the two of them knew of and had held something special for each of them. She had confessed to him that on the ride back from their first time there is when she had first begun to fall back in love with him. He admitted the same to her. The second time he took her there he professed that he would marry her someday, and even though she agreed and didn't remember it, his promise held strong.

She was just as shocked over the story the second time around as she was the first time. Only she was even more impressed by it this time since she really didn't know the extent of his training. She stared at him with her mouth open as he described the ordeal as if it were a walk in the park. When he was finished she was speechless. She couldn't believe the man sitting across from her could ever be apart of a war or a battle that involved killing or that someone would actually want to kill him. The past couple of weeks with him and mostly the last couple of days since they'd finally connected, she saw nothing in him that would allow her to believe it. His physical strength was apparent but the way he carried himself around her was always gentle, considerate and charming. She couldn't even imagine him angry, never once hearing him raise his voice. But as she looked at him, she somehow knew that if she ever needed that fierce, capable soldier that he would stand in front of her like a shield and protect her from anything.

"I understand now why I call it your lucky scar." She took the sunglasses and put them back on his face, "but maybe it was more of my luck than yours."

She was the only person in the world that could turn him completely upside down in the blink of an eye and leave him speechless. She had that power over him. She always had. He was more in love with her now than he ever had been. He was sure of it.

They walked side-by-side back to her room down the long hallway from the elevators. Carly took small steps, feeling the fatigue from being up for so long. She stopped and leaned against the wall.

"Hold on for a minute."

"Are you ok?" Steve took her by the elbow.

It felt better when she stopped moving. "Yes, it just stings when I walk for a long time." She bit her bottom lip through the discomfort, not wanting to seem helpless in front of him. "Dr. Caldwell said it's the muscles around the tissue that are healing. I just need a second."

He waited patiently seeing a bead of sweat form on her temple. She was in more pain than she was letting on. "Carly, let me grab a wheelchair."

"I'm ok now," she said, and started walking again, seeing her room only five more doors down. The pain started again almost instantly.

Steve followed next to her, holding her elbow as she shuffled along. He looked at her face and could see the strain. It was too much for him. "For Christ sake Carly." He bent over and scooped her up, carrying easily the rest of the way to her room.

As he passed the nurses station three of the regular nurses applauded. One called out, "What do you do for an encore?"

Steve laughed modestly, shaking his head at them as Carly squeezed his bicep, "Sorry, but that's the end of the gun show ladies." She waved over his shoulder as they entered her room.

He carefully set her down on the bed, "Why didn't you tell me you were in so much pain?"

"If I would have known you were going to bring the big guns out I would have told you on the roof." She smiled knowing she was embarrassing him, and loved every minute of it.

He leaned over bracing his hand on the opposite railing so he could look straight at her. "You like using that 'guns' phrase. You think you're pretty cute don't ya?"

She shrugged, "Yes, in a sickly, stick figure sort of way."

His eyes scanned her body, "Not true." He pushed off, standing up and reaching for his things on the table next to her bed, "You'll always be incredibly beautiful Carly, no matter what."

He didn't say it as if he were trying to compliment or boost her ego; he said it as if it were an actual statement of fact, which in turn was more of a compliment.

She was beginning to understand the pressure for her to form a relationship with him. He was special, and she could feel the benefits of that more and more every day. She liked being with him but dreaded the next couple of days. They were releasing her. She was well enough to go home and eventually her parents would be going home as well. She could go with them back to the mainland, or she could stay with him. The decision she had to make was the most difficult one yet.

Just the thought of being away from her Mother and Father right now was frightening. They were stability in a time when she felt so unstable. They were her strength. But, the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him again. She knew she could stay with Steve; it's what he wanted. He didn't say it verbally, but she knew. The decision she leaned toward gave her the most peace of mind or maybe it just felt safer and less complicated. Either way she couldn't shake the dreaded feeling that she would miss him.

* * *

Steve sat on the edge of the recliner in his living room across from Jason and Mary who sat on the couch next to each other.

"She's remembering more everyday," he said to them. "They're releasing her from the hospital day after tomorrow. I'd like to know what your plans are?"

Jason and Mary looked at each other, but it was Jason that spoke up. "We talked to Carly about this earlier this afternoon." He took Mary's hand as she bent her head.

Steve didn't like the look of either of those gestures.

"I know things between you and Carly have been going really well the past week, but…"

He held his breath over that one, sensing bad news.

"She wants to come back home with us." He felt bad, knowing what the impact of that statement would do to him; he could see it already. "I'm sorry son."

Steve shook his head, not giving up so easily. "This is her home." He pointed to the floor. "She belongs here."

"She doesn't remember this place," Jason reminded him.

"Yes she does!" he raised his voice in panic and then calmed, "She remembers my house. It was the only thing she really remembered when she woke up."

"The house maybe, but she doesn't remember it as her home."

"Then give her a chance to!"

"It's not our decision, Steve. It's hers."

"Yes it is!" he stood up and began to pace back and forth in front of the coffee table. "She was happy here! She'll be happy here again," he demanded. "Just give me a chance with her, that's all I ask." He stood in front of them pleading, "Please, she'll listen to you."

Jason shook his head as Mary remained silent, continuing to look down at her hand that gripped his.

"I don't know Steve. She's still so fragile and…"

"Please," he begged, sitting back down on the edge of the chair as his knees became weak. "Please don't take her." He felt his throat close. "If she leaves the island, she'll never come back."

"You don't know that," Jason argued.

"Yes I do, Jason," he argued, "and so do you." He felt tears stinging his eyes, imploring to the only other person who still had refused to look at him, "Mary," his voice weakening, "please."

She finally looked up with tears streaming down her face. "She's so vulnerable right now."

He put his hand on his chest, "You don't think I know that? Do you think I would ever do anything to hurt her?"

"No Steven, but…"

"Please Mary," he came out of the chair, kneeling in front of the coffee table, speaking to both of them, "You of all people. You know about the baby. We were going to be a family. Please don't take her. Two weeks, that's all I ask. If after two weeks she still wants to leave," he panted, "then I'll put her on a plane and bring her home myself." He pushed off the table standing up, "I deserve this chance with her. She does too."

Jason had to remind himself that it was Steve that saved her life twice, and now he was fighting as if to save his own. He deserved it, he was right. "Ok," he agreed, squeezing Mary's hand as she looked over at him. "He's right honey. This was her home and she was happy here. We owe it to both of them to give that life back to her." He looked up at Steve, "We'll talk to her, but I can't guarantee anything."

Mary wiped her face with the tissue and nodded her agreement.

He wanted to thank them, but he was too breathless to even say another word. His heart rate slowed as he began to calm down. He walked out of the room and into the kitchen, stopping once he was out of sight and leaned against the wall running his shaky hands over his hair until he cupped the back of his neck. He didn't know that Carly wanted to leave Hawaii. He didn't know why he assumed she would stay. He just considered this her home and thought she did too, but why would she, he thought? Jason was right; she really didn't know this place anymore than she knew him. He wondered if she would see this ploy from them as just another form of pressure on her to be with him. He hoped it wouldn't backfire like it did last time.

* * *

Steve carefully closed the door behind him and walked to his truck. It was almost two thirty in the morning and after that discussion with Jason and Mary he felt that need to get as much time in with her as possible, knowing he may not have very much of it left.

The nurse's station was empty as he slipped quietly into her room. It was quiet now that all the machines had been turned off. She was in much better health and only remained in the hospital those last couple of days so they could monitor her physical therapy and counsel her on her memory condition. Dr. Caldwell mentioned patients falling into a deep depression and some attempting suicide at the loss of their identity. He felt confident that Carly was coping well though.

Steve lifted the chair and set it next to the bed and sat down. The rail bars were gone so she could get in and out more frequently. He studied her face as usual, loving the free time when he could just sit and stare. He thought again of the argument from earlier, that uncertainty coursing through him. Were they doing the right thing? God he hoped so. He felt the night catching up with him and looked at his watch. He put his arm on the bed and laid his head down looking at her. Just a couple more minutes, he told himself, and then I'll go.

_Carly sat on the beach with her legs stretched out and her heels dug into the warm sand. She sat back on her hands and looked out at the crystal blue water as the waves gently crashed on the shore. There was no wind and no clouds. The clear sky disappeared over the horizon, blue on top of blue. _

_She watched them come out of the water and laughed at the little girl as Steve ran toward them holding the child as if she were flying. She squealed with enjoyment. Her jet-black hair-dripping ocean water and her tiny pink bathing suit riding up in the back over her diaper. Carly looked up as they stopped in front of her. He held her just above her face._

"_Give mommy a kiss," he said, bringing her in close enough. _

_Carly reached her lips up and felt the tiny ones connect on hers. It was perfect. He lifted the child up into in his arms and sat down next to her. _

"_I love you," she said, turning to them, but there was no one there. She turned quickly in the other direction; but they were gone. "Steve!" she screamed._

She opened her eyes, wide-awake in seconds. Her heart pounded and as she went to sit up, she saw him.

She stared at him as he lay with his head on his arm, his eyes closed. She relaxed back on the bed, carefully rolling on her side so she could see him better, but not wanting to wake him. It was surreal to see him there after the dream she just had.

He hadn't come in the middle of the night for a while. She wondered why tonight? She didn't care though, she was glad he had. His expression was peaceful and she wondered how long he'd been sitting there or how deep of a sleep he was in. She watched him closely for the first time, studying his face that was partially hid behind whiskers. She'd never seen him this bearded before. She imagined he had to shave everyday or his beard would be full in no time. His long black eyelashes lay still against each other, covering the blue eyes that she pictured smiling from her dream as he played with the child. She slowly reached out and touched his hair that curled at the ends, rubbing it between her fingers. The back of her hand brushed against his cheek and she could feel the abrasiveness of his five o'clock shadow. He was so beautiful lying there and from out of nowhere she was overcome by that wonderful serene feeling as he sat down next to her in the sand. In her dream she loved them both, she felt it as if it were real.

Maybe she was being too hasty in leaving. '_Maybe_,' she thought, still admiring him, '_maybe I'll stay just a while_.' She touched his face again, enjoying the feel of it when he opened his eyes.

He lifted his head, both surprised that he had fallen asleep and that she was awake. He didn't say anything, not sure how she felt about him sneaking into her room like that.

Carly smiled at his sleepiness, putting her hand on his arm that rested on the bed. "I was thinking," she whispered, even though there was no one around, "would it be ok if I stayed for just a little bit after my parents go home?"

He could hardly contain his pleasure over that, mainly because it was her decision. They wouldn't have had a chance to speak with her yet.

"Yes," he whispered back, "Of course you can."

"I don't know for how long," she said, not wanting to make any promises.

He shrugged, "We'll just play it day by day. No pressure."

Those beautiful eyes never lied. She wanted to tell him about the dreams she'd had, but thought it was still too soon to divulge such intimate details. She did like him though; she liked him very much and was glad she had changed her mind. "You like kids, don't you?"

He showed off his impeccable smile over that out of the blue question. She never ceased to amaze him. "Yes. I like kids."

She nodded knowingly, "I thought so."

Yes, she liked him very much.


	25. Chapter 25

Steve stood outside Carly's room as Dr. Caldwell discussed some last minute details with her. He turned to Kelly the nurse that had been with them through it all.

"Thank you for everything. You're very good at your job."

She smiled, putting an arm around his waist as he put one over her shoulder and squeezed his appreciation. "I'm sure I'll see you two again in a couple of years down at the maternity ward."

Steve laughed, "We'll see."

Carly came out into the corridor being pushed in a wheelchair by Jason; she stood up and said goodbye to everyone that had cared for her and had come up to see her off.

Steve stood off to the side watching all the people who had come to love and admire her. She had that quality about her. Everyone loved Carly once they got to know her. They always had.

* * *

He opened up his front door and let her enter first. It was like Déjà vu. He had done the same thing only four months earlier when she had entered it for the first time after coming back from California with him. In a way she was entering for the first time again.

She smiled at him as she walked past, peeking inside just before she entered as if there was something lurking beyond the threshold. She was apprehensive, knowing this place but at the same time not really knowing it at all. The layout was just as she had dreamed or remembered? She wasn't sure which. She went straight to the kitchen, looking out the window at the ocean and the flowers. The others came in and she turned around to them.

"There's two bedrooms upstairs, one has glass doors that lead to a deck and there are flowers all around it, right?" She recalled her dream where they had kissed.

"There are two bedrooms and glass doors but no flowers on the door, or the lanai." Steve pointed to the backyard. "There are plenty outside though. If you want I can cut some and bring them in?"

She shook her head, a little disappointed. "No, I just thought…I had a dream…" she cut herself off. "Never mind. You don't have to do that."

She followed him upstairs as Mary began to prepare an early dinner and Jason sat at his laptop confirming their reservations for the next morning's flight home.

Steve stopped at the first bedroom. "I've slept in here since Jules left." He continued down to their room feeling a little apprehensive; one, because this was their room and they had shared so many intimate moments as well as personal talks, but he was also worried that she might have a memory of the stabbing. He entered first, watching her closely for any sign of either.

She looked at the bed first, recalling the dream, feeling her face flush. Her parents' suitcases were packed and sitting on the floor, still open for any last minute items. Steve walked past her to the French doors and opened them out to the lanai.

"That's so beautiful," she exclaimed, coming around the bed and out the door with him.

He was pleased that she never once looked down at the spot where he had found her bloodied and dying. The memory was hard enough for him; he hoped it was the one she would never recall. "You said you dreamt there were flowers," he asked.

She put her hands on the railings, looking down at the row of pink, yellow and white hibiscus that lined either side of his backyard all the way to the beach. "Yes, but they were all over the lanai and draped over the door," she looked at him, "I could smell them in my dream." She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, "just like now."

He stared at her, feeling that déjà vu all over again. He wished he could kiss her and pull her back to his bed like he had done the last time. He missed being with her so much, and being this close to her and not being able to touch her was torture. He was glad she didn't recall the painful memories, but couldn't deny that he was disappointed that she didn't recall the good ones either. Still, he thought, she had dreamt of this room and it seemed to be a pleasant one, so that was a good sign.

Carly turned around and leaned against the railing looking into the bedroom at the bed. She pictured the two of them lying there like they had in her dream. She knew she had lived here for three months before 'it' happened, knowing they shared that bed and more than anything else she knew they had made love probably countless times in it. It was surreal to know it, but not remember it. At one time she knew him intimately in probably every sense of the word, and he knew her just as well. She looked up at him and he stared at her as if he knew exactly what she was thinking. She felt that stab of guilt, again knowing how difficult this must be for him.

"I want you to be comfortable here," he said, "there is nothing in this house that you should be afraid of. I want you to think of it as your own personal sanctuary." He put his hand on her arm, gently caressing it, wanting to reassure her. "You're safe her. There's no pressure and no demands."

She wondered if he had always had that gift of knowing what she was thinking and being able to sense what she needed when she needed it, because those words were exactly what she needed to hear and she believed every word he said. "Ok," she replied, "thank you." She looked down, feeling slightly awkward but said what she wanted to say too. "I want you to know that I understand how difficult this must be for you. I don't know what's going to happen in the future," she looked back up at him, "but I like you very much. I like being around you." She smiled shyly, playing with the bottom of her shirt, nervously toying with it. The way he looked at her was so damn sexy and unbelievably sensuous that she actually felt her knees weaken. The best part of it was that she didn't even think he was going for either of those moods; it was just the way he always looked when he was gazing at her.

"Day by day, Carly," he grinned, "we'll just take it day by day. Hell, " he huffed, "we were friends for sixteen years before anything really happened between us, so taking it slow is our motto."

She laughed, "Wow, talk about playing hard to get. You're going to have to lighten up some."

"Me!" he put his hand on his chest. "You were the one that was hard to get. I tried," he grinned, teasing her, "there I was off fighting for my country, trying to make it safe and you wouldn't give me the time of day." He walked back in to the bedroom, "I was so lonely," he whined.

"Oh right," she huffed, following after him. "I'm sure you were lonely!" She rolled her eyes. "Have you seen you? I bet if I really did my homework I would find out that you had a girl in every port around the world."

He glanced over his shoulder at her just before going out the door. "Carly! I can't believe you would think that about me?" he declared innocently. "I was a virgin up until a couple of months ago."

She roared over that one, gently shoving him from behind out the door. "Virgin of what? I may not remember us, but I can smell bullshit a mile away, and you Steve need a shower."

He turned to her, laughing at her comeback. He hated to think it, but he was really looking forward to Jason and Mary leaving in the morning. The last month had been a nightmare but he felt like he was finally waking up and could see the light at the end of the tunnel. He wanted to get back to that place when it was just the two of them, even if it wasn't going to be exactly the same as it was, he would have her all to himself once again. That he needed.

* * *

Carly hugged her Mother tightly as Jason shook hands and hugged Steve at the same time.

Mary pulled back still holding her shoulders, "I'm glad you decided to stay for a while. I think this will be good for both of you. You need some alone time to get to know each other again."

Carly nodded but still felt that tug at her heart over her Mother leaving.

Mary sensed that and put a hand on her cheek. "You'll be fine. You need to lean on him a bit, don't try to be so self-sufficient. You're not ready for that yet."

"I don't want him to see me as helpless. I can take care of myself."

"He would never see you that way." She smiled at her knowingly. "Besides, men like to be the protector, the guardian. It makes them feel like a man. God knows Steve's capable, he's been doing it his whole life." She patted her cheek, "He's good at it too."

"What if we don't get along when it's just the two of us?"

"No one gets along 100% of the time honey, but," she sighed, "you know you can always come to California with us." She almost said home, but didn't want to put that thought in her head that home was with she and Jason. The more time she had to accept this decision Carly had made, the more she came to agree that home really was with Steve. She hoped that eventually she would see it too.

* * *

Steve pulled up to the house and glanced over at Carly in the passenger seat. "I don't know how long I'll be. Are you sure you're going to be ok?"

She glanced over at him. "I'm not a child Steve. I'm perfectly capable of being home alone."

"I know," he corrected, "I was just hoping we could go to dinner tonight, but," he sighed, holding up his cell phone, "duty calls."

"It can't be helped," she reminded him getting out of the truck. "I'll make something."

"I don't know when I'll be home."

"Then I'll make something you can re-heat."

He smiled, liking that she wanted to cook for him, "Ok. I'll call ya and let you know."

"Be safe," she said smiling before she closed the truck door.

He liked that even more, wishing she would have said it with a kiss like she used too, but he knew that wouldn't be for a while yet, refusing to even acknowledge that it might not happen, because it would.

She went inside and waved to him once more as he backed up, making sure first that she got inside safely. She closed the door and look around the room. It felt odd knowing she was all alone. It was the first time in a long time that she had been. She wasn't in a hospital room so this was like heaven. The house was quite and she didn't know what to do first. She decided dinner would be a good start. She could at least get an idea of what to make for him, knowing it had to be something that could keep.

"Maybe pasta," she said out loud, "pasta keeps."

She filtered through the pantry and found a box of spaghetti, a can of sauce and some meat in the freezer. The canned sauce didn't sit well with her but she knew she could spice it up. She put the meat in the microwave to defrost and while waiting patiently for the timer she eyed the basket of clothes on the table that Steve had sorted through looking for socks earlier. She decided to take it upstairs and put them away. She basically was looking for anything to pass the time.

As she passed the living room she reached for the remote, turning the TV on, knowing Seinfeld would be on shortly. She had become a fan after being in the hospital for so long. The noise from it helped too. It was just a little too quiet for her taste. She went upstairs holding the basket and stopped before going in his room, feeling slightly uneasy now about entering without him being there. Somehow she felt she was invading his privacy, even though he had told her more than once that this house was hers' too and nothing was off limits.

She set the basket down on the bed and scanned the area, being able to really get a look and feel for it. The room was so familiar but any kind of memory here wasn't, except for the dream, she smiled over that thought.

She took a couple of shirts out and folded them going to his dresser, opening the top drawer first.

"Socks" she said. "He has a lot of socks."

She closed that drawer and opened the next one, rolling her eyes and grinning, "Hmm, underwear." She went to close it and then stopped, curiously pulling out a pair of black boxer briefs with a white elastic band. She pictured him wearing nothing but these and suddenly felt like the world was watching her as she blushed and dropped them back in, slamming the drawer closed.

"What is wrong with you!" she laughed. "Checking out his underwear! You should be in the mental ward." She opened the next one seeing shirts and set the two folded ones on top, closing it back up.

She walked past the walk-in closet on the way back to the bed and stopped, biting her bottom lip, feeling her curiosity and boredom get the better of her. She flipped the light on. The TV downstairs blared out the Seinfeld theme music but she hardly noticed, to preoccupied by the Navy uniform hanging in a plastic bag on the wall in the back of the closet.

That she could really picture him in. She could only imagine how incredible he would look in that. "A man in uniform," she said, un-zipping the cover. She smiled as his familiar cologne escaped the bag. She gently ran her fingers over the medals on the jacket, impressed by each one, trying to read them to see what they represented. They were beautiful and elegant, meaning so much more than she could possibly imagine. She thought about the story he told of getting the scar on his back and knew he earned every one of them from being so brave.

She zipped it back up carefully so as not to snag it on any of the material and made sure it was adjusted just right on the hook. It deserved respect.

She turned to walk out and noticed a white sundress hanging on a hanger. It was the only piece of female clothing hanging in the closet. Her things had been moved to the spare room. She insisted on sleeping in there, knowing he had given up his bed for the past month because of her, she wasn't about to take it from him again.

She lifted the dress off the rod and set it up against her. It looked like it would fit. She wondered who's it was, or if it had been hers' and she just didn't remember it. Perhaps it had been misplaced and not moved with the others by mistake. She ran her hand down the front of it, liking the soft material. Her hand brushed over the pocket and she felt something inside. She pulled the material apart, seeing a photo inside.

She stared at it, seeing herself and Steve in the picture as if they were strangers looking back at her. They lied on the ground and he had one arm stretched out holding the camera, taking the picture and the other one around her shoulder holding her close as she rested her head on his shoulder. Neither one of them had a shirt on, perhaps naked, she wondered.

She had an arm draped over him, looking up and smiling brightly. She looked so blissfully happy it made her sad. It must have been a fun day. She imagined they had had lots of those for him to be as faithful and attentive to her as he was now. It was her first glimpse into what life was really like for them before it happened…she didn't even really know what 'it' meant. She knew her ex-husband attacked her, but that's really all they said about it. It was never discussed openly, and she never pushed the subject either. She didn't remember him either and didn't want too.

She looked back down at the photo and did want to know more about this though. Where were they? Was it a special day, a birthday perhaps or a holiday? Or did they spend their free time lying in each other's arms and this was just an ordinary day?

She put the dress back on the rod but kept the photo.

* * *

Carly sat up on the couch when she saw the headlights of the truck pull up. She muted the TV and stretched her arms out in front of her. The picture laid on the table in front of her. He came in smiling, wearing a different shirt and his gun and badge fitted on his hip. She had seen him wear them several times but never quite got over just how masculine it made him look, even more so than normal.

"Hi," he said, closing the door and removing the items from around his waist. He set them on a table by the door.

"Hi, everything go ok?"

"Caught the bad guy," he said pleasingly.

"Good guys win again," she congratulated, "I hope you're hungry because I made a ton of food."

"I'm starving." He couldn't help but grin to himself, remembering her lack of cooking skills, but he was hungry and something smelled good.

She pushed off the couch feeling a little stiff in her abdomen muscles, standing up slowly. "It just needs to be heated up," she groaned.

He dropped what he was doing and went to her. "You ok?"

"Yes, just a little sore in my abs."

"Where's your medicine?" He had her by the elbow and scanned the area around them.

"In the kitchen, but I took some not too long ago. I don't want to become too dependent on them. You know?"

She looked up at him when he didn't answer. She followed his eyes down to the table as he stared at the picture she had found.

It was just a picture but the memory of that day and the significance of that particular photo was like a stab in the chest. She was pregnant then, but neither one of them knew it yet. They had taken it a couple of hours after making love by the creek that they had hiked down to. It had been almost two months before, but it seemed like a lifetime ago. He reached down picking it up so he could see it closer. "Where did you find this?" he asked barely above a whisper.

She felt that maybe she had made a mistake. "I was putting away some laundry and I saw the dress in your closet. It was in the pocket." She stared at him as he held it, his mood becoming bluer as the seconds ticked by. "I wasn't snooping, I just…" she started to say when he looked at her.

"Do you remember this day? This photo?"

She could see the hope in his eyes. She wanted to say yes so badly for his sake. She felt his disappointment and shook her head, "No." She looked back down at the photo with him. "Was that a special day?"

He didn't answer but wanted to tell her everyday was special. They always felt like they did in that picture. It was their life. They had decided to fully commit to each other that day by bringing another life in to their perfect little existence. He felt that loss all over again. She was standing right next to him but in a sense she was a million miles away. This photo just reminded him once again how much he missed her. After experiencing the comfort of that relationship, he'd never felt so alone over the past month than he had in his entire life. It was like an ache that just wouldn't go away.

"Can you tell me about it?" she asked.

He stared at her smile in the photo and they way she held him. He shook his head no. He didn't want to tell her. Not yet. How could he just blurt out to her that she was pregnant? That's what made the moment and the photo so memorable? They took it hoping it would be the first picture of her pregnancy; little did they know it would also be the last one.

She wanted to apologize to him but wasn't sure what for. "Steve, I'm sorry. I didn't know that…"

"It's ok," he assured her, "It's not your fault." He looked at her with so much pain and sadness in his eyes she almost broke down herself. "I just can't talk about it right now. Ask me some other time."

She nodded her understanding never seeing him like this before. He was the strong one, the soldier in the uniform, but as he stood there looking at her she wanted so much to hug the boy that looked so unhappy.

* * *

He sat down on the edge of the bed, still holding the picture in his hand. He could hear Carly downstairs in the kitchen warming up whatever it was she had made for him. He was supposed to be taking a shower. It was the only excuse he could think of to get away from her at that moment. It was so hard to stand there and not be able to confide in her. That had been one of the greatest thrills of being with her. She was so easy to talk to. He could tell her anything and was allowed to feel anything, always knowing it was ok. He'd never had that before.

He didn't understand why she couldn't remember this picture. It was such a significant part of who they were. It began to make him angry that after all they had been through he was still nothing to her. He wasn't sure how much longer he could play this game with her. Sometimes, like now, he just wanted to shake her and demand an explanation, but he knew it wasn't Carly he was really angry with, it was Allan. He never got a chance to confront the person that had broken into his home and destroyed his family. Carly was alive and he was grateful for that, but he'd never know the baby. They had both been so concerned that she couldn't conceive that even talking about it seemed to jinx it, so they didn't. He wished now that he had. He wanted that baby so badly and never even got a chance to tell her.

Allan took that joy from him and he damaged Carly so much that she refused to even acknowledge her own existence. He wished he could have got his hands on him for just five minutes, but the coward took that away from him too. Instead he was left to clean up his carnage and worse yet he had to do it with a smile on his face. It was wearing him down day by day. He'd dealt with pressure before, hell he'd been trained by the best to restrain from it, but this was unlike anything he'd ever experienced. Every time he thought things were on the up, something like this would pull him back down again. He needed her. He needed that friendship. He needed to wake up and feel her against him like he used too. He never knew just how much he needed it until it was taken away.

The picture became blurred as he felt that loneliness once again, that loss. He rubbed his thumb and index finger over his eyes, clearing away the self-pity that was creeping up on him, wiping it on his pants.

Carly stood on the stairs watching him through the partly closed door. There was something about that photo that had him so upset he couldn't even bring himself to talk about it. She wished now she wouldn't have found it. Whatever it was she wasn't even so sure she wanted to know the story behind it.

Her fingers gripped the handrail wanting to go to him, but not knowing what to say. She took the first step not letting that uncertainty stop her. She somehow knew that just being with him would help; maybe she didn't have to say anything at all. The closer she got to him the more right it felt.

She slowly pushed the door open and came in the room. She waited, not sure she was invited. He looked up at her startled to see her standing there. She didn't know what to do next so she did what her instincts told her and just sat down next him. Her arm brushed against his and she could feel it all the way down to her toes that curled from the sensation of it.

She reached down and took the picture from him, looking at it again from a new perspective. She just couldn't get over how happy she looked, but then it dawned on her. She was in love in this photo. That glow, the way she held him. She was in love.

She set the picture down next to her on the bed. He was there for her everyday. His first concern was always her well-being. If she wanted to get to that place in the photo she needed to be there for him as well.

She slid her hand around his arm, looking up at him. "Tell me about the first time we ever met."

It was the first time she had ever asked about their past. They always lived in the moment as if what they had before never existed. He was thrilled that she wanted to know. It was a good place to start, from the beginning.

"You were sitting on the bleachers at school with Karen and Jules," he said, reliving the moment that always made him smile, "they had their cheerleader uniforms on and you had just finished swim practice. You wore a pair of sweats, a T-shirt, your hair was still wet and you didn't have a stitch of makeup on."

Carly rolled her eyes, "I bet that was a sight."

Steve looked right in her eyes, "It was. I'll never forget walking up toward you and you made eye contact with me. I almost fell backward off the bleachers. I'd never had that happen to me before in my life, or since," he smiled. "After that day the six of us were inseparable. Jack and Craig were my buddies, but you, you were more like my best friend."

The tables had turned and she was enthralled now. "I was?"

He nodded, "We had fun together."

Carly grinned, "Jules said we had this crazy competition with swimming or racing or something."

Steve laughed, "I was always challenging you. I couldn't beat you."

Carly gripped his arm, stunned by that as well. "No way! You let me win."

Steve shifted so he could really see her. "No I didn't!" he put his hand on his chest, "I tried. You were fast. I couldn't beat you."

"Did that make you mad at me?"

"No!" he looked surprised, "of course not. It was all in good fun. Hell," he nudged her; "you were the State Champ that year. No one could beat you."

She liked to be reminded of that accomplishment. "I didn't tease you did I?"

"No, you were a good sport and a good friend. You wouldn't do that."

She scooted back against the headboard. "Tell me some more."

He laid across the bottom of the bed leaning on his elbow, resting in his head on his propped up hand. Gone was the self-pity that had him doubting their relationship and the loneliness he felt from the photo. She had succeeded in pulling him out of the abyss and back on top of the world. He was with her, just the two of them talking. It was exactly where he wanted to be.


	26. Chapter 26

Carly reached the end of the trail and turned around. She smiled brightly at the spectacular view below her. She could barely make out Steve's house in the distance, overly pleased with herself for making the trek. She knew he would have disapproved so she left a note instead of calling him. She had to get out of the house for a while or she would have gone mad. It had been almost a week since she'd been home from the hospital and he'd been working so much, getting call after call and having to leave at a moments notice. She didn't blame him, it was his job and she understood, but being home alone and nothing to do was torture.

She sat down in the dirt and leaned back against a rock. She had only seen two other people on the trail as she was coming up and they were heading down. She took a drink of water and a pain pill for the trip down. The late afternoon sun felt good as it peeked from behind the clouds. There was a nice breeze off the ocean that swept up the hillside, cooling her down. It was a perfect day for walking. She laid her head back and closed her eyes, enjoying the solitude when her cell phone rang.

She felt a little squeamish answering, seeing his picture that displayed. But she couldn't help but smile at the photo. She'd snapped it a couple of days earlier when he had fallen asleep on the couch with the remote in one hand and a package of Oreos lying on his chest.

"You are a naughty girl," Steve said into his phone, standing at the front door looking up toward the mountain where she presumably was.

"Hi," she said sheepishly. He didn't sound angry of course, but she could tell he wasn't happy about it either.

He shook his head, slightly annoyed with her but at the same time liking that adventurous side of her. "Where are you?"

"At the top of the trail. I can see the house. Can you see me waving?" she grinned.

"Naughty, naughty," he scolded her again. "Are you ok?"

"Yes, I'm just resting before coming down."

He glanced at his watch, "Don't wait too long, it's going to be dark soon."

"It's so pretty up here and there's a nice breeze. It's hard to leave."

He knew that trail like the back of his hand. He used to run it three times a week before switching to swimming. He hadn't been up there in a while, picturing the view and agreeing with her evaluation. He came back inside, closing the door. "Do you have water?"

She looked at her bottle that was almost empty. "Yes, but I wish I would have brought some snacks. I'm hungry," she looked back down at the tiny house in the far off distance. "Will you please bring me a sandwich?" she whined.

"Sure," he chuckled, "let me get right on that. You just sit tight and I'll beam myself up."

"Ok, smart ass," she laughed, "I'm heading down in a couple of minutes."

"Be careful and keep your phone on."

"Ahh," she said, pushing herself up off the ground, "Are you worried about me?"

"No," he lied, "I'm worried I might have to run up there and carry your butt down."

"Liar," she said, "You don't have to worry. I'm capable."

"Capable of falling down. It's easy on those trails if you don't pay attention. So pay attention."

"Yes sir!" she said sternly. "Since you can't see me I'm saluting you right now."

"Keep it up," he warned, "I'm not always such a nice guy."

"Liar again," she purred.

He smiled, "Just get moving."

"Bye, bye," she hung up, smiling at the picture that disappeared. She did think he worried too much about her sometimes. It wasn't as if she were in any real danger. She was just walking down. But then she reconsidered her recent life altering events and couldn't blame him. It was actually nice to have people in your life that worried. She felt bad for teasing him about that. She should feel blessed.

She considered her parents then too and what they had gone through over the past month almost losing her, especially since they had already lost one daughter. Her thoughts then drifted to her sister knowing Steve had been apart of her life as well.

She stopped dead in her tracks. Her heart rate soared and it was like she was blinded by a wave of memories of Karen and Steve by a river. Jules was there, and Craig! And Jack! She'd only known him from pictures but suddenly she knew exactly who he was. He was there too!

The hair stood up on the back of her neck as images rapidly flashed in her head, one by one of that fateful day until she was able to put them all together to form a movie that played out in her mind of Karen being pulled away by the water. She wanted to make it stop but it just kept rolling over and over.

She felt weak and reached down, putting her hand on a boulder as she leaned back against it. "Oh my God," she cried!

The memory of her sister being pulled under the rocks was as clear as if she were standing there now. She closed her eyes, picturing Karen's hand as she reached out, gripping another one. "Oh God, Steve!" she gasped, realizing then it was his hand that held on to her. She remembered him looking over his shoulder, screaming out to Craig and Jack, who ran to him over the slippery rocks.

Carly slid down the boulder until she was sitting. Her hand over her heart, tears filled her eyes as the memory ruthlessly spun over and over in her mind. It played out like a horror movie and she felt sick to her stomach remembering the panic and screams on the riverbank from all of them when the water violently took Karen away.

She pulled her knees up to her chest and laid her head on them, sobbing for her sister. It was a horrible memory and she didn't know how she had lived through it. The funeral caught up with her next and she remembered hiding up her room to escape from it. She couldn't recall going to a cemetery or where she was buried. Her mind was racing, picking up on bits and pieces as she asked herself questions. Some answers she knew but others were blank pages.

She fumbled with her phone needing to hear her parent's voice. She needed answers that couldn't wait until she got home. She needed answers now! She wiped away her tears and pushed send.

Jason answered, pleased to be hearing from her. "Hello Honey." His face quickly became concerned over the sound of her voice.

"Oh Daddy," she sobbed, "I remem…" she burst out crying unable to describe what she felt.

"Carly!" he said, trying to remain calm, "Calm down Honey, tell me what happened."

Her lungs felt tight and she couldn't catch her breath. "Kar…Karen." She managed to blurt out between gasps and he knew instantly what was happening.

"Are you remembering Karen's accident Carly?" He felt his own emotions begin to get the better of him. Just hearing the agony in his daughter's voice brought back so many painful memories from that year.

"Yes," she shuttered, gasping between breaths, "and, I remember…I remember how she drowned. I was there!" she sobbed, "I saw it Dad!" She rested her head back on her knees. "We were all there. Oh God Daddy it was horrible."

He wanted to reach thru the phone and touch her, wishing he wasn't an ocean away from her. "Are you with Steve, Carly." He began to worry about her state of mind.

She looked up, fully aware that Steve was the one holding her hand, but the impact of that moment and what he was trying to do hit her full force. "Steve," she said weakly. "He was there," she could hardly breathe getting the words out. "He was trying to pull her out."

"Yes, he tried to…" Jason explained, "he tried to save her, but the current pulled her away from his grip," he said with regret. "It almost killed him too but the other boys pulled him out of the water when he went in after her."

Carly felt numb as her Father explained to her in detail Steve's efforts. Her history with him wasn't about time anymore. She always thought their friendship had been sustained because they knew each other for so long, but it had nothing to do with time. Their relationship was so much more than that. She laid her head back against the rock. "Why didn't anyone tell me that?" The shock was beginning to wear off.

"It was such a horrible experience Carly. We knew you would eventually remember. Can you really blame any of us for not wanting to tell you that story?"

She held the phone and shook her head as fresh tears fell down her cheeks. She looked down the valley toward the house. "Does he still feel that guilt?" she asked, wondering if that was the reason he cared for her so much. Was it really love or did he feel obligated because of Karen?

"I don't think so. He and I talked briefly about it while we were there and you two said your peace to each other after you reunited a couple of months ago."

"You mean on that trip we took at that lake?"

"Do you remember that?" Jason asked, worried that if she remembered the lake then she would remember everything, including the attack. That frightened him.

"No, Jules told me we were together at some lake but I don't remember that."

"That's ok Honey, one day at a time," he assured her. "Are you ok?"

She sniffed, looking out over the ocean seeing the sunset begin to change the colors in the sky, realizing she had taken too long and it would be dark before she could get back. "Yes, I feel better," she said it to appease him. "Thanks Dad. I have to go though. I want to get back before dark."

"Are you sure you're ok? Should I call Steve?"

"No," she replied quickly. She needed a minute to absorb all this before she could speak with him. "I'm alright. I love you Daddy," she said in a child's voice.

"I love you too, Carly."

They hung up and she let the phone drop to her side, still sitting on the ground staring out at the horizon. Her mind fixed on Karen and the vision of Steve as he struggled to hold her.

* * *

Steve waited in his truck at the bottom of the trail for her to come down. Time wise he knew it would only be a couple more minutes and she'd be there. He was going to surprise her with a sandwich. He looked at his watch, considering the time and darkness fast approaching; both began to get the better of him. He pulled out his cell phone, bringing up her number.

She saw his picture come up and it was as if he had taken on a whole new identity since she had spoken to him less than an hour before. "Steve?" she answered barely above a whisper.

He heard something in her voice. "What's wrong?"

She bent her head and started to cry again, the combination of hearing his voice and the emotional memory was too much.

"Carly, are you hurt?!" his voice stressing his concern.

"No," she sniffed, not wanting to frighten him anymore than she could already sense that he was. "It's just that…" she paused, wiping her face on the bottom of her shirt, "I remember Karen drowning," her voice broke, "and I remember what happened with you and Karen…and the river."

He looked up through his windshield to where she was, wishing he were there. His heart went out to her hearing that pain in her voice. She was reliving it all over again as if for the first time. He'd had years to deal with it and the forgiveness at the lake house from her had let it settle to a place where he could live with it in peace, she on the other hand wasn't so lucky. Of all the memories she had to regain, why did she have to remember this one? It broke his heart to hear her cry. It was a sound he would never get used to.

"Where are you?" he reached over in the glove compartment and took out a small flashlight.

She shook her head, looking out as the horizon turned dark from the sunset. "I don't know. I'm sorry Steve," she started to cry again, "You've been through so much because of me."

He got out and started jogging for the trail head about fifty feet in front of him. "Are you still on the trail?"

"I don't know why you would want to stay with me when it seems all I give you is grief."

"Stop it Carly! Tell me if you are still on the trail?!" His voice was commanding and stern. It was a tone she'd never heard come from him. She knew he wanted an answer.

"Yes," she started to get up, "I'm coming down now."

"No!" he said in the same tone, "I'm on my way up. Stay where you are."

She slid back down the rock feeling exhausted. "I'm so sorry, Steve."

"There's nothing for you to be sorry for Carly," his voice was back to the calm, placid tone that she knew. "I've never regretted one single day since I met you, and I never will." He started up the dirt trail, "I don't want you to move. Do you understand?"

"Yes," she answered, feeling comforted both by his voice and the fact that he would be there soon.

He slid his phone into the pocket of his shorts and went from a jogging pace to a full-out sprint up the trail.

* * *

She rested her head against the rock, beginning to understand the depth of their relationship and why it had survived even after all those years they were apart. Even now, she barely remembered her past with him; yet every night before she went to sleep she could find something new she learned about him that day and every morning she woke up eager to find something else. She shuttered just thinking back at the idea of wanting to go home with her parents. What if she had followed through with that? She felt strongly now that it would have been the single biggest mistake of her life.

He didn't stay with her out of loyalty to Karen; she knew that now. He stayed because of her. It was a euphoric feeling that floated through her, understanding now where those smiles in the photo she had found of the two of them came from. They weren't just two people stumbling through life with a traditional relationship that they had to work on everyday. Somehow she knew it went deeper than that. She never felt it a struggle to make him happy and vice versa. They fit in with each other as if they were meant to be together. She knew what he needed and he knew what she needed. Even the other day when she saw him sitting on the bed, holding the picture, she knew all she had to do was just be a presence in the room and he'd be ok, and he was. Her heart began to race, feeling that same need from him now. It felt crystal clear that all she needed was his presence and she knew she would be ok.

No sooner did that revelation hit her did she see the light he was carrying flash as he sprinted up the trail in the distance, his only mission to get to her as quickly as possible. "Yes," she thought, pushing herself up, "he loves me very much."

She ran toward him, her knees weak but in a different way now. He wasn't the same man to her that she had said goodbye to that morning. He was so much more.

He looked up, seeing her on the trail ahead and stopped about twenty feet from her, tucking the small flashlight in his back pocket. The sweat he had built up wasn't only from the run but from the urgency he felt to get to her in the shortest amount of time. Now that he was here his emotions went from one extreme to another. She walked toward him and as she neared he saw a look on her face that he hadn't seen in so long. His heart rate was already off the charts from the run, but her face was so beautiful the way she was looking at him he actually had to take a step back to brace himself on the slight incline. She didn't stop or take her eyes off his once until she was close enough to wrap her arms around his body, which she did.

She gripped his wet shirt from behind and laid her head on his shoulder that was the perfect height and felt so inviting. She imagined she had done this on a regular basis because it felt so good; even more so when his arms went around her. His chest pushed against hers as his heavy breathing calmed. He was warm and slightly damp from the run but she didn't care. It felt like heaven and she didn't want to let go right away, hoping he wouldn't either.

It was the first real physical contact he'd had from her in over a month. God how he missed her; everything he had gone through was forgotten the second she put her arms around him. All he needed in life was this right here. He returned the gesture, breathing her in like he used too. She felt so good, sliding into that position in his neck that was made for her. His hands roamed over her back, calming her and bringing her in closer.

"Are you ok?" he whispered into her ear.

She nodded into his neck not wanting to let go, and didn't.

They held firm in that position for a long time before she finally released him, getting her fill. She kept her head down with tears still filling her eyes. But that wasn't satisfying enough for him. He had to see her and cupped her cheek with his hand, lifting her face up. He wiped a tear that balanced in the corner of her eyes with his thumb. "Big day huh?"

She nodded into his hand, looking up at the kindheartedness that emulated from him. He was so good to her, and more than anything else, he wanted her. This model of a man that fit the formula any woman in the world would have created if the opportunity arose, and he could have his pick of any of them, but he wanted her. Her whole body felt it and she was more than willing to share with him whatever he craved. She wanted to taste him and experience that next step. '_Please kiss me_,' her thoughts implored him.

He let his hand fall, feeling himself getting too caught up in the way she was looking at him. If it had been a month earlier he probably would have found a way to make love to her right then and there, but it wasn't. They had come so far in the last week and he didn't want to do anything to jeopardize what they had built. A kiss would have been so fulfilling, but he wasn't so sure that after what she had just gone through if it would only be fulfilling his need and not hers. He stepped back, reaching down taking her hand instead. "We should go." He took the flashlight out of his back pocket and turned, shining it on the path. "Just follow my footsteps." He gripped her hand firmly, leading the way down.

Her eyes were locked on his back instead of his feet, feeling confident he would take her in the right direction. She felt delirious holding his hand as she followed behind him. His energy soared through her like a drug, lifting her off the ground as if she were walking on clouds. The bond she felt with him getting stronger with every step, knowing that even if he would have decided to walked off a cliff, she would have held on with both hands and gone with him. She trusted him that much.


	27. Chapter 27

Carly came down the stairs hearing him enter through the front door. "Hi, I'm almost ready." She ran to the kitchen scooping up her purse and tossing the items next to it inside.

"Wow," he grinned, standing by the door with his hands on his hips, "I've never seen anyone so excited to go to the doctor."

She smiled over at him, "It's my last appointment! Yes, I'm excited."

"Oh that's right. I forgot," he lied, "last appointment." He smiled to himself, having already planned a night out to celebrate.

She looked at him queerly, "How could you forget that? I've only mentioned it about a thousand times."

He shrugged, "I barely listen to you when you talk."

She walked toward him, rolling her eyes at his teasing grin. "And I barely notice when you walk around without a T-shirt on." She patted his stomach as she continued out the door.

That comment caught him off guard. He had sensed a slight flirtation from her over the last couple of days but that was blatant and couldn't be misinterpreted. It felt like the old Carly had just breezed by him. He swore he could still feel where her hand had touched him.

* * *

The rain fell on the windshield as Carly ran from the hospital parking lot to the open truck door. She jumped in and closed it quickly.

"It's raining so hard!" she said to him.

Steve leaned forward looking out the windshield. "It reminds me of this one day at the lake. It's coming down hard, but it'll be over quick. It's that time of year." He smiled over at her, "Well, how was the last appointment?"

She glanced over at him. "Why won't anyone tell me about Allan?"

He sat back in his seat and stared over at her. This was twice in one day that she had blindsided him. "Why…" he shook his head confused, "why would you want to know about him?" He gripped the bottom of the steering wheel becoming tense just over hearing that name. He hated that fucker and he hoped he was burning in hell.

Carly saw the change in him instantly and regretted asking. She thought maybe that was a question for someone else besides him, but it was too late. "I don't know. He was apart of my life that I don't remember."

"A part you don't need to remember! Jesus Carly…" He wiped his hand over his forehead as if still bewildered by that question. He looked away from her out the window, wondering where this came from all of a sudden. "Did you talk about him at your appointment?" he felt slightly jolted that she was so curious about her past with Allan, while her past with him was still a mystery and was going to remain that way it seemed like.

"We discussed him a little," she said, really regretting it now. "Dr. Caldwell wants me to go see a specialist in California that deals with memory loss."

He looked back over at her, that was number three. "What?! You're leaving Hawaii?"

She stared down at her hands. "Just for a couple of weeks is all."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He was stunned. A car behind him beeped their horn asking him to move on so they could take advantage of the close spot to the entrance. He glanced in his rearview mirror and put the truck in gear stepping on the gas just a little to abruptly as the back tires spun before he released and did it more conservatively.

"Steve," she said passively, "this is nothing against you."

"Oh no," he snapped, "I don't take offense to it at all!"

She turned in her seat, "Pull over."

"Let's just not talk about it." He steered toward the exit, ignoring her request.

"Stop!" she reached over grabbing the steering wheel.

"Carly!" he pushed her hand away, "What are you doing?"

"Stop!" she said again.

He whipped the truck over taking up two spots in the far end of the parking lot, throwing it in park. "What the hells the matter with you?! Don't grab the steering wheel when I'm trying to drive!"

She sat back in her seat looking at him not concerned over the tongue thrashing but more worried over his outlook about Allan and her trip. "Please don't be upset over this."

He'd be lying if he told her he wasn't, so he didn't. The rain pounded on the truck making the silence in the cab deafening. A part of him wanted to tell her everything, from the Jet Ski incident all the way up to the part where he held her in his arms as she bled out from the wounds that Allan inflicted on her. But he knew he couldn't do that. He loved her and that would be beyond cruel. He just didn't say anything.

"Steve please," she felt sick to her stomach. The last thing she wanted was to make him unhappy. Things had been going so well and the feelings she had for him were blossoming faster than she could control. She was falling in love with him, she was sure of it.

He felt dazed wondering if her plan to leave had always been there and she just needed an excuse to make it happen. He loved her so much and was slowly coming to terms that she didn't feel the same. They hadn't talked about the two of them since that day she found the picture. That hurt, but like everything over this crazy six weeks, he let go of it, telling himself it would all work out. It was Carly after all. They had a bond that couldn't be severed, but that hope too was beginning to fade. "What do you want from me Carly?" his voice calmed and his question didn't come in the form of a statement or a cliché`, he asked as if he genuinely wanted to know. He emphasized it the second time around by looking right at her; his eyes so full of disappointment over their conversation. "What do you want from me?"

It was a loaded question and one she had so many answers too but couldn't wrap her brain around one. She opened her mouth to reply but nothing came out, she wanted to tell him she didn't want anything, but she did. She wanted everything. It just couldn't get past her lips.

He took her silence as a negative reply. She always used to be able to tell him everything. Silence wasn't something that existed in their relationship. It was just another reminder of the reality he was stuck in. He had been trying so hard to bring her back from what Allan had created and now all she wanted was to talk about him. Remember him! It felt like a stab in the back.

He wished now he hadn't made the plans for dinner with Danny and Gracie. He just wanted to go home, but it was too late to change it now. He put the truck in reverse and backed out.

"Steve," she sighed, "Please don't be mad."

"Put on your seat belt," he ordered. His voice telling her he was done with this conversation.

She bit her bottom lip, knowing she had missed her opportunity to make it right with him. She did as she was told and faced the window.

* * *

They came out of the restaurant in pairs. Gracie and Carly and then Steve and Danny.

"Thanks for dinner," Danny said, slapping Steve on the back.

"You're welcome." He looked over at Carly and Gracie as they walked toward the main street in Waikiki. "Where are you guys going?" he called out.

Gracie turned and waved her arm for them to follow. "I want to show Carly this necklace I want for Christmas."

"Gracie!" Danny called out, "Waikiki is packed this time of night and Carly doesn't want to see that necklace."

"Yes I do," she countered him. Both girls turned back around, continuing on their mission.

Steve and Danny looked at each other, knowing they had lost. Steve motioned with his hand to follow them.

"So what's up with you and Carly?" Danny asked as the two of them walked behind, just out of earshot of the girls. "Did you guys have a fight or something?"

Steve crossed his arms as they strolled along, "Or something. I thought we hid it pretty well. I guess not."

"You hid it enough for Gracie, but of course she's twelve." He tapped his finger on his temple. "She doesn't have the intuitiveness of her old man."

Steve huffed, "Wow, your like a freak of nature. I should pawn you off to the circus when they come."

"Was I right, or was I right?"

Steve looked over at him, "We hardly said a word to each other through dinner. Don't pat yourself on the back too hard."

"What are you fighting about?"

He looked over at him, "I'm not going to walk down the street and talk about my relationship with you like I'm a thirteen year old girl."

Danny shrugged it off, "Ok, I was just making conversation."

Steve watched her walk ahead of them talking with Gracie. They pointed out items in the store windows and even though he couldn't hear them he could make out the likes and dislikes. She had a good relationship with Gracie. He imagined her as a mother and knew she would be good at it. She would balance him out and make him a better a father too; he knew that for a fact. He didn't like this place they were in right now, but he couldn't help but feel bitter over the conversation in the truck. It stung and he couldn't understand her reasoning behind it. He could feel his resentment gaining momentum as he dwelled on it.

"Do you know what she said to me today?" he blurted out angrily, glaring at her ahead of them.

Danny almost laughed, knowing he would eventually come clean, "What? That you're predictable?"

Steve looked over at him annoyed, "What?"

He shook his head grinning, "Nothing. What did she say that pissed you off?"

"She wanted to know why no one talks about Allan," he let out a low growl. "Can you believe that shit?! Allan! Of all the fucking people she knows, she wants to know about him!"

Danny motioned for him to keep his voice down when both the girls turned around hearing only the 'f' word and an older couple walking past gave him the stink eye. "C'mon were in the middle of downtown Waikiki, settle down!"

"She has so many good memories she can reflect on." He put his hand on his chest, "I've given her plenty. Why him? I don't get it!"

"What's there to get? It's a part of her past. She wants to know about her past!" he used his hands to talk, "And frankly the fact that everyone keeps it a secret from her probably just heightens her curiosity."

"But he tried to kill her, twice!" he used his fingers as an example, "why would she want to relive that? You should have seen her the other day when she remembered Karen's' death," he sighed, hearing her cries over the phone, not wanting to hear that ever again. "It was really bad. It was hard to hear and see. I don't want to go through that again."

Danny looked up at him. "So this isn't necessarily about Carly, this is more about you."

"What?! You don't know what you're talking about!"

"Sure I do. And I know you. You're jealous. You're pissed off that she wants to know about this guy and at the same time here you are treading water wondering why she's standing there with a life preserver and won't throw it out to you."

Steve stopped and looked at his overly pleased grin at knowing he had hit the jackpot on that theory. "I'm not jealous of Allan, Danny! That's a pretty messed up thing to say."

"I didn't say you were jealous of Allan," he corrected him, "of course you're not jealous of him. But you can't stand there and tell me that you aren't worried that her memory might come back about him before it does about you."

"Of course I am! That isn't some big news flash. I've been waiting for over a month. You think it's easy to listen to her want to know about him when she should be asking about me!"

Danny opened his hands up, as if he had just answered his own question. "There you go. This isn't about you Steve. This isn't about Carly wanting to hurt you. This is about her trying to come to terms with what happened to her. Think about it. What if it was you that woke up in a hospital with thirteen knife wounds in your belly from someone that you couldn't remember but at one time was your wife. Wouldn't you want to know why they did what they did? Hell, you're still trying to cope with the fact that you never got to wipe the floor with him," he sighed, wishing he could have seen that. "How do you think Carly feels?"

He hated it when he was right. He also hated it when he could point out the obvious when it was staring him right in the face. He looked up the way as she and Gracie waited for them outside the jewelry store. Gracie waved for them to hurry and Carly stood staring at him with that same pained expression, because she knew he was upset with her. He hated that look. "She wants to go to California for two weeks to see a specialist," he said somberly.

"So."

He looked at him and didn't have to say that he didn't want her to go, it was written all over his face.

"You can't keep her here under your wing and expect everything to work out on its own. You're doing good Steve our plan is working. She's still here. It's obvious she wants to be here, but did you think for a second that maybe she wants to go to California so things could be even better here? Maybe she's going for you."

"I need reassurance that she'll come back."

"Then tell her that."

He thought he had over and over the past month, but he still hadn't got an answer from her. He felt close to her, more and more everyday, but for his own peace of mind, he needed the reassurance from her without him having to ask or beg. He just couldn't do it. Danny had nailed it on the head though with the treading water theory. Most days he felt like he was going under and then something would happen and he'd find the strength to catch another breath, but it was getting more and more difficult. He was afraid this separation might be his breaking point.

Gracie came running back to them and took both of their hands, dragging them down the sidewalk. "Come on slow pokes."

Steve went with her willingly still focused on Carly as Danny pointed out the prices in that particular store and Santa not being made of money.

Carly felt her palms begin to sweat as they neared. His piercing blue eyes showed more compassion than they had in the last two hours. She felt relived over that, hoping that maybe this was behind them. She smiled at him but was quickly diverted by Gracie as she too was pulled into the store.

* * *

They came out fifteen minutes later with no necklace but a couple of ideas for both Steve and Danny for Christmas presents for her. Steve had even managed to get a glimpse at rings, but after the day they had, looking at them felt slightly depressing. They weren't there yet, they weren't even close. She didn't love him. He was convinced that if she did, she wouldn't leave him.

Danny took Gracie by the shoulder and turned her in the direction back to the restaurant. "We're going to head out. School night."

Steve went to follow when Carly reached for his arm. "Do you want to walk around for a while?"

He saw the pleading in her eyes and also thought it would be a better distraction than going home and having that giant elephant in the middle of the room. He nodded, "Sure."

They said their goodbyes to Danny and Gracie and stood on the sidewalk as crowds of people walked by them.

"Which way?" Carly asked.

He looked down Kalakaua Ave, which was the main strip of Waikiki. "There's some good shops down this way," he pointed.

Carly nodded her approval and they both started slowly walking down the street, side by side.

"Dinner was good," Carly said, "Thank you."

'You're welcome." He put an arm around her waist pulling toward him as a group of Japanese tourists blocked their path. He maneuvered around them and then let her go again.

"I think Danny will end up buying Gracie that necklace. What do you think?" Carly asked, trying to make conversation with him.

Steve shrugged, "I don't know, probably." They came up on a street performer, which were the norm in downtown Waikiki, located about every hundred yards. This one must have been good because the crowd gathered around them blocking the path. Steve got stuck behind a slow moving older couple as they stopped to argue about which direction their hotel was located. Carly kept going not noticing his absence.

She turned to say something and stopped looking behind her. She spotted him from his height in the crowd. He rolled his eyes, pointing at the old couple as they bickered back and forth. He couldn't get around them and started to laugh as the argument turned to an old one of when they were lost on a trip in Texas. The old man argued that it was her fault for not folding the map back correctly. She argued that he couldn't read it right even if it was folded right.

Carly pushed her way through the groups of people and finally made it over to him. She stood next to him when Steve finally intervened the couple, "Excuse me, but which hotel are you looking for, I can probably tell you which direction?"

They both looked over their shoulder and up at him. "The Waikiki Grand." The older man said.

Steve point straight ahead, "It's down that way about four blocks."

Carly smiled at them, standing close to Steve because there was nowhere else to stand.

"Thank you young man," the woman said. She looked at the two of them. "What a lovely couple you are." She glanced over at her husband smiling, "Reminds me of you and I at one point."

He laughed, taking her hand. "What do you mean at one point?"

She looked back at Steve and Carly. "Are you on your honeymoon?"

Steve went to correct her when Carly jumped in.

"Second honeymoon actually!" She wrapped her hand around his arm, "ten years and five kids." She glanced up at him with an adoring smile. "Isn't that right darling?"

He looked at her teasing grin and played along for the heck of it. "That's right, and with any luck we'll make it six on this trip. Isn't that right sweetie?"

Carly laughed, enjoying the fun. "That's right."

"Six!" the older woman exclaimed.

Carly looked at her, putting her arms around Steve's neck, "Well look at him, can you blame me?" She bit her bottom lip, growling at him, pretending to nibble his ear.

"Right back at you baby," Steve said, trying not to bust out laughing, "I can't keep my hands off of her, she's a tiger," he nudged the old man with a wink "you know what I mean?"

The couple looked at each other appalled and quickly said their thank you and moved on through the crowd.

Steve laughed, looking at her, "You are such a pervert. I think you offended them."

"Me?" she countered. "What was with the 'I can't keep my hands off of her?'" only she repeated it in a deep voice.

"I don't sound like that!" He put his arms around her waist while hers were still around his neck. "And you with the whole five kids thing."

She leaned back looking at him, "What? You don't think five kids in ten years is reasonable?"

"I like my hair black not gray."

Carly ran her fingers over the side of his head, smoothing his hair back. "You'd look good with some speckles of gray." She looked right at him, "you'd look good no matter what."

He held onto her, not letting go just yet. The crowd around hadn't let up but everyone around them seemed to vanish. He could only see her. He thought maybe it was an unusual time and place but he didn't want that dark cloud hanging over his head anymore. "I think I understand why you need to know about Allan."

She didn't want this moment spoiled by that name or that person. "I shouldn't have said that to you. I'm sorry."

He pulled her closer, "I don't want you to ever feel that you can't tell me something. I was wrong and I overreacted. You can tell me anything Carly."

She felt like he was stepping back to let her have the floor. She wondered if that wasn't an invitation as much as it was a statement. She didn't want to let it go by without voicing her feelings. She had wanted to say so much since that day he walked her down the mountain but she just couldn't find the nerve. As she looked at him and felt the heat from his body against her, she couldn't figure out what she had been so afraid of. It could only make things better.

"When you asked me earlier, 'what do you want from me'?" she rested her hand on his chest, " I saw how happy I was in that picture, how happy we both were. I want that." There were times, like at that second that she could see her past in him even with out remembering it. "You really did love me very much at one time, didn't you?" she asked.

His eyes roamed over her beautiful face, focusing on her lips. "You make it sound as if I stopped," he replied.

"Did you…stop?"

His hand went up her back until he had it buried in her hair, a place that had felt like home but he hadn't visited in so long. "No, I didn't stop. I still love you very much."

He thought he would feel relieved finally being able to say it to her, but not having it mutual made it almost meaningless in his eyes. He knew she wasn't there yet. He shouldn't have said it but for just that second it felt comfortable, familiar, and he missed that so much. God, it hurt worse now more than ever.

"I love you too," she said unexpectedly. She on the other hand did feel relieved to say it. It had been there the whole time and felt so good to get out.

He let go of her hair and let his hands fall to her arms, griping her a little too tightly. "Don't say that just because I did! I know you don't love me Carly, so don't just say it to fill the gap in the air," his voice bitter, angry that she would use that word so loosely.

"I'm not," she argued, "why don't you believe me?"

"Because you don't even know me." The hurt from that hadn't gone away he had just learned to mange it, but it was all coming unraveled as he stood there faced with the realism that it was all just a sympathy play to her. "I think you're saying that because you feel like you have to, but you don't. I wish you hadn't said anything at all. Don't treat me like the poor sap. I don't need your pity!"

"Steve," she said stunned, not knowing where any of this was coming from.

He gripped her tighter almost making a scene, his voice low and angry, but his face showed the pain that was engulfing him. "Don't lie to me!"

He moved past her making his way through the crowd. He felt like she was playing with him. He heard her call his name but he kept going. His anger toward her quickly turned toward him. How could he have let himself fall into this trap? He felt his chest tighten, needing to get the fuck out of there.

"Shit," he mumbled feeling everything he had been holding inside over the last six weeks begin to surface. The people's faces were blurred from the relentless tears that filled his eyes. He didn't even know if he was headed in the right direction back to the car. '_Christ_,' he thought, feeling that pain as if his heart was going to break into a million pieces, _'this is crazy! I don't fucking cry! You're in the middle of downtown Waikiki! Get it together_!' But no matter how hard he tried to contain himself and deny the wave of emotions that crashed over him like a wave, one right after another he was convinced that he was having some sort of breakdown. His vision was distorted and he stopped, having no idea where he was. He couldn't catch his breath and everything was spinning. He was scared to death of what was happening to him, feeling either he was going to pass out, or breakdown into tears in the middle of Kalakaua Ave. He felt a tug on his arm and began to move in the direction he was being pulled.

Carly steered him down a side street that led to the service entrance of a hotel. She leaned him back against the wall as he bent over, bracing his hands on his knees.

"It's ok, just breathe," she instructed while rubbing her hand gently over his back. She could feel the sweat through his shirt. "You're ok Steve. It's ok to feel whatever you are feeling. It's ok," she said soothingly, squatting down in front of him. She was trying to remain calm for him but her heart was racing. She just wanted whatever was happening to him to stop, it scared her.

"I can't do this anymore Carly," he mumbled, feeling like the ground was opening up and he was going to get sucked in. He reached out for her, grabbing onto her and standing up at the same time, taking her with him. He held tightly onto her arm, pulling her close, gently shaking her as if he were angry. "I can't do this anymore," his voice on the verge of breaking.

Her face was close to his, the shocked expression told him she didn't understand. "Do what Steve? What can't you do?"

He reached up, cupping her face with his trembling hand. "I can't pretend like everything is working out. I can't pretend to be this close to you and not want to touch you. I can't live in the same house with you and not want you in my bed." He dropped his head down, "I just can't do this anymore," he cried, "I miss you. I love you and I know that you don't feel it and I think that you leaving is your way out." He looked up at her trying to fight off the next wave that could possibly do him in. "If it is your way out, it's ok." He lied, but felt he needed to give her that opening.

"How can you say that?!" She put her hands on his shoulders, pushing him back against the wall. "Just because I don't remember our past doesn't mean that I don't know who you are. I love this person!" She put a hand on his chest, "the one who has been there for me everyday since I woke up, "she gripped on to his shirt, making a fist of the material, tugging on it as if wanting him to hear her. "I love this person that has made me laugh and made feel safe and given me so much love in return that as I'm standing here right now I feel like I'm fighting for my life! Please don't think I would say that I love you just because it was the proper reply. I do love you!" Her voice calmed as she explained, "I know who you are Steve. I know exactly who you are, and I don't need to find my memory to know that." She smiled at him, "You drink milk out of carton. You fall asleep on the couch watching TV. You're an amazing police officer. You eat my horrible cooking." She smiled brighter getting a grin from him on that. "But most of all, you love me. Please don't deny me that same pleasure."

He realized then that he had done it. He had done exactly what Danny had encouraged him to do. He had managed to get her to fall in love with him all over again. He didn't even know how. His emotions were all over the place. He'd been so wound up for so long as if just waiting for the bomb to drop at any minute. He didn't know she had arrived to his level in the relationship, and just hearing it from her in that description, knowing he could finally let go of her not remembering what they had before because it really didn't matter anymore, was a freedom he just didn't know how to describe. He looked up at her feeling completely drained yet at the same time he felt that shift in their relationship he had been holding out for. He touched her face in a way that he'd been craving, moving his thumb over her lips, his arm around her waist pulling her intimately close.

She felt like putty in his arms, holding on around his neck so she wouldn't slide down to the ground, although if he didn't kiss her soon she felt she might fall to her knees and beg him too. "Please don't make me wait anymore," she whispered.

He smiled, recalling that was the exact statement she had made to him the first time they had made love. And just like then he gave her what she asked.

The second they connected she seemed to know exactly what to do in order to heighten his pleasure; it felt so natural. She greeted him with the same enthusiasm as if they'd been starving for it. His body relaxed almost immediately and all she could think of was the picture. She felt like she looked in the picture. It was unbelievable. He really knew how to kiss, she thought, or was it that he knew how to kiss her? That very idea made her weak and she held onto him savoring every second of it.

They finally broke apart, not even knowing that two people had walked by, commenting on the display. They were in their own little world again. It was as if he was waking up from a bad dream and nothing had really changed at all. He rested his head on her shoulder, putting both his arms around her tightly.

She held him just as close, "Let's not worry about the past anymore, lets just focus on us for now."

His cheek brushed against hers as he faced her again, resting his forehead on hers. "I forgot how easy it was to be with you."

She kissed him on the lips, "You haven't seen anything yet."


	28. Chapter 28

Carly and Steve pulled up to the house as another rainstorm poured down on them. He turned the engine off and smiled over at her; both of them still reeling over their encounter in downtown Waikiki. "The rain is back." He put his hand over top of hers that had been resting on his leg the whole ride home.

She grinned back at him. "You go first and bring me back an umbrella."

"Well aren't you the quick thinker," he laughed, undoing his seatbelt. "Anything else I can do for you, princess?"

"Yes please, bring me back some other shoes too. I might get my feet wet in these."

She shrieked as he lunged toward her, pinning her against the door. "Steve!" she giggled, holding him at bay with her hands on his chest.

"I'll do it," he agreed, "but it'll cost you."

She tilted her head in question, "What would you like?"

He smiled wryly and leaned in, kissing her. Being in this place with her again felt amazing.

She moaned softly, letting him know she liked it. He kissed her two more times, pleased with himself over her radiant expression.

"Ok," she sighed, "I'll go get you the umbrella instead."

He laughed, kissing her once more quickly on the cheek. "Why don't we both just make a run for it."

She nodded in agreement.

They both opened their doors just slightly and looked over at each other.

"Ready?" she said.

"Go!" he shouted as they both opened and slammed their doors at the same time. The rain came down in sheets soaking them almost instantly. Steve went to run past her toward the house when she reached her hand out, grabbing his arm.

"Ladies first," she laughed, holding him back.

"Hey!"

She let go and went to dash past him when he caught up with her easily, grabbing her around the waist and turning her so she was facing the opposite direction, giving him the advantage.

She ran after him again and suddenly a bright light flashed overhead and a loud clap of thunder followed, stopping her in her tracks. She put her hand over her chest startled, looking up as another bright flash came from behind the house. She half screeched and half laughed, covering her ears, knowing what was coming.

Steve turned when he got to the porch, looking over his shoulder assuming she was right on his heels. He saw her about twenty yards away standing in the rain with her hands over her ears, her shoulders tense, it was then that he remembered how afraid of thunderstorms she was.

She closed her eyes, waiting for the bomb to drop when the memory of opening a door and seeing a soaked teenage boy standing there came to her. Her heart beat faster realizing it was the same boy that tried to pull her sister from the river, Steve. The house was her parent's, her sister was there, it was raining hard like now and he had come to be with them because they were scared. She answered her own questions as if she were looking at pictures and describing the story that was associated with them. She was in the middle of a memory when she felt his hands on her arms, pulling them down away from her ears.

"Are you ok?" he smiled as the rain pounded on them, but neither one caring at the moment. "I know you hate thunder and lighting."

She stared up at him seeing the boy in her memory. "You came to my parents house when we were young and stayed with Karen and I because we were afraid of a thunder-storm."

It took a second for him to recognize what was happening. He gathered both of her hands in his and brought them up to his wet lips and kissed them. "Yes, I did," he nodded; thrilled that she remembered something else about him.

She smiled and started to cry at the same time, it was such a good memory but most of all she was glad that it included him. She put both her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. The rain let up some but it didn't matter anymore, they were both soaked to the core. "You came there for me, because I needed you there. I remember that."

"Of course I came." He pulled back so he could see her, "I told you this once before," he smoothed his hand over her head, trying to wipe away the excess water dripping on her face, "I would have walked…" but before he could get it out, she repeated it almost word for word.

"Ten miles in the pouring rain to get to you if you needed me."

This moment was just getting better and better. He nodded at her reply, looking into those beautiful green eyes that stared back at him with so much happiness, representing everything they had been fighting to get back too. "God Carly, you can make me so happy at times I'm not even sure I'm deserving."

"You are," she reassured him, pulling him down to her lips, "you are," she whispered again before she kissed him.

* * *

"My clothes are sticking to me like glue," Carly yelled out to him from her room down the hall as she changed.

Steve struggled to get the wet T-shirt over his head, "Ahh! Me too." He slipped his shoes and wet socks off, moving over toward the dresser.

"I'm almost considering putting my clothes in the dryer first," Carly said shivering as she slipped her shorts off.

Steve stood at his dresser with the drawer halfway pulled out, suddenly transfixed by her image in the mirror across the way. He watched her through the slight opening in the door as she began to unbutton her blouse and continue to talk to him, not realizing she was being watched. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn't stop himself. She was too beautiful and it was probably the most erotic thing he'd ever watched in his entire life. Her wet hair hung partially in her face as she looked down, working on each button.

"If the lights go out, you know we'll have to eat all the ice cream in the freezer," she smiled, undoing the last button and looking up. "We wouldn't want it to…" she stopped mid-sentence seeing his reflection in the same mirror across the hall, watching her. She quickly closed her blouse and they made eye contact just before she reached over closing the door.

She wasn't so upset with him watching her, as she was that he might have seen the ugly scars on her body. She cupped her hands over her mouth, shocked over it, yet as she stood there replaying it in her head a smile slowly began to emerge on her face recalling the enchanted look on his. He wasn't gawking at her like some teenage boy; he was admiring her from afar. Her heart fluttered, feeling attractive for the first time since her ordeal, and by the look on his face, desirable was also impending on her horizon.

She let her hands slide down her body and over her breasts, thinking what it would be like for him to do that to her. His hands on any part of her body would be a treat. She stared at the door, hoping she hadn't given him the impression she was angry by practically slamming it in his face. Her heart fluttered again, only not in the same pleasing fashion.

Steve let his head fall forward and rest on the top of the dresser. "You fucking idiot," he mumbled to himself. "What is the matter with you?" He banged it gently twice, scolding himself over what he considered very poor judgment. "I can't believe you did that. Oh my God."  
He braced both hands on the dresser, hanging his head; convinced he had just taken a giant leap back from everything he had accomplished that night. He tried to remember what her face looked like before she shut the door. Was it shock? Or was it more appalled? It didn't matter either way; both were one in the same when it came to this scenario. He had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He had no idea what to say to her to rectify this situation and was trying to find the right words when he looked over, seeing her standing in the doorway.

She smiled, knowing by the look on his face that he felt guilty as hell. "I'm not mad." She blurted out, wanting to take that initial fear out of him.

"Carly," he sighed with so much affliction in his voice, "I'm so sorry. I was just standing here and," he pointed to where he was looking, "and I saw you, and I just," he shook his head, having no excuse except that he wanted to see her naked, but couldn't come out and say that. "I just…"

"Couldn't turn away," she teased him.

"I could have, yes. I should have!" he quickly countered.

"I have to admit, I'm a little flattered that you took such a long calculated look." She moved toward him, still wearing the shirt but had put on another pair of shorts.

He raised an eyebrow in surprise, "You are?"

She nodded, playing with the top button, "Yes," she slightly shrugged, "it was kind of nice being admired in such a way."

He grinned, "Well, you are quite the spectacle. I lied when I said I could have turned away. I couldn't."

She stood right before him looking down, still toying with the top button. "So you…liked what you saw?"

"I saw you," he declared as if that was a gift in itself, "so yes, I liked it very much."

She looked up at his face, seeing it in his eyes. He stood before her half-dressed, that body so strong and the man inside it so agile and loving she thought her heart might leap right out of her chest and land in his hand. It might as well have she thought, he owned it that was for sure. "I was thinking about what you said earlier," she took a breath, "about you wanting me..." she looked over at the bed but couldn't bring herself to say the word, feeling shy, "in here."

"I like having you close to me all the time. That's what I want." He didn't want her to think it was just for sex. That would come in time, for right now he was happy just having this conversation with her. "But if it makes you uncomfortable, then I don't want it."

A flash of lightning came in through the glass doors on the lanai and Carly grinned, "I might have ended up in here anyway."

He smiled back; putting his arms around her in a protective manner, "Wait for it," he teased her.

Carly laughed, burying her face against his shoulder. She jumped as it came with a loud boom that shook the windows. Her arms went around him, not scared in the least but actually enjoying it. It felt nice being under his protection. She hoped the storm lasted all night.

* * *

It wasn't awkward in the least sharing his bed. She attributed that all to him. He didn't make it seem unusual, but more as if it was any regular night. He held a conversation with her about the next day events and what his plans were. He kept his sweat pants on and got in first indicating which side was hers so there would be no guessing on her part. His side was closest to the door, which she assumed was another one of his protective maneuvers.

She had on a satin nightshirt that she wore often and a pair of soft cotton shorts underneath. She slid in next to him, lying on her back, looking out the glass doors. "It's still raining so hard." She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do, or what he was going to do. Did he expect sex from her? The thought of him seeing her naked sent her into a panic. No matter how much she was beginning to feel like her old self again, physically she'd never be the same. He had to face that eventually too, she thought.

He leaned over and turned the light out. "I think the thunder and lightning show is over. It's been quiet for a while." He rolled over on his side, looking at her. It was surreal to see her lying there again after so long.

She turned her head to see him, "I hope I don't snore."

He laughed, "You do, like a sailor."

She looked shocked at first and then realized he was teasing her again. She rolled over on her side toward him. "I'll try to keep it down."

"Good, because I'm exhausted. You wore me out today," he grinned. "Too much excitement for me." He slid an arm under her and pulled her close, rolling over on his back. She went with him willingly, resting her head on his bare shoulder. It was so quick she barely had time to react to it. But as she settled in with his arm around her and hers draped over him, she was surprised how incredibly comfortable it was. She imagined this was the norm for them.

"Good night, Steve."

He squeezed her, "Good night." He closed his eyes for the first time in almost two months and didn't have to wish she were there, he had her in his arms again. He was going to sleep like a baby.

* * *

Carly felt him move and opened her eyes. They were in a different position now. They were both on their sides, facing each other but he was higher up on the pillow than she was. One of them had kicked the sheet off. She went to move and realized he had one of his legs entwined around hers and his arm rested on her hip.

She closed her eyes trying to go back to sleep, but couldn't get beyond the presence of him. It was different from when they first went to sleep. She felt more relaxed now and he was certainly the same. She could feel his warm breath on her hair as he slept soundly. It reminded her of the night in the hospital when she had woken up and he was there.

She opened her eyes, focusing on his chest in front of her. She could just make out the scars that were visible in the light. She reached her hand up and carefully touched one, gliding her finger over it, wondering if it hurt when he got it. She couldn't see his 'lucky scar' but looked up in the direction of where it was located. His broad shoulders seemed towering from were she lied. She scanned down his body, following his stomach until it disappeared inside his sweats; she felt her face flush wondering if what was inside was as magnificent as the rest of him. She toyed with the string on his pants, letting it slip through her fingers.

She looked up at him, watching him sleep. His lips were slightly parted and looked so inviting. She wanted more of what he offered her earlier. It was too good to not want more. Her fingers touched his throat, feeling his whiskers as she gently made her way down until her fingers could feel the beginning of his heart beat. She watched his chest expand as he took in a deep breath and at the same time hers fingers picked up the vibration of his rapidly beating heart. She looked back up at him and he stared down at her.

She let out a tiny gasp, not so much over being caught exploring but by the way he looked at her. His eyes were already making love to her and he hadn't even touched her yet. She could feel the heat from his body reach across and cover her like a blanket. She felt tingly all over and heard a small moan escape from her lips, begging for what he was offering. He was as beautiful as any man she had ever seen, but he loved her, which made her want for him even that much more eager.

He had been awake the whole time, not wanting to interrupt her exploration. It felt too good. Everywhere she touched left a trail of exploding nerve endings, testing his will and stamina. It was by far the most difficult, yet rewarding fight against himself he'd ever encountered. He had to control the urge to moan at one point when she played with the string on his sweats. But once her fingers glided down his throat and over his chest, he couldn't take it anymore. Memories of the two of them were too embedded in him to let this moment go un-attended for another second. He wanted her too badly and his body had missed that gratifying sensation of being inside her. More than anything else, he wanted to feel that bond with her again.

He slid down until he was even with her, repositioning his leg so it went between hers, using his hand that rested on her hip to pull her thigh up so her leg was now draped over his.

She lay face to face with him, their bodies so close neither one could distinguish whose heartbeat was whose. If given the opportunity to be anywhere else in the world at that second, she would have declined. It felt perfect. She was overwhelmed by the fact that she was exactly where she was supposed to be.

"I love you," she whispered to him. It was the most logical thing to say because it signified everything she was feeling.

He thought he'd died and gone to heaven. Not only was he getting permission but also she was feeling everything he was, which made the moment so much more gratifying.

He kissed her, rolling her over on her back and moving between her legs.

She pulled down on his hips, getting a feel of just how bad he wanted her as he let the weight of his body relax down on top of her. His kiss was deep and meaningful, not at all rushed. He took his time, getting a read on her body language just like he used to. He knew her inside and out knowing what type of sex she wanted just from the first kiss. Tonight he'd ease into it, let her set the pace. She used to like that.

Carly tilted her head back, letting him have free access as he made his way down her throat. She put her hand on the back of his head guiding him, feeling the tip of his tongue between kisses as he made his way up to just below her ear. She let him play there for a moment until the urge for him became too great and she turned toward his lips, kissing him. He tasted so good, almost as sweet as sugar.

The lower half of her body began to feel the same need. She felt his hand slide down there as if reading her mind.

He was in another world when he was with her. Her body was like a treasure that he adored and cherished. He never took it for granted and was always amazed at the newest pleasures it would give him. It truly was the gift that kept on giving. He pushed up above her, sitting back on his heels between her legs, his hands stroking her stomach over her shirt, up and over her breasts and then making his way back down between her thighs over her shorts. Her body reacted to his touch and she reached down taking him by the wrist, begging him to stop the delightful torment. She was ready for the next step. She slid her hands under her shorts and he helped her slide them off over her knees, discarding them on the side of the bed.

He went to do the same with her shirt, when she grabbed his wrist again, only more forceful this time.

"No Steve," she panted, "don't take it off."

"Why not?" he asked, moving up on her.

"You know why," she followed his eyes as he faced her.

He knew exactly where this was going, anticipating it. "Do you like it when I touch you Carly?"

"Yes, but its different there. You have to know that."  
"Nothings changed, not for me." His hand eased underneath her shirt, seeing the apprehension in her eyes, "I love you Carly. I've known what's under there; I saw it first hand the night it happened. But it's not scars that I feel, it's healing, it's you coming back to me, that's what I feel when I touch you there, and I'm in love with every inch of it."

She could feel his hand caressing over the area, his eyes fixated on hers, reassuring her everything he said was true. His touch was therapeutic, she'd never thought of it that way, or ever considered how good it could feel having a warm, strong hand embrace it. She didn't recognize them anymore as scars, but her battle to beat out death and because of him she survived it. She felt a whole new appreciation for them the same as he did when talking about his 'lucky scar'.

She smiled up at him, reaching down and removing the shirt on her own.

He kissed her for that, long and deep, wrapping his arms around her naked body.

Her confidence level shot through the roof. She wanted him, feeling no apprehension or uneasiness. He shooed that away, giving her the freedom as always to do what made her feel good, and right now it was him.

She pulled down on his sweat pants, freeing him up in the same way, using her feet to get them all the way off. Her hands feeling every muscle on his body as he rose above her. She didn't want any more foreplay, not this time; she was too eager for him now and let her proposal be known by physically taking him and easing him into her.

He was blinded by sheer pleasure over her boldness as he began to move on her, mirroring her movements until they found their rhythm. The sounds of pleasure coming from her and the way her thighs tightened around his hips, forcing hers up into him was almost more than he could take. He almost bit through his bottom lip trying to refrain from climaxing too soon it felt so good. It was progressing too fast and he had to calm it or he would. He got both arms around her and lifted her off the bed, sitting back, taking her with him. She held on around his neck, straddling him and resting with him deep inside her. He held her securely around the waist with one arm and the other across her back with his hand buried in her hair.

She tilted her head to the side as he devoured her neck, "Ahh yes," she moaned, "this is good."

He smiled, searching out her lips, "You feel good." He reached up with his mouth giving her quick short kisses, backing away when she would try to return them, toying with her.

"Don't tease me sir," she warned.

He pulled her closer again, brushing his lips against hers, "What are you going to do me if I do?"

She grinned mischievously at him moving her hips ever so gently back and forth, staring right at him. She smiled brighter when his expression went from teasing to pure ecstasy. She felt his arm around her waist tighten and his shoulder muscles tense up.

"Carly stop," he moaned, but even as he pleaded with her, he used his arm to bring her in closer, forcing her hips down, returning the pleasure.

"Don't stop," she gasped.

He leaned forward laying her back on the bed. She wrapped her body around him as he found that familiar rhythm that drove her over the edge. He'd been saving it until now.

She was glad now that she had removed her shirt, because the friction from his body against hers was just as much of a turn on as his performance. The humidity from the rain made the room warm, but with the extra curricular activity going on they both began to feel the heat. She kissed his neck, tasting the sweat that began to form as he moved her to another level. Every muscle in his body was working to bring her to what she could only describe as an earth shattering pleasure. She felt the power of it growing and it was as if he had crawled inside her body and felt it too because it was then that he lifted her off the bed, pulling her closer to him. She felt weightless in his arms as they both clung to each other their bodies peaking at the same time, sharing it with the other.

They lay motionless, yet their bodies still convulsed from the affair, each one trying to catch their breath, not only from the exertion but also from the orgasm that left both of them depleted. Steve felt a bead of sweat roll down the side of his face but was too weak to do anything about it. He didn't want to move anyway. He wanted to stay in this position for the rest of his life. He was convinced he could live happily right here being nourished by her body. He felt her hands begin to move over his back and he let out a deep pleasurable moan, telling her how good it felt.

He rolled over on his side, taking her with him, wanting to keep her close. He brushed his hand over her hair, wiping away the sweat that had built up on her forehead. She watched him intently feeling so much love for him she thought she might burst at the seams.

They lay facing each other, neither one saying a word, but what had changed between them was loud and clear. She understood now why he was there every day and every night after she had woken up. This had been their life. It was no wonder he had fought so hard to get it back. She would have done the same for him.

"Thank you," she whispered, fighting back tears as she struggled to say what she wanted too. "Thank you for holding my hand through it all and bringing me back to this place." She realized her life could have easily gone in a different direction had she gone home with her parents, but he fought for her, carefully guiding her into the light. She laid her head against this shoulder and stated to cry, overcome by it all and how close she came to losing him.

He didn't say anything. He didn't have too. He just held her close and let her ease back into her life with him. That's all he wanted anyway, he didn't need recognition, he just needed to be right where he was.

* * *

_Author Note: Hi, I'm leaving for Hawaii in the morning for 11 days and probably won't get much writing done while I'm there, even though inspiration will be everywhere!_

_So I apologize for making you wait for the next chapter…BUT, thanks as always for even reading! Aloha!_


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